Craving Absolution
Page 58
The hole I’d put there.
“Shit!” Dragon hissed, unbuckling his belt as he dropped down next to Slider.
I was frozen, staring at the woman as she dropped to her knees.
“Carmella?” Samson asked, his face drawn in confusion.
“Oh, fuck no.” Slider groaned from the floor beside me. “What the fuck were you thinking, sweetheart?”
My mind raced with questions, but I couldn’t make a sound as I watched her slump against the wall. What the hell had just happened? Who was she? Shit! Who the fuck had I just shot?
The rest of the men poured into the doorway, their relief palpable until they took in Slider and the woman on the floor. I stumbled to the side and braced my forearm against the wall, as looks of confusion and horror crossed the normally emotionless men’s faces.
What the hell had I done?
Chapter 31
Farrah
I got to my feet shakily, keeping the quilt wrapped firmly around me as I faced the corner of the house. I couldn’t see anything at first, but within seconds a familiar shape stepped into the light and I felt my shoulders slump. Cody, thank God.
“Hey, Ladybug,” he called out. He looked exhausted as he walked toward me. “Time to go home.”
My feet flew across the scarred wooden porch as his steps sped up, and within seconds his arms were tight around me, his face in my neck.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” I whispered, wrapping my arms around his head, holding him against me, and he shuddered.
“What’s wrong, handsome?” I asked.
“Need to get you home, baby,” he answered gently, rearing back against my arms so he could look me in the eye. He let go of my waist before I was ready, and his entire body was jittery as he ran his hands over his head.
I stumbled as he suddenly grabbed my hand and started towing me toward the back door, grabbing the quilt as we passed it. “What’s going on? What’s the hurry?”
“Slider’s asking for you.”
I dug my heels into the worn linoleum as we reached the kitchen, jerking my hand out of his.
“And?” I asked, crossing my arms as he turned to face me.
Gram and Lily stood from the table as we reached it, their eyes filled with a mixture of relief and concern as Cody and I stared at each other.
“Farrah.” He paused, a large sigh lifting his chest. “Got shit taken care of, but we had some problems.”
My heart started racing, but I tried to keep any trace of concern from my face. I didn’t care what happened to Slider. I hated him—no, that wasn’t right—I was indifferent. Yeah, that was better. He didn’t matter to me at all. He was a sperm donor.
I couldn’t help swallowing hard as they watched me.
“You’re okay? Grease is okay?” I asked, lifting my chin.
“Yeah, Ladybug. We’re good.”
“Then I’ve got no reason to leave. I need to pack and spend some time with Lily before I can go anywhere.”
Cody made a frustrated sound in his throat, almost a growl, and my chin lifted even further.
“I can get your things, Farrah,” Gram said.
“I’ll be up next week and we can have a nice visit,” Lily said at the same time.
My head jerked toward them, betrayal washing through me. They might as well have just kicked me out, but both of their faces were wreathed in concern as they looked between Cody and me. Gram’s hand had lifted to her mouth, rubbing at her bottom lip in a nervous gesture I was familiar with, and my stomach sank.
“What? Is Slider dying or something?” I asked flatly.
My words must have hit some trigger that I hadn’t known existed, because Cody snapped.
“Get the fuck upstairs and get dressed!” he shouted, making me flinch as he leaned into my face. “You’ve got fifteen minutes, Farrah. Fifteen fucking minutes or I’m coming up there to get you.”
I whimpered, my eyes wide as I took in his flexing muscles and red face. What had I done? I didn’t understand what was happening. When his arm raised to the back of his neck, I flinched again and then turned and ran, silent sobs shaking my body with each step I took away from him. He was scary. For the first time since I’d met him, Cody had actually scared me.
I didn’t know how to process it, and so, with my quilt downstairs in Cody’s hand, my body did the processing for me. The panic attack hit me hard. I stumbled into the wall outside my room, falling to my hands and knees on the hardwood floor with a loud thud.
“Cody!” Gram called from the end of the hallway. “Get your ass over here! Son of a bitch!”
I felt her arms go around me as I struggled to breathe, completely forgetting the normal exercises I used to calm myself down. Slider was dying? I didn’t care. I didn’t. Shit, he couldn’t die. I was having a baby. God, why did it hurt so bad? He was nothing. He was nothing. And why was Cody yelling at me? What did I do?
My mind whirled in confusion, my emotions all over the place until I finally reached the point where breathing was my only concern. I felt my quilt wrap around me, and my body was lifted and carried into my room.
“Breathe, Ladybug,” Cody urged as Lily pressed a small paper sack to my face. “You’re okay, baby. You’re okay.”
Cody took over holding the bag, then the quilt was flipped over our heads, encasing us in a multicolored cocoon. The sun coming through my window streamed through the quilt, and I traced the stitching with my eyes. My entire body was stiff as I tried to ignore the way Cody was pressed up against me, holding the bag to my face.
