Elphame's Choice

Chapter Four

"I can't wait to see the rest of it." Elphame shook herself from her happy trance and started determinedly forward.
"Not without me, you're not."
Cuchulainn dismounted quickly and looped the gelding's reins over the nearest tree. He jogged to her side and as they approached the burnt-out doors the sound of his claymore being unsheathed was deadly music in the morning's stillness.
Elphame stopped and frowned at the sword. "Do you really think that is necessary?"
"I would rather err on the side of safety than of foolishness."
She planted her hands on her hips and looked down her regal nose at him. "Are you saying I'm foolish?"
"No." He smiled, pleased that she was reacting more like the El he knew. "I'm saying that I'm not going to be."
She wrinkled her nose at him before striding toward the entrance.
"You are stubborn and hardheaded," Cuchulainn yelled, grinning at her when she glared over her shoulder at him. "But that's part of what I like about you."
"Hush and catch up with me. I'm sure there's some maniacal squirrel lurking within from which I need to be protected because I'm so very helpless___" She pretended a maidenly swoon, in the middle of which she leaned forward and bunched her powerful leg muscles, purposefully sprinting ahead of her brother so that he was breathing hard and muttering to himself about her being half-horse and definitely not helpless when he finally caught up with her.
She was waiting for him, standing silently just outside the castle's entrance. Weeds and vines had overgrown the space where the great doors had once rested, so that brother and sister had to hack a small path before they could force their way through. Elphame was the first to step within the confines of the walls. Her brother followed closely.
The tangle of weeds ended once they were within the castle's walls. They were in a spacious area between the outer walls and the beginning of the castle proper.
Cuchulainn glanced curiously around. To either side were the remains of what was once a sentry walk that - must have stretched all along the castle's massive walls. Cu frowned. Too bad MacCallan hadn't posted lookouts there.
"Look, Cu, I'll bet there were beautiful wooden doors here once." Elphame's voice was hushed, like she'd entered a church.
Cuchulainn followed her through another gap in smaller, inner walls and they entered what had obviously been a grand courtyard. The floor was covered with debris and layered with filth and time, but here and there could still be glimpsed patches of the smooth stone that had held the muffled tread of the Clan MacCallan for decades. Huge pillars of carved stone ringed the area, rising up to meet what was once a vaulted ceiling, but was now open to the brilliance of the morning sky. The massive pillars still bore the black scars of the fire that had been the death of the castle.
Elphame swallowed past the dryness in her throat. "Do you think we'll find any - " she paused and met her brother's gaze " - remains of the warriors?"
"I shouldn't think so. It's been a long time. What the fire didn't consume, time and the elements surely would." Still, just the thought made him peer suspiciously at some of the more obscure mounds of leaves and dirt.
"But if we do find any trace of the MacCallan warriors, we must give them a proper burial. They would approve of that." Elphame spoke with quiet surety.
"Can you Feel them, El?" her brother asked.
"The warriors?"
He nodded.
She stood very still, cocking her head as if she were trying to listen for a voice in the wind.
"Wait, I cannot be certain."
Slowly she moved to the centermost of the blackened pillars, which was so broad that brother and sister couldn't have touched fingertips if they had stood around its base, arms outstretched. That close, Elphame could see that the pillar had been intricately carved in a circular pattern of interwoven knots that linked together to form lovely designs filled with birds and flowers and rearing mares. Even through the layers of soot and filth the beauty of the workmanship was obvious.
"You must have been something to see," Elphame whispered to the pillar.
Instantly a strange answering hum throbbed through her body.
"Oh!" She gasped.
"What is it, El?" In two strides Cuchulainn was beside her, claymore gripped tightly in his strong hand.
She spared him a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, it's nothing bad." Then she refocused her attention on the pillar. "I can Feel something here - in this stone."
