Fear Me
Page 81
“Because you wanted to use it against me,” he said all to calmly. It immediately made me wary. Where was the shouting? Where was the anger?
“You’re being ridiculous.” I sat up and pulled the covers around my naked body, no longer feeling as comfortable being in the nude. I felt vulnerable enough with his threatening stare bearing down on me.
“Am I?” he asked.
“How would I even know the picture involved you?” Keeping his eyes locked with mine, he shoved his fist in his pocket and pulled it back out immediately. I thought it was odd that he did that until he opened his fist and let the gold locket dangle between his fingers.
“This look familiar?”
“It’s starting to,” I said petulantly. I knew I was caught and truth be told, I was scared but I wouldn’t let him see it.
“How about if I wrap this around your neck and strangle the fuck out of you?”
I jumped from the bed, forgetting about my naked state and the words were spewing out of my mouth before I even knew what I was going to say.
“Go ahead and do it! You’ve been threatening to kill me since we were kids! Sometimes I wish you would have just put me out of the misery you caused me!” My chest was heaving up and down while he watched on silently. “Yes, I was going to find out the story behind that picture, the story behind you, and the story behind the past ten damn years and I was going to use it to make you pay for what you’ve done to me.”
His eyes narrowed and his voice filled with venom as he asked, “What I’ve done to you?”
“I never did anything to you. I didn’t deserve your hatred.”
“That may be so,” he said nonchalantly and shrugged, “but that doesn’t mean you didn’t affect me because you did.”
“Affect you how?”
“You made me realize how fucked up I was or...am.”
“Why is that a reason to hate me? I was seven, Keiran. I didn’t even know you!”
“It didn’t matter. I blamed you for making me realize that so hurting you became a way for me to accept who I was. Ten years ago I was serious when I said I was going to kill you but then hurting you became an addiction and I couldn’t stop.”
“If it was fear that you wanted, why only target me? There are so many people who are afraid of you.”
“None like you.”
“Keiran, you’re sick.” Instead of anger, I was filled with pity and empathy for him. It couldn’t be easy being that type of person.
“I’m not sick, Lake. I was just doing all that I’ve ever known.” I still couldn’t imagine what could turn an innocent child into someone so dark.
“J – Jesse found these articles today. I know your mother abandoned you when you were eight.”
“How did he find that? It’s supposed to be gone – all of it.”
“He’s good at finding things.”
“I see.”
“So help me see. What happened to you?”
“What did the article say?” I frowned at his question. He didn’t look angry or sad about me finding out his history. Instead he looked curious.
“Not much. It said that John took you in and that Mitch Masters is your father. It said nothing about your mother. Who is she?”
“My mother was a prostitute and a drug addict. She left me with my uncle so she could go off and die.” He tried to mask it but I heard the contempt in his voice when he spoke about his mother but his still held no emotion.
“What about the girl in the photo?” His eyes clouded over as he looked back down at the picture.
“She’s no one,” he replied. I could hear the bitterness in his voice. “She was weak.” The contempt in his voice spurred my next question.
“So what happened to her?” He had to know something considering he had he locket. Could he have been there when she died?
“I killed her.” As much as I was hoping for honesty I didn’t actually expect him to be so honest. He just admitted to murdering someone yet he was so casual about it.
“Why?” I asked reluctantly. My voice shook but I managed to hide most of it.
“Because I couldn’t save her.” His eyes had glossed over with some unnamed emotion when he spoke. It was a look I’d never seen on Keiran’s face before. It was regret.
“Save her from what?” His beeping phone interrupted whatever he would or wouldn’t have said. When he spit out a harsh curse and his face transformed into a savage mask my attention shifted to whatever held his attention now.
“What is it?” I couldn’t help asking.
“Reynolds made bail.”
“When?”
“Yesterday.”
Chapter Twenty-One
The sunlight on my skin woke me up and I swear I could hear the birds chirping outside and I felt like singing. I’m such a dork. I stretched and my body felt sore in all the right places and remembering how it got like brought a smile to face.
“Good morning, baby.”
I was surprised to hear his voice even though I knew he stayed the night. After we found out that Trevor was out – probably thanks to his dad – I’d wordlessly gotten back in bed and closed my eyes, wishing for sleep to come quickly. I told myself I didn’t care what Keiran did or where he went, but when he climbed into bed and spooned me from behind, my heart did jumping jacks all over my chest.
I finally opened my eyes and found him sitting on the floor next to the bed. His knees were bent with his arms draped across them. He wore an intense expression on his face and I wondered what he’d been thinking.
