Denied
Page 23
‘Thank you,’ he murmurs quietly, his breath feathering against my cheek before his lips come down on my mouth softly. He’s gentle, almost cautious, as he caresses my tongue with his, slowly breaking me down. ‘Hold me.’
‘If I do that, I’m yours again.’ I force myself to step away from him, leaving him still bent with eyes searching mine.
‘I’ve made reservations for dinner.’ He straightens up. ‘Will you do me the honour of joining me?’
I’m a mess of conflicting thoughts, struggling to figure out if Miller is my destiny. But as his palm gingerly slides around my back and his heated touch burns through the material of my T-shirt, I think of something. ‘Where were you last night?’
I don’t imagine the slight stiffness on his palm against me and the edge of guilt in those eyes. ‘Come to dinner with me.’
He did. He broke into my house. That’s . . . creepy! I feel violated. ‘You undressed me?’ I can’t believe I didn’t wake. ‘I wasn’t dreaming, was I?’
‘I hope so. And when you’re not dreaming of me, I hope you’re constantly thinking of me.’
‘I’m thinking you have a problem!’
‘I did,’ he replies quickly, deadly serious. ‘My world was fading into blackness again and the only thing that can keep it light keeps running away!’
I flinch at the genuine irritation in his voice. ‘I have questions.’
He nods mildly and takes a deep breath, gathering some calm. ‘I’m ready to answer anything you’d like to ask me.’
My relief is immense, but so is my dread. I’m not sure I want to hear his answers. ‘Over dinner,’ I assert. We need to be on neutral ground. No bed in sight. ‘Just dinner.’ This will be done my way. I may have laid my cards before, but they can still be turned back over. Actually, they absolutely can’t, but Miller doesn’t need to know that.
‘Just dinner,’ he agrees, but I can tell it’s a reluctant agreement.
‘You don’t get to taste me or touch me.’ I don’t know why I’m saying such a stupid thing. I’m desperate for the comfort he offers me.
The dash of annoyance that passes over his perfect face makes me all the more determined. He can turn on his arrogant, gentlemanly charm and have me just as quick as the soft, attentive lover. ‘Now you’re just being silly.’
I shake my head. ‘I won’t come if you’re planning on winning me over by worshipping me.’ It’ll be game over. I’m still taken by him, even with my growing wariness and knowledge.
‘Fine. As you wish,’ he mutters.
I nod and gather myself. ‘Where should I meet you?’
‘Meet me?’ His forehead furrows.
‘I’ll meet you at the restaurant.’ Miller picking me up is too familiar, and I can’t allow Nan to think all is well when it isn’t.
That declaration gains me a flash of irritation, but he contains it coolly. Delving back into solace with Miller is dangerous, but I fear I have no other choice and not just because he doesn’t appear to be giving me one. He’s back in my life, and I really want him to be. I need his comfort, his thing, his words. I need it all. Nothing has ever made me feel so protected but at the same time so utterly vulnerable. And nothing has made me feel so strong, yet so incredibly weak. There has to be a middle ground.
‘Fine.’ He exhales a mixture of frustration and annoyance. ‘When did you become so difficult?’
‘The second you touched me,’ I reply quietly, finding the sass that has become paramount since I fell into the curious world of Miller Hart. I won’t survive without it. I won’t survive him without it.
His palm lifts slowly and cups my cheek, stroking slow circles. ‘The second I looked at you, I saw light through my constant darkness.’ He moves in, his mouth getting closer, my eyes focused only there. ‘I saw bright, hopeful light reflecting back at me through those beautiful sapphire eyes.’ He doesn’t kiss me; he just keeps our mouths close, his breath spreading across my face, enhancing the sense of warmth coursing through me. My eyes close. ‘I’ll respect your request for this evening. But remember, you are my possession, Olivia. You’re my habit, and I’m not going down without a fight.’ He releases me, leaving me breathless, dizzy and feeling abandoned. I open my lids to face torturous beauty. ‘And I won’t lose no matter who takes me on. Even you.’
‘Where shall I meet you?’ I breathe, not caring to challenge him on his confident claim. I’ve seen him in action, fists flying, and I’ve also felt him in action . . . worshipping action. All challengers are doomed. Including me.
