Anguish
Page 36
“I don’t doubt that. I love my midnight cuddles.”
The front door opens, and we both turn to see Mack striding in. Shit, it’s not six o’clock. What the hell is he doing here? His eyes flick to Tracy and his face gets hard.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
“Mack,” I warn.
He ignores me. “Well?”
Tracy hands Diesel to me, standing. “I just wanted to visit my nephew.”
“After you dropped him off and ran?” Mack bites.
“Mack!” I cry.
“I’m sorry, Miakoda. I just wanted to see him.”
“Don’t call me that, and don’t you think it’s up to me if you see him?”
“Mack!” I yell now, and Diesel starts to cry.
We all look to him, and in an angry whisper, I say, “Well done.”
He glares at me, and storms past. I walk over and touch Tracy’s shoulder. “I’m so sorry.”
She’s got tears in her eyes and it breaks my heart.
“Give me your number. I’ll meet you sometime when I’m out, and you can see Diesel again,” I whisper.
She nods, a tear rolling down her cheek, and writes down her number. I tuck it in my pocket and hug her. She’s frozen for a moment, but soon she’s responding, wrapping her arms around me. I hold her there for a long moment, and she kisses Diesel’s head before letting me go. “Take care of both of them, Jaylah,” she says, so low I almost can’t hear her. “He needs someone to push him. If you don’t, he’ll never discover how amazing Diesel can be for him.” Then she pulls back and leaves without another word. I’m scared and honored that she thinks I’m the one who can do that for them.
I turn to Mack. He’s in the kitchen, clanking things around. Clearly, now isn’t a good time.
I ignore him as I prepare a bottle for Diesel. I feed it to him in silence, and watch as Mack storms around. Boy, is he angry. After feeding Diesel, I start organizing his bath.
I’m not talking to Mack until he calms down, so when the bath is done, I busy myself spending time with Diesel. I play with him, cuddle him, and when six rolls around, I tuck him into bed.
“Things will get better, little man. I promise.”
I stroke my fingers over his soft cheek and then go to face the dragon.
When I get into the kitchen, Mack is standing with a beer in his hand, staring at nothing. It’s now or never.
“Want to tell me what that was all about?” I ask.
“No,” he says, brushing past me and heading towards the couch.
God, this man is difficult. I follow him, and before thinking, I say, “She told me about Ingrid.”
His body flinches and he turns, giving me a hard stare.
“And?”
And? Seriously?
“Mack, come on. You can’t treat everyone like you treated her, or you’ll have no one left.”
“Maybe,” he growls, stepping close, “that’s what I want.”
“No, it’s not.”
He gives me a horrified expression. “And you know me so well, do you?”
“I know enough. I know there’s a sweet-as-hell side somewhere in there. I’ve seen it with Santana, and I’ve seen it when you think I’m not looking and you’re staring at Diesel. Hell, I even saw a glimpse of it the other night.” I swallow, remembering the night he had me against the wall. “Outside.”
Memories of his mouth on me make my body shiver before I can squash them down. His eyes travel over me, noticing.
“Stop analyzing me, and understand this is what I am.”
“You’re wrong.”
“Fuck it, Jaylah.”
“You are,” I cry. “I’ve seen it, I’ve seen the way you look—”
Suddenly I’m being lifted and launched through the air. I land on the couch perfectly, my ass to the cushion, my back resting upright. Mack comes down over me quickly, his hands on the cushion beside my head. In a sense he’s straddling me, only he’s still standing.
He brings his face down to mine. “When are you goin’ to get it?” he growls.
“I won’t,” I say, my voice breathy. “Because I know you’re better than this.”
“If I wanted a counselor,” he bites out, “I would have gotten one of them instead.”
The look in his eyes is challenging, and mine is equally so. “Well, you got me, and you’re going to have to just deal with it. I’ve seen something in you, and I’m not letting it go. I felt it the other night when . . .”
His eyes grow lusty. “What you felt out there was my tongue in your sweet-ass pussy. It was nothin’ more.”
I gasp. “You’re a bad liar.”
“No need to lie.”
“You have every need to lie,” I breathe.
“You need to quit lookin’ at me like that, and on top of that, you need to quit fuckin’ interfering in my life. You’re a nanny; that’s it.”
Oh God, he’s so close I can smell him. I no longer care about the conversation, or making him feel, or how rude he was. All I want right now is to taste his lips, maybe this time to taste him. My body jerks at that thought, and he notices and his eyes go molten. I’m not shy when it comes to sex. I’ve always been quite active in the bedroom, and this is no exception. I can see it in Mack’s eyes—I know what he wants and he knows, he God damned knows, I want it too.
