Bullet
Chapter 13
13
IF I HAD ever wanted to give in to hysterics, it was then. How do you fight something with no body to kill? How do you fight something that can possess the most powerful vampires in the world and use them like puppets? How the fuck does anyone fight something like that?
I think we were all lying there thinking about the same thing when someone's cell phone rang. It was playing the theme to the old Mike Hammer show. Nathaniel spilled off the bed and started rummaging in the clothes on the floor. "It's the ring tone for Max, the Master of Las Vegas," he said.
"On your phone?" I asked.
"On yours," he said, and raised my phone from the mess of clothes. He opened it and said, "This is Anita's phone, Max, just hang a minute." He handed it toward me. I mouthed, "The theme to Mike Hammer?" He wiggled the phone at me and frowned. I took the phone, but we were so going to have to talk about what new ring tones he'd put on my phone. I'd just gotten "Wild Boys" off it as my main ring tone and put it to a default peal of church bells.
"Max?" I said, and made it more question than statement. Nicky was still mostly on top of me, not recovered from my forcing his beast. Violent change hurt. I took the phone as I lay wedged between Jean-Claude and Asher.
"Anita, what the fuck are you guys doing tonight?" His voice was an unhappy bass growl. He was a big man to go with the voice, almost totally bald in that I've-lost-my-hair kind of way, not a fashion-statement way. He was built big and solid like an old-time linebacker. If you didn't know what you were looking at you might say fat, but it wasn't; the muscle just hid itself, but it was there.
"Well, hello to you, too, Max," I said, and my voice was unhappy, ready to be grumpy right back to him. It made me feel a little better that I could be grumpy about a rude tone of voice. If I could still be pissy about small things, then maybe the world hadn't ended because the Mother of All Darkness was still "alive."
"Bibi woke up screaming about the dark trying to eat her. She made me call you, Anita, said you and Jean-Claude would know what was happening to her. Do you - know, I mean?" His voice was uncertain now. He'd started life as a mob boss and never lost the job even after death; in fact, he was one of the reasons that Vegas was still an old-fashioned mob town in spite of new blood from Ukraine and other places east. But he loved his wife and he was worried about his little tiger queen.
"Yeah, I know what's happened, though when Bibiana calms down I'd love to hear exactly what the dark did to try to eat her."
"The dark can't be who it used to be, Anita. You told me the Mother of All Darkness was dead. You told me you felt her die when they blew up her body." He was angry now; better angry at me than worried about his wife. Better to blame me than admit he might be scared.
"I told you what I believed at the time, Max. We got our first visit from Mommie Dearest since the bombing tonight, too. Trust me, it wasn't just Bibiana who had a rough night."
"It's been almost a year, Anita. Why now? How?" He cursed under his breath and then said, "What happened to you tonight, Anita?"
I looked the few inches that brought me to Jean-Claude's face. We were all still piled on the bed with the thick goop from Nicky's too-rapid shapeshift beginning to dry in our hair and on our skin. I thought, "What do I say?"
His answer breathed through my mind, "Tell him the truth. He is our ally."
I told Max an abbreviated version of what had happened. Jean-Claude told the others to go and clean up before the gunk dried. Most of the men looked to me to see if I wanted them to go. Honestly, I wanted some hand holding. Jean-Claude sat beside me while I talked to one of his strongest allies, and the men I most wanted to stay and hold me sat on the ruined silk sheets around us, and didn't obey Jean-Claude. I didn't know what to do about it, but I did know that I felt better with Nathaniel, Damian, and Micah near me. Jason had gone to clean up and check on J.J., which was good. Cardinal tried to get Damian to leave, too, but he wanted to know what we were going to do about Mommie Dearest and the council. He was vampire enough to need to know that before he died for the day. Cardinal was woman enough to need her boyfriend farther away from me.
Richard kissed me on the forehead and whispered, "I'll clean up while you do the vampire politics."
I wanted to say more, even though I was still telling Max how deep the shit was, but it felt wrong to let him leave after everything without more good-bye. Jean-Claude must have thought so, too, because he did leave the bed to walk Richard to the door. Micah kissed my cheek and followed them, which surprised me. Jean-Claude might be trying for a last hug, but that was never what Micah and Richard were to each other. Asher stayed by my side, but his face had a listening look. The wereanimals and vampires on the bed could probably hear everything on both ends of the phone. They might be staying to cuddle, but they were also staying to listen.
