Fallen Fourth Down
Page 57
If I’d been her, if I had come to her house and found Quinn in the hallway, I wouldn’t have handled it like her. I would’ve wanted to hurt him and probably would’ve, regardless of the circumstances. Sam was everything to me. Any guy that tried to threaten that, threaten our relationship, and I saw red. Even thinking about his past antics sent a fierce wave of anger through me. I protected Sam. That was my job, and I had failed last night.
“You thought I was her.”
“I did.” Fuck. “I couldn’t tell how drunk she was, but I know she has feelings for me. It was in the back of my mind that she might’ve tried to sneak in. I’m really sorry, Sam. I really am. Then you came in, and I saw red. I was mad at her for you. If that makes any sense. I was mad that she would dare try to come in when she knows I’m with you, when she knows how much I love you.” I grimaced, remembering how rough I had been as I grabbed her arm and pushed her into the hallway. “Are you okay? I grabbed you too hard last night.”
She nodded. “I’m fine. You didn’t. You were…” Her head hung down. “You were rough because you thought I was her. Thank you.” She looked back up, raw emotion swimming in her eyes. “Jeff never would’ve done that for me, but you do. You always take care of me.”
But I hadn’t. Not last night.
“She didn’t look drunk when she opened the door.” She looked up, searing me with the agony in her eyes. “She looked tired, but not drunk. Drew said you got in an hour before I got there. If she was that wasted, she wouldn’t have sobered up that quick.”
I sighed, sitting on the bed. “I know.”
She shook her head, blinking for a moment, and for that brief moment I couldn’t see the pain she was in. When she opened them again, it was there. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I was a part of that. I had hurt Sam. Gritting my teeth, my hands curled into fists. I hated that. I hated any pain she might endure and knowing I had contributed to it, even if it hadn’t been intentional, gutted me.
She murmured, “Am I supposed to worry about her? Is she going to try something else? Logan said she’s crazy.”
“She was a friend to me when I didn’t like the female gender. I felt like they wanted to use me, use Logan, use my dad. Marissa was a friend that showed me not all girls want to use someone for something. I haven’t wanted to deal with her, with this crush she has on me, because I cared about her.”
Sam frowned.
I held my hand up, seeing she was going to say something. I said softly, “I don’t care about her now. I’m not friends with her. I hate thinking that last night was a set-up, that somehow she worked everything so she was brought here, but I can’t rule out that possibility.”
“Have you talked to her?” She looked back down at her lap. Her hand started to pick at imaginary lint on her pants. She did that when she was nervous or couldn’t deal with the pain inside her.
“No.” I waited a beat. “Do you want me to?” Marissa was nothing to me, but she kept popping up, and she was becoming a problem. I would do what Sam wanted. This wasn’t about me or Marissa’s feelings. This was about what Sam wanted me to do. It was all about how to make her my first priority, remember that she was my first priority. When she didn’t answer, I prodded, “Sam?”
“I don’t know what to say. I hate that she’s here. I trust you, but I don’t trust her.” She cringed and pressed her fingers to her forehead, rubbing at a headache. “She just won’t go away. Why won’t she go away? I don’t know what to think about last night. She came to that lunch, then she’s in your hallway, and you’re apologizing for not dealing with that.”
Hearing the misery in her voice sealed it for me. Marissa was done. Sam would never be exposed to her again, and it was my job to make sure it didn’t happen. If I had to, I would make Marissa hate me. Maybe then she’d stay away.
I knelt in front of her. My hands went to her legs, felt how stiff they were, and I cursed inside. “Hey.”
She gazed down at me. Raw hurt was in there. I helped put it there. I couldn’t talk for a moment, but said, “I’m sorry. I’ll make sure she goes away. I promise.”
The relief was evident. Her head bobbed up and down in a weak nod. A different look came across her features, and she stiffened. Her shoulders lifted, staying there. “I have to tell you something.”
Logan told me about the douchebag. He gave me warning that another guy was sniffing around Sam, but that was it. As soon as Logan said that to me, I knew it was the real reason Sam was here. She hated keeping secrets, so this must’ve been eating away at her. I nodded. “Go ahead.”
“It’s about that guy I told you about, the guy who took my virginity.”
My insides tensed. Even her saying that, made me want to hunt him down and punch him. I didn't know much about the guy she had lost her virginity to, but I wasn’t dumb. I knew she regretted it. A part of me relaxed at the same time, though. The usual condemnation that she had whenever she had spoken about him wasn’t there. I still heard the nervousness, and that made me even more wary.
Trying to sound casual, I murmured, “Yeah?”
“He’s here. I mean, he’s in Fallen Crest.”
Fucker.
Looking back to her lap, she rushed out, “His name is Jackson; he’s Jeff’s cousin. I cheated on Jeff with him, once, a few months before we broke up. I never talked to him after that, but he recently moved to Fallen Crest. His parents are going through a divorce. He’s going to school at FCA. He’s,” her tone softened, more hesitant, “he’s a big football star.”
“Jackson?” What was her ex’s last name?
“Jackson Sallaway.”
The name registered. “He plays tight-end? He was at Cequate High School?” Shit. He was good.
“There’s nothing there.”
I felt her eyes on me, and for once, I was the one not looking at her. Yeah, she was right. There wasn’t anything there because if there had been, that guy would be fucked. I shook my head, cursing to myself. Even if I wanted to kick his ass, I wouldn’t have. Sallaway’s reputation was a good one. He was a decent guy. He didn’t mess with other guys’ girls, and he wasn’t cocky.
