Ashes to Ashes
Page 60
“Reeve,” I whisper. I touch his face. He grabs my hand, holds it tight in his.
“I know why you can’t be with me now. What I did, what people here think of me. I get it. But school’s almost over and in a couple of months, we’ll both be off Jar Island. I’m still going to Graydon in the fall. I’ll be an hour away from BC. I’m not giving up on you. On us.” And then he’s pulling me against him, and his mouth is on mine, and I’m kissing him back. I can’t not be kissing him back. The smell of him, the way he tastes, I’m drowning in it and how right it feels. How good.
Between kisses, he says, “Please. Please find a way to forgive me for what I did. I love you. I love you so much, Lillia.”
It wakes me up.
Mary.
I push him away, my fingers fly to my lips. Oh my God. What have I done? “Don’t ever say that to me,” I gasp.
“Cho, wait—” His arms are reaching for me.
“Don’t ever come near me again.” I turn tail and run, run as fast as I can away from the party, to Alex’s pool house.
I can’t be near Reeve. It’s too dangerous. I won’t go back to school, it’s pretty much over for the seniors anyway. Or . . . or I’ll go to Boston, stay in our family apartment until Reeve leaves for training. Whatever it takes to not be near him.
My purse. I need my purse.
I race into the pool house. I stashed my purse and my coat in Alex’s closet for safekeeping. Outside the sliding glass doors, the music is blasting, and I hear the rest of our senior class shouting and clapping along to the music. Flashing lights from the DJ booth speckle the floor.
I slip out the door and hurry down the path, toward the front of Alex’s house. I’m searching for my car keys when I remember that Alex drove us here. Maybe I’ll call my mom to come and pick me up.
No. What if Reeve tries to find me?
I’ll just walk home.
I’m about to pass through the fence gate when I slam into Alex. Alarmed, he says, “Lil, what’s wrong?”
“I have to get out of here right now.” I’m shaking. “I’m sorry.” I try to push past him and get on the other side of the fence, where the valet guys are all sitting on the hoods of the parked cars lining Alex’s driveway and street.
But Alex won’t let me go. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. What’s going on? Did something happen with Reeve?”
I start to cry. “I don’t want to be near him, Alex. It’s just too much. He makes it so hard for me. He’s outside my house, he’s drunk at the banquet screaming things, he’s telling me he loves me and that he’s never going to let me go. I—I can’t breathe.” I’m gulping for air. Every single day since I made that promise to Mary has been a struggle. How can I live like this? Pushing away the boy I love forever. “Alex, I can’t breathe.”
Alex puts his hands on my shoulders. “It’s okay. It’s okay. Try to take deep breaths, Lil.”
I breathe deep. Raggedly I say, “He won’t let me go. How am I supposed to do this if he won’t let me go?”
Alex’s face changes, and I look over my shoulder. Reeve is standing behind us, valet ticket in his hand, white-faced and wretched. “I’ll never bother you again,” he manages. “You don’t have to worry anymore.” And then he’s gone.
“Oh no,” I whisper. “No, no, no.”
I’m about to run after him when Alex steps in front of me. “Lil, this is just what he wants, to pull you back into his drama. He’s sick. You can’t help him.”
“Alex, you don’t understand.” I’m practically screaming in his face. “It’s not just Reeve. There are other people involved.”
“Lillia! Calm down! Let’s go get Kat. Talk to her.”
Kat.
The spell.
I don’t say anything. I just turn and run back toward prom.
Chapter Sixty-Two
MARY
I’M ON THE BEDROOM FLOOR, just staring off into space, when my bedroom door suddenly swings open. I run toward it and stare down the hall.
Are Kat and Lillia back here to do something else to me? I can’t let them catch me off guard again. I was so close to getting Reeve, so close to being free of this place. And again my supposed friends chose his life over mine.
As I walk out of my room and downstairs, I see the strings tied around the doorknobs, the salt on the floor.