I finished listing the disaster, and Max said, "Motherfucker."
"That's what I said."
"Bibi insisted that everyone that was coming to St. Louis leave early. Victor, Cyn, Rick, and the others are in the air and headed your way."
"Max, no insult to your people but we have bigger fish to fry than cementing some sort of arranged marriage treaty between your people and Jean-Claude's."
"Bibi says that our only hope to defeat the Dark is to have another Master of Tigers, another Father of the Day."
"I appreciate the vote of confidence for Jean-Claude, but tiger isn't his animal to call and the only vampire we have who's able to walk in the day isn't a master of anything."
"Your vampire servant, Damian, right, he's your day walker?"
"Yeah."
"And who made him a day walker? It wasn't Jean-Claude, no offense to your Master of the City; it was you that made a weak vampire able to do one of the rarest feats among us bloodsuckers."
"Yeah, but . . ."
"We're not sending our boys to Jean-Claude, Anita. We're sending them to you. Though Auggie of Chicago says we should send him some of our women, something about maybe he'd inherit your power to call tiger like you inherited his ability to call wolf."
"What?" I asked.
There was noise on the other end of the phone. Cloth moving and Max saying, "You okay to do this, Bibi?"
A moment later Chang-Bibi of the White Tiger Clan was on the phone, so I guess she was okay to do this. Or Max couldn't stop her from taking the phone. Sometimes he loved his wife a little too much.
"Anita," and her voice was tear-filled, almost hiccupy with emotion. Since she was one of the scariest weretigers I'd ever met, that was not comforting.
"Hey, Bibiana, I mean, Chang-Bibi."
"It is too late for titles between us, Anita." She took a shaky breath and said, "You must embrace my tigers when they arrive. You must bring the tigers with you into their full power."
"I know that you wanted that, but the other tiger clans don't want you favored above everyone else."
"All their Changs have had the same nightmare that I had, Anita. They have seen the Darkness, and they remember in the heart of them when she tried to rule us all. The Father of the Day, he saved us. He controlled us and kept her from harnessing all the power of the tigers. She only defeated him by destroying the last golden queen."
"How do you know all that now? You didn't know it before."
"It was legend, fairy tales, Anita. I didn't believe in stories of the Living Dark, a dark Goddess, and a God of Living Light, who created our people. Who believes such things?"
She had me there. I mean, I know as a good little Christian I should really buy all that Old Testament stuff, but I thought of it as representative stories trying to explain why a God of Love would make a world where people suffered so much.
"But now you believe," I said.
"What choice do I have?" She sounded bitter.
"What did you dream?" I asked.
"No, to talk of such things gives them power, but it was only the Light, the God, that kept us from her power the first time. It was the combined power of all the tiger clans that gave him the power to keep her from conquering the world."
"Look, Bibiana, we're all shook, but being able to call a little electricity and fire isn't going to defeat Mommie Dearest."
"You have only seen what the weaker of my clan can do, Anita. You haven't even seen what Domino's black tiger side is capable of, but if the Master of Tigers and the Consuming Darkness are real, then the powers that our clans once had must be true, too."
"Bibiana, come on," I said.
"The red tiger you slept with can call fire to his hand, he's a pyrokinetic. They exist even today among the humans."
"Fine, I'll give you that, but white tiger is all metals, and it seems to be basically really uber-static electricity. It's not a weapon."
"Black tiger is water, Anita. The human body is made up mostly of water."
"What are you saying?" I asked.
"I'm saying you have only begun to touch the surface of what we are capable of if you give us back all our powers."
"Cynric hasn't gotten any new powers."
"He's young and you only slept with him once, Anita."
"Once was plenty," I said.
"Blue tiger is the power of air. Legend says that Blue could raise storms and make them obey their will. The golden tigers controlled earth and all energies upon it."
"What does that mean?"
"They could make the very ground obey their will."
"You mean earthquakes?" I didn't even try to keep the disbelief out of my voice.
"One of the council members that Jean-Claude defeated in St. Louis was called the Earthmover, Anita; what do you think he did?"