“Shit!” Dragon hissed, unbuckling his belt as he dropped down next to Slider.
I was frozen, staring at the woman as she dropped to her knees.
“Carmella?” Samson asked, his face drawn in confusion.
“Oh, fuck no.” Slider groaned from the floor beside me. “What the fuck were you thinking, sweetheart?”
My mind raced with questions, but I couldn’t make a sound as I watched her slump against the wall. What the hell had just happened? Who was she? Shit! Who the fuck had I just shot?
The rest of the men poured into the doorway, their relief palpable until they took in Slider and the woman on the floor. I stumbled to the side and braced my forearm against the wall, as looks of confusion and horror crossed the normally emotionless men’s faces.
What the hell had I done?
Chapter 31
Farrah
I got to my feet shakily, keeping the quilt wrapped firmly around me as I faced the corner of the house. I couldn’t see anything at first, but within seconds a familiar shape stepped into the light and I felt my shoulders slump. Cody, thank God.
“Hey, Ladybug,” he called out. He looked exhausted as he walked toward me. “Time to go home.”
My feet flew across the scarred wooden porch as his steps sped up, and within seconds his arms were tight around me, his face in my neck.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” I whispered, wrapping my arms around his head, holding him against me, and he shuddered.
“What’s wrong, handsome?” I asked.
“Need to get you home, baby,” he answered gently, rearing back against my arms so he could look me in the eye. He let go of my waist before I was ready, and his entire body was jittery as he ran his hands over his head.
I stumbled as he suddenly grabbed my hand and started towing me toward the back door, grabbing the quilt as we passed it. “What’s going on? What’s the hurry?”
“Slider’s asking for you.”
I dug my heels into the worn linoleum as we reached the kitchen, jerking my hand out of his.
“And?” I asked, crossing my arms as he turned to face me.
Gram and Lily stood from the table as we reached it, their eyes filled with a mixture of relief and concern as Cody and I stared at each other.
“Farrah.” He paused, a large sigh lifting his chest. “Got shit taken care of, but we had some problems.”
My heart started racing, but I tried to keep any trace of concern from my face. I didn’t care what happened to Slider. I hated him—no, that wasn’t right—I was indifferent. Yeah, that was better. He didn’t matter to me at all. He was a sperm donor.
I couldn’t help swallowing hard as they watched me.
“You’re okay? Grease is okay?” I asked, lifting my chin.
“Yeah, Ladybug. We’re good.”
“Then I’ve got no reason to leave. I need to pack and spend some time with Lily before I can go anywhere.”
Cody made a frustrated sound in his throat, almost a growl, and my chin lifted even further.
“I can get your things, Farrah,” Gram said.
“I’ll be up next week and we can have a nice visit,” Lily said at the same time.
My head jerked toward them, betrayal washing through me. They might as well have just kicked me out, but both of their faces were wreathed in concern as they looked between Cody and me. Gram’s hand had lifted to her mouth, rubbing at her bottom lip in a nervous gesture I was familiar with, and my stomach sank.
“What? Is Slider dying or something?” I asked flatly.
My words must have hit some trigger that I hadn’t known existed, because Cody snapped.
“Get the fuck upstairs and get dressed!” he shouted, making me flinch as he leaned into my face. “You’ve got fifteen minutes, Farrah. Fifteen fucking minutes or I’m coming up there to get you.”
I whimpered, my eyes wide as I took in his flexing muscles and red face. What had I done? I didn’t understand what was happening. When his arm raised to the back of his neck, I flinched again and then turned and ran, silent sobs shaking my body with each step I took away from him. He was scary. For the first time since I’d met him, Cody had actually scared me.
I didn’t know how to process it, and so, with my quilt downstairs in Cody’s hand, my body did the processing for me. The panic attack hit me hard. I stumbled into the wall outside my room, falling to my hands and knees on the hardwood floor with a loud thud.
“Cody!” Gram called from the end of the hallway. “Get your ass over here! Son of a bitch!”
I felt her arms go around me as I struggled to breathe, completely forgetting the normal exercises I used to calm myself down. Slider was dying? I didn’t care. I didn’t. Shit, he couldn’t die. I was having a baby. God, why did it hurt so bad? He was nothing. He was nothing. And why was Cody yelling at me? What did I do?
My mind whirled in confusion, my emotions all over the place until I finally reached the point where breathing was my only concern. I felt my quilt wrap around me, and my body was lifted and carried into my room.
“Breathe, Ladybug,” Cody urged as Lily pressed a small paper sack to my face. “You’re okay, baby. You’re okay.”
Cody took over holding the bag, then the quilt was flipped over our heads, encasing us in a multicolored cocoon. The sun coming through my window streamed through the quilt, and I traced the stitching with my eyes. My entire body was stiff as I tried to ignore the way Cody was pressed up against me, holding the bag to my face.
