Fear Me
Page 77
“He totally hustled you, Lake.”
“What do you mean? It was a fair game.”
“Come on. You saw Keiran play. He used your curiosity and made the odds sound good enough that you couldn’t resist.”
“You got played,” Willow added.
“And if I know Keiran, he is after more than friendship.”
“I know. He made it pretty clear he wants sex.”
“Are you sure you know what giving it up to Keiran will lead to?” Sheldon asked.
“An orgasm?” I laughed.
“Lake, Keiran is playing for keeps.”
“He has had to fuck almost every girl at Bainbridge and then some. Does he keep all of them?”
“Of course not. And he isn’t as big of a man whore as you may think. He’s too calculating. Most of what he does has a purpose.”
“Like his sudden interest in me?”
“Have you been listening? It’s always been there.”
I didn’t understand why everyone was so convinced that Keiran has always wanted me. He has done everything in his power to convince everyone that I was an undesirable waste of space. I’ve never once been on a date because of him. I didn’t go to parties. I didn’t hang out. Up until now I had one friend. No matter how much I hid in the past, he found me. I ran and he chased. I couldn’t escape him. It was as if my pain fueled him.
This year was supposed to be about getting through and breaking away with the hope that I would never see him again. Now I was being told that the past was a lie. It felt very real to me because I still carried the scars. After his last play on my sanity, the scars ran deeper than ever before.
I guess I still haven’t gotten away from wearing my emotions on my face because Sheldon quickly changed the subject. “Willow what are you doing to my brother? He’s been snapping and growling at everyone. My dad put him in a chokehold when he snapped at mom. It was awesome.”
“I took your advice. I showed him I was serious.”
“I never doubted you were serious. I’m wondering though if you’re sure.”
“What do you mean?”
“You want him, so what’s the deal?”
“He’s engaged?”
“Oh that.” She shrugged and answered, “He’s not engaged.”
“Sheldon, don’t lie for him.”
“He’s not. There was talk between our fathers about Rosalyn and Dash marrying, but that was more like matchmaker bullshit. At least for my dad it was. He called the idea off when Dash told him he wasn’t interested. Rosalyn’s dad, however, has it in his head that they made an agreement. We all know he’s just after money. His finances are failing and our family is richer, so they want to marry into the family. “
“Are you talking about an arranged marriage? Who does that?” I interrupted. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.
“Our families are old money so they follow a lot of old traditions and customs. My dad is more realistic and believes in marrying for love. Besides he would never make us do what we wouldn’t want to; to a point anyway.”
“What point is that?” Willow asked.
“Dash and dad got into an argument Sunday night about what school Dash would attend. He wants Dash at a more promising school so he can take over the family business.”
“Dash doesn’t want to take over?”
“He wants to. He just wants to do it his own way. Anyway the argument escalated and he disappeared for a few hours.”
“He came here Sunday night around nine but he was only here for a few minutes. I asked him about Rosalyn and he took off.” Willow repeated the conversation to Sheldon who wasn’t surprised.
“He didn’t mean it, Willow. He was already pissed and looking for someone to take it out on. Dash is crazy about you. He told me there was no one like you.”
“Great. I’m his favorite toy. I’m honored.”
Sheldon shook her head, exasperated. “You two are going to get caught in the worst way. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Dash may be mad now but he isn’t letting you go and Keiran won’t let you run, Lake.”
“How are you so sure?” I asked.
“Because you let them in.”
Chapter Twenty
Rumors were spreading hard and fast. To everyone at school, I was Keiran’s girlfriend and we were the topic of everyone’s conversation. What really threw me for a loop was the birdie, by the name of Angela, who said that Keiran started the rumor.
Willow had stopped her in the hallway one day to ask about where it came from. Angela’s exact words were “How could it be a rumor if it came straight from the horse’s mouth?” I knew then that it had to be Keiran because I didn’t say that shit.
When I confronted Keiran, he’d only shrugged and say, “You’re mine. Now they know it.”
To make matters worse, Anya was doing everything in her power to tarnish my reputation, which was really a pathetic attempt after being bullied by Keiran for years. I was immune to anyone else.
Basketball season was coming, so I haven’t seen much of Keiran outside of school. He still used every opportunity to feel me up and violate me in school though. I was becoming pretty familiar with inappropriate places to do inappropriate acts.
Keiran’s possessiveness wasn’t the only contributor to my growing frustration. Time was ticking. My aunt was due back in a few weeks and I wasn’t any closer to finding answers about the girl in the picture. A few times I came close to just asking Keiran about it but knew that would be dangerous and stupid. We may be “friends” now but he could quickly become my enemy again if I wasn’t careful.