While she studied it Elphame suddenly became aware of a sentience. It was a listening presence. It's where the humming comes from, she thought. Ignoring her brother's restless watchfulness, Elphame placed her slender hands against the time-worn column. As her flesh met stone it seemed like the surface of the column quivered. In silent wonder, she caressed it. For a moment the massive column appeared to liquefy under her palms, almost as if her touch somehow made the stone claylike and malleable. Then her hands and the section of the column she touched began to shimmer, and the radiance moved up her arms in a rush of warmth to surround her body. She was filled with an astonishing sensation, like she had been immersed in a warm pool of emotion, or had been wrapped securely within her mother's embrace.
Elphame's hands shook - not from fear, but from the sheer beauty of it.
"Oh." Her breath came out in a rush. "Oh, yes! I can Feel them." Her face beamed with emotion.
"It is not the warriors you Feel, Goddess." The deep voice came from behind them, splitting the silence like a hot knife through snow.
Cuchulainn moved with blurring speed to take a stand between his sister and the intruder, claymore before him held at the ready.
"Danann! That is an excellent way to be assured that you do not die quietly in your sleep from old age, Stonemaster." Cuchulainn's hand shook from unused adrenaline as he sheathed his sword, but the old centaur paid little attention to the warrior. His gaze was focused on Elphame, as was her's on him.
"If I am not Feeling the spirits of the warriors, then what is it that I Feel?" she asked.
At the sound of his voice, Elphame had broken contact with the pillar, but her hands still tingled with the residue of the stone's warmth. Now she waited expectantly for Danann's answer. All of Partholon knew that Epona had gifted the centaur with a special affinity for the earth. The spirits of nature spoke to him through stone, which was why Elphame had requested that the Stonemaster join the team to rebuild MacCallan Castle, even though at his advanced age he was more inclined to nap in the sun than to erect temple walls. But he remained the most revered stonemason in Partholon. He could hear spirits within stones, so he could literally choose the perfect stone for each building. With the renowned centaur Stonemaster to guide the renovations, she could be sure that what she rebuilt would stand harmoniously for centuries.
The centaur approached Elphame and the column that stood behind her with an energetic stride that belied his years. He studied the stone at first without touching it. When he spoke his voice had a dreamy, faraway sound.
"This is the great central column of MacCallan Castle. Once it was the strength of the castle." He smiled at her. "It is the spirit of the stone you Feel - the very heart of the castle itself - not the spirits of dead warriors."
Gently, he raised his hand and placed it against the column. "Touch it again, Goddess. You have nothing to fear."
"I'm not afraid of it," Elphame said quickly. Without hesitation she placed her smooth, unlined hand beside the centaur's age-creased one. Danann closed his eyes in concentration.
The glow began beneath her palm and it spread quickly to encompass both Elphame and Danann. Again, a surge of Feeling washed through her. She was ready for it and she concentrated, trying to sift through fragments of emotions that were almost spoken. Joy - she caught the word as happiness engulfed her___
Peace -
Elphame wanted to laugh aloud... An end to waiting -  the phrase flitted playfully through her mind.
Then the glow faded, leaving Elphame breathless and giddy.
"I knew it! I Felt it as I stepped within these walls," the old Stonemaster shouted. He turned his head so that when he opened his eyes their clear, blue depths reflected her face.
"You are attuned to the heart of this castle, Goddess. The stones themselves welcome you. They rejoice that their mistress has arrived." His smile was rich with warmth. "Like your ancestress, Rhiannon, you have the ability to hear the spirits of the earth."
"Not until now I haven't! Not until I came here!" she cried joyously. Magic! She had finally been gifted with more than a physical aberration.
Impulsively, Elphame placed her hand over the hand Danann still pressed against the column and squeezed gratefully. Almost instantly she was sorry she had followed her impulse. Except for members of her family, she made it a point never to touch others. One of her earliest memories was of an incident involving the daughter of a visiting clan chieftain. The adults had been busy discussing whatever it was adults discussed. Young Elphame had become bored and had taken the opportunity to tap the arm of the Chieftain's daughter - she'd been trying to get her attention quietly so that the two of them could sneak off and play. The child had shrieked at Elphame's touch, screaming that the Goddess had marked her and that she was surely going to die. No amount of cajoling could dissuade the little girl from her hysterics. The clan chieftain had left hastily, casting fearful glances at Elphame - even after Etain had assured him that Epona was not interested in the life of her daughter.
