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Fear Me

Page 45

   


“I have every intention of doing this. I have since the first time you looked at me with the same need that I felt every damn day.”
“What are you talking about? I never –”
“I read your journal,” he interrupted with a smirk. My heart stopped in chest. Or was it beating so loud that I couldn’t hear it anymore?
He read my journal.
That meant he knew every single emotion or thought I ever felt or had about him. That also meant he knew about my parents.
“Have you ever thought about being a writer? You’re very…descriptive. I particularly liked the entries dated, August 17th and May 27th. Those dates mean anything to you?” he grinned at me but the smile didn’t reach his eyes.
I dropped my head, knowing exactly what dates he was referring to. The day I realized I desired him and the day before he was arrested. They were both during the same school year.
“You’re a monster.”
“And you’re a liar.” He began removing his belt from his jeans. It was the same one from last night. My wrists still held the imprint of the skulls and were red and puffy.
“I didn’t lie.”
“Come here.”
“No.”
He sighed as if I were little more than a nuisance and then he was suddenly on the bed, dragging me to the edge of the bed and pulling me up. “Suit yourself,” he whispered against my lips.
“Don’t –” He gripped my waist tighter in warning.
My top was quickly unbuttoned and tossed away.  The cold air hit my bare chest, hardening my nipples just before his head lowered and his mouth was on me, sucking. My back instinctively arched from the sensation, pressing my breasts into his mouth further. A sharp sting from his bite had me gasping and grabbing onto his head for balance as I felt my whole world shift from that little spice of pain.
The next moment, I was on my back and his hands at my shorts, pulling them off my hips and down my legs until they disappeared over the bed. The dark look of determination on his face scared me even as my body prepared to take him. I couldn’t deny or hide the evidence of my arousal. I didn’t understand all that what was happening or what was wrong with me. I tried reminding myself of all the horrible things he’d done and planned to do, but none of it worked.
When he reached for my panties, I finally got ahold of my senses, and grabbed onto his hands to stop him, but he took those away from me too and I was left bare and shaking on my bed. I should be screaming and yelling and cursing, but I wasn’t. Instead I watched him devour my body with his eyes and I could see a hint of approval in them.
He pulled me up again and ordered me to finish undressing him. I reached for his jeans with nervous hands and unbuttoned him and slid the zipper down. I grabbed onto the waist of his jeans with both hands and slid them down his legs all the while keeping my eyes on his, letting him see my disdain and praying I was shielding my hunger.
“You can keep fighting it, Monroe, but my dick will be deep inside you before the night is over. We have all night. There is no one here to save you. No one to hear you scream. No one to see you come.” A slow, steady throb began between my legs from his threat.  “Lay down and spread your legs for me.”
I scooted back toward the headboard and slowly lowered my back to the mattress. I stared up at the ceiling while I spread my legs for him. I knew he could see my arousal.
“Look at me,” he demanded. I let my gaze travel to his face and saw the anger there. “Don’t hide from me,” he growled.
“You should be used to it by now. I’ve hidden from you my entire life.”
The deep hatred that flashed in his eyes, more than I’ve ever seen before, was my only warning. He covered my body with his and forced my thighs open wider to accommodate him. I could feel the head of his cock poised at my entrance as he grabbed a hand full of my hair in his hand and leaned down to place his lips at my ear.
“I’m going to fuck you now and when you’ve had more than you can take, I’m going to do it all over again, and I won’t let up, no matter how much you beg me to.”
I looked into his eyes and couldn’t see any hint of remorse, only angry lust. The past ten years rushed back to me all at once and it felt like a punch to the gut. How could I ever think to desire him? He threatened my aunt; he tried to take away Willow. I hated him.
“When this is all over –” My voice caught in my throat as he began entering me. I already felt so full. “and you realize the mistake your making, it will be me who makes you beg, and I won’t stop until I bring you to your fucking knees.”
He stopped and stared back at me, his eyes searching mine, before he finally spoke, his voice chilling. “Thank you, Monroe. You almost made this hard for me.”
It felt as if the loud cry I releases came straight from my soul when he slammed into me. Shock and pain, took over my body as he took my virginity. I clutched his shoulders and tried to push him away but he seized my wrists in his fists and locked them against the mattress.
“Fuck,” he groaned. Thankfully, he didn’t move. His body was still on top of mine as we watched me closely.
I shook my head, feverishly. “I can’t –”
“You can and you will. Take me, baby.”
He continued to bury himself deeper and deeper inside me while staring into my eyes and I knew he wanted me to feel his possession and I did. I felt him everywhere. When he began a slow, steady thrust into my body it sent my senses shooting off into space. Pain began to fade and pleasure took over.