Clipped by Love
Page 80
I mean, like my heart was coming out of my chest, fireworks going off around his head, and little hearts swimming around us. It was utterly girlie and disgusting but…I liked it. A lot. More than I would ever want to admit, and I tried to hide my face to try to get my wits about me, but he kept coming at me. Line after line that wasn’t a line. He spoke from his heart, and a little piece of me just broke. Now, I’m not saying I’m falling for the guy, but man, he is making it hard not to.
But I can’t let that happen.
I fell way too hard before. Like face first in love with Seth, and I won’t allow that to happen. Not until I am completely sure that Jayden is it. When I look at him and know that I can’t go on without him is when I’ll allow myself to fall. Until then though, I’m gonna keep my heart locked up tight behind my ribs. That’s my plan, at least. But when I look across the locker room, watching as his arms flex with each pull of his laces, a little piece of me knows I’m fighting a losing battle. But I’m gonna fight it. I have to.
Because if I fall, I’ll fall hard, and that scares the bejesus out of me.
Looking up, his eyes meet mine and a little grin pulls at his lips as his cheeks fill with color. It’s adorable and completely unlike him, but it gives me chills to know I’ve caused it. For the last couple nights, we’ve been watching TV together with only stolen touches here and there. Jace and Markus are on to us, and we keep having to throw them off. I even sat on the other end of the bed last night, which pissed him off, but it needed to be done.
We have to keep this a secret, not only for me but for him too. I can’t let what happened to Seth happen to Jayden. No matter if he hurts me, I can’t let his career suffer. He cares for so many people, he cares for me, and even when I was being a bitch to him, he looked out for me. I have to look out for him. It’s the only right thing to do, and this is the only way I feel. At least until I know that he isn’t going anywhere, and then I’ll discuss it with my dad.
Which has my heart palpitating in my chest.
But then I remember that we are at the rink. It’s time for business, and quickly, I tie up my skates before finishing getting dressed. I hit the ice first, which I like, gives me time to warm up before the warm-up. As I skate around, I stretch out my neck and back, but somehow, I know exactly when Jayden’s skates hit the ice. He doesn’t skate with me, which I’m a little disappointed by. Then I mentally kick myself for that since I am the one pushing for him to keep this quiet, but then Markus is skating with me. And really, it’s hard to be disappointed or sad when Markus is around.
He’s a riot.
“So, ready for the dance team tryouts?” he asks, doing the robot, and I raise an eyebrow.
“What?” I ask, confused. Surely they don’t expect me to dance. I’m a hockey player, for shit’s sake!
“We get to help pick the dancers for the dance team. It’s like the best part of being on the team.”
“Oh,” I say with a chuckle, but then I look at him, deadpan. “Yeah, no, that doesn’t excite me.”
Especially since I know that wrestler chick is trying out.
Bitch.
Markus laughs at that while shaking his head. “Well, get excited.”
“Yeah, I’ll work on that,” I say offhandedly as my dad blows the whistle.
Then it’s time to work.
Practice is no different than it usually is. It’s hard, it’s ruthless, and I spend most of my time breathless. I wish I could say it was because of the strenuous workout, but it has a lot to do with watching Jayden shoot a puck. He is absolutely the hottest dude I’ve ever seen shoot a puck. His whole body moves, and then like a strike of lightning, the puck is flying toward the net, going past Shane in an effortless way. He isn’t out of breath. He’s a fucking beast! It’s insane.
And so fucking hot.
“Fastest shot I’ve seen in the college league,” Dad calls out with a shake of his head, and pride bursts in my chest. “Good job, Sinclair.”
Yup, I had sex with that guy last night.
“Why are you grinning like that?” Jace asks, and my grin drops.
“Shut up,” I say, throwing my shoulder into his chest and knocking him into the board.
“Hey!”
“Hey,” I say back as I skate backward, sending him a playful grin.
Dad blows the whistle and then we are running drills. I skate down ice fast with Jace and Markus. Jace carries the puck, but when he is about to shoot, someone poke checks it out, but then Jayden is there, stealing it back, turning before quickly sending it to me. I knew he was going to do it, so I’m ready, and just as quickly as he passes it, I slap shot it into the back of the goal with ease.
“Great shot, Moore,” he calls to me and I nod.
“Thanks,” I call out as we set up for the next drill.
Over and over again, we successfully bang out each drill. By the end of practice, my dad is grinning, which doesn’t happen often. Folding his arms across his chest, he looks out at all of us as we gather around him. Everyone is breathing hard and I’m not any better, but Jayden is breathing normally. He really should be in the NHL, but then again, if he were, then I doubt we would have met. Or we probably would have, but I would have never seen him again.
What a depressing thought.
“Great practice, guys, I’m really pleased with the performance today. The lines we have are the lines we’ll play with tomorrow. I’ll announce starters before the game next Friday, so don’t think you have it because you’re on the ice first. Remember—rest, no parties or crazy drinking on practice and game nights. I’m sure our captain has that under control,” he says, his gaze falling on Jayden, and he nods.
“Yes, sir, curfew is being enforced,” he says in his deep, captain’s voice, and chills run down my spine. I wonder what the punishment for skipping curfew would be. I doubt it’d be the sexual kind.
Oh my God, I’m turning into Delanie.
“Good,” he says with a nod. “All right, hit the showers, boys. Except Moore and Sinclair.”
My heart sinks. What the hell did I do?
“Me or him, Coach?” Jace asks, and Dad shakes his head.
“Sorry, Big Sinclair.”
Jayden chuckles as he stands. “Well, he means me.”
