Command
Page 3
Lust shone from her eyes and she nodded before leaving me.
I raked my fingers through my hair as I watched her go, and wondered, not for the first time, when I’d have all the pieces of her back – the pieces that had shattered when she’d lost our baby. The pieces she hadn’t been able to find to put back together yet.
I miss those pieces.
As I followed in the direction she’d gone, I vowed yet again to help her find those fucking pieces.
Five hours later, I was sitting outside on the verandah with a beer contemplating club business when Harlow came up behind me, wrapped her arms around me and whispered against my ear, “You wore me out.” I’d had her in the shower and then again in our bed, and fuck, I’d worn myself out, too. She’d fallen asleep for a little while, but I’d been unable to switch my brain off.
She came and curled up in my lap. I put one arm around her and rested my hand holding my beer on her bare leg. She wore only a t-shirt of mine and I fought the urge to rip it off her. First we needed to talk. As she rested her head on my shoulder, I asked, “Did you spend time with the girls today?”
I could hear the smile in her voice when she replied. “Yeah, it was quiet at the café and Mum suggested I take some time off after my appointment with Jane. Roxie had some free time so I decided to get my hair done.”
Jane, her psychologist, had won my respect even though I’d never believed in that shit before. Harlow had come to life again after starting to see her nearly two months ago. “You had a good appointment with Jane?” I took a swig of my beer while waiting to hear about her appointment. Something in her day today had gone well and I wanted to know what it was.
She lifted her head to look at me. Even the change in her eyes was clear to see. Most days it felt like she looked straight through me, but tonight she was soaking me in. Today I didn’t need her words to know I was the man she loved; today her eyes told me everything I needed to know.
Happiness blazed from her. “I had the best appointment with Jane today, but I couldn’t even tell you why. It was as if something one of us said just triggered a change in me. You know how sometimes someone can say or do something and it makes you see things differently…well, that’s what happened.”
“What did she say?”
“She brought up coping mechanisms with me again and you know, I don’t think I was really listening all the other times she talked about them. Today it seemed to click into place and I feel like I can do this.” The way she gushed her words gave me hope this really might be a turning point. I hadn’t heard Harlow talk like this for a long time.
“Do you mean the things like doing yoga, and eating well, and writing shit down?”
Her eyebrows shot up. “Have you been researching it?”
I placed my beer on the ground and ran my hand up her leg and over her ass where I let it rest. “I read all the sheets of paper you bring home from her, sweetheart.” Hell, I devoured those sheets looking for an answer.
She held my gaze for a few moments before saying anything, and then pressed a kiss to my lips. Just a quick one, but I could feel the love it held. “Thank you,” she whispered as if she was thanking me for the world.
I frowned. “For reading that stuff?”
Shaking her head, she corrected me. “No, for loving me enough to get me help, and for coming to the appointments I needed you at, and for reading all those sheets of paper…for giving me the time and space to work myself out. People might think you’re a hard ass, but they don’t know the real you.” She paused and curled her hand around my neck before adding, “I’m the luckiest woman in the world to know the real you.” Her lips came to mine again and her kiss was long and deep.
I groaned and gripped her ass while she kissed me. When she finally let my lips go, I said, “Harlow, any man would have done that for you. Any man would want you to be happy again. I’m just doing what they would do.”
“No, they wouldn’t have. You know about the assholes I’ve dated before – not one of them would have stood next to me like you did.”
Just the thought of those men caused my chest to tighten. “You’re right,” I said. “Every man but those assholes would have done what I did.”
She smiled and then her smile morphed into seriousness as she cocked her head to the side. “So are you going to tell me about your day?”
I drew a long breath and then slowly let it out. “We lost some men today. They didn’t agree with a club decision and I gave them the option to leave the club, which they chose to do. And on top of that we’ve got a new drug dealer in town causing trouble so I’ve gotta deal with him.”
“How many members left?”
“Seven.”
Her eyes widened. “Goodness - ” she started, but I cut her off.
“I don’t want you to worry about this. Griff and I have it covered. I just want you to focus on doing the stuff Jane tells you to do so you can get better.”
Annoyance flared in her eyes. “Don’t do that.”
“Do what?” I stared at her waiting for her answer, not sure where she was coming from.
“That thing men sometimes do where they think they’re helping their woman by telling her not to worry about what they are going through. Of course I’m going to worry about you and the club so there’s no point telling me not to worry. The thing that will make me worry less is if you keep me up-to-date with where you’re at with it.” She moved off my lap and stared down at me. Usually I’d allow my gaze to travel the length of her body, but the passion she spoke with kept my attention firmly on her face. “I’m going to keep focusing on doing the things Jane spoke to me about, but at the same time I’m going to be thinking about you, so you may as well keep me updated. Otherwise, my imagination will take over and I’ll probably picture the worst.” Her eyes flashed with passion and her tone was forceful.
