All the Pretty Lies
Page 32
And, just like he intended, with our bodies joined and him staring into my eyes, I feel exactly what’s been in his heart all this time.
It’s the same thing that’s been in mine.
Eternity. Eternity together. Eternity in love.
EPILOGUE - Sloane
18 months later
“I have no clue why you’re nervous. Personally, I think you’re batshit crazy.”
“Sarah, I’m not batshit crazy. I’m not crazy at all. I just don’t know how he’ll react.”
“Yes, you do. He loves you, dumb ass.”
“I know he loves me, but…”
“But what?”
“We’ve always talked about the future as being after the trial. Well, the trial is over. It’s been four months since Duncan was convicted of involuntary manslaughter of Hemi’s brother. Four months since my brother was cleared of all suspicion after they busted Duncan. And even longer since they proved Duncan used Steven’s security pass that he’d been stealing at night. Now we’re free to move on. Just like Hemi said we would. Only he hasn’t really talked about it much. At least not seriously. Not like we’re making definitive plans. And now this.”
This!
“Speaking of all that cloak and dagger shit, have they still not figured out a way to tie Duncan to the death of his informant? That guy who was muling all those drugs who just happened to have a very nasty, very fatal car accident after Hemi’s brother died and Duncan got too scared to continue?”
“Nope. He may end up getting away with that one. He thought he’d tied up all the loose ends. He just didn’t count on Hemi. One thing you can be sure of, though. My brother won’t rest until Duncan has paid for all his crimes. Steven was devastated. And Duncan’s father was appalled. I mean, Duncan used him to get the details on the coke bust to start with. Otherwise he’d never have known how much was locked up down there.”
“Well, even if he doesn’t get convicted of it by the courts, some big jailbird named Bubba will make it right. He’ll take it right out of Duncan’s ass. The hard way.”
“Ewww, Sarah!”
She giggles at my reaction and I smile and shake my head. I press my foot to the brake, stopping at the stop sign before turning onto the street where Hemi and I now live. A few months ago, we bought a beautiful house in a subdivision right outside Atlanta and he’s there today finishing up the painting of the office. Even though I don’t like being away from him, even if it’s for a little while, I’m filled with anxiety about going home.
Since that trip to the hospital when I had the flu, Hemi and I haven’t spent one night apart. I graduated college three months ago and we both work full-time at The Ink Stain now. We’re together a lot. And it never gets old. I never get tired of him. I think, if anything, I just want him more. I love him more.
We’ve talked about the future quite a bit. I’m just now twenty-three and Hemi is thirty. We’ve talked about what comes next, but haven’t made any set plans. We’ve even talked about having kids, which we decided to consider more after the wedding. Of course, I wanted to get started immediately. Or six months ago.
Now, that won’t be an issue.
My stomach flips over nervously. “Well,” I begin, addressing Sarah. “I’m almost home. I guess I’d better go. Wish me luck.”
“You won’t need luck, Sloane. You’ve got the love of one of God’s rare creatures—a good man. You won’t ever need luck again.”
I feel a tiny bit better after hearing that. But it doesn’t completely eradicate my anxiety.
“I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“Okay. If all else fails, take off your clothes.”
“That’s good, sound advice. Why didn’t I think of that?”
“Trust me. It works,” she declares. “Anyway, call me tomorrow, chickie.”
“Tomorrow,” I agree returning her kiss noise before disconnecting.
I park in the garage and hit the button to close the door as I make my way up the short set of steps that lead into the house.
I check the office first. I get a little pang when I take in the pale sage walls, a color I picked out so that when a baby does come along, we won’t have to repaint and worry about fumes while I’m pregnant.
Now, that won’t be an issue either.
Hemi’s nowhere to be found, so I head for the master. I kick off my shoes and throw them into the closet as I pass, moving toward the bathroom where the light is on. Hemi is standing at the counter, in front of the sink, holding something in his hand.