I gritted my teeth. “He’s good-looking? His nickname is Pretty.”
“You thought I was her.”
“I did.” Fuck. “I couldn’t tell how drunk she was, but I know she has feelings for me. It was in the back of my mind that she might’ve tried to sneak in. I’m really sorry, Sam. I really am. Then you came in, and I saw red. I was mad at her for you. If that makes any sense. I was mad that she would dare try to come in when she knows I’m with you, when she knows how much I love you.” I grimaced, remembering how rough I had been as I grabbed her arm and pushed her into the hallway. “Are you okay? I grabbed you too hard last night.”
She nodded. “I’m fine. You didn’t. You were…” Her head hung down. “You were rough because you thought I was her. Thank you.” She looked back up, raw emotion swimming in her eyes. “Jeff never would’ve done that for me, but you do. You always take care of me.”
But I hadn’t. Not last night.
“She didn’t look drunk when she opened the door.” She looked up, searing me with the agony in her eyes. “She looked tired, but not drunk. Drew said you got in an hour before I got there. If she was that wasted, she wouldn’t have sobered up that quick.”
I sighed, sitting on the bed. “I know.”
She shook her head, blinking for a moment, and for that brief moment I couldn’t see the pain she was in. When she opened them again, it was there. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I was a part of that. I had hurt Sam. Gritting my teeth, my hands curled into fists. I hated that. I hated any pain she might endure and knowing I had contributed to it, even if it hadn’t been intentional, gutted me.
She murmured, “Am I supposed to worry about her? Is she going to try something else? Logan said she’s crazy.”
“She was a friend to me when I didn’t like the female gender. I felt like they wanted to use me, use Logan, use my dad. Marissa was a friend that showed me not all girls want to use someone for something. I haven’t wanted to deal with her, with this crush she has on me, because I cared about her.”
Sam frowned.
I held my hand up, seeing she was going to say something. I said softly, “I don’t care about her now. I’m not friends with her. I hate thinking that last night was a set-up, that somehow she worked everything so she was brought here, but I can’t rule out that possibility.”
“Have you talked to her?” She looked back down at her lap. Her hand started to pick at imaginary lint on her pants. She did that when she was nervous or couldn’t deal with the pain inside her.
“No.” I waited a beat. “Do you want me to?” Marissa was nothing to me, but she kept popping up, and she was becoming a problem. I would do what Sam wanted. This wasn’t about me or Marissa’s feelings. This was about what Sam wanted me to do. It was all about how to make her my first priority, remember that she was my first priority. When she didn’t answer, I prodded, “Sam?”
“I don’t know what to say. I hate that she’s here. I trust you, but I don’t trust her.” She cringed and pressed her fingers to her forehead, rubbing at a headache. “She just won’t go away. Why won’t she go away? I don’t know what to think about last night. She came to that lunch, then she’s in your hallway, and you’re apologizing for not dealing with that.”
Hearing the misery in her voice sealed it for me. Marissa was done. Sam would never be exposed to her again, and it was my job to make sure it didn’t happen. If I had to, I would make Marissa hate me. Maybe then she’d stay away.
I knelt in front of her. My hands went to her legs, felt how stiff they were, and I cursed inside. “Hey.”
She gazed down at me. Raw hurt was in there. I helped put it there. I couldn’t talk for a moment, but said, “I’m sorry. I’ll make sure she goes away. I promise.”
The relief was evident. Her head bobbed up and down in a weak nod. A different look came across her features, and she stiffened. Her shoulders lifted, staying there. “I have to tell you something.”
Logan told me about the douchebag. He gave me warning that another guy was sniffing around Sam, but that was it. As soon as Logan said that to me, I knew it was the real reason Sam was here. She hated keeping secrets, so this must’ve been eating away at her. I nodded. “Go ahead.”
“It’s about that guy I told you about, the guy who took my virginity.”
My insides tensed. Even her saying that, made me want to hunt him down and punch him. I didn't know much about the guy she had lost her virginity to, but I wasn’t dumb. I knew she regretted it. A part of me relaxed at the same time, though. The usual condemnation that she had whenever she had spoken about him wasn’t there. I still heard the nervousness, and that made me even more wary.
Trying to sound casual, I murmured, “Yeah?”
“He’s here. I mean, he’s in Fallen Crest.”
Fucker.
Looking back to her lap, she rushed out, “His name is Jackson; he’s Jeff’s cousin. I cheated on Jeff with him, once, a few months before we broke up. I never talked to him after that, but he recently moved to Fallen Crest. His parents are going through a divorce. He’s going to school at FCA. He’s,” her tone softened, more hesitant, “he’s a big football star.”
“Jackson?” What was her ex’s last name?
“Jackson Sallaway.”
The name registered. “He plays tight-end? He was at Cequate High School?” Shit. He was good.
“There’s nothing there.”
I felt her eyes on me, and for once, I was the one not looking at her. Yeah, she was right. There wasn’t anything there because if there had been, that guy would be fucked. I shook my head, cursing to myself. Even if I wanted to kick his ass, I wouldn’t have. Sallaway’s reputation was a good one. He was a decent guy. He didn’t mess with other guys’ girls, and he wasn’t cocky.
I gritted my teeth. “He’s good-looking? His nickname is Pretty.”