‘Seven o’clock here.’ He takes a pen from his inside pocket and scribbles an address on an old receipt from his wallet before handing it to me. ‘I’ll be waiting.’
I nod as he starts to back away, smoothing down his suit before sliding his hands into his pockets. Our eyes lock. I see hope there. I see confidence. I see fear. And I see caution. But I’m not sure if that caution is for him or for me. Probably both.
Miller breaks the eye connection, then turns away from me and strolls off to his car.
My palms hit my cheeks and rub some life back into them. I feel hot, my mind a jumbled mess of contradicting thoughts, worries . . . fear. I’m frightened of him, but he makes me feel unbelievably safe. I’m worried about him, but I’m worried about me, too. I can’t even fathom my thought process, which is jumping from surrendering to fighting harder against him. Nothing is making sense.
I’m in a world of my own, trying to figure out too much, when I find my palm stroking my nape. The hairs are dancing wildly under my touch, tingling, making my skin buzz.
‘This is exactly what I was afraid of.’ The velvet voice pulls my body around slowly, warily, and my heart sprints up to my throat.
Chapter Nine
I’m not sure whether I should be relieved or worried by what I find. William is leaning against his Lexus, arms crossed, ankles crossed. He doesn’t look happy, his typically sparkling grey eyes fractious and his soft features cut with annoyance.
‘You’re following me?’ My question spills on a guilty gasp – the guilt for my weakness where Miller’s concerned, the gasp for my shock at finding William here.
‘I’ve been trying to call you.’ He pushes his body away from the car and strolls over casually until his hulking frame is towering over me. ‘Where’s the phone I bought you?’
‘I haven’t charged it.’ I divert my eyes downward, for what reason I don’t know. He might be right about Miller, but I’m not answerable to him. London’s most notorious male escort may have resided in a dark place, but I’m making it light. He wants to change for me. I have to make my own decisions. I’m the master of my own destiny.
‘Then you will,’ he orders. ‘Tell me why you were at his club.’
I look up, shocked. ‘You have been following me!’
‘I told you before. I make it my business to know what happens in this world. When I heard of an incident at Ice involving Miller Hart and a pretty little blonde, it didn’t take long to figure out who the pretty little blonde was.’ He cups my jaw and lifts my chin. ‘Walk away.’
‘If I do that, I’m yours again.’ I force myself to step away from him, leaving him still bent with eyes searching mine.
‘I’ve made reservations for dinner.’ He straightens up. ‘Will you do me the honour of joining me?’
I’m a mess of conflicting thoughts, struggling to figure out if Miller is my destiny. But as his palm gingerly slides around my back and his heated touch burns through the material of my T-shirt, I think of something. ‘Where were you last night?’
I don’t imagine the slight stiffness on his palm against me and the edge of guilt in those eyes. ‘Come to dinner with me.’
He did. He broke into my house. That’s . . . creepy! I feel violated. ‘You undressed me?’ I can’t believe I didn’t wake. ‘I wasn’t dreaming, was I?’
‘I hope so. And when you’re not dreaming of me, I hope you’re constantly thinking of me.’
‘I’m thinking you have a problem!’
‘I did,’ he replies quickly, deadly serious. ‘My world was fading into blackness again and the only thing that can keep it light keeps running away!’
I flinch at the genuine irritation in his voice. ‘I have questions.’
He nods mildly and takes a deep breath, gathering some calm. ‘I’m ready to answer anything you’d like to ask me.’
My relief is immense, but so is my dread. I’m not sure I want to hear his answers. ‘Over dinner,’ I assert. We need to be on neutral ground. No bed in sight. ‘Just dinner.’ This will be done my way. I may have laid my cards before, but they can still be turned back over. Actually, they absolutely can’t, but Miller doesn’t need to know that.
‘Just dinner,’ he agrees, but I can tell it’s a reluctant agreement.
‘You don’t get to taste me or touch me.’ I don’t know why I’m saying such a stupid thing. I’m desperate for the comfort he offers me.
The dash of annoyance that passes over his perfect face makes me all the more determined. He can turn on his arrogant, gentlemanly charm and have me just as quick as the soft, attentive lover. ‘Now you’re just being silly.’
I shake my head. ‘I won’t come if you’re planning on winning me over by worshipping me.’ It’ll be game over. I’m still taken by him, even with my growing wariness and knowledge.
