Convicted
Page 72
Claire jumped. “Oh! You scared me. I thought you were gone.”
“We were, but I came to check on you. Is it your head again? Does it bother you?”
Claire reached out and touched Madeline’s hand. “Please don’t mention my headaches around Mr. Rawlings.”
“I’m sure he knows. He looks at you with so much adoration, like he knows your thoughts. I knew right away that he was who you’ve been waiting for.”
Claire grinned. “I never said I was waiting for anyone.”
“No, Madame el, you didn’t.” Madeline noticed the diamond on Claire’s hand. “Are you to be wed?”
Twisting the diamond, Claire sighed. Her smile tried to disguise the sadness in her eyes. “Oh, it’s a very long story.”
“You are too young to have a long story.”
“You’re right, I am—but I do. In a nutshell, Mr. Rawlings and I were married, we divorced, and he asked me to marry him again, and I said yes. Madeline, I’ve made a lot of mistakes—especially in the last few years. I don’t want to make another one.”
The whites of Madeline’s eyes shone like beacons in the darkness. “Madame el, I don’t know your long story. I can see you are blessed with people who love you, and in the short time I’ve known you, I understand why. When Monsieur Rawlings arrived, I saw the love and joy in your eyes. Why are you now reconsidering?”
“Oh, I’m not—I love him—I do.” Claire hoped Madeline wouldn’t notice the tears quietly descending her cheeks. She worked to keep her voice steady. “Before we marry—again—I need to know some things. I need some answers.”
“It isn’t my place, so if you don’t want my advice, I will leave.”
Claire shook her head. “I didn’t grow up with places. This way of living is part of my long story. So, Madeline, I’d be honored to hear your advice.”
“Madame el, things happen for a reason. If your long story is all happy, that’s wonderful; however, I believe there’s more to it. Some of the answers you seek—you are afraid of what you may learn, oui?”
Claire nodded.
“You love him, despite that long story, oui?”
Claire nodded again. “I do.”
“And, Madame el, he loves you. Does he know your story?”
“Yes—he knows my story.”
“What we fear is what we do not know. When something is cloaked by the darkness of uncertainty, it’s a mystery. Allowing light to penetrate that darkness makes everything clear”—she pointed out to the dark sea—“Look at the ocean. In the darkness, all you can do is listen to the wind and the waves. You ask yourself, are there creatures, boats, or untold dangers lurking? We don’t know, and then, in our minds we create perils that do not truly exist. In the morning when the sun shines and you see into the depths of the crystal blue water, or all the way out to the horizon, you know you are safe”—Squeezing Claire’s hand, she added—“In the light of day, I see your love. Please don’t allow the dark of night to hide what is right in front of you. Even if those answers are not what you want to hear, do you think they can be as bad as you imagine?”
Claire shrugged. “I really don’t know. I know I want to not think about them right now and worry about them later.”
Madeline’s voice slowed. “If that will make you feel best; however, I’ve found that the longer I put off turning on the light, the bigger the monster under my bed becomes.” Once again, she squeezed Claire’s hand and then reached into her pocket and handed Claire a tissue. “May I get you anything else?”
Claire wiped her eyes and cheeks. Miraculously, the tears served as a vent, releasing some of the pressure from her temples. Her headache wasn’t as intense. With a sad smile, she replied, “You’ve given me a lot, thank you. Have a good night.”
“Good night, Madame el.”
Enjoying the calm of the darkness, Claire reflected on Madeline’s words. If only Madeline knew the truth—at one time—that monster in the dark was actually the man in the other room. Now the monster was a woman Claire trusted. Could she ever trust her own instincts? A faint smile came to her lips as she remembered Phil’s words. He told her to do just that—listen and trust her instincts.
When Claire stood to move to their room, she saw the shadow near the end of the lanai move; instead of going through the house, Claire followed her intuition and walked toward the darkness. Just outside of their suite, Tony stepped from the shadow and gently took Claire into his arms.