I licked my lips; I didn't have a good answer, because she was right. The only thing that had kept the duel from turning St. Louis into a pile of rubble was the Earthmover giving his word of honor that he wouldn't use that particular power to defeat Jean-Claude. He'd actually won the duel, but he'd made the mistake of breaking my vampire marks to Jean-Claude and making me belong to his vampire lieutenant. His mistake had been thinking I'd put a stake through Jean-Claude's heart and not risk my own death killing them. They had misjudged me.
"Okay, say that Cynric could call storms, I'm not sure how I feel about a seventeen-year-old with that kind of power in my city."
"But it won't be his power, Anita, it will come to you. If you raise it in the tigers it will come to you, and you will be too powerful for the Darkness to eat."
"I'm not a vampire, Bibiana."
"But you are, you just don't drink blood, Anita. The time for pretty lies is past. The hour is late, Anita, and the Darkness is coming. If you do not save us she will possess all the tigers, including you, and once she has a golden queen - you - as her vessel, she will destroy us all."
"I am not a weretiger. I can't shift."
"Yellow was meant to be our ruler over all, a sort of High Queen. Some say that the power to move the ground is only to the Yellow. We won't know for certain until you bring more of us into our full power."
"Bibiana, this is all speculation. You don't know that any of this is possible."
"Do not doubt it, Anita. You must believe. It must be real. You must be able to harness the power of all the clans. You must."
"I don't must," I said.
"Yes, you must, because if you fail us, the Darkness will rise up and consume the world. It was she who destroyed the yellow tigers so long ago. It was the Darkness who whispered evil in the ear of the First Emperor. She knew once we lost the golden, that the Master of Tigers wouldn't have enough power to stand against her. She crushed him, and nearly destroyed us as a people of any color."
"Do you know how she ended up in the . . . coma in the caverns?" Because that had been where her body lay, in a cavern where only torchlight touched. The vampire council had tried to abandon her a few times when world wars forced them to move countries, but there had been a compulsion that wouldn't let them leave her body behind. But none of the vampires knew why she had fallen into the "sleep." They only knew one night she had not woken. For over a thousand years she'd slept, until now.
"If all the legend is true, then it was her own guards that did it. Those who the vampires are not allowed to name. She let some of them keep their golden tigers as animal to call, because she believed them to be totally loyal to her."
"How did they make her sleep?"
"The story speaks of a spell and a sacrifice of lives. They meant to slay her, but they could not."
"Would not, as in pity moved them, or could not, as in she couldn't die?"
"They couldn't figure out how to kill her permanently. They tied her to the body she last inhabited and left her there."
"Why would the guards tell the tigers?"
"So that if they were all lost, there would be some memory of what happened and what would be needed to defeat her."
"Bibiana, I can't be some sort of weretiger savior."
"Not savior, Anita, master. You must be the Mistress of Tigers. You must be the daywalking vampire who defeats the night once and for all."
I asked what I'd been thinking since it happened. "Does your legend tell how to kill the Darkness, or how to put her back to sleep?"
"The guards that have no name still exist; ask them."
I nodded, and glanced at the bedside table. In the top drawer was my cross and a very ancient piece of metal. The Nameless Vampire Guards were the Harlequin. They'd given me the charm the first time the Mother of All Darkness had messed with me. It was supposed to keep her out of my head and my body. It worked, but it had to be cleansed and recharged periodically, like a gun that needed reloading. My cross just worked, but then it was about faith, and the charm with its imprint of a many-headed tiger on it was magic, not faith. The more witches I knew, the more I realized that there was a difference.
The Harlequin were so scary that simply mentioning them by name could bring them to your door with permission to kill you. They were the elite among vampires, strong enough to have territories of their own, or even be council members, but choosing to cut all ties to their bloodlines and be a combination spy, police, and execution service for the vampire community. Supposedly only the council could set them in motion, but was that still true, or had the Mother of All Darkness already taken back her guards? If she had, we were cooked, done; it was finished before it began. Mommie Dearest was still weak, weaker than she'd been before the council hired mercenaries to blow her to kingdom come. In the past she'd possessed me directly and more easily. Maybe the loss of her body hadn't destroyed her completely, but it had weakened her. She needed the other vampires to talk to us, possess us. If there was a way to destroy her once and for all, we had to do it fast.
"Anita, are you there?"
