Bleeding Hearts
Page 20
Somehow, I knew she was lying.
For one thing, I hadn’t seen her take a single sip of anything the entire time we were at the beach. And I knew exactly how people acted when they’d had too much to drink. Not like this.
In the hall, the jar was empty.
Chapter 8
Lucy
I knew Mom would knock on my door the minute she came home and heard the Smiths coming from my speakers. She’d given me all their albums the day I turned fourteen and swore they were the band that got her through high school.
“Uh-oh.” She poked her head in. “I heard the music. That’s not a good sign.”
I was curled up on my bed, the only light coming from a candle and my laptop screen on my desk. I’d texted Kieran to come over so I could talk to him and then buried myself in chocolate while I waited. She picked her way around the clothes and DVD cases scattered over the floor. “What’s the matter, Lucky Moon?”
I just shrugged and ate more chocolate. She sat on the edge of the bed and nudged me until I moved over and made space for her. She stretched out beside me and stared up at the sari material draped from the ceiling like a sultan’s tent. My walls were purple and covered in framed pictures and the antique glass doorknobs where I hung all my necklaces.
“Oh, Mom,” I finally said, feeling my throat burn. “It’s all messed up now.”
“What is, sweetie? Did you and Nicholas have a fight?”
“Why do people keep asking me that? Not everything is about boys.”
“Okay. Is it school? I know it’s not as exciting as boys and vampires, but I hope you’re worrying about it a little. Don’t you have midterms soon?”
“Mom.”
“Sorry. Not school, clearly. What is it, then?”
“Solange.”
She looked surprised. “You and Solange had a fight?” She should look surprised. The last time we’d seriously fought, it was over whether werewolves smelled like wet dog, and I’d pulled her hair. We were eight.
“Not really a fight,” I explained. “But it’s … weird now. They’re all keeping secrets from me, and I’m barely allowed to go over there. And she never answers her phone!”
Mom paused for a moment.
I didn’t like the look on her face. “What?”
“Maybe it’s for the best.”
I sat up. “What? It is not! How could you say that?”
She sat up too, drawing up her knees. The bells on her silver anklet sang softly. It was a sound that comforted me. Growing up, I always knew where my mom was in the house by the jingling of her anklet.
“Honey, I know you love the Drakes. We do too. But the fact is, you’re human. They’re not. You can’t pretend otherwise.”
I blinked at her. “You’re the one who’s always saying our differences shouldn’t matter.”
“I know.” She took a deep breath. “And I’m so proud of you for being loyal and strong and seeing people for who and not what they are. But the Drakes are dangerous right now. Helena and I both—”
“Wait.” I swallowed a thorny lump of anxiety. “You and Solange’s mom talked about this behind my back? You’re part of the freeze-out?”
“It’s not a freeze-out,” she insisted, wincing. “And I know you’re hurt, but we’re worried about you. We just want to keep you safe.”
All of a sudden I really understood how Solange felt.
And it sucked.
“I can take care of myself,” I said flatly.
“You’re sixteen years old.”
“So? I’ve been training with the Helios-Ra, and before that Helena showed me a bunch of moves,” I insisted. “I can fight better than Dad.”
She pursed her lips. “That’s not exactly a winning argument, Lucky. We don’t want you to fight.”
“Well, neither do I!” Which was a lie. Right now I really wanted to break someone’s nose. “But I’m fine. We’re all fine.” I wasn’t about to mention the Hel-Blar at the beach or the incident in the hall with Christabel. “Mom, you keep saying I can’t be like them, but I can’t be like you, either. I’m just me,” I said quietly. “And you can’t suddenly take away half my family and expect me to be okay with that.”
“I know.” She scrubbed a hand over her face, looking tired and older than usual.
I went cold, as if my belly were full of icicles. “And you can’t forbid me from seeing Nicholas.” I’d wanted my voice to be strong and calm and grown-up, but instead it squeaked like a little girl’s.
“We aren’t,” Mom assured me, half smiling. “I’ve been your mom for a long time. You think I don’t know just how well that would work?”
I could almost breathe again. “Okay.” I exhaled sharply. “Okay.”
“Just think about what I said.” She slid off the bed. “And clean your room and do your homework and eat your vegetables.” She winked. “I just wanted to say something mom-ish that didn’t involve mortal peril of some kind.”
“Mom,” I said quietly as she opened the door. She looked over her shoulder. “I’m not stupid. And I’m way more careful than everyone gives me credit for. So at some point you’re going to have to let me be me and trust that I know what I’m doing. Just like the Drakes are going to have to stop making Solange the princess in the tower.” I lifted my chin. “Because she’s not Snow White or whatever. And if this is some kind of a fairy tale, then I get to be a wolf or a witch or a wild girl, not the damsel in distress.”