“You may be bigger than me, bro, but my dick—” Jace begins, but then my dad cuts him a look and he hightails it off the ice as Jayden comes to stand beside me. He shoots me a look, and I glance at him nervously. Does Dad know? Shit.
But I can’t let that happen.
I fell way too hard before. Like face first in love with Seth, and I won’t allow that to happen. Not until I am completely sure that Jayden is it. When I look at him and know that I can’t go on without him is when I’ll allow myself to fall. Until then though, I’m gonna keep my heart locked up tight behind my ribs. That’s my plan, at least. But when I look across the locker room, watching as his arms flex with each pull of his laces, a little piece of me knows I’m fighting a losing battle. But I’m gonna fight it. I have to.
Because if I fall, I’ll fall hard, and that scares the bejesus out of me.
Looking up, his eyes meet mine and a little grin pulls at his lips as his cheeks fill with color. It’s adorable and completely unlike him, but it gives me chills to know I’ve caused it. For the last couple nights, we’ve been watching TV together with only stolen touches here and there. Jace and Markus are on to us, and we keep having to throw them off. I even sat on the other end of the bed last night, which pissed him off, but it needed to be done.
We have to keep this a secret, not only for me but for him too. I can’t let what happened to Seth happen to Jayden. No matter if he hurts me, I can’t let his career suffer. He cares for so many people, he cares for me, and even when I was being a bitch to him, he looked out for me. I have to look out for him. It’s the only right thing to do, and this is the only way I feel. At least until I know that he isn’t going anywhere, and then I’ll discuss it with my dad.
Which has my heart palpitating in my chest.
But then I remember that we are at the rink. It’s time for business, and quickly, I tie up my skates before finishing getting dressed. I hit the ice first, which I like, gives me time to warm up before the warm-up. As I skate around, I stretch out my neck and back, but somehow, I know exactly when Jayden’s skates hit the ice. He doesn’t skate with me, which I’m a little disappointed by. Then I mentally kick myself for that since I am the one pushing for him to keep this quiet, but then Markus is skating with me. And really, it’s hard to be disappointed or sad when Markus is around.
He’s a riot.
“So, ready for the dance team tryouts?” he asks, doing the robot, and I raise an eyebrow.
“What?” I ask, confused. Surely they don’t expect me to dance. I’m a hockey player, for shit’s sake!
“We get to help pick the dancers for the dance team. It’s like the best part of being on the team.”
“Oh,” I say with a chuckle, but then I look at him, deadpan. “Yeah, no, that doesn’t excite me.”
Especially since I know that wrestler chick is trying out.
Bitch.
Markus laughs at that while shaking his head. “Well, get excited.”
“Yeah, I’ll work on that,” I say offhandedly as my dad blows the whistle.
Then it’s time to work.
Practice is no different than it usually is. It’s hard, it’s ruthless, and I spend most of my time breathless. I wish I could say it was because of the strenuous workout, but it has a lot to do with watching Jayden shoot a puck. He is absolutely the hottest dude I’ve ever seen shoot a puck. His whole body moves, and then like a strike of lightning, the puck is flying toward the net, going past Shane in an effortless way. He isn’t out of breath. He’s a fucking beast! It’s insane.
And so fucking hot.
“Fastest shot I’ve seen in the college league,” Dad calls out with a shake of his head, and pride bursts in my chest. “Good job, Sinclair.”
Yup, I had sex with that guy last night.
“Why are you grinning like that?” Jace asks, and my grin drops.
“Shut up,” I say, throwing my shoulder into his chest and knocking him into the board.
“Hey!”
“Hey,” I say back as I skate backward, sending him a playful grin.
Dad blows the whistle and then we are running drills. I skate down ice fast with Jace and Markus. Jace carries the puck, but when he is about to shoot, someone poke checks it out, but then Jayden is there, stealing it back, turning before quickly sending it to me. I knew he was going to do it, so I’m ready, and just as quickly as he passes it, I slap shot it into the back of the goal with ease.
“Great shot, Moore,” he calls to me and I nod.
“Thanks,” I call out as we set up for the next drill.
Over and over again, we successfully bang out each drill. By the end of practice, my dad is grinning, which doesn’t happen often. Folding his arms across his chest, he looks out at all of us as we gather around him. Everyone is breathing hard and I’m not any better, but Jayden is breathing normally. He really should be in the NHL, but then again, if he were, then I doubt we would have met. Or we probably would have, but I would have never seen him again.
What a depressing thought.
“Great practice, guys, I’m really pleased with the performance today. The lines we have are the lines we’ll play with tomorrow. I’ll announce starters before the game next Friday, so don’t think you have it because you’re on the ice first. Remember—rest, no parties or crazy drinking on practice and game nights. I’m sure our captain has that under control,” he says, his gaze falling on Jayden, and he nods.
“Yes, sir, curfew is being enforced,” he says in his deep, captain’s voice, and chills run down my spine. I wonder what the punishment for skipping curfew would be. I doubt it’d be the sexual kind.
Oh my God, I’m turning into Delanie.
“Good,” he says with a nod. “All right, hit the showers, boys. Except Moore and Sinclair.”
My heart sinks. What the hell did I do?
“Me or him, Coach?” Jace asks, and Dad shakes his head.
“Sorry, Big Sinclair.”
Jayden chuckles as he stands. “Well, he means me.”
“You may be bigger than me, bro, but my dick—” Jace begins, but then my dad cuts him a look and he hightails it off the ice as Jayden comes to stand beside me. He shoots me a look, and I glance at him nervously. Does Dad know? Shit.