The front door opens, and we both turn to see Mack striding in. Shit, it’s not six o’clock. What the hell is he doing here? His eyes flick to Tracy and his face gets hard.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
“Mack,” I warn.
He ignores me. “Well?”
Tracy hands Diesel to me, standing. “I just wanted to visit my nephew.”
“After you dropped him off and ran?” Mack bites.
“Mack!” I cry.
“I’m sorry, Miakoda. I just wanted to see him.”
“Don’t call me that, and don’t you think it’s up to me if you see him?”
“Mack!” I yell now, and Diesel starts to cry.
We all look to him, and in an angry whisper, I say, “Well done.”
He glares at me, and storms past. I walk over and touch Tracy’s shoulder. “I’m so sorry.”
She’s got tears in her eyes and it breaks my heart.
“Give me your number. I’ll meet you sometime when I’m out, and you can see Diesel again,” I whisper.
She nods, a tear rolling down her cheek, and writes down her number. I tuck it in my pocket and hug her. She’s frozen for a moment, but soon she’s responding, wrapping her arms around me. I hold her there for a long moment, and she kisses Diesel’s head before letting me go. “Take care of both of them, Jaylah,” she says, so low I almost can’t hear her. “He needs someone to push him. If you don’t, he’ll never discover how amazing Diesel can be for him.” Then she pulls back and leaves without another word. I’m scared and honored that she thinks I’m the one who can do that for them.
I turn to Mack. He’s in the kitchen, clanking things around. Clearly, now isn’t a good time.
I ignore him as I prepare a bottle for Diesel. I feed it to him in silence, and watch as Mack storms around. Boy, is he angry. After feeding Diesel, I start organizing his bath.
I’m not talking to Mack until he calms down, so when the bath is done, I busy myself spending time with Diesel. I play with him, cuddle him, and when six rolls around, I tuck him into bed.
“Things will get better, little man. I promise.”
I stroke my fingers over his soft cheek and then go to face the dragon.
When I get into the kitchen, Mack is standing with a beer in his hand, staring at nothing. It’s now or never.
“Want to tell me what that was all about?” I ask.
“No,” he says, brushing past me and heading towards the couch.
God, this man is difficult. I follow him, and before thinking, I say, “She told me about Ingrid.”
His body flinches and he turns, giving me a hard stare.
“And?”
And? Seriously?
“Mack, come on. You can’t treat everyone like you treated her, or you’ll have no one left.”
“Maybe,” he growls, stepping close, “that’s what I want.”
“No, it’s not.”
He gives me a horrified expression. “And you know me so well, do you?”
“I know enough. I know there’s a sweet-as-hell side somewhere in there. I’ve seen it with Santana, and I’ve seen it when you think I’m not looking and you’re staring at Diesel. Hell, I even saw a glimpse of it the other night.” I swallow, remembering the night he had me against the wall. “Outside.”
Memories of his mouth on me make my body shiver before I can squash them down. His eyes travel over me, noticing.
“Stop analyzing me, and understand this is what I am.”
“You’re wrong.”
“Fuck it, Jaylah.”
“You are,” I cry. “I’ve seen it, I’ve seen the way you look—”
Suddenly I’m being lifted and launched through the air. I land on the couch perfectly, my ass to the cushion, my back resting upright. Mack comes down over me quickly, his hands on the cushion beside my head. In a sense he’s straddling me, only he’s still standing.
He brings his face down to mine. “When are you goin’ to get it?” he growls.
“I won’t,” I say, my voice breathy. “Because I know you’re better than this.”
“If I wanted a counselor,” he bites out, “I would have gotten one of them instead.”
The look in his eyes is challenging, and mine is equally so. “Well, you got me, and you’re going to have to just deal with it. I’ve seen something in you, and I’m not letting it go. I felt it the other night when . . .”
His eyes grow lusty. “What you felt out there was my tongue in your sweet-ass pussy. It was nothin’ more.”
I gasp. “You’re a bad liar.”
“No need to lie.”
“You have every need to lie,” I breathe.
“You need to quit lookin’ at me like that, and on top of that, you need to quit fuckin’ interfering in my life. You’re a nanny; that’s it.”
Oh God, he’s so close I can smell him. I no longer care about the conversation, or making him feel, or how rude he was. All I want right now is to taste his lips, maybe this time to taste him. My body jerks at that thought, and he notices and his eyes go molten. I’m not shy when it comes to sex. I’ve always been quite active in the bedroom, and this is no exception. I can see it in Mack’s eyes—I know what he wants and he knows, he God damned knows, I want it too.