“You’re being ridiculous.” I sat up and pulled the covers around my naked body, no longer feeling as comfortable being in the nude. I felt vulnerable enough with his threatening stare bearing down on me.
“Am I?” he asked.
“How would I even know the picture involved you?” Keeping his eyes locked with mine, he shoved his fist in his pocket and pulled it back out immediately. I thought it was odd that he did that until he opened his fist and let the gold locket dangle between his fingers.
“This look familiar?”
“It’s starting to,” I said petulantly. I knew I was caught and truth be told, I was scared but I wouldn’t let him see it.
“How about if I wrap this around your neck and strangle the fuck out of you?”
I jumped from the bed, forgetting about my naked state and the words were spewing out of my mouth before I even knew what I was going to say.
“Go ahead and do it! You’ve been threatening to kill me since we were kids! Sometimes I wish you would have just put me out of the misery you caused me!” My chest was heaving up and down while he watched on silently. “Yes, I was going to find out the story behind that picture, the story behind you, and the story behind the past ten damn years and I was going to use it to make you pay for what you’ve done to me.”
His eyes narrowed and his voice filled with venom as he asked, “What I’ve done to you?”
“I never did anything to you. I didn’t deserve your hatred.”
“That may be so,” he said nonchalantly and shrugged, “but that doesn’t mean you didn’t affect me because you did.”
“Affect you how?”
“You made me realize how fucked up I was or...am.”
“Why is that a reason to hate me? I was seven, Keiran. I didn’t even know you!”
“It didn’t matter. I blamed you for making me realize that so hurting you became a way for me to accept who I was. Ten years ago I was serious when I said I was going to kill you but then hurting you became an addiction and I couldn’t stop.”
“If it was fear that you wanted, why only target me? There are so many people who are afraid of you.”
“None like you.”
“Keiran, you’re sick.” Instead of anger, I was filled with pity and empathy for him. It couldn’t be easy being that type of person.
“I’m not sick, Lake. I was just doing all that I’ve ever known.” I still couldn’t imagine what could turn an innocent child into someone so dark.
“J – Jesse found these articles today. I know your mother abandoned you when you were eight.”
“How did he find that? It’s supposed to be gone – all of it.”
“He’s good at finding things.”
“I see.”
“So help me see. What happened to you?”
“What did the article say?” I frowned at his question. He didn’t look angry or sad about me finding out his history. Instead he looked curious.
“Not much. It said that John took you in and that Mitch Masters is your father. It said nothing about your mother. Who is she?”
“My mother was a prostitute and a drug addict. She left me with my uncle so she could go off and die.” He tried to mask it but I heard the contempt in his voice when he spoke about his mother but his still held no emotion.
“What about the girl in the photo?” His eyes clouded over as he looked back down at the picture.
“She’s no one,” he replied. I could hear the bitterness in his voice. “She was weak.” The contempt in his voice spurred my next question.
“So what happened to her?” He had to know something considering he had he locket. Could he have been there when she died?
“I killed her.” As much as I was hoping for honesty I didn’t actually expect him to be so honest. He just admitted to murdering someone yet he was so casual about it.
“Why?” I asked reluctantly. My voice shook but I managed to hide most of it.
“Because I couldn’t save her.” His eyes had glossed over with some unnamed emotion when he spoke. It was a look I’d never seen on Keiran’s face before. It was regret.
“Save her from what?” His beeping phone interrupted whatever he would or wouldn’t have said. When he spit out a harsh curse and his face transformed into a savage mask my attention shifted to whatever held his attention now.
“What is it?” I couldn’t help asking.
“Reynolds made bail.”
“When?”
“Yesterday.”
Chapter Twenty-One
The sunlight on my skin woke me up and I swear I could hear the birds chirping outside and I felt like singing. I’m such a dork. I stretched and my body felt sore in all the right places and remembering how it got like brought a smile to face.
“Good morning, baby.”
I was surprised to hear his voice even though I knew he stayed the night. After we found out that Trevor was out – probably thanks to his dad – I’d wordlessly gotten back in bed and closed my eyes, wishing for sleep to come quickly. I told myself I didn’t care what Keiran did or where he went, but when he climbed into bed and spooned me from behind, my heart did jumping jacks all over my chest.
I finally opened my eyes and found him sitting on the floor next to the bed. His knees were bent with his arms draped across them. He wore an intense expression on his face and I wondered what he’d been thinking.
