Bare It All
Page 63
Surprised again, Reese held still...for three beats of time. Then he gathered her close. “Convince me I haven’t been used.”
“I can’t.” She tilted her head back to see him and gave him the truth he claimed to want. “I did use you. After what happened today, I was so shaken I didn’t know what to do. I felt like crying, or shouting, or just curling up tight and hiding somewhere. I haven’t felt like that for a while now. But then I realized you’d be home soon, and instead of falling apart, I wanted to get closer to you. I...” She pressed her cheek to his chest. “I wanted you to make me feel better.”
Broad, warm hands coasted up and down her back. She felt the beat of his heart against her cheek, the expansion of his hard chest as he drew in slow, deep breaths. “And did I?”
Alice nodded. “I was going to tell you everything. Rowdy insisted. I knew if I didn’t, he would.”
Reese stiffened. “And if Rowdy hadn’t been involved?”
“I’m sorry, but I honestly don’t know. You’re a cop,” she said quickly, hoping he’d understand. “You naturally feel an obligation to do things the legal way.”
“That’s not a bad thing, honey. The legal way works when you let it.”
“No, it doesn’t, not always.” Time to stop stalling. Alice gave up the comfort of his big solid body, but as she stepped away, Reese caught her hand.
She saw the questions in his eyes, the doubt he still felt about her motives. She couldn’t blame him.
“Let’s sit down.” She gave him a gentle tug toward the couch. “It’s a long story.”
“Rowdy told me much of it.”
Rowdy knew only the tiniest bit. Alice waited until they were both seated. As usual, Cash rushed over to sit with them. She patted her thighs, and he climbed into her lap, rolling to his back so he could stretch his head out to Reese’s thigh.
Smiling, Alice scratched his belly—and avoided looking at Reese. “Today, I saved a woman.”
Reese said nothing.
“Even if it upsets you, I feel good about it.” A quick glance showed the seriousness of his expression, both somber and acutely focused. “There were so many times I prayed for someone to save me.”
“Someone did.” Reese rubbed under Cash’s chin. “Rowdy says the guy is a wraith, but that he has incredible influence with the law.”
In doggy heaven, Cash dozed off.
Alice loved the dog with all her heart.
She realized now that she loved Reese, too, and that was a whole lot trickier. It meant she couldn’t hide anymore. He’d have to know the truth.
And she’d have to accept the consequences.
“It surprises me, the things Rowdy can uncover.” She licked dry lips. “He didn’t get a name? Any details?”
“No.” Scooping up the dog, Reese moved him to his opposite side so that he could sit nearer to Alice. With two pats, he resettled Cash, who was just as content to doze nearby.
Reese turned to her with all his considerable concentration. “I’m hoping you’ll share those with me.”
She would tell him what she could and hope it was enough, but not too much.
Stretching out one arm along the back of the couch, Reese more or less caged her in. “Logan also did some checking for me.”
Wow, he’d been busy. Surveillance of her shopping trip, background checks on her past. Did all that curiosity mean that Reese cared—or that he suspected her of something?
Trying to sound curious instead of wary, Alice asked, “Did Logan uncover anything?”
“A little.”
Her heart beat faster. She wished he hadn’t moved Cash; being near the dog helped relax her. “For instance...?”
“I know what you told the cops when you were recovered, what you told the papers when you showed up again. And I know you have permits for your guns.” He stared at her a moment. “Now I want to know the rest. Who took you, how you got away, why you’re still so afraid—”
“I’m cautious, not afraid.” Liar. So many times, fear overtook her. “Not as much, anyway.”
He dismissed her protests. “And I want to know what happened today, and why.”
The why was easy. “That young lady needed my help.”
“No, Alice. There’s more to it than that. I think maybe you’re trying to make amends for something. I think you’re still hiding a lot. But it’s time to stop hiding.”
Alice closed her eyes. Reese had no idea—and she’d really wanted to keep it that way.
Touching her chin, he brought her face up, waiting until she opened her eyes. “It’s time to let me in, Alice.”
She nodded, but she couldn’t decide how to start. Fear. So much awful fear. “I don’t want things to change,” she finally admitted.
“Between us?”
“Yes.” Once he knew it all, how could he possibly still be interested?
“You have to tell me sooner or later.”
“I know.” Dread smothered her, tightened her chest and made her stomach churn. “I think I’ve known that since the day I met you.”
“Then let’s get it all out in the open and deal with the consequences. The longer you wait, the harder it’s going to be.”
