Alaskan Holiday
Page 31
A slight frown marred her smile. “I don’t know if it will be enough for me, Palmer.”
There was a lull in the conversation and our salads were delivered. Neither of us reached for our forks.
“Are you saying you have no desire to return to Ponder?” I asked. I might as well get the question out in the open. If I was beating my head against a brick wall, then I needed to know it now. It was more like beating my heart against a brick wall.
“You heard me defend Ponder last night,” Josie reminded me.
“Yes, but you didn’t say you wanted to live there.”
The warmth in her eyes told me everything. Everything that I needed to know—that she loved me. My heart pounded so loudly that I couldn’t hear myself speak.
Looking down, Josie smoothed the cloth napkin across her lap. “If I had a good reason, Palmer, I’d go back to Ponder.”
I stretched my arm across the table and took hold of her hand. “I know how badly I messed up the first time I asked you to marry me. I love you, Josie. You deserve all the right romantic words, and more than anything, I wish I could give you all that and more. But that’s not me. I’m just a guy who can’t imagine not having you in my life. When you came to Ponder it felt like I’d found the one person in the world who would complete me. I couldn’t wait to spend time with you. Being with you was the best part of my day. My work is my passion, or it was until I met you. You’re everything to me. I’d hoped I’d showed you that by helping you get back to Seattle for your job. Your happiness is important to me. You’re important to me.”
“You’re important to me, too.”
“I wanted you to miss me and reconsider my proposal.”
“Marrying you and living in Ponder wasn’t an easy decision. I needed that time away. I had to give my dream a chance to find out if it was what I’d always hoped it would be. It wasn’t, and I realized how much I loved you. Nothing was the way I’d imagined. Then things between us changed and I didn’t know why. You didn’t seem to have time for me any longer, and I didn’t know what to think.”
I was embarrassed to admit the truth. Seeing that we were both laying it all on the table, I had to be as honest with Josie as she was being with me. “I lost heart and felt it was best to own up to the fact that if I was losing you to Chef Anton, then the best thing to do was cut my losses.”
“It was about that stupid Facebook post? Why didn’t you ask me about it? If you had, I’d have explained everything. It was my first day on the job and I had no clue what I was getting myself into.”
She brought up a good point. “I didn’t feel I could,” I admitted, “seeing that I was the one who insisted we not discuss the chef. Nor did I want you to feel like I’d become a stalker.”
She laughed. “Palmer, honestly, reading my Facebook posts doesn’t make you a stalker.”
I was shaking inside, wanting her so badly. I wasn’t sure what more I could say but felt I had to try. “You know I love you. If I knew any poetry, I’d recite it. If I could play the guitar, I’d serenade you. Sadly, I can’t do either. All I can tell you is that my heart is yours if you want it, Josie.”
She smiled that beautiful smile I loved so much. The smile that encouraged me.
I quickly added, “I want to make a life with you as my wife, and if you’re willing to go a step further with me, I want to create a family with you.”
I waited, wanting her to respond with a quick yes, but instead she was dabbing at her eyes with the linen napkin. “So,” I said, releasing a deep breath, “which way are you leaning?”
Josie nodded.
“That’s a yes?”
“Yes, Palmer, it’s a resounding yes. What did you think I was telling you?”
I couldn’t sit still. I jumped up from the booth and knelt beside her. Her warm hands framed my face and she leaned over and kissed me. It seemed the entire restaurant went strangely quiet, but I couldn’t care less. I had everything I needed for a perfect Christmas. I had Josie.
After several kisses, Josie raised her head. “You better get up off your knees. People are looking at us.”
I kissed the back of her hand and returned to my seat, jubilant and excited. Reaching across the table, we held hands, neither of us interested in our meals.
“We’d live in Ponder, right?” she asked.
“In-season, for sure. Off-season is negotiable. The property in Fairbanks looks promising. Where we live will be where you’re the most comfortable, Josie, especially after we start a family.”
“I so want children,” Josie whispered.
“Me, too.” I raised her hand to my lips and kissed her knuckles, unable to hold back. “I know you’re passionate about your work. We’ll find a way for you to use your talent and education, I promise you, Josie. Ponder isn’t the end of the world; people still need to eat.”
“Your faith in me means everything. I have confidence that I’ll think of something: in fact, I have a couple ideas already. You should know, the way I feel right now, becoming your wife, sharing your life, making mine a part of yours, it’s everything I would ever want or need.”
My heart had settled down to a normal, steady beat, so I could breathe again. “Did I do better this time?” I asked. “With the proposal?”
