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Alyssa gasped, shock blanching her with a chill. “Were we . . . ?”
“Oh, yeah. The look on your face . . .” Tyler looked away. “Luc know how much you love him?”
She pressed her lips together. Damn, Tyler was perceptive. And no one had ever accused him of beating around the bush. “No. It’s that obvious?”
He scoffed in answer. “That you’re wearing your heart on your sleeve? Yes.”
Great. She sighed. “I don’t know if he feels the same.”
“I don’t know, either. He wants you. Bad.” Tyler shrugged. “I think there’s more there, but I’m not the expert on guys’ feelings.”
“Used to being the heartbreaker, not the heartbroken?”
A sheepish smile crept across his mouth. “Something like that.”
“I have a feeling that, deep down, you’re a really bad boy.”
“Knock, knock.”
Alyssa turned to the sound of the female voice coming from the doorway. Kimber. She was very nice, but Alyssa looked at the younger woman with her auburn hair pulled away from her sweet oval face in a wholesome ponytail and tensed. Luc’s former lover had a long, lean body, which showed only a hint of a baby bump so far.
Kimber was everything Luc had wanted out of life and lost to his cousin. Yeah, on their wedding night, he’d told Alyssa that he’d never felt more for any other woman. But who knew if that was really his heart talking or just his attempt to make their marriage work?
Resentment toward the other woman flared, and she swallowed to force it down.
“Come in.”
Kimber drifted in, graceful in an athletic way, as if comfortable in her skin. “My brother wanted me to check on you. You okay?”
And caring, too. She probably smiled while giving the perfect blow job, kept a gorgeous garden, had been a virgin for her husband, and was looking forward to PTA meetings.
Alyssa released a shuddering sigh. She couldn’t be unkind just because her own insecurities were eating at her. She looked deliriously happy with her husband, Deke, and never gazed at Luc like a lover. The problem, Alyssa realized, was all her.
“Fine. Thanks. How’s your brother?”
She rolled her eyes. “Macho as always. They wheeled him out of surgery to remove the bullet half an hour ago, and he’s already wanting to leave. Idiot. He’ll be fine.”
“He came in to save me when he could have left me to burn, and I’ll always be grateful.”
“Saint Hunter, huh?” Kimber shook her head. “No. If there’s an adrenaline rush, my brother will run to it. Burning building? Big fun!”
The sarcasm was thick, and made Alyssa smile. She could actually picture Hunter thinking that an inferno was better than a hip party.
“Hey, I resemble that remark!” Tyler protested.
“Yeah,” Alyssa shot back. “And we’ll have words about it later.”
His expression told her she’d be wasting her breath.
Kimber turned to Tyler. “Can you give us a minute?”
Alyssa frowned. What could the other woman possibly have to say that Tyler couldn’t hear?
Her bouncer looked between the two women, then shrugged. “Sure. I’ll see if the doc is around to examine you so we can get you out of here.”
“Thanks,” she murmured, her attention focused on Kimber.
The woman moved into the room to occupy the chair Tyler had just vacated and clenched her hands in her lap. “I know I’m not your favorite person and that it’s none of my business, but I wanted to thank you for what you’re doing for Luc.”
Alyssa hesitated, filtered through Kimber’s statement a few times, then frowned. “What am I doing? I don’t know what you mean.”
“You know . . . Marrying him and letting him play father to your baby. He was so crushed when I wasn’t pregnant a few months ago . . . when he was still with Deke and me. Luc has wanted a baby for years, and knowing he can’t father one has nearly killed him. But you giving him this opportunity—”
“What?” Luc unable to father a child? That didn’t add up. Of course he could; she was living proof. But Kimber’s expression made it clear that she absolutely believed every word coming out of her mouth. “That’s not true.”
Kimber raised her brows, then sent her a smile full of pity. “You don’t have to pretend for me. Luc has known for nearly twenty years that he can’t have children. He’s been looking for alternative methods to fatherhood for the last few. That’s why he was involved with Deke and me. He didn’t love me, you know. He just hoped the three of us . . . Well, that Deke would get me pregnant so Luc could be a daddy.”
Alyssa blinked. Blinked again. Stopped breathing. That was why he’d been involved in ménages? Luc genuinely thought he was sterile? Oh, my . . . If Kimber could be believed—and why would she lie?—that meant Luc “knew” she wasn’t pregnant by him.
Cold nausea rushed all through her, and she set a protective hand over her belly. “This baby is Luc’s. I haven’t—”
“It’s okay.” Kimber smiled. “Luc told me how grateful he is that you turned to him, instead of Tyler. I’m sure it would have been easier to marry the baby’s father, but Luc needed this so badly.”
“He told you that?” she repeated numbly. He’d told Kimber that he believed he couldn’t have children, but hadn’t told his own pregnant wife?
Pain stabbed her in the chest. Betrayal ripped across her heart. It fucking hurt. How could he deceive her like this? Keep such a monumental secret. She’d known he was withholding something since they married and, even when she’d asked, he’d refused to share. Goddamn it! How could he marry her, believing the child was another man’s, and play along so masterfully?
How could he be so wrong?
God, she was going to be sick.
Kimber nodded. “We’re so thrilled for you both. Luc seems so much happier now. I felt guilty when Deke and I paired off and decided to marry and raise our own family. Knowing that you’re giving him what he needs means everything to us. Luc is a wonderful guy and he’ll make the best father ever. I have no doubt.”
Right. Alyssa suddenly had doubts—many of them. First and foremost that he gave a shit about her. Hell, she’d bared her soul to him, told him the most painful, intimate parts of her life, given every bit of herself to him. He’d repaid her with deception.
