Fallen Fourth Down
Page 71
“She’s not,” Kris added. “Not anymore.”
“Not my neighbor?”
Kris rolled her eyes. “Not my friend. She’s my enemy.”
“Oh.” A cloud of confusion settled over Tate, but she just shrugged and looked back at Logan. “Whether or not it’s true, you need to know that I told Sam last summer. It was my last goodbye present.”
Logan seared her with a dark look.
She stopped, her chin trembled a little, but she swallowed. Her head lifted again, and she smoothed out her shirt. “I went to Manny’s to say goodbye to Heather. Sam was there and I couldn’t keep the truth to myself any longer.”
“Truth.” Logan snorted. He raked a hand through his hair. “You don’t have any idea what the truth is. You wanted to mess with us. That’s the truth. Stop lying to yourself, Tate.” He cursed. “And I thought you changed last year. All this bullshit about making amends, turning over a new leaf, trying to make things right.”
“I was,” she shot back. “I fucked up. I wanted to try with you again. You’re the best guy I had and lost. That’s on me, but let’s be real here. I’m not a saint. I mean, come on. I had no shot. You should’ve been honest with me right away.”
“What?”
“You strung me along. Used me for sex—”
“Stop, Tate.” His voice dropped back down. He was keeping himself calm, but the level of hate in his eyes gave me an indication of his true feelings. “I never lied to you. I never said we’d date. I told you we wouldn’t. You still came onto me, and it wasn’t one time. I told you over and over again, but you kept coming. You’re the one who called me. I never called you first.”
“Stop it.”
He laughed. “The tides have turned. You keep throwing out the truth. I’m going to throw out the real truth. Now you want me to shut up?” He waved at our audience, who still hadn’t moved. “The truth, Tate, is that none of these people give a shit about you. They’re up here to watch some shit storm go down in front of them. They’re eating popcorn, enjoying this show.” He jabbed his hand in the air, his finger pointing at her. “You gave this to them. You. Not me. Not Sam. Or Kris. You did, coming in here and acting like you’re too good to be in the gutter.”
“Logan,” she whispered. Her head hung down.
He jerked forward a step, stopped himself, and looked back at me. I was burned by his look. He was still furious, no. He was enraged. Another shit storm was coming our way. Logan was holding it in. That was going to be between him and me.
He shook his head, still looking at me, but moved back around to focus on Tate. “The truth is that you’re still in there. You’re not out. You never left the gutter. You’re the same girl who came onto my brother when the guy who loved her was next door. Mason wanted to throw you out of the house naked that night. I wish he had. I wish our dad hadn’t stopped him.”
She’d been crumbling, but it switched. The fight came back to her and she reared back, her eyes seething. “Okay, here’s the real truth. I hate that bitch behind you.” She stabbed in the air, pointing at me. “But I hate your brother even more because he didn’t need to hurt me the way he did.”
“Mason hurt you because you hurt me. Don’t you get that?”
She kept going, as if he hadn’t talked, “And I hate you because I still love you and I’ll never have you. There’s the real ugly truth, right there for you. But everything else, I have changed. I did make things right with Marissa. I meant that when I said it. I’m her friend. I have been for years and I wanted to come back and see if I could get my other friend back, but because of her,” everyone knew she meant me, “there’s no hope in that. Heather acts like I’m dirt underneath her feet.”
“You brought that on yourself. No one else did this. Stop fucking with my family.” Logan turned to Kris. His voice softened, “I’m sorry you heard this. I’m sorry that you’ve been hurt by her too.” He gestured to Tate. “And I think we need to have a conversation after this, alone.”
She nodded. As he was apologizing, fresh tears slipped down her cheeks and she brushed them away. Then she left and went outside.
Logan looked at the crowd. “Show’s over. Get lost.”
Everyone dispersed. Some ran into each other, but Logan wasn’t one to be ignored when he spoke like that. Logan Fucking Kade was back. He stood there, shaking his head from side to side. I couldn’t move. I didn’t know if I dared. My eyes met Tate’s. She was feeling the same way.
He motioned to her. “Get your pizza, or whatever the hell you came here for, and get out of my fucking life.”
She sneered at us for a moment and left too.
There was an eerie silence over the customers, and Logan shook his head. A soft curse slipped from him as a manager came out from behind the counter. He started to lift his arm, but Logan shook his head. “No need. I’m leaving.”
The manager looked from Logan to me.
“Sam,” Logan said.
I jumped. The softness in his tone, the raw feeling that I heard from him, sent me into a full blown panic attack. My heart started racing. My chest grew tight. The storm that had been rolling over and over inside me during the confrontation had doubled.
I had hurt him.
He asked, “She told you last summer?”
I had lied to him. I forced myself to nod. “After graduation.” That was seven months ago. I flinched as I realized how long I had kept this secret.
He turned and started for the door.
I went after him. Once we were outside, I paused on the sidewalk. “Logan?”
He was going to his Escalade, but he stopped. He didn’t turn around, not right away. As I waited, my heart pounded against my chest, straining to get out. His head lifted, his shoulders dropped down, and his hands balled into fists. He turned slowly. The bleak look that had been in Kris’ eyes was in his, but it was more intense.
That’s when the fear came in. I could lose him. I could lose Mason. My nightmare was happening, right in front of me.
A ball was in my throat. I could barely talk around it. “I was scared.”
He cocked his head to the side. “You better tell Mason.” He started to turn back around, but stopped halfway. With his head down, he said softly, “Before I do.”