It’s all perfectly done.
I know exactly the spell they used on me. They had to sacrifice two things they loved. I don’t know what Kat’s was, but I do see blood on the floor from her dog, Shep. She did give up something, unintentionally anyway.
There’s a necklace hanging from the front doorknob. I pick it up and immediately recognize it. The necklace Reeve gave her during spring break.
So she gave Reeve up to bind me. How poetic.
One of them must have gone back on their sacrifice if I’m free. There’s no doubt in my mind who I have to thank.
Kat and Lillia are dangerous. They know my secret, and worse, they now know how to control me. I can’t let them do that again. I won’t be bound here for all eternity. I’m leaving. Tonight. Before they know I’m even gone.
I close my eyes and try to feel him, find him.
Chapter Sixty-Three
KAT
I SPEND PROM THINKING A lot about dead people, even though I dance ten songs straight with Ashlin. The girl can dance; I’ll say that for her.
I think about Rennie and if she’s watching us. I can imagine her gagging over some of the uglier dresses and the one girl who’s wearing a freaking tiara. And I’m sure she thinks the jumpy castle is immature. Which, okay, yeah. I hear that. But a jumpy castle is also as fun as hell, and there’s been a line to get in it all night long.
Maybe it’s just me being sentimental, but I honestly believe that if Rennie were still alive, I could have sold her on the idea of ditching the Boston club to have prom here. She definitely had a rebellious streak in her. She liked shaking things up.
I think about my mom. I hope she thinks I look beautiful in my fancy dress. If she is somewhere out there, I know I’ve made her proud. A bunch of people have grabbed my arm tonight, kids from different social groups, thanking me. She would have loved that everyone was invited. That nobody was left out because they didn’t have the money.
And, of course, I think about Mary. Every girl with long blond hair makes my heart skip, but it’s never her, thank God. Our spell worked. She’s trapped in her house. But it makes me sad that we’re all here having the time of our lives when Mary should be with us. Not Mary as she is now, but as she used to be. She should be alive. I wish she were alive.
“I know why you can’t be with me now. What I did, what people here think of me. I get it. But school’s almost over and in a couple of months, we’ll both be off Jar Island. I’m still going to Graydon in the fall. I’ll be an hour away from BC. I’m not giving up on you. On us.” And then he’s pulling me against him, and his mouth is on mine, and I’m kissing him back. I can’t not be kissing him back. The smell of him, the way he tastes, I’m drowning in it and how right it feels. How good.
Between kisses, he says, “Please. Please find a way to forgive me for what I did. I love you. I love you so much, Lillia.”
It wakes me up.
Mary.
I push him away, my fingers fly to my lips. Oh my God. What have I done? “Don’t ever say that to me,” I gasp.
“Cho, wait—” His arms are reaching for me.
“Don’t ever come near me again.” I turn tail and run, run as fast as I can away from the party, to Alex’s pool house.
I can’t be near Reeve. It’s too dangerous. I won’t go back to school, it’s pretty much over for the seniors anyway. Or . . . or I’ll go to Boston, stay in our family apartment until Reeve leaves for training. Whatever it takes to not be near him.
My purse. I need my purse.
I race into the pool house. I stashed my purse and my coat in Alex’s closet for safekeeping. Outside the sliding glass doors, the music is blasting, and I hear the rest of our senior class shouting and clapping along to the music. Flashing lights from the DJ booth speckle the floor.
I slip out the door and hurry down the path, toward the front of Alex’s house. I’m searching for my car keys when I remember that Alex drove us here. Maybe I’ll call my mom to come and pick me up.
No. What if Reeve tries to find me?
I’ll just walk home.
I’m about to pass through the fence gate when I slam into Alex. Alarmed, he says, “Lil, what’s wrong?”
“I have to get out of here right now.” I’m shaking. “I’m sorry.” I try to push past him and get on the other side of the fence, where the valet guys are all sitting on the hoods of the parked cars lining Alex’s driveway and street.