“Much better, but I wouldn’t mind you telling me again how much you admire my straight, white teeth.”
Groaning, I shook my head. “I blame Jack for that fiasco.”
“Then you should know your style of proposing is everything a woman could hope for from the man she loves.”
“Thank you.” I wasn’t a quick study, but I did my best.
The server approached our table, and she noticed that neither of us had touched our meals. “Can I get either of you something different?” she asked.
I looked away from Josie for just a moment. “I think we’re good. No,” I corrected myself quickly, “on second thought, we’d like to order a bottle of champagne.”
“Are you celebrating a special occasion?” she asked, having read the situation perfectly.
I doubt we could have fooled anyone in the vicinity around us.
“We’re getting married.”
The server’s face lit up. “That’s wonderful. Congratulations! A holiday proposal. It doesn’t get any more romantic than that.”
EPILOGUE
Josie
Three years later
I wrote down another ingredient and then went back to the stovetop and stirred the fresh ginger into the squash soup.
“Is it ready yet?” Jack asked. He sat at the kitchen counter, eagerly eyeing the pot on the burner.
“Give it a minute. I want the ginger to blend into it before you taste it.”
Jack sat ready and waiting with a spoon clenched in his hand. He was always the first to try my recipes. My blog, which featured recipes with ingredients local to Alaska, had taken off, and I had a following of more than two hundred and fifty thousand now. The popularity had garnered the attention of several advertisers, who were seeking placement on my blog.
When Palmer and I married I’d wondered how I would be able to use my culinary degree living in a remote Alaskan location. Angie encouraged me to write a food blog.
In my first entry, I shared my recipe for moose stroganoff, along with the story of Jack the hunting guide and his love of food. I put it out on the Internet, not expecting much. Then Angie had reposted it to her own loyal following. The sharing and resharing turned it into something magical. Responses poured in, asking for more, and my audience had been growing ever since.
I called my blog My Alaskan Holiday: Creating Amazing Dishes with the Bounties of Nature. I’d never expected to bring in an income from writing about a subject that I dearly loved. I was astonished and speechless when the Cooking Channel contacted me about a possible television show featuring my recipes based on wild game, native fish, berries…all from Alaska, including stories about the nature all around us and our lifestyle in this remote burg. It was hard to believe that my life was coming together like this.
“It should be ready by now. Right?” Jack asked, interrupting my thoughts.
There was a lull in the conversation and our salads were delivered. Neither of us reached for our forks.
“Are you saying you have no desire to return to Ponder?” I asked. I might as well get the question out in the open. If I was beating my head against a brick wall, then I needed to know it now. It was more like beating my heart against a brick wall.
“You heard me defend Ponder last night,” Josie reminded me.
“Yes, but you didn’t say you wanted to live there.”
The warmth in her eyes told me everything. Everything that I needed to know—that she loved me. My heart pounded so loudly that I couldn’t hear myself speak.
Looking down, Josie smoothed the cloth napkin across her lap. “If I had a good reason, Palmer, I’d go back to Ponder.”
I stretched my arm across the table and took hold of her hand. “I know how badly I messed up the first time I asked you to marry me. I love you, Josie. You deserve all the right romantic words, and more than anything, I wish I could give you all that and more. But that’s not me. I’m just a guy who can’t imagine not having you in my life. When you came to Ponder it felt like I’d found the one person in the world who would complete me. I couldn’t wait to spend time with you. Being with you was the best part of my day. My work is my passion, or it was until I met you. You’re everything to me. I’d hoped I’d showed you that by helping you get back to Seattle for your job. Your happiness is important to me. You’re important to me.”
“You’re important to me, too.”
“I wanted you to miss me and reconsider my proposal.”
“Marrying you and living in Ponder wasn’t an easy decision. I needed that time away. I had to give my dream a chance to find out if it was what I’d always hoped it would be. It wasn’t, and I realized how much I loved you. Nothing was the way I’d imagined. Then things between us changed and I didn’t know why. You didn’t seem to have time for me any longer, and I didn’t know what to think.”
I was embarrassed to admit the truth. Seeing that we were both laying it all on the table, I had to be as honest with Josie as she was being with me. “I lost heart and felt it was best to own up to the fact that if I was losing you to Chef Anton, then the best thing to do was cut my losses.”
“It was about that stupid Facebook post? Why didn’t you ask me about it? If you had, I’d have explained everything. It was my first day on the job and I had no clue what I was getting myself into.”
She brought up a good point. “I didn’t feel I could,” I admitted, “seeing that I was the one who insisted we not discuss the chef. Nor did I want you to feel like I’d become a stalker.”
