Always on My Mind
Page 37
I love you.
Lori knew she could never say the words aloud. Not only was Grayson not even close to being in an emotional position to give his love to her, but he wouldn’t be able to accept her love, either.
Only, she’d never loved anyone because of what she could get back from them. And, as she pressed her cheek against Grayson’s and felt his breath move with hers, slower now as they shared a perfect moment of closeness, she was shocked to realize that she’d never felt anything this strong, this deep and true, for any other man.
Because what she felt for the man holding her so tightly—as though he was worried she’d disappear if he didn’t make absolutely certain to keep her there with him—was richer, and so much sweeter, than anything she’d ever felt before.
She wanted to heal Grayson, wanted to give him her heart, her love, until they finally overshadowed tragedy and pain.
She wanted to make love with him for hours and hours, knew from his kisses alone that she’d never get her fill of being intimate with him.
She wanted to be his partner and have him trust that she would be there for him in a way that no one else had ever been.
And, oh, how she wanted to see him smile. One perfect smile. One full-bodied laugh. And then she’d know that she’d given him something important, something real, something that mattered.
When he started to rain kisses down over her cheek, and then her chin and neck, she used her dancer’s flexibility to arch way back so that he could have unfettered access to even more of her.
“Damn you for being so tempting,” he growled with a nip at the upper swell of her breast. “Fifteen minutes, that was all we needed to get back to my farm. Fifteen goddamned minutes. Is that too much to ask? Is that too long for you to stop being so irresistible?”
Her heart swelled a little more at every irritated word that fell from his yummy lips. “Mmm,” she said when she could finally find her breath again, “I was wondering where Mr. Crankypants went.”
“I wanted to take my time with you tonight,” he grumbled against her skin as he ran little biting kisses over her shoulder until she was shuddering with need. “But you’re tempting me into taking you right here, right now.”
Maybe it shouldn’t have turned her on, the way he managed to be irritated with her even when they were making out, and yet it did. So, so much. Grayson had made her feel alive even when she believed she was dead to everything she’d once cared about.
She loved the idea of their being in his bed together, of all the wild and wicked ways they could love each other. But as his hands gripped her hips to pull her more tightly into him while he licked up the curve of her neck and sent thrill bumps running over every inch of her, wasn’t it somehow more fitting that they’d end up all over each other in the cab of his truck?
Their relationship had never followed the rules, not from the start, when she’d crashed into his fence post and he’d done everything to get her to leave but pick her up and toss her off his property. And even then, she’d seen something in his eyes that told her he wanted her, despite all the reasons he shouldn’t. Not only a desire for her that matched hers for him, but a soul-deep longing that she also understood. All too well, even when those longings shouldn’t make any sense.
Good thing she’d never cared much whether things made sense. No, she’d always simply followed her heart instead.
Amazingly, her heart had led her here. To Grayson’s farm.
And into his arms.
“I did promise to be the best darn farmhand you’ve ever had,” she reminded him in a husky voice that said as much about how badly she wanted him as any words she spoke. “I’ll bet you never had one who could do this.”
With one quick shimmy, she let the slim straps holding her dress up over her shoulders drop, the bodice covering her br**sts falling down with it.
“Lori.”
She thought she’d be prepared for his reaction this time. After all, he’d seen her br**sts in the cabin during the storm, had tongued and teased them until she’d catapulted all the way over the edge of pleasure. But the way his eyes darkened and desire completely took him over as he gazed at her naked flesh...
No, she’d never get used to being stared at with such overwhelming hunger.
“How am I doing so far?” She reached out to brush her fingertips over the square line of his jaw. When he didn’t answer, just kept staring at the rapidly tightening tips of her br**sts until anticipation had her nearly wild with needing his hands and mouth on her, she teased, “Would you say this is fine?” She purposely used the not-quite-compliment he’d given her so many times before now.
“Nothing has ever been better than this, Lori. Not one goddamned thing.”
Grayson shifted lower on his seat and covered one aching nipple with his mouth, then the other, then both at the same time as he cupped them in his large, strong hands. She arched into his sweet caresses, and groaned aloud when he raked his teeth over her.
He was so big and hard and wonderfully male between her thighs and as she rocked into him, she was already so close that even with her dress and panties still on, her arousal had grown big enough that all it would take was one more tug of his mouth over her and she’d be—
“Oh God...”
Grayson was right there with her in an instant, one of his big hands sliding beneath her dress, up her bare leg and thigh, and inside her damp panties to help intensify the already shockingly sweet climax. With his thumb on her clitoris and two of his fingers slipping in and out of her, her initial orgasm gave way to another, even bigger one.
As she spiraled off and off and off, she cupped his face in her hands and kissed him with every ounce of passion she possessed. He kissed her back just as desperately as he continued to stroke between her thighs, both of their mouths rough and hungry.
When her inner muscles had mostly stopped pulsing in the aftermath of her double climax, she realized just how out of breath she was, that she was panting as hard as if she’d just done all thirty-two of the Black Swan’s fouettés.
“My God, you overwhelm me,” he said, burying his face against her breastbone as he slowly slipped his hand from between her legs to pull her tightly to him again.
She felt him work to regain his control so that they would actually make it out of his truck and into his bed their first time. But Lori knew she couldn’t wait for that anymore, that this was exactly how things were supposed to happen, with both of them too overwhelmed to think straight.