Earth spirits might speak to her and the stones welcome her, but mortals did not like being touched by a living goddess.
With a little gasp, Elphame tried to take her hand from Danann's before he could shrink from her touch, but instead of allowing her to pull away from him, Danann turned his palm up and clasped her hand within his.
"The spirits of the stone tell me that this is where you belong."
Elphame felt her face flush. "For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to bring MacCallan Castle back to life," she blurted. "Thank you for joining us here, Danann. Your presence means much to me."
"I am honored to be of service to you, Goddess," he said simply, squeezing her hand before releasing it.
He did not pull away from her in fear or bow down before her in stunned reverence.
It's like she was just an ordinary clan chieftain asking for his help. The thought was so unexpected that Elphame blinked in surprise, and turned quickly to her brother to hide her awkwardness.
"Cu, can you believe that I can Feel the spirit in the stones?"
"Of course I believe it." He smiled at his sister, glad that she looked so happy and animated - almost glad enough to forget how disconcerting it had been to watch the magical glow of the stone engulf her.
He had to remember that it was different for her. He was a warrior; he wanted no traffic with things he couldn't best with the stroke of a blade, but Elphame had never felt his unease for magic and the spirit realm. Though she spoke little of it, even to him, Cu knew that his sister had always yearned for a spiritual connection to the Goddess who had so obviously fashioned her body. Elphame was the firstborn daughter of the Chosen of Epona. It was never a certainty, but often the Goddess called the eldest daughter of an aging Chosen to follow her mother as spiritual leader of Partholon. Epona could be grooming Elphame for the day she would take her mother's place. It was the way of the world, Cu reminded himself. He shook off his trepidation and approached Danann, clasping the old centaur's hand in a warm greeting.
"I believe I am better at hearing spirits than I am at surprising a warrior guarding his sister," Danann said wryly.
"Oh, I would say you did a good job of surprising me," Cuchulainn said.
"Cu has been twitchy since last night. Just ignore him," Elphame said as she butted her shoulder against her brother's, grinning at him.
Cuchulainn ignored El's teasing. "Did you come alone, Danann?"
The Stonemaster shook his head and gestured toward the weed-strewn entrance. "No, I joined the rest of your party as they left Loth Tor. They chose to wait outside the walls of the castle. They were not overeager to enter." He shrugged his shoulders and smiled. "The young are often easily frightened by little more than bedtime stories and shadows."
Elphame felt a rush of gratitude for the centaur's common-sense attitude. "And isn't it just like young men." She gave her brother a look of sisterly annoyance, lumping him in the ne'er-do-well category.
"Instead of getting busy they stand about waiting to be told what to do."
With practiced flair Danann bowed to her, bending one silver-tipped foreleg, while extending the other.
Offering his arm in an old courtly gesture, he said, "Then, Goddess, shall I escort you so that you might give the young some direction before they waste their lives in idleness?"
Elphame hesitated. Was she really going to touch someone outside her family twice in one day? She looked from the old centaur's gallantly offered arm to her brother. Cuchulainn winked at her and nodded.
She took a deep breath and rested her hand on the Stone-master's forearm. Her fingers trembled only a little.
Just like a normal person, she thought, unable to contain her smile.
With Cu following close behind, they retraced the path from the ruins of the courtyard back through the gap in the ancient walls to where their party waited.
As Danann had noted, they were a youthful group -  most of them younger sons who had been willing to embark upon the adventure of restoring MacCallan Castle because they had the desire to carve their own way in the world. There would be land and opportunity if MacCallan Castle lived again - and that had spelled excitement to their hot blood.
And then there was the young goddess, Elphame. All of Partholon knew that she had been given to them by Epona as a special blessing, but no one quite understood why. Epona's ways were often mysterious.
