Between the Devil and Desire
Page 44
“Were you a dutiful wife?” Before she could answer, he said, “My apologies. That question was uncalled for. Obviously when it comes to polite society, my conversational skills are lacking.”
“Based upon your reputation with women, I’d have thought you’d have exceptional conversational skills.”
“When I’m with women, my mouth is usually occupied with things other than talking.”
She blushed profusely. He didn’t know why he took pleasure in bringing the color to her cheeks. He’d like to do it with a great deal more than words. But she was an aristocratic lady, and he knew that simply touching one put a man in danger of having to take a trip down the aisle—a trip he had no plans to ever make. Besides, he wanted no claim on her. He wanted her married, so he could shuck off the responsibility of raising her son.
“You seemed very insistent you didn’t want to marry Briarwood.”
She looked down at her hands again. “If I should ever marry again, I would like very much for it to be my choice and my decision.”
Unfortunately, that attitude was going to cause a problem for Jack. It indicated a delayed process and he wanted her married very soon. “So if you could choose to marry anyone, who would he be?”
She looked up, startled. “I’d not given it any thought.”
“Oh, come now. Surely over the years, someone caught your fancy. At a dinner or during a ball. Perhaps you danced with him and thought you’d enjoy something more.”
“I was married.”
“I’m not suggesting you had an affair, because God knows you’d never do anything inappropriate, but thinking about it isn’t wrong. Surely you thought about it.”
“I did not, sir. Never.”
To his utter amazement, he realized she was speaking the truth. Never to fantasize about the forbidden? He couldn’t imagine it.
“All right, I’ll give you that you probably never thought about getting close to any other man, but surely you liked someone, found someone else pleasant to be around. I could arrange for him to visit you here so you could come to know him better—”
“I’m in mourning.”
“So you keep reminding me when it’s not necessary, Olivia. Quite honestly, it’s evident by your attire. You look ghastly in black, by the way. Have you anything in violet?”
She stammered out a few sounds. He raised his hand. “Never mind. We can address your clothing later. Here’s the thing. You don’t want me to be guardian of your son. I don’t want to be guardian. The simplest solution to both our problems is for you to marry. And I’m willing to help in any way I can. I’ll bring the suitors to you. Who do you fancy?”
“It would be entirely inappropriate for me to take male callers.”
“Of course, it’s inappropriate. That’s the reason we’ll do it discreetly.”
“When a woman is in mourning, she’s not to issue invitations.”
“You won’t. I will.”
She stood up. “I’m not sure why I bothered to try to make matters right between us.”
And he didn’t know why he kept trying to make them un-right. “Sit down.”
She hesitated.
“Please.”
With a nod, she sat. “Henry likes his dog very much.”
The change in topic startled but pleased him. “As well he should. Cost me a fortune.”
“So he told me.” She smiled, and again he was struck by how approachable it made her appear. If she were his, he thought he’d always seek to make her smile. “He wasn’t quite certain how to go about holding a confidence since you didn’t give him anything to actually hold.”
“That must have been an interesting conversation.”
“I daresay it was most enlightening.”
He should have taken more care about explaining things to the lad, not that he was particularly bothered his mother knew the truth of the situation. He just didn’t want it to get back to Chesney.
“How did you know?” she asked.
He finished chewing the remarkable lamb and swallowed. “Pardon?”
“Helen. Henry’s nanny. You were suspicious of her from the start. Henry told me she kept a stick in her pocket and would whack him on the hand if he displeased her. Those aren’t his precise words, of course, but they are the gist of what he confessed. How did you know she was frightening him?”
Something was shifting between them, something he wasn’t quite comfortable with. But he was also weary of the bickering. Until he could get her married off, they’d be living in this house together. Might as well do it amicably. “When I was very young, for a short time, I lived with someone who hurt me. While I was frightened I stammered. I’m certain people stammer for all sorts of reasons, so perhaps one thing had nothing to do with the other. Plus he is a boy, and they are not by nature so terribly well behaved.”
“What you said about Lovingdon earlier, about taking your task as guardian seriously—things between us might not have been quite so difficult had you voiced it to me sooner.”
“Quite honestly, Duchess, I’m not certain I realized it myself until I spoke the words. I’m as baffled as you by your husband’s choice of guardian, but I like this house and everything in it. I intend to keep them.”
