Fighting to Be Free
Page 18
Most of them were small, but a couple of them were raised and puckered and looked like they must have been deep.
They were a long time healed but I had to bite my lip to stop myself from crying for him. He had a few little round marks that looked like old burns or something. I trailed my fingers over them tenderly. When I got to a big scar the stretched all the way from his hip to half way across his stomach, I winced, and tried not to image the pain that this must have caused him. I bent my head and kissed it lightly.
“Hey,” he mumbled sleepily, putting his hand on the back of my head. I turned to look at him, willing myself not to cry about this. He sighed and rolled so he was on top of me. “Guess you’re gonna ask me about that now, huh?” he said a little sadly.
“I want to, but if you don’t want to tell me, that’s ok,” I said quietly, biting my lip.
“You want the truth or the lie?” he asked quietly.
Ok what the hell is that about? “The lie,” I whispered, running my hands up his back and pulling him closer to me, I could feel the scars on his back and I wanted to see them too. How the hell could this beautiful boy be put through so much pain like this?
“I’m clumsy, I fall down a lot,” he stated, kissing my neck.
“And now tell me the truth,” I said, holding my breath, not even sure if I wanted to know.
He sighed, “I didn’t have a very good childhood, Ellie. The people who should have looked after me, didn’t,” he said simply. I could hear the anger in his tone. I couldn’t help it, a tear escaped even though I was trying my hardest to keep them back and not make this harder for him.
The subject was close to my heart, one of my friends had been through something similar. She was messed up, but not to the extent of being scarred like Jamie, just emotionally messed up.
My heart broke for him and I just didn’t know what to say, so I pulled his face to mine and kissed him. He kissed me back fiercely; I wrapped my arms around him tightly as if I could save him from the memory of it. I could feel him start to get aroused against my thigh. Wow, this boy is insatiable!
Three times in one night not enough for him? We’d even used up the box of condoms so it’s not like I could have sex with him again anyway, even though my body was screaming for him again too.
He pulled away when I was breathless, and I smiled sadly at him. “Don’t feel sorry for me. It was a long time ago, I don’t need your sympathy, it’s ok,” he said quietly, kissing down my neck to my br**sts.
I pulled his face back to mine, “No more condoms, stud,” I teased, raising my eyebrows and smirking at him.
“Yeah I know, that doesn’t mean I can’t make you scream.” He grinned at me wickedly as he kissed back down my body again. Holy crap this is the best night and morning of my life.
……………………
About an hour later, I was dressed in my outfit from last night, jeez I felt like a slut. The dress was way too short and way too tight. How on earth could I have liked wearing this last night? Oh yeah, because I was off my face. I cringed as I looked in his mirror, trying to pull the bottom down and somehow make it longer. I imagined walking in to Stacey’s house wearing this, having her parents knowing I stayed out like a dirty stop out.
Jamie laughed quietly and threw a t-shirt at me. “Here, you can put this on over it if you want.” He was grinning from ear to ear.
“It’s that obvious that I look like a dirty tramp, is it?” I asked, giggling.
He grabbed my waist and pulled me to him, “I think you look beautiful. Even more beautiful this morning with no make-up than you did last night, and that’s saying something because last night you took my breath away,” he said kissing me passionately.
Oh my God, this boy is too sweet, corny, but sweet.
I pushed him away laughing, “Again with the corny lines? You’re out of condoms stud, not gonna get you anywhere,” I teased as I slipped his t-shirt on over my skimpy dress.
“Well….. will it get me your phone number?” he asked a little nervously.
“Err Jamie, look you seem like a really nice guy and last night was awesome, but I’ve just got out of a relationship, I’m not really interested in starting anything right now,” I said honestly.
Last night was fun and the best night of my life, but I couldn’t deal with something heavy right now, not after Mark, I mean that started out great too. I just wanted to be on my own for a while, do my own thing without having to worry or ask anyone’s permission before I did something.
“Oh right yeah ok, that’s fine,” he said shyly.
He threw on some clean clothes, “Come on then, I’ll drive you home,” he said quietly, ushering me out of his room. He led me down the road slightly to a beat up old pickup truck. “Sorry, bit pathetic, huh?” he said, looking embarrassed as he opened the passenger door for me, waiting for me to get in.
I noticed that he kept glancing round everywhere. “You looking for something?” I asked confused.
He shook his head and laughed and ran round to his side of the car, he waited until we pulled out before he spoke.
“No, I just stole this truck I was making sure there were no cops around.” He grinned at me wickedly and I felt my heart skip a beat in my chest. I gasped and looked round, oh god, we just stole a car? “Kidding, jeez you think I would steal a piece of crap like this?” he said, laughing his ass off.