"I'm sorry, Bibiana, you've just given me a lot to process. I'm thinking."
"Do not think too long, Anita. I will contact the other queens of the clans. I will urge them to send people to you. Our only hope lies in a swift rise to power."
"I haven't agreed to all this, you know that."
"I know, and I know that you are skeptical by nature, but there is no time, Anita. Our time to hesitate has been lost. We have only action before us, and I pray that it is swift action on your part."
"So I what, fuck everyone into their next power level like some pornographic computer game?" I made sure my voice held all the scorn I could manage. I was good at scorn, it was one of my best things. Nathaniel and Damian touched me at the same time, soothing me with their hands and their nearness. Asher put his head in my lap, as if I weren't covered in gunk. With all the terrible things that had happened, he seemed determined to concentrate on the good things. It wasn't like him to be cheerful, but it was like him to be sensual.
Bibiana made a clucking noise at me. "Make all the jokes you wish, but do what we need you to do, or the next time the Dark visits our dreams she will begin to possess the queens of the clans."
"She can't possess anybody who isn't a vampire," I said.
"Why, because the council member known as the Traveller is so limited?" It was Bibiana's turn to sound scornful.
"Yes," I said, my voice no longer so certain.
She laughed, but it was a harsh sound. "You still do not understand what she is; she is one of the first. She has powers that the others mimic, but none of them hold the same level of ability. They are all but pale imitations of her. She can and will possess someone who is not a vampire if it serves her purpose."
"Humans?" I asked.
"I don't believe so. I believe it is vampires and werecats. Her animals to call and her people are all steeds for her to ride if we allow her to grow powerful enough."
"A lot of this is guesswork, Bibiana."
"If Adam and Eve suddenly walked in your door, would you not have to believe in the serpent?"
"What?" I asked.
"This is a story as old to the tigers as the Garden of Eden is to the humans. We believed our story was a metaphor, too, but when the evil from that story turns out to be real, then the story is simply true, Anita. The story is true, and you must process, or whatever word you choose, that fact immediately, and act upon that truth. You must do this for us, Anita, or she will take the vampires one by one, and then she will move against the tigers and take them, too, and when she has that much power to wield she will rise up and cover the world in Darkness. Do you not understand that?"
"Every creation story has an end-of-the-world clause, Bibiana. It's usually just stories of floods or earthquakes that were local to the original people. Disasters that seemed world-destroying, but if you traveled a hundred miles it wasn't."
"You have felt her power, Anita. You have felt that she does not love, or care; she is an intellect and a nearly pure sociopath. She cares only for her own pain; all else is just toys for her to use, not real people, real beings. Do you really believe that she will stop with the destruction of just the vampires?"
I let the silence build as the tight, cold lump in my stomach grew and spread in chills over my skin. "No."
"Then stop trying to throw logic at nightmares. Sometimes the monsters are real, Anita. Sometimes they're real and the only way to defeat them is to be the bigger monster."
"Wait, if I could do all you said, why would I be the bigger monster?"
"Do you really believe that you could hold all that power and resist the temptation to use it?"
"Yes."
"Anita." She said my name the way my stepmother had said it when I was about fifteen.
"Don't you want me to use the power if I could get it? Isn't that the point?"
"Yes, but I'm not just trusting you with the power, Anita. I trust that once you've used it to defeat the Dark, you won't turn all that light and power against us. I'm trusting in your sense of honor and morality as much as I'm trusting in your psychic abilities."
"You've only met me once. That's a lot of trust."
"I put my son, and Cynric, the only known blue tiger in existence, and some of our most powerful weretigers on a plane this morning. If I didn't have faith in you, would I send you such precious things?"
I didn't know what to say to that. Arguing that she was wrong seemed ungrateful; thank you seemed inadequate. What do you say when someone trusts you like that?
"I'll do my best not to hurt anyone."
"See, Anita, not that you will do your best, but that you will do your best not to hurt anyone. You believe your moral compass is broken because of the sex, but I believe if you can get past the idea of it being a sin, your moral compass points true north."
"Don't put all your faith in me, Bibiana."
"Where else can I put it?"
And to that, there really wasn't anything else to say. It wasn't that I minded so much trying to save the world, but the idea that if I failed there was no backup plan . . . We needed a backup plan.
