Binding the Shadows
Page 79
“I’m sorry. It was hard for me to trust anyone. I thought I was protecting them. Me. I thought I was doing the right thing.”
She threw up her hands and paced in a circle. “You are living with an illegal name? We share a business! If you get in trouble with the law—”
“I’ve been careful.”
“I don’t care.” Tears brimmed. Hers hands were fists. “Partners don’t lie to each other. If you can’t trust me enough to confide in me, then you shouldn’t be running a business with me.”
“Kar Yee—”
“I don’t want to talk about it right now.” She spun around and marched back toward her car.
“Please stay,” I called after her. “I need to talk to you about it.”
“And I need to go to Tambuku, because one of us has to get it running again.”
“I’ll come with you.”
“Don’t bother.” She got in her car and slammed the door.
That didn’t go well. Not that I thought it would, but it still stung. And it wasn’t over. Jupe stood silent, staring at the dust Kar Yee’s wheels kicked up as she sped away. When he turned to look at me, he wore a pained expression. He almost looked like he was about to cry.
“Please don’t be scared of me,” I said. “I’m still me. I still care about you as much as I did yesterday.”
“I’m not scared,” he said.
I nodded, hoping that was true.
“I’m not,” he insisted. “I guess I feel like Kar Yee. I just wish you would’ve told me sooner. It sort of hurts my feelings that you didn’t. I mean, you could’ve trusted me.”
“It’s not that. I was afraid and . . . I was ashamed of it.”
“You were?” He considered this for several moments. “I guess I understand. That’s why I never talked about my mom much before, well”—he waved a hand—“all of this happened over Christmas. Sometimes I wish I could erase that part of my life, too.”
“At least your mom is trying. She’s a very sad person, and she’s selfish. I don’t know if she’ll ever be okay or stop making stupid mistakes. And I don’t know if you should give her any more chances—”
“I’m not,” he said firmly.
I nodded. “That’s up to you. But I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s a whole different thing with my mom. My mom is just evil. And really, really dangerous. She is beyond redemption.”
“Wow.” He turned away from the wind and kicked at a knotted cypress tree’s roots that bulged above the dirt. “This is the biggest secret anyone’s ever told me,” he said thoughtfully.
“I trust you.”
He gave me a funny smile, tight, but honest—as if he was surprised I would trust him, pleased I did, but still in shock about the whole thing.
I exhaled a long breath and glanced back at the house. “I need to tell you about something else. Remember when I once told you about my guardian, Priya?”
He nodded. “One of the sigils on your arm.”
I pulled a piece of paper from my pocket. “This sigil. It’s his name. And because you’re connected to me through our bond”—I nodded to his hip, where my own sigil was tattooed—“Priya is your guardian as much as mine. He can only stay on earth for a few minutes at a time, but if you are in trouble, you can call him. You’ll need Heka, and you probably don’t have much. You can try to spit on the sigil—”
He made a face.
“Oh, please,” I said, straining to eject a single laugh. “You know you love gross stuff. If the spit doesn’t work, you’ll have to cut yourself and spill a few drops of blood on it. But make a copy of it first so you don’t lose the image. Take a photo with your phone or something.”
“I just do that and your guardian will cross over to our world?”
“You just say, ‘Priya, come,’ and he will show up. Don’t be frightened of him. He looks like a boy, but he’s got wings.”
“Oh, shit! No way.”
“And he talks a little funny, but you’ll do fine. Don’t call him more than once every couple of days. He can’t stay long—only a couple of minutes, so you’ll need to talk fast. But you can tell him anything. You can even ask him to send me a message.”
“Why would I need to do that?”
I closed my eyes briefly. “Because I might have to leave.”
“What do you mean?”
“My mom can control me. It’s getting worse. I’m afraid she’s going to make me do something against my will.” I attempted to swallow the lump in my throat.
“But—”
“If I stay, it might put people in danger. I’m her puppet. When I tap into moon magick, she can control me.”
“So don’t. Dad says just because I have a knack doesn’t mean I have to use it. Isn’t this the same thing?”
“Even if I don’t use it, she can get me when I’m sleeping. She’s dangerous, Jupe. You are in danger by being around me. She’s crazy and she wants revenge against me. She will try to hurt you.”
Jupe was fighting back tears. “You can’t leave. Where will you go?”