When I stop just inside the doorway, he looks up and smiles.
“Hey, beautiful. How’d it go?”
“Just fine. No cavities, even though you keep carrying me to bed when I fall asleep on the couch and not waking me up to brush my teeth.”
He grins. “But you’re so sweet when you’re sleeping. I don’t have the heart to wake you up.”
I step farther into the room, melting into him and poking my finger in his chest. “Well, you’d better start, mister. I don’t want my teeth to rot out.”
“I thought you said they’re fine.”
“They are. I’m just saying I don’t want it to be a problem.”
“Then I’ll start waking you up. But be warned that if I wake you up and you look at me with those sleepy, sexy eyes of yours, it’s liable to prolong you actually getting to sleep.”
“Okay,” I reply with a grin of my own. Finally, I glance down at his hand. My stomach sinks when I see what he’s holding. “Why are you holding my birth control pills?”
Hemi glances down at the little pink case, turning it over and over in his fingers. “I was just thinking about the trial and how things can finally move forward now that it’s over. My brother’s killer got justice. Your brother’s betrayer got uncovered. There’s nothing holding us back. Nothing preventing me from putting a baby in this beautiful body and watching it grow.”
I feel my throat close around a lump of emotion. Tears sting my eyes and there’s nothing I can do to stop them. “Really?”
“Really,” he assures. “What would you say if I threw these away? Right this minute. Just dumped them in the trash and dragged you into the bedroom to ravage you?”
“I would say that I need to throw them out anyway.”
His brow wrinkles. “What? Why?”
“You remember last month when you insisted that I go to the doctor for that sinus infection?”
“Yes, but I only did that because you’d never have gone if I didn’t keep harassing you. And you’d have ended up being sick for a lot longer.”
“Well, remember he gave me a round of antibiotics? I didn’t think anything about us using some other form of birth control for the rest of the month. I don’t know why, but I just didn’t.”
“What do you mean? Why would we need to do that?”
“Antibiotics can interfere with birth control. You’re supposed to use a back-up method for the month that you’re taking the antibiotics.”
“So what are you saying?”
“I’m saying I didn’t even think about it. And we didn’t use any other forms of birth control. And…”
The words die on my tongue. All of a sudden this is very real. This is a very significant milestone for us. A curve in the road. A turning point. I’ll know in a minute if Hemi is as steadfast as he says, as he seems. I’ll know if he’s really in this for the long haul.
“Are you saying you’re pregnant?” he breathes.
I feel my chin tremble as I nod.
Hemi closes his eyes as he exhales, dropping his forehead to mine. “Oh my God. Oh my God, I can’t believe this.”
My stomach is a knot of confusion and fear. I don’t know what to make of his reaction. But I’m terrified he’s not happy about the news.
But then Hemi drops to his knees in front of me. Slowly, he lifts my shirt and presses his lips to my still-flat belly. He doesn’t move for the longest time. All I feel is the warm air from his nose as it tickles my skin.
When he finally shifts, it’s only to speak. His lips move over my belly, his voice so low I have to strain to hear him.
“Hello in there, baby Spencer,” he whispers. “I’m your dad. I can’t wait for you to get here, to see what you look like and how you feel in my arms. But until then, know that I love you already. And I always will. To my dying breath, I’ll love you. Just like I love your mom.”
I don’t even bother to try and stop the tears that are streaming down my face and dripping off my nose to pepper the top of Hemi’s head. It’s like the baby we made, though only five weeks old, is being christened, christened with tears of joy. Hemi and I have both already cried so much in our lives, tears of sadness and pain, of fear and anger. But now there is no room for any of that, just like there’s no room for regret. Now, there is only the beauty of today and the hope of tomorrow, and the love that we share in between.
And if I die an untimely death like my mother before me, I’ll have lived every second of every day of my life with all the bravery and enthusiasm and love that I’m capable of. And I’ll have lived it with Hemi. And our child. There’s nothing more that I could ask for in life.