Lori knew she could never say the words aloud. Not only was Grayson not even close to being in an emotional position to give his love to her, but he wouldn’t be able to accept her love, either.
Only, she’d never loved anyone because of what she could get back from them. And, as she pressed her cheek against Grayson’s and felt his breath move with hers, slower now as they shared a perfect moment of closeness, she was shocked to realize that she’d never felt anything this strong, this deep and true, for any other man.
Because what she felt for the man holding her so tightly—as though he was worried she’d disappear if he didn’t make absolutely certain to keep her there with him—was richer, and so much sweeter, than anything she’d ever felt before.
She wanted to heal Grayson, wanted to give him her heart, her love, until they finally overshadowed tragedy and pain.
She wanted to make love with him for hours and hours, knew from his kisses alone that she’d never get her fill of being intimate with him.
She wanted to be his partner and have him trust that she would be there for him in a way that no one else had ever been.
And, oh, how she wanted to see him smile. One perfect smile. One full-bodied laugh. And then she’d know that she’d given him something important, something real, something that mattered.
When he started to rain kisses down over her cheek, and then her chin and neck, she used her dancer’s flexibility to arch way back so that he could have unfettered access to even more of her.
“Damn you for being so tempting,” he growled with a nip at the upper swell of her breast. “Fifteen minutes, that was all we needed to get back to my farm. Fifteen goddamned minutes. Is that too much to ask? Is that too long for you to stop being so irresistible?”
Her heart swelled a little more at every irritated word that fell from his yummy lips. “Mmm,” she said when she could finally find her breath again, “I was wondering where Mr. Crankypants went.”
“I wanted to take my time with you tonight,” he grumbled against her skin as he ran little biting kisses over her shoulder until she was shuddering with need. “But you’re tempting me into taking you right here, right now.”
Maybe it shouldn’t have turned her on, the way he managed to be irritated with her even when they were making out, and yet it did. So, so much. Grayson had made her feel alive even when she believed she was dead to everything she’d once cared about.
She loved the idea of their being in his bed together, of all the wild and wicked ways they could love each other. But as his hands gripped her hips to pull her more tightly into him while he licked up the curve of her neck and sent thrill bumps running over every inch of her, wasn’t it somehow more fitting that they’d end up all over each other in the cab of his truck?
Their relationship had never followed the rules, not from the start, when she’d crashed into his fence post and he’d done everything to get her to leave but pick her up and toss her off his property. And even then, she’d seen something in his eyes that told her he wanted her, despite all the reasons he shouldn’t. Not only a desire for her that matched hers for him, but a soul-deep longing that she also understood. All too well, even when those longings shouldn’t make any sense.
Good thing she’d never cared much whether things made sense. No, she’d always simply followed her heart instead.
Amazingly, her heart had led her here. To Grayson’s farm.
And into his arms.
“I did promise to be the best darn farmhand you’ve ever had,” she reminded him in a husky voice that said as much about how badly she wanted him as any words she spoke. “I’ll bet you never had one who could do this.”
With one quick shimmy, she let the slim straps holding her dress up over her shoulders drop, the bodice covering her br**sts falling down with it.
“Lori.”
She thought she’d be prepared for his reaction this time. After all, he’d seen her br**sts in the cabin during the storm, had tongued and teased them until she’d catapulted all the way over the edge of pleasure. But the way his eyes darkened and desire completely took him over as he gazed at her naked flesh...
No, she’d never get used to being stared at with such overwhelming hunger.
“How am I doing so far?” She reached out to brush her fingertips over the square line of his jaw. When he didn’t answer, just kept staring at the rapidly tightening tips of her br**sts until anticipation had her nearly wild with needing his hands and mouth on her, she teased, “Would you say this is fine?” She purposely used the not-quite-compliment he’d given her so many times before now.
“Nothing has ever been better than this, Lori. Not one goddamned thing.”
Grayson shifted lower on his seat and covered one aching nipple with his mouth, then the other, then both at the same time as he cupped them in his large, strong hands. She arched into his sweet caresses, and groaned aloud when he raked his teeth over her.
He was so big and hard and wonderfully male between her thighs and as she rocked into him, she was already so close that even with her dress and panties still on, her arousal had grown big enough that all it would take was one more tug of his mouth over her and she’d be—
“Oh God...”
Grayson was right there with her in an instant, one of his big hands sliding beneath her dress, up her bare leg and thigh, and inside her damp panties to help intensify the already shockingly sweet climax. With his thumb on her clitoris and two of his fingers slipping in and out of her, her initial orgasm gave way to another, even bigger one.
As she spiraled off and off and off, she cupped his face in her hands and kissed him with every ounce of passion she possessed. He kissed her back just as desperately as he continued to stroke between her thighs, both of their mouths rough and hungry.
When her inner muscles had mostly stopped pulsing in the aftermath of her double climax, she realized just how out of breath she was, that she was panting as hard as if she’d just done all thirty-two of the Black Swan’s fouettés.
“My God, you overwhelm me,” he said, burying his face against her breastbone as he slowly slipped his hand from between her legs to pull her tightly to him again.
She felt him work to regain his control so that they would actually make it out of his truck and into his bed their first time. But Lori knew she couldn’t wait for that anymore, that this was exactly how things were supposed to happen, with both of them too overwhelmed to think straight.
