Chesapeake Blue
Page 30
"No." But it worked a smile out of Seth. "Just tell her I'm thinking about what happens next. I've got to get a place of my own sooner or later. My rep's bugging me about putting together another showing, and I'm not sure what direction I want to take there. I haven't even finished putting the studio together yet."
"Uh-huh." Cam glanced toward shore, and the pretty old house tucked back on the banks of the river. When Seth followed the look, he shifted in the bow. He'd been so wrapped up in the sail, he hadn't noticed the direction.
"Sexy flower queen's not home yet," Cam commented. "Maybe she's got a date."
"She doesn't date."
"Is that why you haven't moved on her yet?"
"Who says I haven't?"
Cam only laughed, sipped beer. "If you had, kid, you'd look a hell of a lot more relaxed." Got me there, Seth thought, but shrugged.
"In fact, I can drop you off here. You can try the 'I was just in the neighborhood so can I come in and get you naked' gambit."
"That one ever work for you?"
"Ah." Cam let out a long, wistful sigh, stared up at the sky as if into deep, dreamy memories. "The stories I could tell. The way I figure it, the more a guy gets sex, the more he thinks about it. And the less a guy gets sex, the more he thinks about it. But at least when he's getting it, he sleeps better." Seth patted his pockets. "Got a pen? I want to write that one down."
"She's a very tasty morsel."
Amusement fled. "She's not a f**king snack."
"Okay." Having nailed the answer he wanted, Cam nodded. "I wondered if you were really tangled up about her."
Seth hissed out a breath, looked back toward the fanciful blue house tucked among the trees until it was out of sight. "I don't know what I am. I've got to get my life settled, and until I do, I don't have time for…
tangles. But I look at her and…" He shrugged. "I can't figure it out. I like being around her. Not that she's easy. Half the time it's like dealing with a porcupine. One in a tiara."
"Women without spines are fine for a one-nighter, or a good time. But when you're looking for the long haul…"
Shock and panic erupted on Seth's face. "I didn't say that. I just said I liked being around her."
"And you got puppy eyes when you said it."
"Bullshit." And the fact that he could feel the heat of a flush working up his neck mortified him. He could only hope the light was too dim for Cam to spot it.
"Another minute, you'd've whimpered. You going to trim that jib, or just let her reef?" Muttering to himself, Seth adjusted the lines. "Look, I want to paint her, I want to spend some time with her. And I want to get her into bed. I can manage all three on my own, thanks."
"If you do, maybe you'll start sleeping better."
"Dru doesn't have anything to do with how I'm sleeping. Or not much anyway." Cam came about again and headed toward home. Twilight was falling. "So are you going to tell me what's keeping you up at night, or do I have to pry that out of you, too? You don't tell me, Anna's going to make both of our lives hell until you spill it."
He thought of Gloria, and the words crammed in his throat. If he let the first one out, the rest wouldn't just spill. It would be an avalanche. All he could see was his family buried under it. He could tell Cam anything. Anything but that.
But maybe it was time to unload something else. "I had this really weird dream."
"Are we going back to sex?" Cam asked. "Because if we are we should've brought more beer along."
"I dreamed about Stella."
The wicked humor on Cam's face drained, leaving it naked and vulnerable. "Mom? You dreamed about Mom?"
"I know it's weird. I never even met her."
"What was she…" It was strange how grief could hide inside you. Like a virus, laying low for months, even years, only to spring out and leave you weak and helpless again. "What were you doing?"
"Sitting on the dock in back of the house. It was summer. Hot, sweaty, close. I was fishing, just a pole and a line and some of
Anna's Brie."
"You'd better've been dreaming," Cam managed. "Or you're a dead man."
"See, that's the thing. The line's in the water, but I knew I'd copped the cheese for bait. And I could smell roses, feel the heat of the sun. Then Foolish plops down next to me. I know he's gone—I mean in the dream I know—so I'm pretty damn surprised to see him. Next thing I know Stella's sitting on the dock beside me."
"How did she look?"
It didn't seem like an odd question while they were gliding along on quiet water in the dimming light. It seemed perfectly rational. "She looked terrific. She had on this old khaki hat, no brim. The kind you just yank down over your head, and her hair was falling all out of it."
"Jesus." Cam remembered the old hat, and the way she'd stuffed her unmanageable hair under it. Did they have a picture of her in that ugly cap? He couldn't recall. "I don't want to mess you up with this." Cam only shook his head. "What happened in the dream?"
"Not a whole lot. We just sat there and talked. About you guys, and Ray and…"
"What?"
"How they figured it was time she got to play Grandma, since she'd missed out on that before. It wasn't what we said so much as how real it seemed. Even when I woke up sitting on the side of the bed, it seemed real. I don't know how to explain it."
"No, I get you." Hadn't he had a number of conversations with his father, after Ray had died? And hadn't his brothers both had similar experiences?
But it had been so long now. Longer yet since they'd lost their mother. And none of them had ever had that wrenching chance to talk to her again. Even in dreams.
"I always wanted to meet her," Seth continued. "It feels like I have."
"How long ago was this?"
"Last week, I guess. And before you start, I didn't say anything at the time because I figured you might freak. You gotta admit, it's a little spooky."
