Cherish Hard
Page 58
And still she wanted to believe. She loved him too much not to grasp at even the thinnest straw of hope. “What about the weekends?” Except for those magical five years with her grandmother, Ísa had spent countless hours alone as a child; the idea of repeating that existence was her personal nightmare.
Especially when it was Sailor she’d be missing.
“You could come with me,” Sailor said, his hand still locked possessively around her own. “After your work with Jacqueline is finished, you could grade papers and write your poetry while I landscaped.”
When Ísa parted her lips—to say what, she wasn’t sure—he shook his head. “Try, Ísa. Please.”
It was the wrenching emotion in that last word that got to her.
Shaken by the raw power of it, she went against her every instinct and nodded. “When do you start your work schedule from hell?”
Hauling her into his lap, he thrust his hand into her hair, sent it tumbling around her shoulders. “I won’t let you down, spitfire.” A kiss that stole her will, threatened to steal all her own dreams, threatened to splinter her to pieces.
“I’ve already begun,” he told her afterward as she lay curled in his lap. “But I’ll have a break early in the new year—I made a promise to my dad months ago that I’d go on a family camping trip. Come with me?”
Shoving down her fear of being left behind in favor of bigger dreams, Ísa nodded. Because when Ísa Rain agreed to try something, she did so with her whole heart and soul. No regrets. No hesitation. “Yes,” she said on a wave of determination as potent as Sailor’s after stuffing her pain into a box and locking it shut. “I’ll come.”
Sailor kissed her knuckles again. And in his eyes, she saw a shadow that made her heart twist. He was hiding something else. “Sailor?” She scowled at him. “Talk to me.” It was a demand.
“Not tonight, Ísa.” Almost a plea. “Tonight let’s just be us.”
Not dropping her scowl, Ísa nonetheless ran her fingers through his hair. “You’re on notice, Sailor Bishop. If you want me to be yours, then you be mine.” She pressed her nose to his. “You talk to me.”
A softening of his lips, a slight curve. “I’ll talk at camp, boss lady,” he said. “I promise.”
Ísa would hold him to that promise. And she’d fight her hardest to hold on to every sexy, sweet, funny, powerful thing between them. Giving up was not in her vocabulary. Even when it might be good for her.
Just as well she didn’t own a diaphanous white gown.
Standards
A woman must have standards
Filmy white gowns might be all the rage
For madness or a nervous breakdown
But darling, black is far more dramatic
And lends gravitas to your insanity
~ Ísalind Rain
34
Happy New Year
ONLY DAYS LATER, THE NEW year roared in on a blast of summer heat… and a kiss that ignited Ísa’s blood to boiling point. Sailor had worked all day, but he was there for her at midnight, the two of them standing on the roof of her apartment building while, in the distance, fireworks erupted in splashes of light and color from Auckland’s Sky Tower.
“Are you making any new-year resolutions?” she whispered after the kiss while the fireworks still bloomed and her romantic heart dreamed of kisses into forever.
Expression solemn, Sailor cupped her cheek. “To kiss my Ísalind as much as possible.”
No, she stood no chance.
Rising on tiptoe, Ísa touched her lips to his as the balmy summer breeze twined around them, and all across the country, lovers kissed.
35
Ísa and Nayna and a Bottle of Tequila
TWO DAYS LATER, WHEN ÍSA finally made it home—after nine that night—it was to find Nayna sitting in her car outside Ísa’s apartment building.
Ísa had stayed late at the office to work on the Case of the Dastardly Leaker, as dubbed by Catie with a little help from Harlow. Both had decided “spy” was far too sophisticated a title. According to them, “Leaker” was way more low class. As to how they’d figured out the investigation was occurring, it wasn’t exactly rocket science if you knew Jacqueline and how she’d react to such a breach.
“And who else would she ask to look into it but you?” Harlow had said guilelessly. “Family is everything to you, Ísa.”
Her sweet, occasionally goofy brother had hit the painful nail right on the head.
Shrugging off the unintended blow and her dream of standing on firm ground that would never shift—with a mate who always saw her—hidden protectively deep, she’d continued to work. She didn’t have Jacqueline’s labyrinthine contacts, but she had an English degree. It so happened that one of her classmates had ended up a journalist who worked for the newspaper that had printed the story.
