Den of Sorrows
Page 69
“It is not your job to save every person every time,” Lucian’s voice filled her mind. He wasn’t being unkind and she knew that. He was being his usual, straight forward, un-emotional self.
“Maybe not, but it is my job to save these two. They are mine, Lucian. They have been mine since the first time Jacque smarted off to me. The only way I will let them go is if the Great Luna herself takes them from my hands. And even then I might argue.”
“Might?”
“Okay, I’d definitely argue. The point is, you should understand why I do this. You have seen all my lives, the millennia that I spent on my own. It has taken three thousand years for me to find my family, but I finally have and I’m not ready to lose any of them.”
She heard his sigh and knew that he just wanted to fix things for her. “Then don’t lose them. I will give you anything you need. But remember something, Perizada, they may be yours, but you are mine. It is my job to care for you. Please be mindful of that when you are putting yourself through hell.”
“You didn’t really think I’d make being my mate easy, did you?”
This made him laugh and she loved the sound of his laughter, it brought her hope. “I would be disappointed if you made it easy, female.”
“Good to know. Put on your big girl panties, wolf, because it’s going to get worse before it gets better.”
“The darker the night only means that the dawn will be that much more beautiful.”
“I’m ready for the dawn, dammit.”
“As am I, beloved. As am I.”
Decebel pulled Jen tighter against him and he felt her shiver. She was exhausted. He’d finally convinced her to get some sleep when she’d been holding Thia and had fallen asleep sitting up. Her heart was broken and he had no idea what to do to help her keep the pieces together until it could be mended. Jacque and Fane could not die. He wouldn’t allow it. If they died, it would destroy his mate. There would be a part of her that would forever be lost and he wouldn’t be able to fix it.
Jennifer was strong. She was a force to be reckoned with, but she was not impervious to anguish or loss. She was someone who loved so deeply, so completely, and without ever expecting anything in return. He knew that if she could put her life in place of Jacque’s she would, without thought. She would simply do it because she loved her friend.
She rolled over, still sound asleep, and buried her face in his neck. Decebel tucked her closer, offering her his love, shelter, and warmth. In that moment, it was all that he could give her. His mate was a woman who he would move mountains for, destroy nations for, or even build dog houses for even though they didn’t have a dog. And yet, despite his willingness to do those things, the only thing he could give her now was love and nothing more. It would be so much easier to destroy an enemy for her than to sit and see her wrestle with something that he couldn’t fight.
As his own exhaustion began to catch up with him and he felt his eyes beginning to close, he sent out a prayer to the Great Luna. “Please do not take them, not yet. They are still needed here and can still be of great service. I know, regardless of anything we do, it is ultimately you who holds your children’s lives in your hands. Spare them. Spare their child the loss of his parents. Spare my mate the loss of a sister. Spare one of my dearest friends the loss of his son. Please hear me. Please. Hear me.”
Jennifer stirred and then sat up.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, watching her face closely.
“With all the crap going on, I totally forgot about Bethany and Drake. Peri was supposed to have taken them to our pack mansion, but she said she was going to lock Drake up. Crap, I wonder if Bethany is okay.” She started to get up but Decebel pulled her back down.
“I will call and have someone check on them.”
She looked like she might argue but then surprised him. “Fine. But tell them to take them food and water and blankets and pillows. Oh and tell them not to get near Bethany or the cage for that matter. Drake is feral, or he was when he found his mate bleeding, locked in a cell in the vampires’ coven. I don’t know if he’s going to be able to control himself, even with Bethany with him.” She let out a deep breath and nodded. “I think that’s it. Oh, also tell them to tell Bethany where a bathroom is. She probably hasn’t gotten to shower or pee alone in a very long time.”
Decebel stared at her. “You never cease to amaze me,” he said as he reached for his cell phone on the nightstand. “Here you are hurting and worried about your two best friends and yet you’re also continuing to lead your pack. I couldn’t have asked for a better mate or Alpha female.”
She took his compliments in stride by shrugging and saying, “Bossing people around makes me feel useful. I hate feeling helpless, B. It will drive me crazy.”
“Then I will make sure you have as many people possible to boss around for as long as you need them.”
She smiled at him, though it didn’t reach her eyes. “I love you, Dec.”
“And I’m a better man for it,” he said as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I love you, Jennifer.” He dialed the number to his fourth and gave the orders his mate had given him.
Before he could end the call Jen grabbed the phone. “And don’t scare her or I’ll rip your leg off and beat you with it.” She ended the call, tossed the phone to the side and then curled up back where she’d been sleeping. “And that is how you do it,” she mumbled against his skin.
Bethany felt weak. She was hungry and the blood Sincaro had taken had been a lot more than usual.
“Are you cold?” Drake asked her, his voice gentle.
“A little. Do you think she forgot about us?” she asked him, speaking about the woman called Peri, who had left them in the room with nothing but a cage and some sweatpants.
“I think that something has happened that has kept her from returning.”
Bethany could tell he was trying not to sound worried, but she could feel it through the bond thing between them.
“What are,” Bethany started to speak when the only door in the room flew open. She heard Drake move behind her but didn’t become alarmed until she heard snarling. Bethany turned away from the man who’d just entered the room and her eyes widened at the sight of the huge wolf. She started to back away from the cage but froze when she heard his voice.