Not. One. Single. Thing.
THE END
It’s the same thing that’s been in mine.
Eternity. Eternity together. Eternity in love.
EPILOGUE - Sloane
18 months later
“I have no clue why you’re nervous. Personally, I think you’re batshit crazy.”
“Sarah, I’m not batshit crazy. I’m not crazy at all. I just don’t know how he’ll react.”
“Yes, you do. He loves you, dumb ass.”
“I know he loves me, but…”
“But what?”
“We’ve always talked about the future as being after the trial. Well, the trial is over. It’s been four months since Duncan was convicted of involuntary manslaughter of Hemi’s brother. Four months since my brother was cleared of all suspicion after they busted Duncan. And even longer since they proved Duncan used Steven’s security pass that he’d been stealing at night. Now we’re free to move on. Just like Hemi said we would. Only he hasn’t really talked about it much. At least not seriously. Not like we’re making definitive plans. And now this.”
This!
“Speaking of all that cloak and dagger shit, have they still not figured out a way to tie Duncan to the death of his informant? That guy who was muling all those drugs who just happened to have a very nasty, very fatal car accident after Hemi’s brother died and Duncan got too scared to continue?”
“Nope. He may end up getting away with that one. He thought he’d tied up all the loose ends. He just didn’t count on Hemi. One thing you can be sure of, though. My brother won’t rest until Duncan has paid for all his crimes. Steven was devastated. And Duncan’s father was appalled. I mean, Duncan used him to get the details on the coke bust to start with. Otherwise he’d never have known how much was locked up down there.”
“Well, even if he doesn’t get convicted of it by the courts, some big jailbird named Bubba will make it right. He’ll take it right out of Duncan’s ass. The hard way.”
“Ewww, Sarah!”
She giggles at my reaction and I smile and shake my head. I press my foot to the brake, stopping at the stop sign before turning onto the street where Hemi and I now live. A few months ago, we bought a beautiful house in a subdivision right outside Atlanta and he’s there today finishing up the painting of the office. Even though I don’t like being away from him, even if it’s for a little while, I’m filled with anxiety about going home.
Since that trip to the hospital when I had the flu, Hemi and I haven’t spent one night apart. I graduated college three months ago and we both work full-time at The Ink Stain now. We’re together a lot. And it never gets old. I never get tired of him. I think, if anything, I just want him more. I love him more.
We’ve talked about the future quite a bit. I’m just now twenty-three and Hemi is thirty. We’ve talked about what comes next, but haven’t made any set plans. We’ve even talked about having kids, which we decided to consider more after the wedding. Of course, I wanted to get started immediately. Or six months ago.
Now, that won’t be an issue.
My stomach flips over nervously. “Well,” I begin, addressing Sarah. “I’m almost home. I guess I’d better go. Wish me luck.”
“You won’t need luck, Sloane. You’ve got the love of one of God’s rare creatures—a good man. You won’t ever need luck again.”
I feel a tiny bit better after hearing that. But it doesn’t completely eradicate my anxiety.
“I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“Okay. If all else fails, take off your clothes.”
“That’s good, sound advice. Why didn’t I think of that?”
“Trust me. It works,” she declares. “Anyway, call me tomorrow, chickie.”
“Tomorrow,” I agree returning her kiss noise before disconnecting.
I park in the garage and hit the button to close the door as I make my way up the short set of steps that lead into the house.
I check the office first. I get a little pang when I take in the pale sage walls, a color I picked out so that when a baby does come along, we won’t have to repaint and worry about fumes while I’m pregnant.
Now, that won’t be an issue either.
Hemi’s nowhere to be found, so I head for the master. I kick off my shoes and throw them into the closet as I pass, moving toward the bathroom where the light is on. Hemi is standing at the counter, in front of the sink, holding something in his hand.
When I stop just inside the doorway, he looks up and smiles.
“Hey, beautiful. How’d it go?”