For one thing, I hadn’t seen her take a single sip of anything the entire time we were at the beach. And I knew exactly how people acted when they’d had too much to drink. Not like this.
In the hall, the jar was empty.
Chapter 8
Lucy
I knew Mom would knock on my door the minute she came home and heard the Smiths coming from my speakers. She’d given me all their albums the day I turned fourteen and swore they were the band that got her through high school.
“Uh-oh.” She poked her head in. “I heard the music. That’s not a good sign.”
I was curled up on my bed, the only light coming from a candle and my laptop screen on my desk. I’d texted Kieran to come over so I could talk to him and then buried myself in chocolate while I waited. She picked her way around the clothes and DVD cases scattered over the floor. “What’s the matter, Lucky Moon?”
I just shrugged and ate more chocolate. She sat on the edge of the bed and nudged me until I moved over and made space for her. She stretched out beside me and stared up at the sari material draped from the ceiling like a sultan’s tent. My walls were purple and covered in framed pictures and the antique glass doorknobs where I hung all my necklaces.
“Oh, Mom,” I finally said, feeling my throat burn. “It’s all messed up now.”
“What is, sweetie? Did you and Nicholas have a fight?”
“Why do people keep asking me that? Not everything is about boys.”
“Okay. Is it school? I know it’s not as exciting as boys and vampires, but I hope you’re worrying about it a little. Don’t you have midterms soon?”
“Mom.”
“Sorry. Not school, clearly. What is it, then?”
“Solange.”
She looked surprised. “You and Solange had a fight?” She should look surprised. The last time we’d seriously fought, it was over whether werewolves smelled like wet dog, and I’d pulled her hair. We were eight.
“Not really a fight,” I explained. “But it’s … weird now. They’re all keeping secrets from me, and I’m barely allowed to go over there. And she never answers her phone!”
Mom paused for a moment.
I didn’t like the look on her face. “What?”
“Maybe it’s for the best.”
I sat up. “What? It is not! How could you say that?”
She sat up too, drawing up her knees. The bells on her silver anklet sang softly. It was a sound that comforted me. Growing up, I always knew where my mom was in the house by the jingling of her anklet.
“Honey, I know you love the Drakes. We do too. But the fact is, you’re human. They’re not. You can’t pretend otherwise.”
I blinked at her. “You’re the one who’s always saying our differences shouldn’t matter.”
“I know.” She took a deep breath. “And I’m so proud of you for being loyal and strong and seeing people for who and not what they are. But the Drakes are dangerous right now. Helena and I both—”
“Wait.” I swallowed a thorny lump of anxiety. “You and Solange’s mom talked about this behind my back? You’re part of the freeze-out?”
“It’s not a freeze-out,” she insisted, wincing. “And I know you’re hurt, but we’re worried about you. We just want to keep you safe.”
All of a sudden I really understood how Solange felt.
And it sucked.
“I can take care of myself,” I said flatly.
“You’re sixteen years old.”
“So? I’ve been training with the Helios-Ra, and before that Helena showed me a bunch of moves,” I insisted. “I can fight better than Dad.”
She pursed her lips. “That’s not exactly a winning argument, Lucky. We don’t want you to fight.”
“Well, neither do I!” Which was a lie. Right now I really wanted to break someone’s nose. “But I’m fine. We’re all fine.” I wasn’t about to mention the Hel-Blar at the beach or the incident in the hall with Christabel. “Mom, you keep saying I can’t be like them, but I can’t be like you, either. I’m just me,” I said quietly. “And you can’t suddenly take away half my family and expect me to be okay with that.”
“I know.” She scrubbed a hand over her face, looking tired and older than usual.
I went cold, as if my belly were full of icicles. “And you can’t forbid me from seeing Nicholas.” I’d wanted my voice to be strong and calm and grown-up, but instead it squeaked like a little girl’s.
“We aren’t,” Mom assured me, half smiling. “I’ve been your mom for a long time. You think I don’t know just how well that would work?”
I could almost breathe again. “Okay.” I exhaled sharply. “Okay.”
“Just think about what I said.” She slid off the bed. “And clean your room and do your homework and eat your vegetables.” She winked. “I just wanted to say something mom-ish that didn’t involve mortal peril of some kind.”
“Mom,” I said quietly as she opened the door. She looked over her shoulder. “I’m not stupid. And I’m way more careful than everyone gives me credit for. So at some point you’re going to have to let me be me and trust that I know what I’m doing. Just like the Drakes are going to have to stop making Solange the princess in the tower.” I lifted my chin. “Because she’s not Snow White or whatever. And if this is some kind of a fairy tale, then I get to be a wolf or a witch or a wild girl, not the damsel in distress.”