“Maybe not, but it is my job to save these two. They are mine, Lucian. They have been mine since the first time Jacque smarted off to me. The only way I will let them go is if the Great Luna herself takes them from my hands. And even then I might argue.”
“Might?”
“Okay, I’d definitely argue. The point is, you should understand why I do this. You have seen all my lives, the millennia that I spent on my own. It has taken three thousand years for me to find my family, but I finally have and I’m not ready to lose any of them.”
She heard his sigh and knew that he just wanted to fix things for her. “Then don’t lose them. I will give you anything you need. But remember something, Perizada, they may be yours, but you are mine. It is my job to care for you. Please be mindful of that when you are putting yourself through hell.”
“You didn’t really think I’d make being my mate easy, did you?”
This made him laugh and she loved the sound of his laughter, it brought her hope. “I would be disappointed if you made it easy, female.”
“Good to know. Put on your big girl panties, wolf, because it’s going to get worse before it gets better.”
“The darker the night only means that the dawn will be that much more beautiful.”
“I’m ready for the dawn, dammit.”
“As am I, beloved. As am I.”
Decebel pulled Jen tighter against him and he felt her shiver. She was exhausted. He’d finally convinced her to get some sleep when she’d been holding Thia and had fallen asleep sitting up. Her heart was broken and he had no idea what to do to help her keep the pieces together until it could be mended. Jacque and Fane could not die. He wouldn’t allow it. If they died, it would destroy his mate. There would be a part of her that would forever be lost and he wouldn’t be able to fix it.
Jennifer was strong. She was a force to be reckoned with, but she was not impervious to anguish or loss. She was someone who loved so deeply, so completely, and without ever expecting anything in return. He knew that if she could put her life in place of Jacque’s she would, without thought. She would simply do it because she loved her friend.
She rolled over, still sound asleep, and buried her face in his neck. Decebel tucked her closer, offering her his love, shelter, and warmth. In that moment, it was all that he could give her. His mate was a woman who he would move mountains for, destroy nations for, or even build dog houses for even though they didn’t have a dog. And yet, despite his willingness to do those things, the only thing he could give her now was love and nothing more. It would be so much easier to destroy an enemy for her than to sit and see her wrestle with something that he couldn’t fight.
As his own exhaustion began to catch up with him and he felt his eyes beginning to close, he sent out a prayer to the Great Luna. “Please do not take them, not yet. They are still needed here and can still be of great service. I know, regardless of anything we do, it is ultimately you who holds your children’s lives in your hands. Spare them. Spare their child the loss of his parents. Spare my mate the loss of a sister. Spare one of my dearest friends the loss of his son. Please hear me. Please. Hear me.”
Jennifer stirred and then sat up.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, watching her face closely.
“With all the crap going on, I totally forgot about Bethany and Drake. Peri was supposed to have taken them to our pack mansion, but she said she was going to lock Drake up. Crap, I wonder if Bethany is okay.” She started to get up but Decebel pulled her back down.
“I will call and have someone check on them.”
She looked like she might argue but then surprised him. “Fine. But tell them to take them food and water and blankets and pillows. Oh and tell them not to get near Bethany or the cage for that matter. Drake is feral, or he was when he found his mate bleeding, locked in a cell in the vampires’ coven. I don’t know if he’s going to be able to control himself, even with Bethany with him.” She let out a deep breath and nodded. “I think that’s it. Oh, also tell them to tell Bethany where a bathroom is. She probably hasn’t gotten to shower or pee alone in a very long time.”
Decebel stared at her. “You never cease to amaze me,” he said as he reached for his cell phone on the nightstand. “Here you are hurting and worried about your two best friends and yet you’re also continuing to lead your pack. I couldn’t have asked for a better mate or Alpha female.”
She took his compliments in stride by shrugging and saying, “Bossing people around makes me feel useful. I hate feeling helpless, B. It will drive me crazy.”
“Then I will make sure you have as many people possible to boss around for as long as you need them.”
She smiled at him, though it didn’t reach her eyes. “I love you, Dec.”
“And I’m a better man for it,” he said as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I love you, Jennifer.” He dialed the number to his fourth and gave the orders his mate had given him.
Before he could end the call Jen grabbed the phone. “And don’t scare her or I’ll rip your leg off and beat you with it.” She ended the call, tossed the phone to the side and then curled up back where she’d been sleeping. “And that is how you do it,” she mumbled against his skin.
Bethany felt weak. She was hungry and the blood Sincaro had taken had been a lot more than usual.
“Are you cold?” Drake asked her, his voice gentle.
“A little. Do you think she forgot about us?” she asked him, speaking about the woman called Peri, who had left them in the room with nothing but a cage and some sweatpants.
“I think that something has happened that has kept her from returning.”
Bethany could tell he was trying not to sound worried, but she could feel it through the bond thing between them.
“What are,” Bethany started to speak when the only door in the room flew open. She heard Drake move behind her but didn’t become alarmed until she heard snarling. Bethany turned away from the man who’d just entered the room and her eyes widened at the sight of the huge wolf. She started to back away from the cage but froze when she heard his voice.