When she’d called him up to ask about the newspaper’s policies, he’d said, “We don’t pay for information, doesn’t matter what the story. That’s what separates us from the tabloids.”
That little piece of information had thrown a wrench in all her theories. She was still chewing over it when she pulled into the apartment block’s parking lot and saw Nayna’s car in a guest spot. Her friend was sitting inside.
Getting out of her own car, Ísa walked over to tap on the other woman’s window.
Nayna visibly jumped. “Jeez,” she said after scrambling out. “You gave me such a fright. I was away with the fairies.”
“How long have you been waiting?”
“Not long, just five minutes. I was going to call, see if you were home, but I decided to sit and brood in my car first.”
“Come brood with me instead,” Ísa said, her mind filled with thoughts of a certain blue-eyed gardener who made her do crazy things like decide to try to make their relationship work even though it was surely doomed.
Once inside Ísa’s apartment, both their purses down and shoes kicked off, Ísa made them a pot of tea.
“Mr. Blue Eyes coming over tonight?” Nayna asked.
“No, he promised to take his younger brothers to a late movie.” Ísa loved Sailor all the more for being such a good big brother, for carving out that time even when he was pushing himself to the limit from dawn to well past dusk. It wasn’t family commitments that had ever worried her—family was Ísa’s lifeblood. “Now sit. Talk.”
Settling into the sofa at Ísa’s side, Nayna said, “I need to get away” with a narrow-eyed expression on her face. “You know what I’ve realized? Raj is obstinate as hell in a quiet way. He’s decided on me and he’s not budging.”
“And you’re not sure yet?”
“I want to strip him naked and jump his bones like a sex maniac. Plus it turns out I like his brains.” Nayna gulped her tea down like it was whiskey. “But there’s all this other stuff in my head that’s making it hard to think.”
Slamming the teacup on the coffee table, she got up and began to pace, her breathing choppy. “Last night I got home to find my sister sitting at the kitchen table again, chatting away to my father. I love her, but at that instant I wanted to scream at her for ruining my life.”
A harsh exhale. “And that was when I realized she hadn’t done anything to me. This is my life, and I’m the one who’s screwed it up.” Slumping back on the sofa, she folded her arms, her expression set. “I’m taking some extra vacation time, getting the hell out of here so I can clear my head. I’ve already okayed it with my bosses.”
Especially when it was Sailor she’d be missing.
“You could come with me,” Sailor said, his hand still locked possessively around her own. “After your work with Jacqueline is finished, you could grade papers and write your poetry while I landscaped.”
When Ísa parted her lips—to say what, she wasn’t sure—he shook his head. “Try, Ísa. Please.”
It was the wrenching emotion in that last word that got to her.
Shaken by the raw power of it, she went against her every instinct and nodded. “When do you start your work schedule from hell?”
Hauling her into his lap, he thrust his hand into her hair, sent it tumbling around her shoulders. “I won’t let you down, spitfire.” A kiss that stole her will, threatened to steal all her own dreams, threatened to splinter her to pieces.
“I’ve already begun,” he told her afterward as she lay curled in his lap. “But I’ll have a break early in the new year—I made a promise to my dad months ago that I’d go on a family camping trip. Come with me?”
Shoving down her fear of being left behind in favor of bigger dreams, Ísa nodded. Because when Ísa Rain agreed to try something, she did so with her whole heart and soul. No regrets. No hesitation. “Yes,” she said on a wave of determination as potent as Sailor’s after stuffing her pain into a box and locking it shut. “I’ll come.”
Sailor kissed her knuckles again. And in his eyes, she saw a shadow that made her heart twist. He was hiding something else. “Sailor?” She scowled at him. “Talk to me.” It was a demand.
“Not tonight, Ísa.” Almost a plea. “Tonight let’s just be us.”
Not dropping her scowl, Ísa nonetheless ran her fingers through his hair. “You’re on notice, Sailor Bishop. If you want me to be yours, then you be mine.” She pressed her nose to his. “You talk to me.”
A softening of his lips, a slight curve. “I’ll talk at camp, boss lady,” he said. “I promise.”
Ísa would hold him to that promise. And she’d fight her hardest to hold on to every sexy, sweet, funny, powerful thing between them. Giving up was not in her vocabulary. Even when it might be good for her.
Just as well she didn’t own a diaphanous white gown.