They were a long time healed but I had to bite my lip to stop myself from crying for him. He had a few little round marks that looked like old burns or something. I trailed my fingers over them tenderly. When I got to a big scar the stretched all the way from his hip to half way across his stomach, I winced, and tried not to image the pain that this must have caused him. I bent my head and kissed it lightly.
“Hey,” he mumbled sleepily, putting his hand on the back of my head. I turned to look at him, willing myself not to cry about this. He sighed and rolled so he was on top of me. “Guess you’re gonna ask me about that now, huh?” he said a little sadly.
“I want to, but if you don’t want to tell me, that’s ok,” I said quietly, biting my lip.
“You want the truth or the lie?” he asked quietly.
Ok what the hell is that about? “The lie,” I whispered, running my hands up his back and pulling him closer to me, I could feel the scars on his back and I wanted to see them too. How the hell could this beautiful boy be put through so much pain like this?
“I’m clumsy, I fall down a lot,” he stated, kissing my neck.
“And now tell me the truth,” I said, holding my breath, not even sure if I wanted to know.
He sighed, “I didn’t have a very good childhood, Ellie. The people who should have looked after me, didn’t,” he said simply. I could hear the anger in his tone. I couldn’t help it, a tear escaped even though I was trying my hardest to keep them back and not make this harder for him.
The subject was close to my heart, one of my friends had been through something similar. She was messed up, but not to the extent of being scarred like Jamie, just emotionally messed up.
My heart broke for him and I just didn’t know what to say, so I pulled his face to mine and kissed him. He kissed me back fiercely; I wrapped my arms around him tightly as if I could save him from the memory of it. I could feel him start to get aroused against my thigh. Wow, this boy is insatiable!
Three times in one night not enough for him? We’d even used up the box of condoms so it’s not like I could have sex with him again anyway, even though my body was screaming for him again too.
He pulled away when I was breathless, and I smiled sadly at him. “Don’t feel sorry for me. It was a long time ago, I don’t need your sympathy, it’s ok,” he said quietly, kissing down my neck to my br**sts.
I pulled his face back to mine, “No more condoms, stud,” I teased, raising my eyebrows and smirking at him.
“Yeah I know, that doesn’t mean I can’t make you scream.” He grinned at me wickedly as he kissed back down my body again. Holy crap this is the best night and morning of my life.
……………………
About an hour later, I was dressed in my outfit from last night, jeez I felt like a slut. The dress was way too short and way too tight. How on earth could I have liked wearing this last night? Oh yeah, because I was off my face. I cringed as I looked in his mirror, trying to pull the bottom down and somehow make it longer. I imagined walking in to Stacey’s house wearing this, having her parents knowing I stayed out like a dirty stop out.
Jamie laughed quietly and threw a t-shirt at me. “Here, you can put this on over it if you want.” He was grinning from ear to ear.
“It’s that obvious that I look like a dirty tramp, is it?” I asked, giggling.
He grabbed my waist and pulled me to him, “I think you look beautiful. Even more beautiful this morning with no make-up than you did last night, and that’s saying something because last night you took my breath away,” he said kissing me passionately.
Oh my God, this boy is too sweet, corny, but sweet.
I pushed him away laughing, “Again with the corny lines? You’re out of condoms stud, not gonna get you anywhere,” I teased as I slipped his t-shirt on over my skimpy dress.
“Well….. will it get me your phone number?” he asked a little nervously.
“Err Jamie, look you seem like a really nice guy and last night was awesome, but I’ve just got out of a relationship, I’m not really interested in starting anything right now,” I said honestly.
Last night was fun and the best night of my life, but I couldn’t deal with something heavy right now, not after Mark, I mean that started out great too. I just wanted to be on my own for a while, do my own thing without having to worry or ask anyone’s permission before I did something.
“Oh right yeah ok, that’s fine,” he said shyly.
He threw on some clean clothes, “Come on then, I’ll drive you home,” he said quietly, ushering me out of his room. He led me down the road slightly to a beat up old pickup truck. “Sorry, bit pathetic, huh?” he said, looking embarrassed as he opened the passenger door for me, waiting for me to get in.
I noticed that he kept glancing round everywhere. “You looking for something?” I asked confused.
He shook his head and laughed and ran round to his side of the car, he waited until we pulled out before he spoke.
“No, I just stole this truck I was making sure there were no cops around.” He grinned at me wickedly and I felt my heart skip a beat in my chest. I gasped and looked round, oh god, we just stole a car? “Kidding, jeez you think I would steal a piece of crap like this?” he said, laughing his ass off.