Knowing he was right, Alice fell back on an old tactic, forcing herself to relax her muscles, to compose her expression.
“I can’t.” She tilted her head back to see him and gave him the truth he claimed to want. “I did use you. After what happened today, I was so shaken I didn’t know what to do. I felt like crying, or shouting, or just curling up tight and hiding somewhere. I haven’t felt like that for a while now. But then I realized you’d be home soon, and instead of falling apart, I wanted to get closer to you. I...” She pressed her cheek to his chest. “I wanted you to make me feel better.”
Broad, warm hands coasted up and down her back. She felt the beat of his heart against her cheek, the expansion of his hard chest as he drew in slow, deep breaths. “And did I?”
Alice nodded. “I was going to tell you everything. Rowdy insisted. I knew if I didn’t, he would.”
Reese stiffened. “And if Rowdy hadn’t been involved?”
“I’m sorry, but I honestly don’t know. You’re a cop,” she said quickly, hoping he’d understand. “You naturally feel an obligation to do things the legal way.”
“That’s not a bad thing, honey. The legal way works when you let it.”
“No, it doesn’t, not always.” Time to stop stalling. Alice gave up the comfort of his big solid body, but as she stepped away, Reese caught her hand.
She saw the questions in his eyes, the doubt he still felt about her motives. She couldn’t blame him.
“Let’s sit down.” She gave him a gentle tug toward the couch. “It’s a long story.”
“Rowdy told me much of it.”
Rowdy knew only the tiniest bit. Alice waited until they were both seated. As usual, Cash rushed over to sit with them. She patted her thighs, and he climbed into her lap, rolling to his back so he could stretch his head out to Reese’s thigh.
Smiling, Alice scratched his belly—and avoided looking at Reese. “Today, I saved a woman.”
Reese said nothing.
“Even if it upsets you, I feel good about it.” A quick glance showed the seriousness of his expression, both somber and acutely focused. “There were so many times I prayed for someone to save me.”
“Someone did.” Reese rubbed under Cash’s chin. “Rowdy says the guy is a wraith, but that he has incredible influence with the law.”
In doggy heaven, Cash dozed off.
Alice loved the dog with all her heart.
She realized now that she loved Reese, too, and that was a whole lot trickier. It meant she couldn’t hide anymore. He’d have to know the truth.
And she’d have to accept the consequences.
“It surprises me, the things Rowdy can uncover.” She licked dry lips. “He didn’t get a name? Any details?”
“No.” Scooping up the dog, Reese moved him to his opposite side so that he could sit nearer to Alice. With two pats, he resettled Cash, who was just as content to doze nearby.
Reese turned to her with all his considerable concentration. “I’m hoping you’ll share those with me.”
She would tell him what she could and hope it was enough, but not too much.
Stretching out one arm along the back of the couch, Reese more or less caged her in. “Logan also did some checking for me.”
Wow, he’d been busy. Surveillance of her shopping trip, background checks on her past. Did all that curiosity mean that Reese cared—or that he suspected her of something?
Trying to sound curious instead of wary, Alice asked, “Did Logan uncover anything?”
“A little.”
Her heart beat faster. She wished he hadn’t moved Cash; being near the dog helped relax her. “For instance...?”
“I know what you told the cops when you were recovered, what you told the papers when you showed up again. And I know you have permits for your guns.” He stared at her a moment. “Now I want to know the rest. Who took you, how you got away, why you’re still so afraid—”
“I’m cautious, not afraid.” Liar. So many times, fear overtook her. “Not as much, anyway.”
He dismissed her protests. “And I want to know what happened today, and why.”
The why was easy. “That young lady needed my help.”
“No, Alice. There’s more to it than that. I think maybe you’re trying to make amends for something. I think you’re still hiding a lot. But it’s time to stop hiding.”
Alice closed her eyes. Reese had no idea—and she’d really wanted to keep it that way.
Touching her chin, he brought her face up, waiting until she opened her eyes. “It’s time to let me in, Alice.”
She nodded, but she couldn’t decide how to start. Fear. So much awful fear. “I don’t want things to change,” she finally admitted.
“Between us?”
“Yes.” Once he knew it all, how could he possibly still be interested?
“You have to tell me sooner or later.”
“I know.” Dread smothered her, tightened her chest and made her stomach churn. “I think I’ve known that since the day I met you.”
“Then let’s get it all out in the open and deal with the consequences. The longer you wait, the harder it’s going to be.”
Knowing he was right, Alice fell back on an old tactic, forcing herself to relax her muscles, to compose her expression.