IF I HAD ever wanted to give in to hysterics, it was then. How do you fight something with no body to kill? How do you fight something that can possess the most powerful vampires in the world and use them like puppets? How the fuck does anyone fight something like that?
I think we were all lying there thinking about the same thing when someone's cell phone rang. It was playing the theme to the old Mike Hammer show. Nathaniel spilled off the bed and started rummaging in the clothes on the floor. "It's the ring tone for Max, the Master of Las Vegas," he said.
"On your phone?" I asked.
"On yours," he said, and raised my phone from the mess of clothes. He opened it and said, "This is Anita's phone, Max, just hang a minute." He handed it toward me. I mouthed, "The theme to Mike Hammer?" He wiggled the phone at me and frowned. I took the phone, but we were so going to have to talk about what new ring tones he'd put on my phone. I'd just gotten "Wild Boys" off it as my main ring tone and put it to a default peal of church bells.
"Max?" I said, and made it more question than statement. Nicky was still mostly on top of me, not recovered from my forcing his beast. Violent change hurt. I took the phone as I lay wedged between Jean-Claude and Asher.
"Anita, what the fuck are you guys doing tonight?" His voice was an unhappy bass growl. He was a big man to go with the voice, almost totally bald in that I've-lost-my-hair kind of way, not a fashion-statement way. He was built big and solid like an old-time linebacker. If you didn't know what you were looking at you might say fat, but it wasn't; the muscle just hid itself, but it was there.
"Well, hello to you, too, Max," I said, and my voice was unhappy, ready to be grumpy right back to him. It made me feel a little better that I could be grumpy about a rude tone of voice. If I could still be pissy about small things, then maybe the world hadn't ended because the Mother of All Darkness was still "alive."
"Bibi woke up screaming about the dark trying to eat her. She made me call you, Anita, said you and Jean-Claude would know what was happening to her. Do you - know, I mean?" His voice was uncertain now. He'd started life as a mob boss and never lost the job even after death; in fact, he was one of the reasons that Vegas was still an old-fashioned mob town in spite of new blood from Ukraine and other places east. But he loved his wife and he was worried about his little tiger queen.
"Yeah, I know what's happened, though when Bibiana calms down I'd love to hear exactly what the dark did to try to eat her."
"The dark can't be who it used to be, Anita. You told me the Mother of All Darkness was dead. You told me you felt her die when they blew up her body." He was angry now; better angry at me than worried about his wife. Better to blame me than admit he might be scared.
"I told you what I believed at the time, Max. We got our first visit from Mommie Dearest since the bombing tonight, too. Trust me, it wasn't just Bibiana who had a rough night."
"It's been almost a year, Anita. Why now? How?" He cursed under his breath and then said, "What happened to you tonight, Anita?"
I looked the few inches that brought me to Jean-Claude's face. We were all still piled on the bed with the thick goop from Nicky's too-rapid shapeshift beginning to dry in our hair and on our skin. I thought, "What do I say?"
His answer breathed through my mind, "Tell him the truth. He is our ally."
I told Max an abbreviated version of what had happened. Jean-Claude told the others to go and clean up before the gunk dried. Most of the men looked to me to see if I wanted them to go. Honestly, I wanted some hand holding. Jean-Claude sat beside me while I talked to one of his strongest allies, and the men I most wanted to stay and hold me sat on the ruined silk sheets around us, and didn't obey Jean-Claude. I didn't know what to do about it, but I did know that I felt better with Nathaniel, Damian, and Micah near me. Jason had gone to clean up and check on J.J., which was good. Cardinal tried to get Damian to leave, too, but he wanted to know what we were going to do about Mommie Dearest and the council. He was vampire enough to need to know that before he died for the day. Cardinal was woman enough to need her boyfriend farther away from me.
Richard kissed me on the forehead and whispered, "I'll clean up while you do the vampire politics."
I wanted to say more, even though I was still telling Max how deep the shit was, but it felt wrong to let him leave after everything without more good-bye. Jean-Claude must have thought so, too, because he did leave the bed to walk Richard to the door. Micah kissed my cheek and followed them, which surprised me. Jean-Claude might be trying for a last hug, but that was never what Micah and Richard were to each other. Asher stayed by my side, but his face had a listening look. The wereanimals and vampires on the bed could probably hear everything on both ends of the phone. They might be staying to cuddle, but they were also staying to listen.