But Alex won’t let me go. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. What’s going on? Did something happen with Reeve?”
I start to cry. “I don’t want to be near him, Alex. It’s just too much. He makes it so hard for me. He’s outside my house, he’s drunk at the banquet screaming things, he’s telling me he loves me and that he’s never going to let me go. I—I can’t breathe.” I’m gulping for air. Every single day since I made that promise to Mary has been a struggle. How can I live like this? Pushing away the boy I love forever. “Alex, I can’t breathe.”
Alex puts his hands on my shoulders. “It’s okay. It’s okay. Try to take deep breaths, Lil.”
I breathe deep. Raggedly I say, “He won’t let me go. How am I supposed to do this if he won’t let me go?”
Alex’s face changes, and I look over my shoulder. Reeve is standing behind us, valet ticket in his hand, white-faced and wretched. “I’ll never bother you again,” he manages. “You don’t have to worry anymore.” And then he’s gone.
“Oh no,” I whisper. “No, no, no.”
I’m about to run after him when Alex steps in front of me. “Lil, this is just what he wants, to pull you back into his drama. He’s sick. You can’t help him.”
“Alex, you don’t understand.” I’m practically screaming in his face. “It’s not just Reeve. There are other people involved.”
“Lillia! Calm down! Let’s go get Kat. Talk to her.”
Kat.
The spell.
I don’t say anything. I just turn and run back toward prom.
Chapter Sixty-Two
MARY
I’M ON THE BEDROOM FLOOR, just staring off into space, when my bedroom door suddenly swings open. I run toward it and stare down the hall.
Are Kat and Lillia back here to do something else to me? I can’t let them catch me off guard again. I was so close to getting Reeve, so close to being free of this place. And again my supposed friends chose his life over mine.
As I walk out of my room and downstairs, I see the strings tied around the doorknobs, the salt on the floor.
It’s all perfectly done.
I know exactly the spell they used on me. They had to sacrifice two things they loved. I don’t know what Kat’s was, but I do see blood on the floor from her dog, Shep. She did give up something, unintentionally anyway.
There’s a necklace hanging from the front doorknob. I pick it up and immediately recognize it. The necklace Reeve gave her during spring break.
So she gave Reeve up to bind me. How poetic.
One of them must have gone back on their sacrifice if I’m free. There’s no doubt in my mind who I have to thank.
Kat and Lillia are dangerous. They know my secret, and worse, they now know how to control me. I can’t let them do that again. I won’t be bound here for all eternity. I’m leaving. Tonight. Before they know I’m even gone.
I close my eyes and try to feel him, find him.
Chapter Sixty-Three
KAT
I SPEND PROM THINKING A lot about dead people, even though I dance ten songs straight with Ashlin. The girl can dance; I’ll say that for her.
I think about Rennie and if she’s watching us. I can imagine her gagging over some of the uglier dresses and the one girl who’s wearing a freaking tiara. And I’m sure she thinks the jumpy castle is immature. Which, okay, yeah. I hear that. But a jumpy castle is also as fun as hell, and there’s been a line to get in it all night long.
Maybe it’s just me being sentimental, but I honestly believe that if Rennie were still alive, I could have sold her on the idea of ditching the Boston club to have prom here. She definitely had a rebellious streak in her. She liked shaking things up.
I think about my mom. I hope she thinks I look beautiful in my fancy dress. If she is somewhere out there, I know I’ve made her proud. A bunch of people have grabbed my arm tonight, kids from different social groups, thanking me. She would have loved that everyone was invited. That nobody was left out because they didn’t have the money.
And, of course, I think about Mary. Every girl with long blond hair makes my heart skip, but it’s never her, thank God. Our spell worked. She’s trapped in her house. But it makes me sad that we’re all here having the time of our lives when Mary should be with us. Not Mary as she is now, but as she used to be. She should be alive. I wish she were alive.