“As long as you’re good to Henry, I shall strive to be more gracious.”
“Based upon your reputation with women, I’d have thought you’d have exceptional conversational skills.”
“When I’m with women, my mouth is usually occupied with things other than talking.”
She blushed profusely. He didn’t know why he took pleasure in bringing the color to her cheeks. He’d like to do it with a great deal more than words. But she was an aristocratic lady, and he knew that simply touching one put a man in danger of having to take a trip down the aisle—a trip he had no plans to ever make. Besides, he wanted no claim on her. He wanted her married, so he could shuck off the responsibility of raising her son.
“You seemed very insistent you didn’t want to marry Briarwood.”
She looked down at her hands again. “If I should ever marry again, I would like very much for it to be my choice and my decision.”
Unfortunately, that attitude was going to cause a problem for Jack. It indicated a delayed process and he wanted her married very soon. “So if you could choose to marry anyone, who would he be?”
She looked up, startled. “I’d not given it any thought.”
“Oh, come now. Surely over the years, someone caught your fancy. At a dinner or during a ball. Perhaps you danced with him and thought you’d enjoy something more.”
“I was married.”
“I’m not suggesting you had an affair, because God knows you’d never do anything inappropriate, but thinking about it isn’t wrong. Surely you thought about it.”
“I did not, sir. Never.”
To his utter amazement, he realized she was speaking the truth. Never to fantasize about the forbidden? He couldn’t imagine it.
“All right, I’ll give you that you probably never thought about getting close to any other man, but surely you liked someone, found someone else pleasant to be around. I could arrange for him to visit you here so you could come to know him better—”
“I’m in mourning.”
“So you keep reminding me when it’s not necessary, Olivia. Quite honestly, it’s evident by your attire. You look ghastly in black, by the way. Have you anything in violet?”
She stammered out a few sounds. He raised his hand. “Never mind. We can address your clothing later. Here’s the thing. You don’t want me to be guardian of your son. I don’t want to be guardian. The simplest solution to both our problems is for you to marry. And I’m willing to help in any way I can. I’ll bring the suitors to you. Who do you fancy?”
“It would be entirely inappropriate for me to take male callers.”
“Of course, it’s inappropriate. That’s the reason we’ll do it discreetly.”
“When a woman is in mourning, she’s not to issue invitations.”
“You won’t. I will.”
She stood up. “I’m not sure why I bothered to try to make matters right between us.”
And he didn’t know why he kept trying to make them un-right. “Sit down.”
She hesitated.
“Please.”
With a nod, she sat. “Henry likes his dog very much.”
The change in topic startled but pleased him. “As well he should. Cost me a fortune.”
“So he told me.” She smiled, and again he was struck by how approachable it made her appear. If she were his, he thought he’d always seek to make her smile. “He wasn’t quite certain how to go about holding a confidence since you didn’t give him anything to actually hold.”
“That must have been an interesting conversation.”
“I daresay it was most enlightening.”
He should have taken more care about explaining things to the lad, not that he was particularly bothered his mother knew the truth of the situation. He just didn’t want it to get back to Chesney.
“How did you know?” she asked.
He finished chewing the remarkable lamb and swallowed. “Pardon?”
“Helen. Henry’s nanny. You were suspicious of her from the start. Henry told me she kept a stick in her pocket and would whack him on the hand if he displeased her. Those aren’t his precise words, of course, but they are the gist of what he confessed. How did you know she was frightening him?”
Something was shifting between them, something he wasn’t quite comfortable with. But he was also weary of the bickering. Until he could get her married off, they’d be living in this house together. Might as well do it amicably. “When I was very young, for a short time, I lived with someone who hurt me. While I was frightened I stammered. I’m certain people stammer for all sorts of reasons, so perhaps one thing had nothing to do with the other. Plus he is a boy, and they are not by nature so terribly well behaved.”
“What you said about Lovingdon earlier, about taking your task as guardian seriously—things between us might not have been quite so difficult had you voiced it to me sooner.”
“Quite honestly, Duchess, I’m not certain I realized it myself until I spoke the words. I’m as baffled as you by your husband’s choice of guardian, but I like this house and everything in it. I intend to keep them.”
“As long as you’re good to Henry, I shall strive to be more gracious.”