I finished listing the disaster, and Max said, "Motherfucker."
"That's what I said."
"Bibi insisted that everyone that was coming to St. Louis leave early. Victor, Cyn, Rick, and the others are in the air and headed your way."
"Max, no insult to your people but we have bigger fish to fry than cementing some sort of arranged marriage treaty between your people and Jean-Claude's."
"Bibi says that our only hope to defeat the Dark is to have another Master of Tigers, another Father of the Day."
"I appreciate the vote of confidence for Jean-Claude, but tiger isn't his animal to call and the only vampire we have who's able to walk in the day isn't a master of anything."
"Your vampire servant, Damian, right, he's your day walker?"
"Yeah."
"And who made him a day walker? It wasn't Jean-Claude, no offense to your Master of the City; it was you that made a weak vampire able to do one of the rarest feats among us bloodsuckers."
"Yeah, but . . ."
"We're not sending our boys to Jean-Claude, Anita. We're sending them to you. Though Auggie of Chicago says we should send him some of our women, something about maybe he'd inherit your power to call tiger like you inherited his ability to call wolf."
"What?" I asked.
There was noise on the other end of the phone. Cloth moving and Max saying, "You okay to do this, Bibi?"
A moment later Chang-Bibi of the White Tiger Clan was on the phone, so I guess she was okay to do this. Or Max couldn't stop her from taking the phone. Sometimes he loved his wife a little too much.
"Anita," and her voice was tear-filled, almost hiccupy with emotion. Since she was one of the scariest weretigers I'd ever met, that was not comforting.
"Hey, Bibiana, I mean, Chang-Bibi."
"It is too late for titles between us, Anita." She took a shaky breath and said, "You must embrace my tigers when they arrive. You must bring the tigers with you into their full power."
"I know that you wanted that, but the other tiger clans don't want you favored above everyone else."
"All their Changs have had the same nightmare that I had, Anita. They have seen the Darkness, and they remember in the heart of them when she tried to rule us all. The Father of the Day, he saved us. He controlled us and kept her from harnessing all the power of the tigers. She only defeated him by destroying the last golden queen."
"How do you know all that now? You didn't know it before."
"It was legend, fairy tales, Anita. I didn't believe in stories of the Living Dark, a dark Goddess, and a God of Living Light, who created our people. Who believes such things?"
She had me there. I mean, I know as a good little Christian I should really buy all that Old Testament stuff, but I thought of it as representative stories trying to explain why a God of Love would make a world where people suffered so much.
"But now you believe," I said.
"What choice do I have?" She sounded bitter.
"What did you dream?" I asked.
"No, to talk of such things gives them power, but it was only the Light, the God, that kept us from her power the first time. It was the combined power of all the tiger clans that gave him the power to keep her from conquering the world."
"Look, Bibiana, we're all shook, but being able to call a little electricity and fire isn't going to defeat Mommie Dearest."
"You have only seen what the weaker of my clan can do, Anita. You haven't even seen what Domino's black tiger side is capable of, but if the Master of Tigers and the Consuming Darkness are real, then the powers that our clans once had must be true, too."
"Bibiana, come on," I said.
"The red tiger you slept with can call fire to his hand, he's a pyrokinetic. They exist even today among the humans."
"Fine, I'll give you that, but white tiger is all metals, and it seems to be basically really uber-static electricity. It's not a weapon."
"Black tiger is water, Anita. The human body is made up mostly of water."
"What are you saying?" I asked.
"I'm saying you have only begun to touch the surface of what we are capable of if you give us back all our powers."
"Cynric hasn't gotten any new powers."
"He's young and you only slept with him once, Anita."
"Once was plenty," I said.
"Blue tiger is the power of air. Legend says that Blue could raise storms and make them obey their will. The golden tigers controlled earth and all energies upon it."
"What does that mean?"
"They could make the very ground obey their will."
"You mean earthquakes?" I didn't even try to keep the disbelief out of my voice.
"One of the council members that Jean-Claude defeated in St. Louis was called the Earthmover, Anita; what do you think he did?"