She laughed. “Palmer, honestly, reading my Facebook posts doesn’t make you a stalker.”
I was shaking inside, wanting her so badly. I wasn’t sure what more I could say but felt I had to try. “You know I love you. If I knew any poetry, I’d recite it. If I could play the guitar, I’d serenade you. Sadly, I can’t do either. All I can tell you is that my heart is yours if you want it, Josie.”
She smiled that beautiful smile I loved so much. The smile that encouraged me.
I quickly added, “I want to make a life with you as my wife, and if you’re willing to go a step further with me, I want to create a family with you.”
I waited, wanting her to respond with a quick yes, but instead she was dabbing at her eyes with the linen napkin. “So,” I said, releasing a deep breath, “which way are you leaning?”
Josie nodded.
“That’s a yes?”
“Yes, Palmer, it’s a resounding yes. What did you think I was telling you?”
I couldn’t sit still. I jumped up from the booth and knelt beside her. Her warm hands framed my face and she leaned over and kissed me. It seemed the entire restaurant went strangely quiet, but I couldn’t care less. I had everything I needed for a perfect Christmas. I had Josie.
After several kisses, Josie raised her head. “You better get up off your knees. People are looking at us.”
I kissed the back of her hand and returned to my seat, jubilant and excited. Reaching across the table, we held hands, neither of us interested in our meals.
“We’d live in Ponder, right?” she asked.
“In-season, for sure. Off-season is negotiable. The property in Fairbanks looks promising. Where we live will be where you’re the most comfortable, Josie, especially after we start a family.”
“I so want children,” Josie whispered.
“Me, too.” I raised her hand to my lips and kissed her knuckles, unable to hold back. “I know you’re passionate about your work. We’ll find a way for you to use your talent and education, I promise you, Josie. Ponder isn’t the end of the world; people still need to eat.”
“Your faith in me means everything. I have confidence that I’ll think of something: in fact, I have a couple ideas already. You should know, the way I feel right now, becoming your wife, sharing your life, making mine a part of yours, it’s everything I would ever want or need.”
My heart had settled down to a normal, steady beat, so I could breathe again. “Did I do better this time?” I asked. “With the proposal?”
“Much better, but I wouldn’t mind you telling me again how much you admire my straight, white teeth.”
Groaning, I shook my head. “I blame Jack for that fiasco.”
“Then you should know your style of proposing is everything a woman could hope for from the man she loves.”
“Thank you.” I wasn’t a quick study, but I did my best.
The server approached our table, and she noticed that neither of us had touched our meals. “Can I get either of you something different?” she asked.
I looked away from Josie for just a moment. “I think we’re good. No,” I corrected myself quickly, “on second thought, we’d like to order a bottle of champagne.”
“Are you celebrating a special occasion?” she asked, having read the situation perfectly.
I doubt we could have fooled anyone in the vicinity around us.
“We’re getting married.”
The server’s face lit up. “That’s wonderful. Congratulations! A holiday proposal. It doesn’t get any more romantic than that.”
EPILOGUE
Josie
Three years later
I wrote down another ingredient and then went back to the stovetop and stirred the fresh ginger into the squash soup.
“Is it ready yet?” Jack asked. He sat at the kitchen counter, eagerly eyeing the pot on the burner.
“Give it a minute. I want the ginger to blend into it before you taste it.”
Jack sat ready and waiting with a spoon clenched in his hand. He was always the first to try my recipes. My blog, which featured recipes with ingredients local to Alaska, had taken off, and I had a following of more than two hundred and fifty thousand now. The popularity had garnered the attention of several advertisers, who were seeking placement on my blog.
When Palmer and I married I’d wondered how I would be able to use my culinary degree living in a remote Alaskan location. Angie encouraged me to write a food blog.
In my first entry, I shared my recipe for moose stroganoff, along with the story of Jack the hunting guide and his love of food. I put it out on the Internet, not expecting much. Then Angie had reposted it to her own loyal following. The sharing and resharing turned it into something magical. Responses poured in, asking for more, and my audience had been growing ever since.
I called my blog My Alaskan Holiday: Creating Amazing Dishes with the Bounties of Nature. I’d never expected to bring in an income from writing about a subject that I dearly loved. I was astonished and speechless when the Cooking Channel contacted me about a possible television show featuring my recipes based on wild game, native fish, berries…all from Alaska, including stories about the nature all around us and our lifestyle in this remote burg. It was hard to believe that my life was coming together like this.
“It should be ready by now. Right?” Jack asked, interrupting my thoughts.