She was a benevolent Goddess, but She did not often meddle with the day-to-day activities of Her people; instead She chose one woman - someone with whom She had a special bond, and it was through this Chosen One that Epona led Her people. That Elphame had been marked so obviously by Partholon's deity, especially while her mother still reigned as Goddess Incarnate, had been a source of awe and speculation for twenty-five years. Epona had touched Elphame, and now Elphame was determined to restore MacCallan Castle. Surely the honor of accompanying her in her quest would bring them luck that even rumors of the MacCallan curse couldn't tarnish. Or at least that was what they had told themselves as they joined her. They had even believed it, until they had come face-to-face with the crumbling walls of the war-torn castle.
As Elphame stepped into view the men and centaurs who had been gathered nervously several feet from the entrance fell silent. Most of them were accustomed to the sight of the young goddess, but her appearance still affected them - and that particular morning she looked even more extraordinary than usual. Her face was alight and her skin seemed to glow. Several of the young men and centaurs found themselves thinking how spectacular she was, and when her full, sensuous lips tilted up in a brilliant smile, many of the gathered males felt an answering response in their blood - but only briefly -  until they reminded themselves that they could not lust after a goddess come to earth. No matter how tempting she appeared.
When Elphame spoke her voice carried through the group like a firebrand. "From the blossoms on the branches, to the singing birds and the whispering breeze, to the pillars of this castle - we are being welcomed. The very stones of MacCallan Castle greet us with joy. It will no longer be a ruin." Elphame raised her hands over her head and shouted, "Rejoice! It will be our home!" Heat tingled through her arms as it had when she communed with the stone and her body felt deliciously on fire.
The group reacted as one, not so much to her words or to the idea of rebuilding MacCallan Castle, instead they responded to her - their spectacular goddess. With one voice they shouted a cheer that caused the ancient walls before them to echo again with the jubilant sounds of the living.
From his hiding place within the trees Lochlan watched the group. Men and centaurs - young and proud.
He recognized the fire in their blood as they responded to her. And he recognized her, too. How could he not? He had known that he would find her here. Still, the sight of her jolted him. She looked so much more alive than she had in his dreams, and seeing her in person made him realize that he had never really comprehended the depth of her beauty.
Her body! It radiated passion and otherworldly power. He felt a surge of desire deep within his loins. His blood pumped hot and strong, and with his arousal he felt his massive wings quiver and begin to become erect. Quickly he forced himself to look away from her so that he could bring his lust under control.
Pain spiked in his temples and radiated throughout his body, carried by the blood that pulsed hard and
hot within him. His body fought against his desire for control, but, as always, Lochlan pulled from his well of humanity to conquer his darker impulses. The pounding of his blood quieted. His wings shivered once more before refolding neatly against his back.
He ignored the familiar pain that continued to echo, phantomlike through his mind.
Once more in control, he allowed his eyes to return to her. At that instant she raised her arms over her head and the group shouted in response. He smiled, showing long, dangerous-looking canines. She made him want to shout, too. He had been right to come alone; the others could not possibly understand. But thinking of the others sent a tide of despair through him that threatened to engulf him. He could feel them.
He could always feel them - their need, their pain, their belief in him. He shuddered and closed that part of his mind. Not now. He could not think of the others now. Not when everything within him that was honorable and true - everything that was human - wanted to rush to her and tell her that she had filled his dreams and his heart for as long as he could remember.
He took a ragged breath and raked his hand across his face. He couldn't go to her. Not in the open. Not yet. They would only see him as a Fomorian; they would kill him. He could not fight them all for her. No matter how desperately he ached to.
Remember your promise. His conscience whispered through his memory in his beloved mother's voice.
Remember the Prophecy. It is your destiny to find a way to heal your people and to bring them back to Partholon. It is you who must fulfill Epona's Prophecy.
Lochlan couldn't act selfishly. He had to consider the others. He had to end their pain, even if it meant...
Struggling against a crushing sense of loss he wrenched his gaze from her and soundlessly disappeared back into the depths of the forest.