Easy to Love You
Page 21
She looked up at Lynn, slightly breathless and smiled. Task complete.
Lynn smiled, “Very good. If you can do it back I’ll sign the paperwork and be on my way.”
CC loved a challenge and she completed it just as gracefully as she had on the way there. I went over to her, kissed her head, then bent down and let her kiss Ryder.
“Mommy’s a fighter huh, big guy?” I said to him.
“I look up to the best, Chunky Monkey.” CC said, beaming up at me.
Lynn cleared her throat, “Here is a copy of the paperwork, please be sure to follow up with the specialist in a few weeks to see if the cast can be removed.” Lynn tossed the paperwork on the bed.
CC squealed and flung herself back on the bed. I raised my eyebrows at the nurse, “Thanks for everything, Lynn.” I followed behind her down the stairs to see her out.
She opened the door but stopped before stepping out and turned to look at me, “If there’s anything,” she emphasized the word anything, “At all, I can do for you; here’s my cell phone number.”
She held her hand out for me to take the card but I just said, “No thanks, we’ll be fine.”
She looked like I’d slapped her, she huffed and then turned on her heel and left.
Ryder and I took the steps two at a time to get back upstairs to CC. When we walked in she was laying there resting her eyes. “You ok?”
She opened her eyes and smiled, “Better than ok.”
Ryder started fussing; it was about time for him to eat. “Someone’s hungry.”
“Yeah it’s about that time; here lay him next to me while you go get the bottle ready.” I placed him next to her on the bed and went to make up the formula.
A few minutes later, I was heading back upstairs when I heard singing. I stopped and listened, her voice was so soothing and calm. Ryder must have thought so too, because he wasn’t making a sound. I crept to the door and peeked in, not wanting to interrupt her.
She must have sensed me because she stopped and stared at me. “Don’t stop. He likes it.” I said, glancing down at Ryder.
I looked back up at her and she was blushing, “I can’t sing while you’re watching me.”
I climbed onto the bed; Ryder snuggled between me and his mother. I reached over and tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear. “Marry me tomorrow.”
She giggled, “No way. I’m not getting married with these ugly ass casts.”
We laid there for a while just staring at one another, words weren’t needed to explain how we were feeling. I knew I was in trouble all those years ago when I’d first laid eyes on CC; to this day I still got butterflies when she looked at me. It was like she could see me, everything about me, the good, the bad and the ugly, and she still loved me.
After I finished cooking dinner for CC, Jaylinn, Cooper and myself, we were all sitting on the couch when CC leaned over to me. “So do you think you can help me in the shower? This is my gift to myself for losing the bitch.”
Before I could answer Cooper said, “You got rid of the bitchmobile?”
“Yes!” CC answered a little too loudly and caused Ryder to jump in Jaylinn’s arms.
Cooper laughed and that set Ryder off; I laughed when Cooper grimaced at the cries. “You better watch out, he’s got a heavy hand.” I joked with him. The other day he and I were changing Ryder while Jaylinn painted CC’s toe nails and Cooper had his face in range of Ryder’s hands and he hit him right on the nose. Cooper joked that he had heavy hands and was going to grow up to be an MMA fighter.
“Anyway, can you help me?” CC was giving me the puppy dog eyes and she knew I couldn’t say no.
“Go!” Jaylinn said, “Cooper and I got this tonight.”
I winked at my sister, scooped up CC and hauled ass upstairs. I couldn’t wait to get her na**d with me and not have to worry about Ryder crying before we were even halfway undressed.
I set CC on the counter, turned the shower on and then grabbed two towels and threw them on the toilet seat.
“Maybe this isn’t such a good idea.” CC said timidly.
I was taken aback, how could this not be a good idea? Then it started to come to me, she’s probably a little nervous, I haven’t seen her na**d in a while and barely at all since she’d had the baby.
I finally forced myself to move. I pulled her shirt off and then reached behind her, I unclasped her bra and pulled back slightly so it could slip off her arms. I willed myself not to stare at her body. She had been hiding it from me since she’d woken up, I didn’t have the heart to tell her I’d seen all of the bruises and scars already.
I reached under the sink, grabbed the plastic bags and tape to cover her wrist and ankle. Once that was out of the way, without breaking eye contact I lifted her off the sink and steadied her, then hooked my fingers on both sides of her panties, and pulled them down her h*ps until they rested at her feet where she could step out of them. Her eyes stayed on mine as I pulled off my boxer-briefs.
As we stepped into the shower together, I adjusted the setting so we wouldn’t burn our skin and then I pulled her into my arms under the flow of water. Her whole body started shaking, I knew she was nervous about me seeing her na**d for the first time since the accident. No matter what she thought she looked like, she would always be perfect to me. After a few minutes of holding her, she sighed and rested her head on my shoulder. I planted my feet so I wouldn’t slide and take her down with me; I knew taking a shower with two casts on couldn’t be easy for anyone.
I kissed her cheek and whispered, “I love you, nothing is ever going to change that, CC. I need you to believe it though, trust me.”
“I do. It just still makes me a little uncomfortable.” She whispered back to me, squeezing me a little closer to her.
I pulled her away from my body carefully, but didn’t let go. “I never want you to be uncomfortable, ever. We’ve been through too much shit to let something like this get in our way. Out of everything that’s happened; we have a little piece of us waiting on the other side of that door. I can’t even begin to explain the feelings I get watching you with him.” She looked down, but I lifted her chin back up until she looked into my eyes. “All of these scars on your body will fade and settle into the back of your mind. All but one, and it’s the best one. You protected Ryder, CC. These scars are proof of that, if you didn’t do what you did; there’s a good chance he wouldn’t be here with us.”