You ain't seen nothing yet, Cam thought. But that was one of the aspects of being a Quinn Seth would have to find out on his own.
"Uh-huh." Cam glanced toward shore, and the pretty old house tucked back on the banks of the river. When Seth followed the look, he shifted in the bow. He'd been so wrapped up in the sail, he hadn't noticed the direction.
"Sexy flower queen's not home yet," Cam commented. "Maybe she's got a date."
"She doesn't date."
"Is that why you haven't moved on her yet?"
"Who says I haven't?"
Cam only laughed, sipped beer. "If you had, kid, you'd look a hell of a lot more relaxed." Got me there, Seth thought, but shrugged.
"In fact, I can drop you off here. You can try the 'I was just in the neighborhood so can I come in and get you naked' gambit."
"That one ever work for you?"
"Ah." Cam let out a long, wistful sigh, stared up at the sky as if into deep, dreamy memories. "The stories I could tell. The way I figure it, the more a guy gets sex, the more he thinks about it. And the less a guy gets sex, the more he thinks about it. But at least when he's getting it, he sleeps better." Seth patted his pockets. "Got a pen? I want to write that one down."
"She's a very tasty morsel."
Amusement fled. "She's not a f**king snack."
"Okay." Having nailed the answer he wanted, Cam nodded. "I wondered if you were really tangled up about her."
Seth hissed out a breath, looked back toward the fanciful blue house tucked among the trees until it was out of sight. "I don't know what I am. I've got to get my life settled, and until I do, I don't have time for…
tangles. But I look at her and…" He shrugged. "I can't figure it out. I like being around her. Not that she's easy. Half the time it's like dealing with a porcupine. One in a tiara."
"Women without spines are fine for a one-nighter, or a good time. But when you're looking for the long haul…"
Shock and panic erupted on Seth's face. "I didn't say that. I just said I liked being around her."
"And you got puppy eyes when you said it."
"Bullshit." And the fact that he could feel the heat of a flush working up his neck mortified him. He could only hope the light was too dim for Cam to spot it.
"Another minute, you'd've whimpered. You going to trim that jib, or just let her reef?" Muttering to himself, Seth adjusted the lines. "Look, I want to paint her, I want to spend some time with her. And I want to get her into bed. I can manage all three on my own, thanks."
"If you do, maybe you'll start sleeping better."
"Dru doesn't have anything to do with how I'm sleeping. Or not much anyway." Cam came about again and headed toward home. Twilight was falling. "So are you going to tell me what's keeping you up at night, or do I have to pry that out of you, too? You don't tell me, Anna's going to make both of our lives hell until you spill it."
He thought of Gloria, and the words crammed in his throat. If he let the first one out, the rest wouldn't just spill. It would be an avalanche. All he could see was his family buried under it. He could tell Cam anything. Anything but that.
But maybe it was time to unload something else. "I had this really weird dream."
"Are we going back to sex?" Cam asked. "Because if we are we should've brought more beer along."
"I dreamed about Stella."
The wicked humor on Cam's face drained, leaving it naked and vulnerable. "Mom? You dreamed about Mom?"
"I know it's weird. I never even met her."
"What was she…" It was strange how grief could hide inside you. Like a virus, laying low for months, even years, only to spring out and leave you weak and helpless again. "What were you doing?"
"Sitting on the dock in back of the house. It was summer. Hot, sweaty, close. I was fishing, just a pole and a line and some of
Anna's Brie."
"You'd better've been dreaming," Cam managed. "Or you're a dead man."
"See, that's the thing. The line's in the water, but I knew I'd copped the cheese for bait. And I could smell roses, feel the heat of the sun. Then Foolish plops down next to me. I know he's gone—I mean in the dream I know—so I'm pretty damn surprised to see him. Next thing I know Stella's sitting on the dock beside me."
"How did she look?"
It didn't seem like an odd question while they were gliding along on quiet water in the dimming light. It seemed perfectly rational. "She looked terrific. She had on this old khaki hat, no brim. The kind you just yank down over your head, and her hair was falling all out of it."
"Jesus." Cam remembered the old hat, and the way she'd stuffed her unmanageable hair under it. Did they have a picture of her in that ugly cap? He couldn't recall. "I don't want to mess you up with this." Cam only shook his head. "What happened in the dream?"
"Not a whole lot. We just sat there and talked. About you guys, and Ray and…"
"What?"
"How they figured it was time she got to play Grandma, since she'd missed out on that before. It wasn't what we said so much as how real it seemed. Even when I woke up sitting on the side of the bed, it seemed real. I don't know how to explain it."
"No, I get you." Hadn't he had a number of conversations with his father, after Ray had died? And hadn't his brothers both had similar experiences?
But it had been so long now. Longer yet since they'd lost their mother. And none of them had ever had that wrenching chance to talk to her again. Even in dreams.
"I always wanted to meet her," Seth continued. "It feels like I have."
"How long ago was this?"
"Last week, I guess. And before you start, I didn't say anything at the time because I figured you might freak. You gotta admit, it's a little spooky."
You ain't seen nothing yet, Cam thought. But that was one of the aspects of being a Quinn Seth would have to find out on his own.