I licked my lips; I didn't have a good answer, because she was right. The only thing that had kept the duel from turning St. Louis into a pile of rubble was the Earthmover giving his word of honor that he wouldn't use that particular power to defeat Jean-Claude. He'd actually won the duel, but he'd made the mistake of breaking my vampire marks to Jean-Claude and making me belong to his vampire lieutenant. His mistake had been thinking I'd put a stake through Jean-Claude's heart and not risk my own death killing them. They had misjudged me.
"Okay, say that Cynric could call storms, I'm not sure how I feel about a seventeen-year-old with that kind of power in my city."
"But it won't be his power, Anita, it will come to you. If you raise it in the tigers it will come to you, and you will be too powerful for the Darkness to eat."
"I'm not a vampire, Bibiana."
"But you are, you just don't drink blood, Anita. The time for pretty lies is past. The hour is late, Anita, and the Darkness is coming. If you do not save us she will possess all the tigers, including you, and once she has a golden queen - you - as her vessel, she will destroy us all."
"I am not a weretiger. I can't shift."
"Yellow was meant to be our ruler over all, a sort of High Queen. Some say that the power to move the ground is only to the Yellow. We won't know for certain until you bring more of us into our full power."
"Bibiana, this is all speculation. You don't know that any of this is possible."
"Do not doubt it, Anita. You must believe. It must be real. You must be able to harness the power of all the clans. You must."
"I don't must," I said.
"Yes, you must, because if you fail us, the Darkness will rise up and consume the world. It was she who destroyed the yellow tigers so long ago. It was the Darkness who whispered evil in the ear of the First Emperor. She knew once we lost the golden, that the Master of Tigers wouldn't have enough power to stand against her. She crushed him, and nearly destroyed us as a people of any color."
"Do you know how she ended up in the . . . coma in the caverns?" Because that had been where her body lay, in a cavern where only torchlight touched. The vampire council had tried to abandon her a few times when world wars forced them to move countries, but there had been a compulsion that wouldn't let them leave her body behind. But none of the vampires knew why she had fallen into the "sleep." They only knew one night she had not woken. For over a thousand years she'd slept, until now.
"If all the legend is true, then it was her own guards that did it. Those who the vampires are not allowed to name. She let some of them keep their golden tigers as animal to call, because she believed them to be totally loyal to her."
"How did they make her sleep?"
"The story speaks of a spell and a sacrifice of lives. They meant to slay her, but they could not."
"Would not, as in pity moved them, or could not, as in she couldn't die?"
"They couldn't figure out how to kill her permanently. They tied her to the body she last inhabited and left her there."
"Why would the guards tell the tigers?"
"So that if they were all lost, there would be some memory of what happened and what would be needed to defeat her."
"Bibiana, I can't be some sort of weretiger savior."
"Not savior, Anita, master. You must be the Mistress of Tigers. You must be the daywalking vampire who defeats the night once and for all."
I asked what I'd been thinking since it happened. "Does your legend tell how to kill the Darkness, or how to put her back to sleep?"
"The guards that have no name still exist; ask them."
I nodded, and glanced at the bedside table. In the top drawer was my cross and a very ancient piece of metal. The Nameless Vampire Guards were the Harlequin. They'd given me the charm the first time the Mother of All Darkness had messed with me. It was supposed to keep her out of my head and my body. It worked, but it had to be cleansed and recharged periodically, like a gun that needed reloading. My cross just worked, but then it was about faith, and the charm with its imprint of a many-headed tiger on it was magic, not faith. The more witches I knew, the more I realized that there was a difference.
The Harlequin were so scary that simply mentioning them by name could bring them to your door with permission to kill you. They were the elite among vampires, strong enough to have territories of their own, or even be council members, but choosing to cut all ties to their bloodlines and be a combination spy, police, and execution service for the vampire community. Supposedly only the council could set them in motion, but was that still true, or had the Mother of All Darkness already taken back her guards? If she had, we were cooked, done; it was finished before it began. Mommie Dearest was still weak, weaker than she'd been before the council hired mercenaries to blow her to kingdom come. In the past she'd possessed me directly and more easily. Maybe the loss of her body hadn't destroyed her completely, but it had weakened her. She needed the other vampires to talk to us, possess us. If there was a way to destroy her once and for all, we had to do it fast.
"Anita, are you there?"
