Convicted
Page 36
Placing her hand again on Phil’s arm, she replied, “I don’t intend to have that, or any other discussion with you in private. Please leave.”
“You’re in danger. You know that. The FBI wants to help you. Don’t be stupid and trust the wrong people.”
Claire stood. “Hmm”—straightening her shoulders and feeling the fire flash in her eyes, she replied—“Yes, I’ve definitely been stupid”—emphasizing his word—“in the past. I believe I’m finally learning from my mistakes. Goodbye, Agent Baldwin.”
Harry took a step toward her. “Claire.”
Phil quickly moved between them.
Harry continued speaking, “Listen to me—I didn’t call you stupid. It’s just that you have a blind spot when it comes to Rawlings. Even after everything he’s done.” Harry spoke quickly, “What I mean is that you never would have left, like you did, if there wasn’t some part of you who still feared him.” When Claire started to turn away, Harry reached for her hand. “Just give it some thought. Seriously, I don’t blame you for being upset with me, but I never kidnapped you, raped you, hurt—”
Claire interrupted and pulled her hand free, “No, you didn’t, but you weren’t honest with me either! You misled me into believing you were someone you’re not. At least Tony was honest with who he was.”
“Really? Was he honest when he said his name was Anthony Rawlings or Anton Rawls?”
The intensity of Claire’s eyes grew with each word. “Anthony Rawlings is his legal name. That isn’t, nor was it, a lie; however, I have yet to be assured of your legal name.” When Agent Baldwin failed to respond, Claire continued, “I will repeat—Tony has changed, and he isn’t the person who I’m running from.”
“Then tell me, who are you running from? Who scared you enough to leave him, let your family and friends think you’re possibly dead, and hide out in another country?”
“You’re the FBI—figure it out.”
Phil’s deep voice entered the conversation. His steadfast tone didn’t invite debate. “I believe Claire asked you to leave.”
Once again, disregarding Phil, Harry continued, “Claire, how about if you don’t leave?” His tone mellowed. “Stay here a day or two longer and think about what I said. Tell me who you’re running from. Let me tell you what we know about Rawlings and his connections to other open cases.”
Claire stepped past Phil and walked toward the door to the bedroom. “Phil, please show Agent Baldwin out.” With that, she disappeared through the threshold, shut the door, and left the two men alone. If she tried, she could hear their words, but Claire didn’t want to try. She didn’t want to think about how yet another person, someone she’d trusted, had lied to her. Tears formed as she remembered late nights with Harry, sitting with him on the sofa of Amber’s condominium and recanting details of her private life. During those times, she’d felt safe and supported as she recounted things she never thought she could share with another man. Today, she felt used.
Harry’s words from only a few minutes earlier came back to her: I never kidnapped you, raped you, hurt...Before she walked into the bathroom to get ready for bed, Claire whispered, speaking aloud, yet not for anyone to hear—more as a validation to herself, “You’re wrong, Harry. Now you’ve hurt me.”
When she returned to her room, Phil was standing in the open doorway. His presence surprised her. He usually knocked before he entered her room. “What are you..?”
“Are you all right?”
The concern in his voice wouldn’t allow Claire to be upset by his invasion of her private space. She swallowed and nodded.
Phil grinned. “You see, your instincts were right.”
A renegade tear slid down Claire’s freshly washed cheek. She didn’t want to be sad. After all, she’d left Harry for Tony. She wanted to compartmentalize Harry away; however, from the moment she watched Harry walk out of that hospital room, she’d thought she was the monster, the one who took advantage of his feelings and crushed them. During those months in Palo Alto, she considered Amber and Harry her reinforcements, her chess pieces fortifying her with the strength to face Tony. She wondered, was she just a pawn in a much bigger game? Was anything real?
With a lump in her throat, Claire answered, “Why doesn’t that make me feel better?”
“It will, one day. Just keep listening to them. What are they saying right now?”
“You’re in danger. You know that. The FBI wants to help you. Don’t be stupid and trust the wrong people.”
Claire stood. “Hmm”—straightening her shoulders and feeling the fire flash in her eyes, she replied—“Yes, I’ve definitely been stupid”—emphasizing his word—“in the past. I believe I’m finally learning from my mistakes. Goodbye, Agent Baldwin.”
Harry took a step toward her. “Claire.”
Phil quickly moved between them.
Harry continued speaking, “Listen to me—I didn’t call you stupid. It’s just that you have a blind spot when it comes to Rawlings. Even after everything he’s done.” Harry spoke quickly, “What I mean is that you never would have left, like you did, if there wasn’t some part of you who still feared him.” When Claire started to turn away, Harry reached for her hand. “Just give it some thought. Seriously, I don’t blame you for being upset with me, but I never kidnapped you, raped you, hurt—”
Claire interrupted and pulled her hand free, “No, you didn’t, but you weren’t honest with me either! You misled me into believing you were someone you’re not. At least Tony was honest with who he was.”
“Really? Was he honest when he said his name was Anthony Rawlings or Anton Rawls?”
The intensity of Claire’s eyes grew with each word. “Anthony Rawlings is his legal name. That isn’t, nor was it, a lie; however, I have yet to be assured of your legal name.” When Agent Baldwin failed to respond, Claire continued, “I will repeat—Tony has changed, and he isn’t the person who I’m running from.”
“Then tell me, who are you running from? Who scared you enough to leave him, let your family and friends think you’re possibly dead, and hide out in another country?”
“You’re the FBI—figure it out.”
Phil’s deep voice entered the conversation. His steadfast tone didn’t invite debate. “I believe Claire asked you to leave.”
Once again, disregarding Phil, Harry continued, “Claire, how about if you don’t leave?” His tone mellowed. “Stay here a day or two longer and think about what I said. Tell me who you’re running from. Let me tell you what we know about Rawlings and his connections to other open cases.”
Claire stepped past Phil and walked toward the door to the bedroom. “Phil, please show Agent Baldwin out.” With that, she disappeared through the threshold, shut the door, and left the two men alone. If she tried, she could hear their words, but Claire didn’t want to try. She didn’t want to think about how yet another person, someone she’d trusted, had lied to her. Tears formed as she remembered late nights with Harry, sitting with him on the sofa of Amber’s condominium and recanting details of her private life. During those times, she’d felt safe and supported as she recounted things she never thought she could share with another man. Today, she felt used.
Harry’s words from only a few minutes earlier came back to her: I never kidnapped you, raped you, hurt...Before she walked into the bathroom to get ready for bed, Claire whispered, speaking aloud, yet not for anyone to hear—more as a validation to herself, “You’re wrong, Harry. Now you’ve hurt me.”
When she returned to her room, Phil was standing in the open doorway. His presence surprised her. He usually knocked before he entered her room. “What are you..?”
“Are you all right?”
The concern in his voice wouldn’t allow Claire to be upset by his invasion of her private space. She swallowed and nodded.
Phil grinned. “You see, your instincts were right.”
A renegade tear slid down Claire’s freshly washed cheek. She didn’t want to be sad. After all, she’d left Harry for Tony. She wanted to compartmentalize Harry away; however, from the moment she watched Harry walk out of that hospital room, she’d thought she was the monster, the one who took advantage of his feelings and crushed them. During those months in Palo Alto, she considered Amber and Harry her reinforcements, her chess pieces fortifying her with the strength to face Tony. She wondered, was she just a pawn in a much bigger game? Was anything real?
With a lump in her throat, Claire answered, “Why doesn’t that make me feel better?”
“It will, one day. Just keep listening to them. What are they saying right now?”
