Bound by Flames
Page 58
My gaze slid to him with mild shock. Talk about not trying to smooth things over with small talk!
“Hi, Dad,” I said, rising out of habit. Then I didn’t know what to do. Go over and shake his hand? Attempt a hug or a peck on the cheek? Neither sounded like a good idea, so I just stood there, feeling the awkwardness creep into my bones.
My father cleared his throat. “You, ah, look good.” He sounded surprised, which was more than a little insulting until I remembered the last images he would have seen of me: bald, skinned, and screaming in agony.
The memory brought back a shiver I couldn’t suppress. Vlad rose, too, his arm settling almost casually around my shoulders.
“You’re unnerved by me, so you wish I’d leave the two of you alone to talk?” Vlad snorted. “Your personal discomfort means nothing to me, Hugh . . . wait, that’s not true. I enjoy it.”
My father stiffened, either at the words or how Vlad had read his mind.
“Vlad, what are you doing?” I asked in a low voice.
He didn’t reply. Just continued to aim his fuck-you smile at my dad, as if daring him to get offended enough to leave. Wow, did he really hate my father that much? If so, why had he brought him on the same plane with us? He hadn’t the other times he’d flown my dad and Gretchen to the same places we’d been to . . .
All at once, I realized why Vlad was acting this way. By provoking my father, he was testing his resolve. If Hugh wasn’t truly serious about wanting to mend some fences with me, he could use Vlad’s taunts as an excuse for walking away. Again.
And so could I, came my next realization. Vlad wasn’t just doing this to test my dad. He was also providing a balm for the wound he expected my father to inflict on me. After all, if I was mad at Vlad for supposedly running my father off, then I wasn’t hurting as much over my dad rejecting me again.
I slid my arm around Vlad’s waist. Even with his aura tamped down and his emotions shuttered, he pulsated with more energy than a live wire. He could decimate the man glaring at him, yet my dad didn’t know what I did: that love motivated Vlad, even in his current rudeness. Talk about beauty that defied appearances.
“Dad,” I said steadily, “I want to talk to you, too, but Vlad stays. I know you don’t like him and he’s not being shy about how pissed he is at you, but it’s vampire custom that a husband and wife remain together under all circumstances, so you need to get used to us being a package deal.”
Vlad’s shields cracked and a wave of pleasure rubbed my subconscious. In response, I tightened my grip around him. After everything we’d been through, I meant my declaration of unity, and it covered more than this exchange with my father.
I couldn’t read minds, but my father’s scent sharpened and his leg muscles tensed as if readying to carry him away. I braced, sad that his impending rejection felt familiar. While I still had the chance, I told him what I needed to say.
“I love you, Dad, and I want a relationship with you, but I don’t need one, and that has nothing to do with my changing into a vampire. A long time ago, I learned that I could survive without your approval or your love.”
“Leila,” he began, taking a step toward me.
“Don’t.” Briefly, I closed my eyes. “You might want to forgive me for my telling Mom that you cheated on her, but deep down, you haven’t. That’s why you keep pushing me away, but here’s the truth: I didn’t cause Mom to leave you. You did by your actions. I told her about your infidelity out of spite and that’s my sin, but she forgave me.” My voice strengthened. “She forgave both of us, and she still loves us, too. I felt it when I saw her after I died and before Vlad brought me back.”
He took in a harsh breath, his hand trembling so hard that the cane he walked with began to shake. Tears began to trickle in slow trails down my cheeks. Not of sadness this time; of joy at the memory of my glimpse of my mother.
“I’d forgotten the little lines that crinkled around her eyes when she smiled,” I said, my voice huskier. “Or how she smelled like rainwater and freesia. And I hadn’t realized how much I needed to know that she forgave me until I felt it within every corner of my soul. Maybe you’ve needed to know that, too.”
A tear slipped down his weathered, lined face, and he bowed his head as if embarrassed that I’d seen it.
“Was she . . . where she was, was she happy?” he rasped.
I crossed the short distance to my father, seeing his startled expression as he looked up to find me right in front of him. That’s right; my movements would be a blur to him now.
“Yes, she was happy,” I said, letting the light out of my eyes. Whatever did or didn’t happen in our relationship, I needed him to know that, and if it meant implanting that knowledge with vampire mind control, so be it.
He smiled with a joy I hadn’t seen in years, breaking my heart because it momentarily transformed his face into the one I remembered from my childhood. I couldn’t stop myself from touching his cheek even as I tried to memorize how he looked.
“I love you, Dad,” I whispered, drawing down the power in my gaze. That, he had to choose to believe for himself. Then I left him and walked back over to Vlad. “Why don’t you think things over for a little while?” I said in a normal, controlled voice. “Maybe we can talk again in the near future.”