“We were, but I came to check on you. Is it your head again? Does it bother you?”
Claire reached out and touched Madeline’s hand. “Please don’t mention my headaches around Mr. Rawlings.”
“I’m sure he knows. He looks at you with so much adoration, like he knows your thoughts. I knew right away that he was who you’ve been waiting for.”
Claire grinned. “I never said I was waiting for anyone.”
“No, Madame el, you didn’t.” Madeline noticed the diamond on Claire’s hand. “Are you to be wed?”
Twisting the diamond, Claire sighed. Her smile tried to disguise the sadness in her eyes. “Oh, it’s a very long story.”
“You are too young to have a long story.”
“You’re right, I am—but I do. In a nutshell, Mr. Rawlings and I were married, we divorced, and he asked me to marry him again, and I said yes. Madeline, I’ve made a lot of mistakes—especially in the last few years. I don’t want to make another one.”
The whites of Madeline’s eyes shone like beacons in the darkness. “Madame el, I don’t know your long story. I can see you are blessed with people who love you, and in the short time I’ve known you, I understand why. When Monsieur Rawlings arrived, I saw the love and joy in your eyes. Why are you now reconsidering?”
“Oh, I’m not—I love him—I do.” Claire hoped Madeline wouldn’t notice the tears quietly descending her cheeks. She worked to keep her voice steady. “Before we marry—again—I need to know some things. I need some answers.”
“It isn’t my place, so if you don’t want my advice, I will leave.”
Claire shook her head. “I didn’t grow up with places. This way of living is part of my long story. So, Madeline, I’d be honored to hear your advice.”
“Madame el, things happen for a reason. If your long story is all happy, that’s wonderful; however, I believe there’s more to it. Some of the answers you seek—you are afraid of what you may learn, oui?”
Claire nodded.
“You love him, despite that long story, oui?”
Claire nodded again. “I do.”
“And, Madame el, he loves you. Does he know your story?”
“Yes—he knows my story.”
“What we fear is what we do not know. When something is cloaked by the darkness of uncertainty, it’s a mystery. Allowing light to penetrate that darkness makes everything clear”—she pointed out to the dark sea—“Look at the ocean. In the darkness, all you can do is listen to the wind and the waves. You ask yourself, are there creatures, boats, or untold dangers lurking? We don’t know, and then, in our minds we create perils that do not truly exist. In the morning when the sun shines and you see into the depths of the crystal blue water, or all the way out to the horizon, you know you are safe”—Squeezing Claire’s hand, she added—“In the light of day, I see your love. Please don’t allow the dark of night to hide what is right in front of you. Even if those answers are not what you want to hear, do you think they can be as bad as you imagine?”
Claire shrugged. “I really don’t know. I know I want to not think about them right now and worry about them later.”
Madeline’s voice slowed. “If that will make you feel best; however, I’ve found that the longer I put off turning on the light, the bigger the monster under my bed becomes.” Once again, she squeezed Claire’s hand and then reached into her pocket and handed Claire a tissue. “May I get you anything else?”
Claire wiped her eyes and cheeks. Miraculously, the tears served as a vent, releasing some of the pressure from her temples. Her headache wasn’t as intense. With a sad smile, she replied, “You’ve given me a lot, thank you. Have a good night.”
“Good night, Madame el.”
Enjoying the calm of the darkness, Claire reflected on Madeline’s words. If only Madeline knew the truth—at one time—that monster in the dark was actually the man in the other room. Now the monster was a woman Claire trusted. Could she ever trust her own instincts? A faint smile came to her lips as she remembered Phil’s words. He told her to do just that—listen and trust her instincts.
When Claire stood to move to their room, she saw the shadow near the end of the lanai move; instead of going through the house, Claire followed her intuition and walked toward the darkness. Just outside of their suite, Tony stepped from the shadow and gently took Claire into his arms.