Fear Us
Page 41
I couldn’t see him, but I knew he was here.
When I finally opened my eyes, my gaze first landed on an old poster of Megan Fox posing in a superwoman costume. I remember the day we hung it up after fighting over who would get to keep her. He assumed at first that she was an inspiration for how I wanted to look. I revealed that I had an even bigger crush on her that I couldn’t and wouldn’t explain. It was also the first time he told me that he loved me.
At first, I laughed it off until I witnessed what had to be the first sincere moment we shared in the brief months we dated.
It just so happened shortly after the bliss of falling in love was followed by two years of heartbreak because of his cheating.
Before that summer day in his bedroom, he had been someone I could trust, but something shattered that. It wasn’t until it was too late when I realized we had been doomed from the start.
“I thought about tearing it down.”
Keenan’s deep voice pulled me from the past. It was a constant battle not to live in the past, but it was an all-out war not to be afraid of the present.
“So why haven’t you?” The raspy sound of my voice was a testament to the pain I had endured however long since I’d been passed out. I could still hear my screams from when the nearly scalding water poured onto my skin.
“Because there is no such thing as destroying a memory. It’s impossible.”
“It’s not impossible. I managed to forget about you all these years.”
“And yet here I am… Besides, we both know that’s a lie.” The bite in his tone was barely audible, but the resentment was there.
“What can I say? You’re easily forgotten… or haven’t you learned that from your parents?”
I was sure I had done it and that maybe he would kill me.
“How do you feel?”
Like I just took a round trip to hell and back. “Why do you care? So you can hurt me more?”
“Perhaps, but it isn’t a reason not to answer the question. If I want to hurt you, Shelly, I will. Haven’t I proven that?”
I sat up then, and my gaze instantly fell on Keenan sitting against the dresser with his knees drawn up and his arms resting against them. I wondered how he could tell I had woken up from his position. Even now, he watched me. His gaze never wavered.
I took a deep breath and matched his stare. Even if I felt none of the bravado I displayed, I had to make him believe it. “The only thing you proved is that you are unstable.”
“I learned a lot about myself while I was away. I can promise you my mind is functioning better than ever.”
“So, is that what you ran away to do? To find yourself?”
“No.” He rose to his feet and left the room with silent steps. Despite my disgust, I couldn’t help but admire him. Everything about him was different now. He moved and talked in the manner of a predator. It was as if he were hunting for something.
It was as if he wanted a victim.
I used the opportunity to check over my sore body that was covered in red patches. None of the injuries appeared too serious. The only scars I would carry were too far beneath the surface.
“Are you ignoring me?” My head snapped up and towards the bedroom door where Keenan stood watching me.
“What?”
He moved from the door to stand at the foot of the bed. When he leaned down to plant his hands on either side of my legs, I fought the urge to back away. “I’ve been calling your name.”
“I obviously didn’t hear you.”
“Would you like more of before?” His expression hadn’t changed, but his eyes were nearly black with ire.
“Please don’t.”
He said nothing as he stood upright and held out his hand. I stared down at his hand dumbfounded. “I can take you or I can make you,” he said softly when I hesitated a little too long.
My hand slid slowly into his, and I could have sworn he rubbed my knuckles with this thumb before he pulled me to my feet.
“Slowly,” I pleaded. My body was sore and my movements stiff.
He didn’t reply, but his steps were slow as he led me from the room. When we entered the bathroom shortly after, I lost all the breath in my body and control over my limbs.
I fell to the floor, but his hand kept a tight grip on mine. “Keenan, no.”
The entire time I pleaded, my eyes remained locked on the tub full of water. Sinister thoughts ran rampant in my mind. I didn’t realize I was crawling backward until my back hit the wall.
“What are you doing?” His tone lacked patience as he took heavy steps toward me.
When I finally opened my eyes, my gaze first landed on an old poster of Megan Fox posing in a superwoman costume. I remember the day we hung it up after fighting over who would get to keep her. He assumed at first that she was an inspiration for how I wanted to look. I revealed that I had an even bigger crush on her that I couldn’t and wouldn’t explain. It was also the first time he told me that he loved me.
At first, I laughed it off until I witnessed what had to be the first sincere moment we shared in the brief months we dated.
It just so happened shortly after the bliss of falling in love was followed by two years of heartbreak because of his cheating.
Before that summer day in his bedroom, he had been someone I could trust, but something shattered that. It wasn’t until it was too late when I realized we had been doomed from the start.
“I thought about tearing it down.”
Keenan’s deep voice pulled me from the past. It was a constant battle not to live in the past, but it was an all-out war not to be afraid of the present.
“So why haven’t you?” The raspy sound of my voice was a testament to the pain I had endured however long since I’d been passed out. I could still hear my screams from when the nearly scalding water poured onto my skin.
“Because there is no such thing as destroying a memory. It’s impossible.”
“It’s not impossible. I managed to forget about you all these years.”
“And yet here I am… Besides, we both know that’s a lie.” The bite in his tone was barely audible, but the resentment was there.
“What can I say? You’re easily forgotten… or haven’t you learned that from your parents?”
I was sure I had done it and that maybe he would kill me.
“How do you feel?”
Like I just took a round trip to hell and back. “Why do you care? So you can hurt me more?”
“Perhaps, but it isn’t a reason not to answer the question. If I want to hurt you, Shelly, I will. Haven’t I proven that?”
I sat up then, and my gaze instantly fell on Keenan sitting against the dresser with his knees drawn up and his arms resting against them. I wondered how he could tell I had woken up from his position. Even now, he watched me. His gaze never wavered.
I took a deep breath and matched his stare. Even if I felt none of the bravado I displayed, I had to make him believe it. “The only thing you proved is that you are unstable.”
“I learned a lot about myself while I was away. I can promise you my mind is functioning better than ever.”
“So, is that what you ran away to do? To find yourself?”
“No.” He rose to his feet and left the room with silent steps. Despite my disgust, I couldn’t help but admire him. Everything about him was different now. He moved and talked in the manner of a predator. It was as if he were hunting for something.
It was as if he wanted a victim.
I used the opportunity to check over my sore body that was covered in red patches. None of the injuries appeared too serious. The only scars I would carry were too far beneath the surface.
“Are you ignoring me?” My head snapped up and towards the bedroom door where Keenan stood watching me.
“What?”
He moved from the door to stand at the foot of the bed. When he leaned down to plant his hands on either side of my legs, I fought the urge to back away. “I’ve been calling your name.”
“I obviously didn’t hear you.”
“Would you like more of before?” His expression hadn’t changed, but his eyes were nearly black with ire.
“Please don’t.”
He said nothing as he stood upright and held out his hand. I stared down at his hand dumbfounded. “I can take you or I can make you,” he said softly when I hesitated a little too long.
My hand slid slowly into his, and I could have sworn he rubbed my knuckles with this thumb before he pulled me to my feet.
“Slowly,” I pleaded. My body was sore and my movements stiff.
He didn’t reply, but his steps were slow as he led me from the room. When we entered the bathroom shortly after, I lost all the breath in my body and control over my limbs.
I fell to the floor, but his hand kept a tight grip on mine. “Keenan, no.”
The entire time I pleaded, my eyes remained locked on the tub full of water. Sinister thoughts ran rampant in my mind. I didn’t realize I was crawling backward until my back hit the wall.
“What are you doing?” His tone lacked patience as he took heavy steps toward me.