He blinked as if surprised to realize that, in effect, he’d been dismissed. Then he swiped his cheek and nodded once.
“Hi, Dad,” I said, rising out of habit. Then I didn’t know what to do. Go over and shake his hand? Attempt a hug or a peck on the cheek? Neither sounded like a good idea, so I just stood there, feeling the awkwardness creep into my bones.
My father cleared his throat. “You, ah, look good.” He sounded surprised, which was more than a little insulting until I remembered the last images he would have seen of me: bald, skinned, and screaming in agony.
The memory brought back a shiver I couldn’t suppress. Vlad rose, too, his arm settling almost casually around my shoulders.
“You’re unnerved by me, so you wish I’d leave the two of you alone to talk?” Vlad snorted. “Your personal discomfort means nothing to me, Hugh . . . wait, that’s not true. I enjoy it.”
My father stiffened, either at the words or how Vlad had read his mind.
“Vlad, what are you doing?” I asked in a low voice.
He didn’t reply. Just continued to aim his fuck-you smile at my dad, as if daring him to get offended enough to leave. Wow, did he really hate my father that much? If so, why had he brought him on the same plane with us? He hadn’t the other times he’d flown my dad and Gretchen to the same places we’d been to . . .
All at once, I realized why Vlad was acting this way. By provoking my father, he was testing his resolve. If Hugh wasn’t truly serious about wanting to mend some fences with me, he could use Vlad’s taunts as an excuse for walking away. Again.
And so could I, came my next realization. Vlad wasn’t just doing this to test my dad. He was also providing a balm for the wound he expected my father to inflict on me. After all, if I was mad at Vlad for supposedly running my father off, then I wasn’t hurting as much over my dad rejecting me again.
I slid my arm around Vlad’s waist. Even with his aura tamped down and his emotions shuttered, he pulsated with more energy than a live wire. He could decimate the man glaring at him, yet my dad didn’t know what I did: that love motivated Vlad, even in his current rudeness. Talk about beauty that defied appearances.
“Dad,” I said steadily, “I want to talk to you, too, but Vlad stays. I know you don’t like him and he’s not being shy about how pissed he is at you, but it’s vampire custom that a husband and wife remain together under all circumstances, so you need to get used to us being a package deal.”
Vlad’s shields cracked and a wave of pleasure rubbed my subconscious. In response, I tightened my grip around him. After everything we’d been through, I meant my declaration of unity, and it covered more than this exchange with my father.
I couldn’t read minds, but my father’s scent sharpened and his leg muscles tensed as if readying to carry him away. I braced, sad that his impending rejection felt familiar. While I still had the chance, I told him what I needed to say.
“I love you, Dad, and I want a relationship with you, but I don’t need one, and that has nothing to do with my changing into a vampire. A long time ago, I learned that I could survive without your approval or your love.”
“Leila,” he began, taking a step toward me.
“Don’t.” Briefly, I closed my eyes. “You might want to forgive me for my telling Mom that you cheated on her, but deep down, you haven’t. That’s why you keep pushing me away, but here’s the truth: I didn’t cause Mom to leave you. You did by your actions. I told her about your infidelity out of spite and that’s my sin, but she forgave me.” My voice strengthened. “She forgave both of us, and she still loves us, too. I felt it when I saw her after I died and before Vlad brought me back.”
He took in a harsh breath, his hand trembling so hard that the cane he walked with began to shake. Tears began to trickle in slow trails down my cheeks. Not of sadness this time; of joy at the memory of my glimpse of my mother.
“I’d forgotten the little lines that crinkled around her eyes when she smiled,” I said, my voice huskier. “Or how she smelled like rainwater and freesia. And I hadn’t realized how much I needed to know that she forgave me until I felt it within every corner of my soul. Maybe you’ve needed to know that, too.”
A tear slipped down his weathered, lined face, and he bowed his head as if embarrassed that I’d seen it.
“Was she . . . where she was, was she happy?” he rasped.
I crossed the short distance to my father, seeing his startled expression as he looked up to find me right in front of him. That’s right; my movements would be a blur to him now.
“Yes, she was happy,” I said, letting the light out of my eyes. Whatever did or didn’t happen in our relationship, I needed him to know that, and if it meant implanting that knowledge with vampire mind control, so be it.
He smiled with a joy I hadn’t seen in years, breaking my heart because it momentarily transformed his face into the one I remembered from my childhood. I couldn’t stop myself from touching his cheek even as I tried to memorize how he looked.
“I love you, Dad,” I whispered, drawing down the power in my gaze. That, he had to choose to believe for himself. Then I left him and walked back over to Vlad. “Why don’t you think things over for a little while?” I said in a normal, controlled voice. “Maybe we can talk again in the near future.”
He blinked as if surprised to realize that, in effect, he’d been dismissed. Then he swiped his cheek and nodded once.