Tears threatened, and she blinked, holding them at bay. Not until Kimber was gone. Not until she could grieve alone.
Joshua and her mom had drilled into her head that she couldn’t trust anyone, no matter how close the ties. Luc’s tenderness, hot lovemaking, jealousy, protective streak—all bullshit. All manufactured lies to keep her deluded and by his side.
Fucking bastard.
Just then, the doctor knocked, Tyler in tow.
“Oops, that’s my cue to leave.” Kimber hopped up from her chair. “Good luck. Call me if you need anything. We can swap baby stories.”
The woman left with a giggle. As if she hadn’t dropped an enormous bombshell on Alyssa that shook the foundation of her very life.
Luc had married her for this child, which she’d known. She’d had no fucking clue he genuinely thought the child was Tyler’s. Or some other man’s. His initial reaction to the news of her pregnancy now made sense.
And . . . you’re here because it’s mine?
She’d heard the doubt in his tone and misunderstood it, written it off to his belief that she was a whore who slept around. Which he still must believe.
But it hadn’t taken him too long to sing a different tune with her.
The best birthday present ever. I don’t want you to call me when the baby is born. I’d like to be involved in this child’s life. I want to be there every step of the way . . .
She snorted. It all made sense now. If he thought he couldn’t have a baby and would accept another’s as his own, then marriage, even if he had to fake feelings for his new wife, was the price of f atherhood.
A new wave of nausea hit her. From start to finish, this marriage had been about this baby and placating her so that she’d share the child with him. He’d lied to her with every whispered word, every touch. All that jealousy? Perhaps feigned to make her believe that he cared. Or maybe he hadn’t wanted anyone touching the woman he’d given his name to or endangering the child to whom he planned to devote himself.
She’d been used for a lot of things in her life, but never her womb. Somehow, this felt like the worst violation of all.
Chapter Eighteen
LUC arrived back in Lafayette as the sun set, tearing into their driveway and barely parking his SUV before abandoning it and sprinting through the door, toward the stairs. He had to see Alyssa now, know she was all right. When he’d received Kimber’s phone call, his heart had stuttered, then threatened to beat from his chest. Primpton nearly roasting her alive?
Thank God they’d finally caught the sick freak harassing her. He’d known the city councilman wasn’t dipping both oars, but would never have suspected that the divorce of one of his followers would put him over the edge and incite him to murder.
But Alyssa was safe. Luc needed to see her unharmed and in one piece. Hold her. Tell her that he loved her.
Inside the foyer, he stumbled over something unexpected and tripped, barely righting himself without falling. He looked down. His suitcases. They were packed.
Could that possibly mean what it implied?
His world tilted upside down. A chill went through him as he skirted the luggage and bounded up the stairs. “Alyssa?”
No answer.
Jogging down the shadowed hall, he stopped in the doorway of the master bedroom. There she sat in bed, hair loose and long. Her wedding ring wasn’t on her finger. She wore a big gray T-shirt and stared out the window to her right. She looked a million miles away. No, she looked defeated.
Alarm prickled along his skin. Alyssa was a fighter. She’d survived trauma that would have crushed most—and she’d come out stronger. The woman mentally escaping out the window . . . That wasn’t her.
“Sugar?”
“You’re a smart man, Luc,” she said, without looking his way. “I don’t want a confrontation. Just take your things and go.”
His guts seized up into a ball. His breath stopped. Shock enough that he’d been awakened to the news she’d been trapped in a burning building and had escaped only with Tyler’s and Hunter’s help. But now she was kicking him out? Saying they were done?
“Whatever has upset you, we can work it out, sugar. I’m sorry I wasn’t here to protect you. I came back to check on you, be with you . . . What happened that would make you pack my bags and—”
“I don’t want to argue about it.”
Luc crossed the room, approached the far side of the bed, and sat on the edge, beside her. Still she continued to look past him to the window. Frustration rose, but he pushed it down, focusing on his concern for her as he took her hand in his. It was cold.
“That makes two of us. So let’s talk instead of fight. You tell me what happened, and we’ll talk it through. If you’re angry that I wasn’t here when that bastard Primpton attacked you, believe me, no one could be more upset than me.”
She shook her head, then finally looked away from the window, down to her lap. “You had a job to do and you were doing it. We talked in advance about the fact you needed to be in Los Angeles to fulfill your contractual obligations.”
Her voice sounded dead. As the sunlight hit her cheeks, he saw the silvery marks of dried tears, and they wrenched his heart. Upon closer inspection, her red eyes and nose indicated she’d cried hard. Now she had no emotion left to give. That realization kicked him breathless.
Beating back his fear, he clutched her hand. “I’m not worried about my contractual obligations right now. I’m worried about my wife.”
Alyssa squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head, platinum hair brushing her shoulders. “You’re worried about the baby.”
“Of course.” Why would that be bad?
Finally, she looked at him. The fury and resolve he saw there stunned Luc. His heart lurched. What the hell had happened since the attack? Had Tyler talked her into leaving him somehow?
“At least you’re being honest. Finally,” she sneered.
A part of him rejoiced at her show of emotion. The other part . . . Dread injected a new trepidation into his concern. He could think of only one thing he’d been less than honest about.
Oh, God, please no.
“What do you mean?” He forced the words out, hearing his own voice shake.
“I mean, I figured you’d be concerned about the baby. I just never clued in that the concern stopped there. You’re always so tender and attentive.” She shook her head, scoffing. “I’m so damn stupid that I fell for it. I keep trusting the wrong men.”