Convincing Alex
Page 36
"Okay." She was all but bursting to tell, in any case. "I was with Alexi."
"I thought that was yesterday."
"It was." Bess's smile spread. "And last night. And this morning. Oh, Lori, it's incredible. I've never felt this way about anyone."
"Right." She started to pick up her reading glasses, then looked up again. For a moment, she did nothing but study Bess's face. "Say that again."
"I've never felt this way about anyone."
"Good grief." On a quick huff of breath, Lori sat back. "I think you mean it."
"It's different." With a half laugh, Bess pressed a hand to her cheek. "It's scary, and it hurts, and sometimes I look at him and I can't even breathe. I'm so afraid he might take a good look at me and realize his mistake." She let her hand drop away. "It's supposed to be easy."
"No." Slowly Lori shook her head. "That was always your mistake. It's supposed to be hard, and scary and real."
"There's this clutching around my heart."
"Yeah."
"And… and…" Frustrated, Bess turned, scooting around a chair so that she could pace the length of the table. "And my stomach's all tied up in knots one minute. The next I feel so happy I can hardly bear it. When we were together last night…" No way to describe it, she thought. No possible way. "Lori, I swear, no one's ever made me feel like that. And this morning, when I woke up beside him, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry."
Lori rose, held out a hand. "Congratulations, McNee. You've finally made it."
"Looks that way." With a laugh, she threw her arms around Lori and squeezed. "Why didn't you ever tell me how it feels?"
"It's something you have to experience firsthand. How about him?"
"He loves me." She felt foolish and weepy. Digging through her bag she found a tattered tissue. "He told me. He looked at me, and he told me. But—"
"Oh-oh."
"He doesn't want me to tell him how I feel." Hissing a breath through her teeth, she pressed a hand to her stomach. "Oh, God, it hurts. It hurts everywhere when I realize he doesn't trust me enough. He thinks it's like all the other times. Why shouldn't he? But I want him to know it's not—and I don't know how.''
"He only has to look at you."
"It's not enough." Calmer now, Bess blew her nose. "Everything's different this time. I guess I have to prove myself. I do love him, Lori."
"I can see that. I wasn't sure I ever would." Touched, she lifted a hand to Bess's hair. "You could take your own advice, and talk to him.''
"We have talked. But he doesn't want to hear this, at least not yet. He wants things to stay as they are."
Lori lifted her brows. "What do you want?"
"For him to be happy." She chuckled and stuffed the mangled tissue back in her purse. "That makes me sound like a wimp. You know I'm not."
"Who knows you better? It only makes you sound like a woman in the first dizzy stages of love."
Bess gave her a watery smile. "Does it get worse or better?"
"Both."
"That's good news. Well, while it's getting worse and better, I'll have time to show him how I feel." She picked up her coffee, then set it aside again. "Lori, there's one more thing."
"What could be bigger?" Lori demanded.
"Alexi wants me to have dinner with his family on Sunday."
After a quick gurgle of laughter, Lori's eyes widened. "He's taking you home to Mother?"
"And Father," Bess put in. "And brothers and sisters and nieces and nephews. A couple times a month they have a big family dinner on Sunday."
"Obviously the man is crazy about you."
"He is. I know he is." Then she shut her eyes and dropped into a chair. "His family is enormously important to him. You can hear it every time he mentions one of them." She grabbed another tissue and began to tear it to shreds. "I want to meet them. Really. But what if they don't like me?"
"You have got it bad. Take it from me, you just be the Bess McNee we all know and love, and they'll be crazy about you, too."
"But what if—"
"What if you pull yourself together?" This time Lori picked up her glasses, perched them on her nose. "Put some of this angst into Storm and Jade's heartbreak. Millions of viewers will thank you."
After a deep breath, Bess nodded. "Okay, okay. That might work. And if we don't get the morning session out of the way, we won't be ready when Rosalie comes in at noon for a consulting session."
"Your deal, sister." Frowning, Lori gestured with a pencil. "That particular lady makes me nervous."
"Don't worry about Rosalie. I know what I'm doing."
"How many times have I heard that?"
But Bess only smiled and let her mind drift. "Okay. Storm and Jade." She closed her eyes, envisioned the scene. "So, they run into each other at the station…"
Chapter 9
And then," Bess continued as she zipped through traffic, "Jade turns back, devastated, and says, 'But what you want isn't always what you need.' Music swells, fade out."
"It's not that I'm not fascinated by the twists and turns of those people in Holbrook…"
"Millbrook."
"Right." Alex winced as she cut off a sedan. "I just wish you'd watch the road. It would be really embarrassing if you got a ticket while I was in the car with you."
"I'm not speeding." Frowning, she glanced down at her speedometer. "Hardly."
She handled the five speed like a seasoned veteran of the Indianapolis 500, Alex thought. And at the moment she was treating the other, innocent drivers on the road like competitors. "Maybe you could find a home in one lane and stay there."
"Killjoy." But she did as he asked. "I hardly ever get to drive. I love it."
He had to smile. The wind whipping in through the open sunroof was blowing her hair everywhere. "I'd never have guessed."
"The last time I had a chance was when L.D. and I went to some fancy do on Long Island." She checked her mirror and, unable to resist, shot into the next lane. "One trip with me and he insisted on taking his car and driver every damn place." She sent Alex a smile, then sobered instantly when she saw his expression. "I'm sorry."