“Not my neighbor?”
Kris rolled her eyes. “Not my friend. She’s my enemy.”
“Oh.” A cloud of confusion settled over Tate, but she just shrugged and looked back at Logan. “Whether or not it’s true, you need to know that I told Sam last summer. It was my last goodbye present.”
Logan seared her with a dark look.
She stopped, her chin trembled a little, but she swallowed. Her head lifted again, and she smoothed out her shirt. “I went to Manny’s to say goodbye to Heather. Sam was there and I couldn’t keep the truth to myself any longer.”
“Truth.” Logan snorted. He raked a hand through his hair. “You don’t have any idea what the truth is. You wanted to mess with us. That’s the truth. Stop lying to yourself, Tate.” He cursed. “And I thought you changed last year. All this bullshit about making amends, turning over a new leaf, trying to make things right.”
“I was,” she shot back. “I fucked up. I wanted to try with you again. You’re the best guy I had and lost. That’s on me, but let’s be real here. I’m not a saint. I mean, come on. I had no shot. You should’ve been honest with me right away.”
“What?”
“You strung me along. Used me for sex—”
“Stop, Tate.” His voice dropped back down. He was keeping himself calm, but the level of hate in his eyes gave me an indication of his true feelings. “I never lied to you. I never said we’d date. I told you we wouldn’t. You still came onto me, and it wasn’t one time. I told you over and over again, but you kept coming. You’re the one who called me. I never called you first.”
“Stop it.”
He laughed. “The tides have turned. You keep throwing out the truth. I’m going to throw out the real truth. Now you want me to shut up?” He waved at our audience, who still hadn’t moved. “The truth, Tate, is that none of these people give a shit about you. They’re up here to watch some shit storm go down in front of them. They’re eating popcorn, enjoying this show.” He jabbed his hand in the air, his finger pointing at her. “You gave this to them. You. Not me. Not Sam. Or Kris. You did, coming in here and acting like you’re too good to be in the gutter.”
“Logan,” she whispered. Her head hung down.
He jerked forward a step, stopped himself, and looked back at me. I was burned by his look. He was still furious, no. He was enraged. Another shit storm was coming our way. Logan was holding it in. That was going to be between him and me.
He shook his head, still looking at me, but moved back around to focus on Tate. “The truth is that you’re still in there. You’re not out. You never left the gutter. You’re the same girl who came onto my brother when the guy who loved her was next door. Mason wanted to throw you out of the house naked that night. I wish he had. I wish our dad hadn’t stopped him.”
She’d been crumbling, but it switched. The fight came back to her and she reared back, her eyes seething. “Okay, here’s the real truth. I hate that bitch behind you.” She stabbed in the air, pointing at me. “But I hate your brother even more because he didn’t need to hurt me the way he did.”
“Mason hurt you because you hurt me. Don’t you get that?”
She kept going, as if he hadn’t talked, “And I hate you because I still love you and I’ll never have you. There’s the real ugly truth, right there for you. But everything else, I have changed. I did make things right with Marissa. I meant that when I said it. I’m her friend. I have been for years and I wanted to come back and see if I could get my other friend back, but because of her,” everyone knew she meant me, “there’s no hope in that. Heather acts like I’m dirt underneath her feet.”
“You brought that on yourself. No one else did this. Stop fucking with my family.” Logan turned to Kris. His voice softened, “I’m sorry you heard this. I’m sorry that you’ve been hurt by her too.” He gestured to Tate. “And I think we need to have a conversation after this, alone.”
She nodded. As he was apologizing, fresh tears slipped down her cheeks and she brushed them away. Then she left and went outside.
Logan looked at the crowd. “Show’s over. Get lost.”
Everyone dispersed. Some ran into each other, but Logan wasn’t one to be ignored when he spoke like that. Logan Fucking Kade was back. He stood there, shaking his head from side to side. I couldn’t move. I didn’t know if I dared. My eyes met Tate’s. She was feeling the same way.
He motioned to her. “Get your pizza, or whatever the hell you came here for, and get out of my fucking life.”
She sneered at us for a moment and left too.
There was an eerie silence over the customers, and Logan shook his head. A soft curse slipped from him as a manager came out from behind the counter. He started to lift his arm, but Logan shook his head. “No need. I’m leaving.”
The manager looked from Logan to me.
“Sam,” Logan said.
I jumped. The softness in his tone, the raw feeling that I heard from him, sent me into a full blown panic attack. My heart started racing. My chest grew tight. The storm that had been rolling over and over inside me during the confrontation had doubled.
I had hurt him.
He asked, “She told you last summer?”
I had lied to him. I forced myself to nod. “After graduation.” That was seven months ago. I flinched as I realized how long I had kept this secret.
He turned and started for the door.
I went after him. Once we were outside, I paused on the sidewalk. “Logan?”
He was going to his Escalade, but he stopped. He didn’t turn around, not right away. As I waited, my heart pounded against my chest, straining to get out. His head lifted, his shoulders dropped down, and his hands balled into fists. He turned slowly. The bleak look that had been in Kris’ eyes was in his, but it was more intense.
That’s when the fear came in. I could lose him. I could lose Mason. My nightmare was happening, right in front of me.
A ball was in my throat. I could barely talk around it. “I was scared.”
He cocked his head to the side. “You better tell Mason.” He started to turn back around, but stopped halfway. With his head down, he said softly, “Before I do.”