“Just fine. No cavities, even though you keep carrying me to bed when I fall asleep on the couch and not waking me up to brush my teeth.”
He grins. “But you’re so sweet when you’re sleeping. I don’t have the heart to wake you up.”
I step farther into the room, melting into him and poking my finger in his chest. “Well, you’d better start, mister. I don’t want my teeth to rot out.”
“I thought you said they’re fine.”
“They are. I’m just saying I don’t want it to be a problem.”
“Then I’ll start waking you up. But be warned that if I wake you up and you look at me with those sleepy, sexy eyes of yours, it’s liable to prolong you actually getting to sleep.”
“Okay,” I reply with a grin of my own. Finally, I glance down at his hand. My stomach sinks when I see what he’s holding. “Why are you holding my birth control pills?”
Hemi glances down at the little pink case, turning it over and over in his fingers. “I was just thinking about the trial and how things can finally move forward now that it’s over. My brother’s killer got justice. Your brother’s betrayer got uncovered. There’s nothing holding us back. Nothing preventing me from putting a baby in this beautiful body and watching it grow.”
I feel my throat close around a lump of emotion. Tears sting my eyes and there’s nothing I can do to stop them. “Really?”
“Really,” he assures. “What would you say if I threw these away? Right this minute. Just dumped them in the trash and dragged you into the bedroom to ravage you?”
“I would say that I need to throw them out anyway.”
His brow wrinkles. “What? Why?”
“You remember last month when you insisted that I go to the doctor for that sinus infection?”
“Yes, but I only did that because you’d never have gone if I didn’t keep harassing you. And you’d have ended up being sick for a lot longer.”
“Well, remember he gave me a round of antibiotics? I didn’t think anything about us using some other form of birth control for the rest of the month. I don’t know why, but I just didn’t.”
“What do you mean? Why would we need to do that?”
“Antibiotics can interfere with birth control. You’re supposed to use a back-up method for the month that you’re taking the antibiotics.”
“So what are you saying?”
“I’m saying I didn’t even think about it. And we didn’t use any other forms of birth control. And…”
The words die on my tongue. All of a sudden this is very real. This is a very significant milestone for us. A curve in the road. A turning point. I’ll know in a minute if Hemi is as steadfast as he says, as he seems. I’ll know if he’s really in this for the long haul.
“Are you saying you’re pregnant?” he breathes.
I feel my chin tremble as I nod.
Hemi closes his eyes as he exhales, dropping his forehead to mine. “Oh my God. Oh my God, I can’t believe this.”
My stomach is a knot of confusion and fear. I don’t know what to make of his reaction. But I’m terrified he’s not happy about the news.
But then Hemi drops to his knees in front of me. Slowly, he lifts my shirt and presses his lips to my still-flat belly. He doesn’t move for the longest time. All I feel is the warm air from his nose as it tickles my skin.
When he finally shifts, it’s only to speak. His lips move over my belly, his voice so low I have to strain to hear him.
“Hello in there, baby Spencer,” he whispers. “I’m your dad. I can’t wait for you to get here, to see what you look like and how you feel in my arms. But until then, know that I love you already. And I always will. To my dying breath, I’ll love you. Just like I love your mom.”
I don’t even bother to try and stop the tears that are streaming down my face and dripping off my nose to pepper the top of Hemi’s head. It’s like the baby we made, though only five weeks old, is being christened, christened with tears of joy. Hemi and I have both already cried so much in our lives, tears of sadness and pain, of fear and anger. But now there is no room for any of that, just like there’s no room for regret. Now, there is only the beauty of today and the hope of tomorrow, and the love that we share in between.
And if I die an untimely death like my mother before me, I’ll have lived every second of every day of my life with all the bravery and enthusiasm and love that I’m capable of. And I’ll have lived it with Hemi. And our child. There’s nothing more that I could ask for in life.
Not. One. Single. Thing.
THE END