"I'm sorry, Bibiana, you've just given me a lot to process. I'm thinking."
"Do not think too long, Anita. I will contact the other queens of the clans. I will urge them to send people to you. Our only hope lies in a swift rise to power."
"I haven't agreed to all this, you know that."
"I know, and I know that you are skeptical by nature, but there is no time, Anita. Our time to hesitate has been lost. We have only action before us, and I pray that it is swift action on your part."
"So I what, fuck everyone into their next power level like some pornographic computer game?" I made sure my voice held all the scorn I could manage. I was good at scorn, it was one of my best things. Nathaniel and Damian touched me at the same time, soothing me with their hands and their nearness. Asher put his head in my lap, as if I weren't covered in gunk. With all the terrible things that had happened, he seemed determined to concentrate on the good things. It wasn't like him to be cheerful, but it was like him to be sensual.
Bibiana made a clucking noise at me. "Make all the jokes you wish, but do what we need you to do, or the next time the Dark visits our dreams she will begin to possess the queens of the clans."
"She can't possess anybody who isn't a vampire," I said.
"Why, because the council member known as the Traveller is so limited?" It was Bibiana's turn to sound scornful.
"Yes," I said, my voice no longer so certain.
She laughed, but it was a harsh sound. "You still do not understand what she is; she is one of the first. She has powers that the others mimic, but none of them hold the same level of ability. They are all but pale imitations of her. She can and will possess someone who is not a vampire if it serves her purpose."
"Humans?" I asked.
"I don't believe so. I believe it is vampires and werecats. Her animals to call and her people are all steeds for her to ride if we allow her to grow powerful enough."
"A lot of this is guesswork, Bibiana."
"If Adam and Eve suddenly walked in your door, would you not have to believe in the serpent?"
"What?" I asked.
"This is a story as old to the tigers as the Garden of Eden is to the humans. We believed our story was a metaphor, too, but when the evil from that story turns out to be real, then the story is simply true, Anita. The story is true, and you must process, or whatever word you choose, that fact immediately, and act upon that truth. You must do this for us, Anita, or she will take the vampires one by one, and then she will move against the tigers and take them, too, and when she has that much power to wield she will rise up and cover the world in Darkness. Do you not understand that?"
"Every creation story has an end-of-the-world clause, Bibiana. It's usually just stories of floods or earthquakes that were local to the original people. Disasters that seemed world-destroying, but if you traveled a hundred miles it wasn't."
"You have felt her power, Anita. You have felt that she does not love, or care; she is an intellect and a nearly pure sociopath. She cares only for her own pain; all else is just toys for her to use, not real people, real beings. Do you really believe that she will stop with the destruction of just the vampires?"
I let the silence build as the tight, cold lump in my stomach grew and spread in chills over my skin. "No."
"Then stop trying to throw logic at nightmares. Sometimes the monsters are real, Anita. Sometimes they're real and the only way to defeat them is to be the bigger monster."
"Wait, if I could do all you said, why would I be the bigger monster?"
"Do you really believe that you could hold all that power and resist the temptation to use it?"
"Yes."
"Anita." She said my name the way my stepmother had said it when I was about fifteen.
"Don't you want me to use the power if I could get it? Isn't that the point?"
"Yes, but I'm not just trusting you with the power, Anita. I trust that once you've used it to defeat the Dark, you won't turn all that light and power against us. I'm trusting in your sense of honor and morality as much as I'm trusting in your psychic abilities."
"You've only met me once. That's a lot of trust."
"I put my son, and Cynric, the only known blue tiger in existence, and some of our most powerful weretigers on a plane this morning. If I didn't have faith in you, would I send you such precious things?"
I didn't know what to say to that. Arguing that she was wrong seemed ungrateful; thank you seemed inadequate. What do you say when someone trusts you like that?
"I'll do my best not to hurt anyone."
"See, Anita, not that you will do your best, but that you will do your best not to hurt anyone. You believe your moral compass is broken because of the sex, but I believe if you can get past the idea of it being a sin, your moral compass points true north."
"Don't put all your faith in me, Bibiana."
"Where else can I put it?"
And to that, there really wasn't anything else to say. It wasn't that I minded so much trying to save the world, but the idea that if I failed there was no backup plan . . . We needed a backup plan.