Lynn smiled, “Very good. If you can do it back I’ll sign the paperwork and be on my way.”
CC loved a challenge and she completed it just as gracefully as she had on the way there. I went over to her, kissed her head, then bent down and let her kiss Ryder.
“Mommy’s a fighter huh, big guy?” I said to him.
“I look up to the best, Chunky Monkey.” CC said, beaming up at me.
Lynn cleared her throat, “Here is a copy of the paperwork, please be sure to follow up with the specialist in a few weeks to see if the cast can be removed.” Lynn tossed the paperwork on the bed.
CC squealed and flung herself back on the bed. I raised my eyebrows at the nurse, “Thanks for everything, Lynn.” I followed behind her down the stairs to see her out.
She opened the door but stopped before stepping out and turned to look at me, “If there’s anything,” she emphasized the word anything, “At all, I can do for you; here’s my cell phone number.”
She held her hand out for me to take the card but I just said, “No thanks, we’ll be fine.”
She looked like I’d slapped her, she huffed and then turned on her heel and left.
Ryder and I took the steps two at a time to get back upstairs to CC. When we walked in she was laying there resting her eyes. “You ok?”
She opened her eyes and smiled, “Better than ok.”
Ryder started fussing; it was about time for him to eat. “Someone’s hungry.”
“Yeah it’s about that time; here lay him next to me while you go get the bottle ready.” I placed him next to her on the bed and went to make up the formula.
A few minutes later, I was heading back upstairs when I heard singing. I stopped and listened, her voice was so soothing and calm. Ryder must have thought so too, because he wasn’t making a sound. I crept to the door and peeked in, not wanting to interrupt her.
She must have sensed me because she stopped and stared at me. “Don’t stop. He likes it.” I said, glancing down at Ryder.
I looked back up at her and she was blushing, “I can’t sing while you’re watching me.”
I climbed onto the bed; Ryder snuggled between me and his mother. I reached over and tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear. “Marry me tomorrow.”
She giggled, “No way. I’m not getting married with these ugly ass casts.”
We laid there for a while just staring at one another, words weren’t needed to explain how we were feeling. I knew I was in trouble all those years ago when I’d first laid eyes on CC; to this day I still got butterflies when she looked at me. It was like she could see me, everything about me, the good, the bad and the ugly, and she still loved me.
After I finished cooking dinner for CC, Jaylinn, Cooper and myself, we were all sitting on the couch when CC leaned over to me. “So do you think you can help me in the shower? This is my gift to myself for losing the bitch.”
Before I could answer Cooper said, “You got rid of the bitchmobile?”
“Yes!” CC answered a little too loudly and caused Ryder to jump in Jaylinn’s arms.
Cooper laughed and that set Ryder off; I laughed when Cooper grimaced at the cries. “You better watch out, he’s got a heavy hand.” I joked with him. The other day he and I were changing Ryder while Jaylinn painted CC’s toe nails and Cooper had his face in range of Ryder’s hands and he hit him right on the nose. Cooper joked that he had heavy hands and was going to grow up to be an MMA fighter.
“Anyway, can you help me?” CC was giving me the puppy dog eyes and she knew I couldn’t say no.
“Go!” Jaylinn said, “Cooper and I got this tonight.”
I winked at my sister, scooped up CC and hauled ass upstairs. I couldn’t wait to get her na**d with me and not have to worry about Ryder crying before we were even halfway undressed.
I set CC on the counter, turned the shower on and then grabbed two towels and threw them on the toilet seat.
“Maybe this isn’t such a good idea.” CC said timidly.
I was taken aback, how could this not be a good idea? Then it started to come to me, she’s probably a little nervous, I haven’t seen her na**d in a while and barely at all since she’d had the baby.
I finally forced myself to move. I pulled her shirt off and then reached behind her, I unclasped her bra and pulled back slightly so it could slip off her arms. I willed myself not to stare at her body. She had been hiding it from me since she’d woken up, I didn’t have the heart to tell her I’d seen all of the bruises and scars already.
I reached under the sink, grabbed the plastic bags and tape to cover her wrist and ankle. Once that was out of the way, without breaking eye contact I lifted her off the sink and steadied her, then hooked my fingers on both sides of her panties, and pulled them down her h*ps until they rested at her feet where she could step out of them. Her eyes stayed on mine as I pulled off my boxer-briefs.
As we stepped into the shower together, I adjusted the setting so we wouldn’t burn our skin and then I pulled her into my arms under the flow of water. Her whole body started shaking, I knew she was nervous about me seeing her na**d for the first time since the accident. No matter what she thought she looked like, she would always be perfect to me. After a few minutes of holding her, she sighed and rested her head on my shoulder. I planted my feet so I wouldn’t slide and take her down with me; I knew taking a shower with two casts on couldn’t be easy for anyone.
I kissed her cheek and whispered, “I love you, nothing is ever going to change that, CC. I need you to believe it though, trust me.”
“I do. It just still makes me a little uncomfortable.” She whispered back to me, squeezing me a little closer to her.
I pulled her away from my body carefully, but didn’t let go. “I never want you to be uncomfortable, ever. We’ve been through too much shit to let something like this get in our way. Out of everything that’s happened; we have a little piece of us waiting on the other side of that door. I can’t even begin to explain the feelings I get watching you with him.” She looked down, but I lifted her chin back up until she looked into my eyes. “All of these scars on your body will fade and settle into the back of your mind. All but one, and it’s the best one. You protected Ryder, CC. These scars are proof of that, if you didn’t do what you did; there’s a good chance he wouldn’t be here with us.”