“To my order in Florida. My godfather might be able to help track down the ritual my parents used to make me this way. Maybe I can use it to fix myself. I don’t know.”
She threw up her hands and paced in a circle. “You are living with an illegal name? We share a business! If you get in trouble with the law—”
“I’ve been careful.”
“I don’t care.” Tears brimmed. Hers hands were fists. “Partners don’t lie to each other. If you can’t trust me enough to confide in me, then you shouldn’t be running a business with me.”
“Kar Yee—”
“I don’t want to talk about it right now.” She spun around and marched back toward her car.
“Please stay,” I called after her. “I need to talk to you about it.”
“And I need to go to Tambuku, because one of us has to get it running again.”
“I’ll come with you.”
“Don’t bother.” She got in her car and slammed the door.
That didn’t go well. Not that I thought it would, but it still stung. And it wasn’t over. Jupe stood silent, staring at the dust Kar Yee’s wheels kicked up as she sped away. When he turned to look at me, he wore a pained expression. He almost looked like he was about to cry.
“Please don’t be scared of me,” I said. “I’m still me. I still care about you as much as I did yesterday.”
“I’m not scared,” he said.
I nodded, hoping that was true.
“I’m not,” he insisted. “I guess I feel like Kar Yee. I just wish you would’ve told me sooner. It sort of hurts my feelings that you didn’t. I mean, you could’ve trusted me.”
“It’s not that. I was afraid and . . . I was ashamed of it.”
“You were?” He considered this for several moments. “I guess I understand. That’s why I never talked about my mom much before, well”—he waved a hand—“all of this happened over Christmas. Sometimes I wish I could erase that part of my life, too.”
“At least your mom is trying. She’s a very sad person, and she’s selfish. I don’t know if she’ll ever be okay or stop making stupid mistakes. And I don’t know if you should give her any more chances—”
“I’m not,” he said firmly.
I nodded. “That’s up to you. But I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s a whole different thing with my mom. My mom is just evil. And really, really dangerous. She is beyond redemption.”
“Wow.” He turned away from the wind and kicked at a knotted cypress tree’s roots that bulged above the dirt. “This is the biggest secret anyone’s ever told me,” he said thoughtfully.
“I trust you.”
He gave me a funny smile, tight, but honest—as if he was surprised I would trust him, pleased I did, but still in shock about the whole thing.
I exhaled a long breath and glanced back at the house. “I need to tell you about something else. Remember when I once told you about my guardian, Priya?”
He nodded. “One of the sigils on your arm.”
I pulled a piece of paper from my pocket. “This sigil. It’s his name. And because you’re connected to me through our bond”—I nodded to his hip, where my own sigil was tattooed—“Priya is your guardian as much as mine. He can only stay on earth for a few minutes at a time, but if you are in trouble, you can call him. You’ll need Heka, and you probably don’t have much. You can try to spit on the sigil—”
He made a face.
“Oh, please,” I said, straining to eject a single laugh. “You know you love gross stuff. If the spit doesn’t work, you’ll have to cut yourself and spill a few drops of blood on it. But make a copy of it first so you don’t lose the image. Take a photo with your phone or something.”
“I just do that and your guardian will cross over to our world?”
“You just say, ‘Priya, come,’ and he will show up. Don’t be frightened of him. He looks like a boy, but he’s got wings.”
“Oh, shit! No way.”
“And he talks a little funny, but you’ll do fine. Don’t call him more than once every couple of days. He can’t stay long—only a couple of minutes, so you’ll need to talk fast. But you can tell him anything. You can even ask him to send me a message.”
“Why would I need to do that?”
I closed my eyes briefly. “Because I might have to leave.”
“What do you mean?”
“My mom can control me. It’s getting worse. I’m afraid she’s going to make me do something against my will.” I attempted to swallow the lump in my throat.
“But—”
“If I stay, it might put people in danger. I’m her puppet. When I tap into moon magick, she can control me.”
“So don’t. Dad says just because I have a knack doesn’t mean I have to use it. Isn’t this the same thing?”
“Even if I don’t use it, she can get me when I’m sleeping. She’s dangerous, Jupe. You are in danger by being around me. She’s crazy and she wants revenge against me. She will try to hurt you.”
Jupe was fighting back tears. “You can’t leave. Where will you go?”
“To my order in Florida. My godfather might be able to help track down the ritual my parents used to make me this way. Maybe I can use it to fix myself. I don’t know.”