‘Fine. As you wish,’ he mutters.
I nod and gather myself. ‘Where should I meet you?’
‘Meet me?’ His forehead furrows.
‘I’ll meet you at the restaurant.’ Miller picking me up is too familiar, and I can’t allow Nan to think all is well when it isn’t.
That declaration gains me a flash of irritation, but he contains it coolly. Delving back into solace with Miller is dangerous, but I fear I have no other choice and not just because he doesn’t appear to be giving me one. He’s back in my life, and I really want him to be. I need his comfort, his thing, his words. I need it all. Nothing has ever made me feel so protected but at the same time so utterly vulnerable. And nothing has made me feel so strong, yet so incredibly weak. There has to be a middle ground.
‘Fine.’ He exhales a mixture of frustration and annoyance. ‘When did you become so difficult?’
‘The second you touched me,’ I reply quietly, finding the sass that has become paramount since I fell into the curious world of Miller Hart. I won’t survive without it. I won’t survive him without it.
His palm lifts slowly and cups my cheek, stroking slow circles. ‘The second I looked at you, I saw light through my constant darkness.’ He moves in, his mouth getting closer, my eyes focused only there. ‘I saw bright, hopeful light reflecting back at me through those beautiful sapphire eyes.’ He doesn’t kiss me; he just keeps our mouths close, his breath spreading across my face, enhancing the sense of warmth coursing through me. My eyes close. ‘I’ll respect your request for this evening. But remember, you are my possession, Olivia. You’re my habit, and I’m not going down without a fight.’ He releases me, leaving me breathless, dizzy and feeling abandoned. I open my lids to face torturous beauty. ‘And I won’t lose no matter who takes me on. Even you.’
‘Where shall I meet you?’ I breathe, not caring to challenge him on his confident claim. I’ve seen him in action, fists flying, and I’ve also felt him in action . . . worshipping action. All challengers are doomed. Including me.
‘Seven o’clock here.’ He takes a pen from his inside pocket and scribbles an address on an old receipt from his wallet before handing it to me. ‘I’ll be waiting.’
I nod as he starts to back away, smoothing down his suit before sliding his hands into his pockets. Our eyes lock. I see hope there. I see confidence. I see fear. And I see caution. But I’m not sure if that caution is for him or for me. Probably both.
Miller breaks the eye connection, then turns away from me and strolls off to his car.
My palms hit my cheeks and rub some life back into them. I feel hot, my mind a jumbled mess of contradicting thoughts, worries . . . fear. I’m frightened of him, but he makes me feel unbelievably safe. I’m worried about him, but I’m worried about me, too. I can’t even fathom my thought process, which is jumping from surrendering to fighting harder against him. Nothing is making sense.
I’m in a world of my own, trying to figure out too much, when I find my palm stroking my nape. The hairs are dancing wildly under my touch, tingling, making my skin buzz.
‘This is exactly what I was afraid of.’ The velvet voice pulls my body around slowly, warily, and my heart sprints up to my throat.
Chapter Nine
I’m not sure whether I should be relieved or worried by what I find. William is leaning against his Lexus, arms crossed, ankles crossed. He doesn’t look happy, his typically sparkling grey eyes fractious and his soft features cut with annoyance.
‘You’re following me?’ My question spills on a guilty gasp – the guilt for my weakness where Miller’s concerned, the gasp for my shock at finding William here.
‘I’ve been trying to call you.’ He pushes his body away from the car and strolls over casually until his hulking frame is towering over me. ‘Where’s the phone I bought you?’
‘I haven’t charged it.’ I divert my eyes downward, for what reason I don’t know. He might be right about Miller, but I’m not answerable to him. London’s most notorious male escort may have resided in a dark place, but I’m making it light. He wants to change for me. I have to make my own decisions. I’m the master of my own destiny.
‘Then you will,’ he orders. ‘Tell me why you were at his club.’
I look up, shocked. ‘You have been following me!’
‘I told you before. I make it my business to know what happens in this world. When I heard of an incident at Ice involving Miller Hart and a pretty little blonde, it didn’t take long to figure out who the pretty little blonde was.’ He cups my jaw and lifts my chin. ‘Walk away.’
