Any Time, Any Place
Page 67
The energy swirled between them, growing stronger and fiercer, but he never took his gaze from hers, giving her the gift of his own release, his naked face twisting in ecstasy, and she drank in every expression with a greediness that shocked her.
Never had lovemaking been this personal, this intimate. Skin to skin, his cock deep within her, his mouth pressed to hers, they let go and joined together.
The drift back to earth was slow, like a mystical flight from another world. She lay in his arms, knowing her life had completely changed and her path was unknown.
“I think I love you,” she whispered.
“I think I love you, too.”
She smiled, blinking back the sting of tears. “I have to tell you something, Dalton. Something I’ve kept from you but don’t want to hide anymore.”
His arms tightened around her. He propped himself up on his elbow to look into her face. “You can tell me anything.”
She took a deep breath. “There’s something you don’t know about me. About who I am. My father’s name was Matthew Hawthorne.”
He blinked. She watched a variety of expressions flicker over his face as the name jogged his memory. “Did I know your father? I know that name, why can’t I—”
“My full name is Raven Bella Hawthorne. I was only nineteen when he died in a car crash.”
Slowly, recognition seeped into his eyes. Heart pounding, she remained calm as he jerked back, shock slowly replacing the warm love she’d seen a few moments ago. “Wait a minute. The car crash. The name. Your father.”
She swallowed and told the rest. “Yes. My father was with your mother when they died in the crash. They were running away together.”
It took him a while to process. She waited, naked, in his bed, and hoped he’d let her explain. “Wait a minute. How long have you known about this?”
His voice was so cold, as if he were speaking with a stranger and not someone he’d just held like a precious gift. She pressed the sheet to her bare breasts and sat up. Oh, how she wanted to lie.
But she couldn’t.
“I’ve known for the last year. Since the first time you came into my bar with your brothers.”
Dalton got up from the bed. Refusing to look at her, he tugged his jeans on. She flung out words, desperate for him to understand. “Dalton, please listen to me. At first, I was in shock and angry when I found out who you were. I was going to tell you to never come back. For years I’ve been bitter and resentful over how my father died. I was young when I lost him, and I blamed your mother. I never knew what really happened and why he would’ve left.”
“And you thought I had more information,” he said tonelessly. “That’s why you started finally talking to me. That’s why you allowed me to do the work on the bar.”
She nodded, miserable. “Yes, I’m not going to lie about that. You kept asking me out, and I thought I might be able to learn some crucial pieces to this puzzle that’s haunted me for the last eight years.”
He shook his head and laughed humorlessly. “And you think I know more about the accident than you? You don’t think I’ve had my own shit storm to get through, knowing my mother was manipulated by your father to run off with him?”
“It wasn’t like that,” she said hotly. “This whole time, I thought your mother seduced him! But I think we’re both terribly wrong, Dalton. This was more than a casual hookup or impulsive decision. I also know my father never would’ve left me for good. From what you’ve told me about your mother, it’s the same way. I think there’s much more to this story that we haven’t figured out.”
He rubbed his hands over his forehead, cursing viciously under his breath. “That would be convenient for you, wouldn’t it? You’d feel better about lying to me and realizing your father broke up a marriage and a family.”
“I’m not going to start trading insults about our parents,” she said softly. “Aren’t you tired of living your life blaming someone who won’t ever be able to give you answers? I’m tired. Tired of the nightmares, and anger, and hate. Don’t you realize you taught me there’s so much more for us? We don’t have to let our parents’ past dictate our future. Yes, I started off wanting more information, but every day I spent with you, I fell deeper and deeper. Nothing between us was a lie, Dalton. I fell in love with you.”
He just stared at her. She shifted under the sheets, almost wishing he’d be angry. Yelling would be so much better than this icy silence and calculating gaze as he assessed her. “Let me make sure I’ve got your story straight now,” he said, his tone mocking. “You decide to do an undercover operation and spend time with me to gain knowledge about my mother. You try to gather information from my brothers and my family, using me and my interest in you as bait. Were you willing to sleep with me for it?”
She raised her chin, ignoring the cold, hard piece of ice lodged in her gut. He had every right to be angry and cruel. She owed him the truth with no excuses. “No, sleeping with you was never in the plan. You got the job for the bar because you asked for it and were the best. I decided the time we spent together could be useful.”
“Useful. I like that word.” His gaze flicked over her in disgust. “What were you going to do when you confirmed my mother was a lying, conniving bitch?”
She flinched. “At first, I wanted to restore my father’s reputation. After the accident, your family ruined his name, spreading cruel rumors about him seducing and killing your mother. I was destroyed. I had no money or family name, like you did, and couldn’t fight back. That’s why I ran away all those years, to find myself and heal. I’d always wanted to get revenge by discovering the truth, proving my father was taken advantage of.”
“But now you don’t believe that.”
“No, I don’t. I think they were in love. I think there were other things between them we don’t know about, but that neither of them wanted to hurt anyone.”
“How generous of you to forgive them both. When did you decide your spy games were officially over? Last week? Tonight? A few moments ago?”
“The night of the break-in,” she said quietly. “I realized there was much more between us, and I didn’t want to sacrifice it for some strange sense of justified satisfaction. I wanted to get to know who you were, separate from your mother. And I did. Dalton, there were never any lies between us in bed, or with my emotions. I planned to tell you.”