"I thought that was yesterday."
"It was." Bess's smile spread. "And last night. And this morning. Oh, Lori, it's incredible. I've never felt this way about anyone."
"Right." She started to pick up her reading glasses, then looked up again. For a moment, she did nothing but study Bess's face. "Say that again."
"I've never felt this way about anyone."
"Good grief." On a quick huff of breath, Lori sat back. "I think you mean it."
"It's different." With a half laugh, Bess pressed a hand to her cheek. "It's scary, and it hurts, and sometimes I look at him and I can't even breathe. I'm so afraid he might take a good look at me and realize his mistake." She let her hand drop away. "It's supposed to be easy."
"No." Slowly Lori shook her head. "That was always your mistake. It's supposed to be hard, and scary and real."
"There's this clutching around my heart."
"Yeah."
"And… and…" Frustrated, Bess turned, scooting around a chair so that she could pace the length of the table. "And my stomach's all tied up in knots one minute. The next I feel so happy I can hardly bear it. When we were together last night…" No way to describe it, she thought. No possible way. "Lori, I swear, no one's ever made me feel like that. And this morning, when I woke up beside him, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry."
Lori rose, held out a hand. "Congratulations, McNee. You've finally made it."
"Looks that way." With a laugh, she threw her arms around Lori and squeezed. "Why didn't you ever tell me how it feels?"
"It's something you have to experience firsthand. How about him?"
"He loves me." She felt foolish and weepy. Digging through her bag she found a tattered tissue. "He told me. He looked at me, and he told me. But—"
"Oh-oh."
"He doesn't want me to tell him how I feel." Hissing a breath through her teeth, she pressed a hand to her stomach. "Oh, God, it hurts. It hurts everywhere when I realize he doesn't trust me enough. He thinks it's like all the other times. Why shouldn't he? But I want him to know it's not—and I don't know how.''
"He only has to look at you."
"It's not enough." Calmer now, Bess blew her nose. "Everything's different this time. I guess I have to prove myself. I do love him, Lori."
"I can see that. I wasn't sure I ever would." Touched, she lifted a hand to Bess's hair. "You could take your own advice, and talk to him.''
"We have talked. But he doesn't want to hear this, at least not yet. He wants things to stay as they are."
Lori lifted her brows. "What do you want?"
"For him to be happy." She chuckled and stuffed the mangled tissue back in her purse. "That makes me sound like a wimp. You know I'm not."
"Who knows you better? It only makes you sound like a woman in the first dizzy stages of love."
Bess gave her a watery smile. "Does it get worse or better?"
"Both."
"That's good news. Well, while it's getting worse and better, I'll have time to show him how I feel." She picked up her coffee, then set it aside again. "Lori, there's one more thing."
"What could be bigger?" Lori demanded.
"Alexi wants me to have dinner with his family on Sunday."
After a quick gurgle of laughter, Lori's eyes widened. "He's taking you home to Mother?"
"And Father," Bess put in. "And brothers and sisters and nieces and nephews. A couple times a month they have a big family dinner on Sunday."
"Obviously the man is crazy about you."
"He is. I know he is." Then she shut her eyes and dropped into a chair. "His family is enormously important to him. You can hear it every time he mentions one of them." She grabbed another tissue and began to tear it to shreds. "I want to meet them. Really. But what if they don't like me?"
"You have got it bad. Take it from me, you just be the Bess McNee we all know and love, and they'll be crazy about you, too."
"But what if—"
"What if you pull yourself together?" This time Lori picked up her glasses, perched them on her nose. "Put some of this angst into Storm and Jade's heartbreak. Millions of viewers will thank you."
After a deep breath, Bess nodded. "Okay, okay. That might work. And if we don't get the morning session out of the way, we won't be ready when Rosalie comes in at noon for a consulting session."
"Your deal, sister." Frowning, Lori gestured with a pencil. "That particular lady makes me nervous."
"Don't worry about Rosalie. I know what I'm doing."
"How many times have I heard that?"
But Bess only smiled and let her mind drift. "Okay. Storm and Jade." She closed her eyes, envisioned the scene. "So, they run into each other at the station…"
Chapter 9
And then," Bess continued as she zipped through traffic, "Jade turns back, devastated, and says, 'But what you want isn't always what you need.' Music swells, fade out."
"It's not that I'm not fascinated by the twists and turns of those people in Holbrook…"
"Millbrook."
"Right." Alex winced as she cut off a sedan. "I just wish you'd watch the road. It would be really embarrassing if you got a ticket while I was in the car with you."
"I'm not speeding." Frowning, she glanced down at her speedometer. "Hardly."
She handled the five speed like a seasoned veteran of the Indianapolis 500, Alex thought. And at the moment she was treating the other, innocent drivers on the road like competitors. "Maybe you could find a home in one lane and stay there."
"Killjoy." But she did as he asked. "I hardly ever get to drive. I love it."
He had to smile. The wind whipping in through the open sunroof was blowing her hair everywhere. "I'd never have guessed."
"The last time I had a chance was when L.D. and I went to some fancy do on Long Island." She checked her mirror and, unable to resist, shot into the next lane. "One trip with me and he insisted on taking his car and driver every damn place." She sent Alex a smile, then sobered instantly when she saw his expression. "I'm sorry."