Standards
A woman must have standards
Filmy white gowns might be all the rage
For madness or a nervous breakdown
But darling, black is far more dramatic
And lends gravitas to your insanity
~ Ísalind Rain
34
Happy New Year
ONLY DAYS LATER, THE NEW year roared in on a blast of summer heat… and a kiss that ignited Ísa’s blood to boiling point. Sailor had worked all day, but he was there for her at midnight, the two of them standing on the roof of her apartment building while, in the distance, fireworks erupted in splashes of light and color from Auckland’s Sky Tower.
“Are you making any new-year resolutions?” she whispered after the kiss while the fireworks still bloomed and her romantic heart dreamed of kisses into forever.
Expression solemn, Sailor cupped her cheek. “To kiss my Ísalind as much as possible.”
No, she stood no chance.
Rising on tiptoe, Ísa touched her lips to his as the balmy summer breeze twined around them, and all across the country, lovers kissed.
35
Ísa and Nayna and a Bottle of Tequila
TWO DAYS LATER, WHEN ÍSA finally made it home—after nine that night—it was to find Nayna sitting in her car outside Ísa’s apartment building.
Ísa had stayed late at the office to work on the Case of the Dastardly Leaker, as dubbed by Catie with a little help from Harlow. Both had decided “spy” was far too sophisticated a title. According to them, “Leaker” was way more low class. As to how they’d figured out the investigation was occurring, it wasn’t exactly rocket science if you knew Jacqueline and how she’d react to such a breach.
“And who else would she ask to look into it but you?” Harlow had said guilelessly. “Family is everything to you, Ísa.”
Her sweet, occasionally goofy brother had hit the painful nail right on the head.
Shrugging off the unintended blow and her dream of standing on firm ground that would never shift—with a mate who always saw her—hidden protectively deep, she’d continued to work. She didn’t have Jacqueline’s labyrinthine contacts, but she had an English degree. It so happened that one of her classmates had ended up a journalist who worked for the newspaper that had printed the story.
When she’d called him up to ask about the newspaper’s policies, he’d said, “We don’t pay for information, doesn’t matter what the story. That’s what separates us from the tabloids.”
That little piece of information had thrown a wrench in all her theories. She was still chewing over it when she pulled into the apartment block’s parking lot and saw Nayna’s car in a guest spot. Her friend was sitting inside.
Getting out of her own car, Ísa walked over to tap on the other woman’s window.
Nayna visibly jumped. “Jeez,” she said after scrambling out. “You gave me such a fright. I was away with the fairies.”
“How long have you been waiting?”
“Not long, just five minutes. I was going to call, see if you were home, but I decided to sit and brood in my car first.”
“Come brood with me instead,” Ísa said, her mind filled with thoughts of a certain blue-eyed gardener who made her do crazy things like decide to try to make their relationship work even though it was surely doomed.
Once inside Ísa’s apartment, both their purses down and shoes kicked off, Ísa made them a pot of tea.
“Mr. Blue Eyes coming over tonight?” Nayna asked.
“No, he promised to take his younger brothers to a late movie.” Ísa loved Sailor all the more for being such a good big brother, for carving out that time even when he was pushing himself to the limit from dawn to well past dusk. It wasn’t family commitments that had ever worried her—family was Ísa’s lifeblood. “Now sit. Talk.”
Settling into the sofa at Ísa’s side, Nayna said, “I need to get away” with a narrow-eyed expression on her face. “You know what I’ve realized? Raj is obstinate as hell in a quiet way. He’s decided on me and he’s not budging.”
“And you’re not sure yet?”
“I want to strip him naked and jump his bones like a sex maniac. Plus it turns out I like his brains.” Nayna gulped her tea down like it was whiskey. “But there’s all this other stuff in my head that’s making it hard to think.”
Slamming the teacup on the coffee table, she got up and began to pace, her breathing choppy. “Last night I got home to find my sister sitting at the kitchen table again, chatting away to my father. I love her, but at that instant I wanted to scream at her for ruining my life.”
A harsh exhale. “And that was when I realized she hadn’t done anything to me. This is my life, and I’m the one who’s screwed it up.” Slumping back on the sofa, she folded her arms, her expression set. “I’m taking some extra vacation time, getting the hell out of here so I can clear my head. I’ve already okayed it with my bosses.”
