Built
Page 53
“You don’t wear a hat, Zeb. If you don’t, I don’t. I hate hats.”
I glared at my sister as she hooted out a laugh. The boy had inherited more than my coloring and my height. It seemed like my stubbornness and natural defiance were coursing through him as well.
“I do when it’s cold. I just forgot it today, and when I tell you something like that, you need to know it’s for your own good, Hyde. If you’re cold and a hat will keep you warm, then I’m gonna make you wear a hat even if you don’t want to.”
He seemed to consider it for a second, matching green eyes locked on mine in an unwavering battle of wills. I thought I was going to have to explain that I didn’t want him to catch a cold and that everyone wore a hat in Colorado in the winter, some even when it wasn’t winter, but just as fast as his defiance flared to life it quieted back down and he nodded at me solemnly.
“Okay, Zeb. If you want me to wear a hat so I won’t be cold, then I will.” His eyes widened and a crooked smile that was missing a tooth flashed across his face. “Can it be a Batman hat?”
I snorted out a laugh. “It can be whatever kind of hat you want as long as you wear it.”
Joss heaved a dramatic sigh and asked if we could go get pizza. I was going to say no since I fed Hyde pizza the last time I had him for a visit, but apparently five-year-olds could eat pizza every day and his eyes lit up at the prospect.
It was a short drive to a pizza shop on Colfax, and as we all piled into a booth it ended up being the kids on one side and the adults on the other. I was really happy my niece had decided to take Hyde under her wing. He seemed at ease with her and I thought that maybe spending more time with my family would ease him into understanding I was his father and he wasn’t alone anymore. I was still trying to figure out the best way to tell him, the easiest way to explain the situation, when I heard Joss tell Hyde:
“I don’t see my dad, but that’s okay because I see my gram and Uncle Zeb all the time. And my mom has a man friend named Wes that is really nice. He watches cartoons with me and helps me do homework.”
Hyde nodded sagely like he understood all those words and reached for his plastic cup that had the lid on it.
“I never had a dad, but I had lots of uncles.”
Beryl was leaning forward to derail the touchy subject when Joss turned to the dark-haired little boy and blurted out the words I had been struggling with for weeks. “Uncle Zeb is your dad, so you have a dad now. The best dad ever.”
I opened my mouth in shock as Beryl barked her daughter’s name in horror. I was gaping at my son like a fish as he turned wide eyes in my direction.
“What? It’s true. Why am I getting yelled at?” Joss huffed out the words, but I barely heard them as my son continued to watch me like he was afraid I was going to disappear in a puff of smoke before him.
His head cocked to the side and he lifted his cup to his lips so he could slurp on his soda. When he was done he leaned forward a little bit and asked, “For real?”
I wasn’t sure he really understood what it all meant, so I nodded. “Yeah, for real. I’m your dad, and I’ve been working really hard so that you can come stay with me all the time really soon.”
I waited for him to cry, or to ask a million questions. I waited for him to be happy or upset. I waited for him to do anything, but he just stared at me and continued to play with his cup.
Beryl asked him if he was all right and he nodded without saying anything. I thought I should grab him and go, but the pizza came and he devoured a massive slice, still without saying a word. Joss was pouting because she was in trouble for speaking out of turn, and I knew Beryl was concerned about the anxious tension that was rolling off of me in waves.
We finished and paid the bill. I told Joss I wasn’t mad at her because she looked like she was going to cry and told my sister I would call her after I had Hyde settled. Really I meant I would call her after I was settled but that was neither here nor there.
Once I had the little boy strapped into his seat in my truck, I climbed behind the wheel and started across town to take him back to his temporary home. I was watching him out of the corner of my eye as he stared out the window.
“You okay back there, buddy?”
“Yeah.” He was quiet for a second and then he said my name softly. “Zeb?”
I plastered a smile on my face and nodded encouragingly at him when he twisted to look at me.
“You’re my dad?”
“That’s right.”
“And I can come live with you?”
“Eventually. There are some things I have to do first, but I’m working really hard to get them all done.”
He stuck out his bottom lip like he was thinking really hard and then he stated so chillingly and matter-of-factly that it made my heart clench. “My mom died. I don’t want you to be my dad if it means you’re going to die.”
“Oh, Hyde.” I had to take a moment to get my composure back so I could answer him. “Your mom did some things that were really dangerous. I don’t do any of those kinds of things, so my chances of dying are really slim. I have you to take care of, so I promise to do my very best to stick around as long as possible, okay?”
He was quiet for a long time but eventually sucked his lip back in and flashed me that uneven grin.
“Okay.” He leaned back in his seat and looked out the windshield. “Will you still play with me and let me ride in the truck?”
I wanted to laugh but instead it came out as a wheeze of relief. “Yep. We can play every day and we’ll go for a ride in the truck whenever you want.”
He clapped his hands and grinned even wider. “If you’re my dad, does that mean when I get bigger I’m going to be a giant, too?”
That made me laugh for real. “Possibly, but you have to be a friendly giant if you get this big.”
“I can do that.”
And just like that, it was settled. I was his dad, he was my son, and we were a team from here on out. It was a good day and I needed to thank my niece and her big mouth and total lack of filter for doing what I, a grown-ass man, a giant according to my kid, hadn’t had the balls to do.
From the mouths of babes.
CHAPTER 13
Sayer
I scowled at the pretty saleswoman dressed fairly similarly to my own after-court outfit as she cruised by where Zeb was shaking his head at the price of bedding for a kid’s bed. She’d already asked once if she could help us find anything in the sprawling department store located inside the upscale Cherry Creek Mall. And I had already told her once that I knew exactly where we needed to go, so I could only assume her return appearance had more to do with the way Zeb’s ass looked in his faded jeans and the way his flannel shirt pulled across his shoulders than it did with any actual desire to help.
