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Anguish

Page 69

   


“Yeah,” I say. “But he’s coming good now.”
“You know he saved me?” Santana says, her eyes going soft.
“He did?” I ask.
“Yep. I was in a bad way when Maddox saved me.” Her eyes go to Pippa’s and they share a soft look. “It had been three months and I wasn’t moving from the bed, just wallowing. He came in, and he offered to shoot me.”
We all gasp.
She laughs. “I know, it sounds bad, but I wanted to die. I thought Pippa was dead, and I didn’t think I could go on. He made me get out of the bed, and he held the gun up. He said he’d shoot me, if that were really what I wanted. He said other things, things about Pippa and letting her down. It scared him; it scared me, but he snapped my brain into a good place. He saved me.”
“Do you think he would have shot you?” I whisper.
“If I really, truly wanted to die? Yes.”
“Oh my God,” Pippa breathes.
Santana reaches over and takes her hand. “But the thing was, I didn’t really want to die and he knew it. From that day forward, things picked up for me.”
We all grin, and tears well up in my eyes. I have a good one. He might be hard, occasionally stubborn, but he’s got an amazing heart.
“I think I love him even more,” I breathe.
“Oh, honey.” Santana laughs. “That’s totally not possible! He’s made it all the way.”
~*~*~*~
Mack’s fingers run down my cheek as he pulls me closer. “You ready, honey?”
I nod, staring at him, blinking back my tears even though I don’t know what he’s done. He gives me his soft, melted chocolate eyes and I want to fold into him. He glances at everyone who is watching, then turns his eyes back to me while pulling out some papers he had tucked in his jeans.
“You know how much I want you in my life, Lah.” He grins, and I giggle softly. “You’re sassy, you’re crazy, and you drive me nuts. Through all that, you love my son like he’s your own, and you give me the family I never had. I’ve been fightin’ for it my entire life, even with Ingrid, but I could never reach it. Now, I’ve reached it.”
He hands the papers to me and I stare at them, confused. “What are these?”
“These are kind of adoption papers.”
My heart goes to liquid and I suck in a breath.
“Diesel is my son, but he needs a momma, and the best one he can have is you. You sign these, baby, and you become that.”
I choke back a sob as I stare down at the legal papers that will make me one of Diesel’s legal guardians. Tears burn under my eyelids as I stare at them.
“We need you,” Mack says into my ear. “He needs you.”
He needs me. They need me. Oh, God. He wants me to be Diesel’s mother. I turn and stare at the gorgeous baby that’s in Maddox’s arms and I know, I’ve known from the minute I met him that he’s meant to be with me. I love him like he’s my own, and nothing, nothing in this entire world would make me happier than making that real.
I turn back to Mack, and the tears flow over, pouring down my cheeks. “You want me to be his momma?”
He smiles, stroking my cheek. “Fuckin’ hell yes I do.”
“And you want us to be a family?”
He steps closer, wrapping his hand behind my neck. “Never had somethin’ that was all mine and real. You’re real, and you’re all mine. Diesel is ours, and he’s our fuckin’ glue. I want it all, and I don’t wanna wait a second more. Marriage, that binds us, but this . . .this binds us all. This makes us one. This makes us a family.”
I cry happy tears as I lean down, taking the pen from his hand and signing the forms. A loud, happy cry leaves my lips when I’m done, and I turn to Maddox. He hands Diesel to me and I pull him into my arms. “I’m your momma now, little man. I swear I’ll do the best I can, and we’ll always be together.”
Mack wraps his arms around me, burying his face into my neck and breathing me in. I hear Santana sob, but I don’t turn to look at her. I look at my family, and my heart swells. Diesel, Mack and I. Just the three of us, all from difficult situations, all of us needing someone. Together, we’ve given each other exactly what we each need. I reach up, cupping Mack’s jaw, and whisper, “I love you, Miakoda.”
He grins down at me. “Same here, baby, right from the depths of my soul.”
“Shit,” Ash croaks. “I’m going to lose it.”
“Suck it in, woman,” Krypt whispers.
At that, I burst out laughing, and turn to face the rest of my family.
“Does this mean I’m an Old Lady?”
Mack grins, Maddox winks, and Krypt crosses his arms, smiling.
“Fuck yeah it does,” Mack growls, wrapping an arm around me. I stare up at him, smiling, happier then I’ve ever been in my life. He dips his head low, and murmurs in a husky, sexy voice, “Welcome to the Joker’s Wrath Motorcycle Club, honey.”
That’s what I call home.
THE END