“What do you mean? It was a fair game.”
“Come on. You saw Keiran play. He used your curiosity and made the odds sound good enough that you couldn’t resist.”
“You got played,” Willow added.
“And if I know Keiran, he is after more than friendship.”
“I know. He made it pretty clear he wants sex.”
“Are you sure you know what giving it up to Keiran will lead to?” Sheldon asked.
“An orgasm?” I laughed.
“Lake, Keiran is playing for keeps.”
“He has had to fuck almost every girl at Bainbridge and then some. Does he keep all of them?”
“Of course not. And he isn’t as big of a man whore as you may think. He’s too calculating. Most of what he does has a purpose.”
“Like his sudden interest in me?”
“Have you been listening? It’s always been there.”
I didn’t understand why everyone was so convinced that Keiran has always wanted me. He has done everything in his power to convince everyone that I was an undesirable waste of space. I’ve never once been on a date because of him. I didn’t go to parties. I didn’t hang out. Up until now I had one friend. No matter how much I hid in the past, he found me. I ran and he chased. I couldn’t escape him. It was as if my pain fueled him.
This year was supposed to be about getting through and breaking away with the hope that I would never see him again. Now I was being told that the past was a lie. It felt very real to me because I still carried the scars. After his last play on my sanity, the scars ran deeper than ever before.
I guess I still haven’t gotten away from wearing my emotions on my face because Sheldon quickly changed the subject. “Willow what are you doing to my brother? He’s been snapping and growling at everyone. My dad put him in a chokehold when he snapped at mom. It was awesome.”
“I took your advice. I showed him I was serious.”
“I never doubted you were serious. I’m wondering though if you’re sure.”
“What do you mean?”
“You want him, so what’s the deal?”
“He’s engaged?”
“Oh that.” She shrugged and answered, “He’s not engaged.”
“Sheldon, don’t lie for him.”
“He’s not. There was talk between our fathers about Rosalyn and Dash marrying, but that was more like matchmaker bullshit. At least for my dad it was. He called the idea off when Dash told him he wasn’t interested. Rosalyn’s dad, however, has it in his head that they made an agreement. We all know he’s just after money. His finances are failing and our family is richer, so they want to marry into the family. “
“Are you talking about an arranged marriage? Who does that?” I interrupted. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.
“Our families are old money so they follow a lot of old traditions and customs. My dad is more realistic and believes in marrying for love. Besides he would never make us do what we wouldn’t want to; to a point anyway.”
“What point is that?” Willow asked.
“Dash and dad got into an argument Sunday night about what school Dash would attend. He wants Dash at a more promising school so he can take over the family business.”
“Dash doesn’t want to take over?”
“He wants to. He just wants to do it his own way. Anyway the argument escalated and he disappeared for a few hours.”
“He came here Sunday night around nine but he was only here for a few minutes. I asked him about Rosalyn and he took off.” Willow repeated the conversation to Sheldon who wasn’t surprised.
“He didn’t mean it, Willow. He was already pissed and looking for someone to take it out on. Dash is crazy about you. He told me there was no one like you.”
“Great. I’m his favorite toy. I’m honored.”
Sheldon shook her head, exasperated. “You two are going to get caught in the worst way. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Dash may be mad now but he isn’t letting you go and Keiran won’t let you run, Lake.”
“How are you so sure?” I asked.
“Because you let them in.”
Chapter Twenty
Rumors were spreading hard and fast. To everyone at school, I was Keiran’s girlfriend and we were the topic of everyone’s conversation. What really threw me for a loop was the birdie, by the name of Angela, who said that Keiran started the rumor.
Willow had stopped her in the hallway one day to ask about where it came from. Angela’s exact words were “How could it be a rumor if it came straight from the horse’s mouth?” I knew then that it had to be Keiran because I didn’t say that shit.
When I confronted Keiran, he’d only shrugged and say, “You’re mine. Now they know it.”
To make matters worse, Anya was doing everything in her power to tarnish my reputation, which was really a pathetic attempt after being bullied by Keiran for years. I was immune to anyone else.
Basketball season was coming, so I haven’t seen much of Keiran outside of school. He still used every opportunity to feel me up and violate me in school though. I was becoming pretty familiar with inappropriate places to do inappropriate acts.
Keiran’s possessiveness wasn’t the only contributor to my growing frustration. Time was ticking. My aunt was due back in a few weeks and I wasn’t any closer to finding answers about the girl in the picture. A few times I came close to just asking Keiran about it but knew that would be dangerous and stupid. We may be “friends” now but he could quickly become my enemy again if I wasn’t careful.