I raked my fingers through my hair as I watched her go, and wondered, not for the first time, when I’d have all the pieces of her back – the pieces that had shattered when she’d lost our baby. The pieces she hadn’t been able to find to put back together yet.
I miss those pieces.
As I followed in the direction she’d gone, I vowed yet again to help her find those fucking pieces.
Five hours later, I was sitting outside on the verandah with a beer contemplating club business when Harlow came up behind me, wrapped her arms around me and whispered against my ear, “You wore me out.” I’d had her in the shower and then again in our bed, and fuck, I’d worn myself out, too. She’d fallen asleep for a little while, but I’d been unable to switch my brain off.
She came and curled up in my lap. I put one arm around her and rested my hand holding my beer on her bare leg. She wore only a t-shirt of mine and I fought the urge to rip it off her. First we needed to talk. As she rested her head on my shoulder, I asked, “Did you spend time with the girls today?”
I could hear the smile in her voice when she replied. “Yeah, it was quiet at the café and Mum suggested I take some time off after my appointment with Jane. Roxie had some free time so I decided to get my hair done.”
Jane, her psychologist, had won my respect even though I’d never believed in that shit before. Harlow had come to life again after starting to see her nearly two months ago. “You had a good appointment with Jane?” I took a swig of my beer while waiting to hear about her appointment. Something in her day today had gone well and I wanted to know what it was.
She lifted her head to look at me. Even the change in her eyes was clear to see. Most days it felt like she looked straight through me, but tonight she was soaking me in. Today I didn’t need her words to know I was the man she loved; today her eyes told me everything I needed to know.
Happiness blazed from her. “I had the best appointment with Jane today, but I couldn’t even tell you why. It was as if something one of us said just triggered a change in me. You know how sometimes someone can say or do something and it makes you see things differently…well, that’s what happened.”
“What did she say?”
“She brought up coping mechanisms with me again and you know, I don’t think I was really listening all the other times she talked about them. Today it seemed to click into place and I feel like I can do this.” The way she gushed her words gave me hope this really might be a turning point. I hadn’t heard Harlow talk like this for a long time.
“Do you mean the things like doing yoga, and eating well, and writing shit down?”
Her eyebrows shot up. “Have you been researching it?”
I placed my beer on the ground and ran my hand up her leg and over her ass where I let it rest. “I read all the sheets of paper you bring home from her, sweetheart.” Hell, I devoured those sheets looking for an answer.
She held my gaze for a few moments before saying anything, and then pressed a kiss to my lips. Just a quick one, but I could feel the love it held. “Thank you,” she whispered as if she was thanking me for the world.
I frowned. “For reading that stuff?”
Shaking her head, she corrected me. “No, for loving me enough to get me help, and for coming to the appointments I needed you at, and for reading all those sheets of paper…for giving me the time and space to work myself out. People might think you’re a hard ass, but they don’t know the real you.” She paused and curled her hand around my neck before adding, “I’m the luckiest woman in the world to know the real you.” Her lips came to mine again and her kiss was long and deep.
I groaned and gripped her ass while she kissed me. When she finally let my lips go, I said, “Harlow, any man would have done that for you. Any man would want you to be happy again. I’m just doing what they would do.”
“No, they wouldn’t have. You know about the assholes I’ve dated before – not one of them would have stood next to me like you did.”
Just the thought of those men caused my chest to tighten. “You’re right,” I said. “Every man but those assholes would have done what I did.”
She smiled and then her smile morphed into seriousness as she cocked her head to the side. “So are you going to tell me about your day?”
I drew a long breath and then slowly let it out. “We lost some men today. They didn’t agree with a club decision and I gave them the option to leave the club, which they chose to do. And on top of that we’ve got a new drug dealer in town causing trouble so I’ve gotta deal with him.”
“How many members left?”
“Seven.”
Her eyes widened. “Goodness - ” she started, but I cut her off.
“I don’t want you to worry about this. Griff and I have it covered. I just want you to focus on doing the stuff Jane tells you to do so you can get better.”
Annoyance flared in her eyes. “Don’t do that.”
“Do what?” I stared at her waiting for her answer, not sure where she was coming from.
“That thing men sometimes do where they think they’re helping their woman by telling her not to worry about what they are going through. Of course I’m going to worry about you and the club so there’s no point telling me not to worry. The thing that will make me worry less is if you keep me up-to-date with where you’re at with it.” She moved off my lap and stared down at me. Usually I’d allow my gaze to travel the length of her body, but the passion she spoke with kept my attention firmly on her face. “I’m going to keep focusing on doing the things Jane spoke to me about, but at the same time I’m going to be thinking about you, so you may as well keep me updated. Otherwise, my imagination will take over and I’ll probably picture the worst.” Her eyes flashed with passion and her tone was forceful.