Never had lovemaking been this personal, this intimate. Skin to skin, his cock deep within her, his mouth pressed to hers, they let go and joined together.
The drift back to earth was slow, like a mystical flight from another world. She lay in his arms, knowing her life had completely changed and her path was unknown.
“I think I love you,” she whispered.
“I think I love you, too.”
She smiled, blinking back the sting of tears. “I have to tell you something, Dalton. Something I’ve kept from you but don’t want to hide anymore.”
His arms tightened around her. He propped himself up on his elbow to look into her face. “You can tell me anything.”
She took a deep breath. “There’s something you don’t know about me. About who I am. My father’s name was Matthew Hawthorne.”
He blinked. She watched a variety of expressions flicker over his face as the name jogged his memory. “Did I know your father? I know that name, why can’t I—”
“My full name is Raven Bella Hawthorne. I was only nineteen when he died in a car crash.”
Slowly, recognition seeped into his eyes. Heart pounding, she remained calm as he jerked back, shock slowly replacing the warm love she’d seen a few moments ago. “Wait a minute. The car crash. The name. Your father.”
She swallowed and told the rest. “Yes. My father was with your mother when they died in the crash. They were running away together.”
It took him a while to process. She waited, naked, in his bed, and hoped he’d let her explain. “Wait a minute. How long have you known about this?”
His voice was so cold, as if he were speaking with a stranger and not someone he’d just held like a precious gift. She pressed the sheet to her bare breasts and sat up. Oh, how she wanted to lie.
But she couldn’t.
“I’ve known for the last year. Since the first time you came into my bar with your brothers.”
Dalton got up from the bed. Refusing to look at her, he tugged his jeans on. She flung out words, desperate for him to understand. “Dalton, please listen to me. At first, I was in shock and angry when I found out who you were. I was going to tell you to never come back. For years I’ve been bitter and resentful over how my father died. I was young when I lost him, and I blamed your mother. I never knew what really happened and why he would’ve left.”
“And you thought I had more information,” he said tonelessly. “That’s why you started finally talking to me. That’s why you allowed me to do the work on the bar.”
She nodded, miserable. “Yes, I’m not going to lie about that. You kept asking me out, and I thought I might be able to learn some crucial pieces to this puzzle that’s haunted me for the last eight years.”
He shook his head and laughed humorlessly. “And you think I know more about the accident than you? You don’t think I’ve had my own shit storm to get through, knowing my mother was manipulated by your father to run off with him?”
“It wasn’t like that,” she said hotly. “This whole time, I thought your mother seduced him! But I think we’re both terribly wrong, Dalton. This was more than a casual hookup or impulsive decision. I also know my father never would’ve left me for good. From what you’ve told me about your mother, it’s the same way. I think there’s much more to this story that we haven’t figured out.”
He rubbed his hands over his forehead, cursing viciously under his breath. “That would be convenient for you, wouldn’t it? You’d feel better about lying to me and realizing your father broke up a marriage and a family.”
“I’m not going to start trading insults about our parents,” she said softly. “Aren’t you tired of living your life blaming someone who won’t ever be able to give you answers? I’m tired. Tired of the nightmares, and anger, and hate. Don’t you realize you taught me there’s so much more for us? We don’t have to let our parents’ past dictate our future. Yes, I started off wanting more information, but every day I spent with you, I fell deeper and deeper. Nothing between us was a lie, Dalton. I fell in love with you.”
He just stared at her. She shifted under the sheets, almost wishing he’d be angry. Yelling would be so much better than this icy silence and calculating gaze as he assessed her. “Let me make sure I’ve got your story straight now,” he said, his tone mocking. “You decide to do an undercover operation and spend time with me to gain knowledge about my mother. You try to gather information from my brothers and my family, using me and my interest in you as bait. Were you willing to sleep with me for it?”
She raised her chin, ignoring the cold, hard piece of ice lodged in her gut. He had every right to be angry and cruel. She owed him the truth with no excuses. “No, sleeping with you was never in the plan. You got the job for the bar because you asked for it and were the best. I decided the time we spent together could be useful.”
“Useful. I like that word.” His gaze flicked over her in disgust. “What were you going to do when you confirmed my mother was a lying, conniving bitch?”
She flinched. “At first, I wanted to restore my father’s reputation. After the accident, your family ruined his name, spreading cruel rumors about him seducing and killing your mother. I was destroyed. I had no money or family name, like you did, and couldn’t fight back. That’s why I ran away all those years, to find myself and heal. I’d always wanted to get revenge by discovering the truth, proving my father was taken advantage of.”
“But now you don’t believe that.”
“No, I don’t. I think they were in love. I think there were other things between them we don’t know about, but that neither of them wanted to hurt anyone.”
“How generous of you to forgive them both. When did you decide your spy games were officially over? Last week? Tonight? A few moments ago?”
“The night of the break-in,” she said quietly. “I realized there was much more between us, and I didn’t want to sacrifice it for some strange sense of justified satisfaction. I wanted to get to know who you were, separate from your mother. And I did. Dalton, there were never any lies between us in bed, or with my emotions. I planned to tell you.”