I glared at my sister as she hooted out a laugh. The boy had inherited more than my coloring and my height. It seemed like my stubbornness and natural defiance were coursing through him as well.
“I do when it’s cold. I just forgot it today, and when I tell you something like that, you need to know it’s for your own good, Hyde. If you’re cold and a hat will keep you warm, then I’m gonna make you wear a hat even if you don’t want to.”
He seemed to consider it for a second, matching green eyes locked on mine in an unwavering battle of wills. I thought I was going to have to explain that I didn’t want him to catch a cold and that everyone wore a hat in Colorado in the winter, some even when it wasn’t winter, but just as fast as his defiance flared to life it quieted back down and he nodded at me solemnly.
“Okay, Zeb. If you want me to wear a hat so I won’t be cold, then I will.” His eyes widened and a crooked smile that was missing a tooth flashed across his face. “Can it be a Batman hat?”
I snorted out a laugh. “It can be whatever kind of hat you want as long as you wear it.”
Joss heaved a dramatic sigh and asked if we could go get pizza. I was going to say no since I fed Hyde pizza the last time I had him for a visit, but apparently five-year-olds could eat pizza every day and his eyes lit up at the prospect.
It was a short drive to a pizza shop on Colfax, and as we all piled into a booth it ended up being the kids on one side and the adults on the other. I was really happy my niece had decided to take Hyde under her wing. He seemed at ease with her and I thought that maybe spending more time with my family would ease him into understanding I was his father and he wasn’t alone anymore. I was still trying to figure out the best way to tell him, the easiest way to explain the situation, when I heard Joss tell Hyde:
“I don’t see my dad, but that’s okay because I see my gram and Uncle Zeb all the time. And my mom has a man friend named Wes that is really nice. He watches cartoons with me and helps me do homework.”
Hyde nodded sagely like he understood all those words and reached for his plastic cup that had the lid on it.
“I never had a dad, but I had lots of uncles.”
Beryl was leaning forward to derail the touchy subject when Joss turned to the dark-haired little boy and blurted out the words I had been struggling with for weeks. “Uncle Zeb is your dad, so you have a dad now. The best dad ever.”
I opened my mouth in shock as Beryl barked her daughter’s name in horror. I was gaping at my son like a fish as he turned wide eyes in my direction.
“What? It’s true. Why am I getting yelled at?” Joss huffed out the words, but I barely heard them as my son continued to watch me like he was afraid I was going to disappear in a puff of smoke before him.
His head cocked to the side and he lifted his cup to his lips so he could slurp on his soda. When he was done he leaned forward a little bit and asked, “For real?”
I wasn’t sure he really understood what it all meant, so I nodded. “Yeah, for real. I’m your dad, and I’ve been working really hard so that you can come stay with me all the time really soon.”
I waited for him to cry, or to ask a million questions. I waited for him to be happy or upset. I waited for him to do anything, but he just stared at me and continued to play with his cup.
Beryl asked him if he was all right and he nodded without saying anything. I thought I should grab him and go, but the pizza came and he devoured a massive slice, still without saying a word. Joss was pouting because she was in trouble for speaking out of turn, and I knew Beryl was concerned about the anxious tension that was rolling off of me in waves.
We finished and paid the bill. I told Joss I wasn’t mad at her because she looked like she was going to cry and told my sister I would call her after I had Hyde settled. Really I meant I would call her after I was settled but that was neither here nor there.
Once I had the little boy strapped into his seat in my truck, I climbed behind the wheel and started across town to take him back to his temporary home. I was watching him out of the corner of my eye as he stared out the window.
“You okay back there, buddy?”
“Yeah.” He was quiet for a second and then he said my name softly. “Zeb?”
I plastered a smile on my face and nodded encouragingly at him when he twisted to look at me.
“You’re my dad?”
“That’s right.”
“And I can come live with you?”
“Eventually. There are some things I have to do first, but I’m working really hard to get them all done.”
He stuck out his bottom lip like he was thinking really hard and then he stated so chillingly and matter-of-factly that it made my heart clench. “My mom died. I don’t want you to be my dad if it means you’re going to die.”
“Oh, Hyde.” I had to take a moment to get my composure back so I could answer him. “Your mom did some things that were really dangerous. I don’t do any of those kinds of things, so my chances of dying are really slim. I have you to take care of, so I promise to do my very best to stick around as long as possible, okay?”
He was quiet for a long time but eventually sucked his lip back in and flashed me that uneven grin.
“Okay.” He leaned back in his seat and looked out the windshield. “Will you still play with me and let me ride in the truck?”
I wanted to laugh but instead it came out as a wheeze of relief. “Yep. We can play every day and we’ll go for a ride in the truck whenever you want.”
He clapped his hands and grinned even wider. “If you’re my dad, does that mean when I get bigger I’m going to be a giant, too?”
That made me laugh for real. “Possibly, but you have to be a friendly giant if you get this big.”
“I can do that.”
And just like that, it was settled. I was his dad, he was my son, and we were a team from here on out. It was a good day and I needed to thank my niece and her big mouth and total lack of filter for doing what I, a grown-ass man, a giant according to my kid, hadn’t had the balls to do.
From the mouths of babes.
CHAPTER 13
Sayer
I scowled at the pretty saleswoman dressed fairly similarly to my own after-court outfit as she cruised by where Zeb was shaking his head at the price of bedding for a kid’s bed. She’d already asked once if she could help us find anything in the sprawling department store located inside the upscale Cherry Creek Mall. And I had already told her once that I knew exactly where we needed to go, so I could only assume her return appearance had more to do with the way Zeb’s ass looked in his faded jeans and the way his flannel shirt pulled across his shoulders than it did with any actual desire to help.
