Find You in the Dark
Page 19
Clay shrugged again. Was that his only reply? He was being really rude. Not at all like the Clay I had come to know over the last week. I felt a knot in my stomach by his attitude. He was so rigid in his seat as though he wanted to be anywhere but at our table. I just didn't get what he was trying to do? I mean, he was the one who had approached us. But now, he looked as though he couldn't be finished with his food fast enough.
Was it me? Had I done something wrong? Should I have been more vocal to my friends when they were being so weird towards him? Why was I obsessing over what I did? But did I do something?
Then after a few minutes of complete silence, Clay stood up. I looked up at him in surprise. What the heck was going on?
He finally looked down at me and I saw his face soften a bit. “Thanks for letting me sit with you. I'll see you later.” He gave me a half smile and then turned around and left.
“What the f**k was that?” Daniel asked after Clay had left. I was still watching him make his way through the cafeteria, his shoulders slumped over and his head down. I had no idea how to answer Daniel's question. Because I don't know what that was.
“Maybe he's just shy.” Rachel volunteered. Daniel snorted. “Or a whack job. He has that whole school shooter thing going on, you know?” Okay, that made me lose it. “You don't even know him, Daniel! So stop being so god damn judgmental! Maybe he was acting strange because you were being an ass! Did you ever think about that?” My voice was loud and I had to struggle to calm myself down.
Daniel looked at me like I had grown a second head. I never yelled at him. Ever. “What is your problem, Mags?” He asked me. “Ugg!” I gathered up my trash. “My problem is that Clay is my friend. And you are my friend. So you need to start learning to get along with him. And maybe next time engage in a little conversation. Show people you have more than the social skills of a f**king first grader!”
“Maggie! Chill out!” Rachel urged, trying to smooth over the situation that had started to escalate. I just shook my head and got up to leave. Forgetting that I was really sore, I groaned as I moved too quickly.
Rachel was on her feet and moved to stop me from leaving. “We're sorry okay? We didn't mean to make him feel uncomfortable. The whole thing just threw us all right?” She was using the placating tone she usually reserved for Daniel.
What was my problem? Why was I so upset with them? It wasn't like me to fly off the handle like that. I needed to get myself in check.
Sighing, I gave Rachel a quick hug. “I know. Thanks. But I better go catch up with Clay, make sure he's cool.” I gave my friends a smile and took off out of the cafeteria.
Looking down the hallway, I saw Clay at the other end. “Clay!” I called out, moving quickly toward him. He didn't turn around. Did he not hear me, or was he ignoring me?
I caught up with him and grabbed his arm to stop him from walking. I felt his muscles tense under my arm. I moved so that I was standing in front of him. His jaw was clenched and he wouldn't look at me. “Why did you leave so quickly?” I asked him. He shrugged (I was starting to really hate it when he did that-). “Didn't really want to hang out with people who didn't want to hang out with me.” He said coldly as he stepped around me to move down the hallway.
“Hold on a sec, Clay. You're being ridiculous.” I let out an incredulous laugh. Okay, so maybe my friends were less than welcoming at first. But I thought his reaction to the whole thing was a bit over the top.
The look Clay leveled at me froze my blood. Clearly, he didn't think he was being ridiculous. Without saying another word, he left me standing alone in the hallway. This time, I didn't go after him. There was only so much rejection a gal can take.
I stomped back to my locker, throwing the door open so that it bounced off the metal behind it. “Seeing as you're in a seriously shitty mood, I'm assuming lover boy was still an ass when you chased him down like a love sick puppy?” Daniel snarked, leaning on the locker beside me.
I yanked my books for the afternoon from the top shelf and glared at my friend. “What is your problem with him anyway, Daniel? It's not like you to be such a dick to someone you don't even know.” I couldn't help the hurt that bled through my voice. I tried to stay indignant and self-righteous but I could hear the vulnerability in my words.
Daniel softened immediately and put a hand on my shoulder, squeezing slightly. “Sorry, Mags. I know you want to be friends with this dude. But there's just something about him that rubs me the wrong way. But I'll put on the happy face, just for you.” I smiled at him and leaned in to give him a hug. Daniel patted my back awkwardly, unaccustomed to such a show of affection from me.
He pulled back and looked at me, a strange look on his face. “What?” I asked him, frowning. Daniel only shook his head. “You really like this guy? I mean really?” He seemed to be in a state of disbelief. Why was that such a strange concept for Daniel to get?
“Yeah, Danny. I really, really like him.” I couldn't help my dreamy tone and I tried to ignore the eye roll Daniel gave me. “Why? He has the personality of a rock. I don't get it.” Daniel seemed genuinely perplexed. And I guess I didn't blame him. It wasn't as though he had seen the Clay that I did. The Clay that made me forget everyone and everything else.
“No he doesn't. He's a lot of fun. I can talk to him about stuff that I can't talk about with anyone else. He has this crazy spontaneous side that makes everything we do so fun. He's cute and smart and...” Daniel held up his hand.
Was it me? Had I done something wrong? Should I have been more vocal to my friends when they were being so weird towards him? Why was I obsessing over what I did? But did I do something?
Then after a few minutes of complete silence, Clay stood up. I looked up at him in surprise. What the heck was going on?
He finally looked down at me and I saw his face soften a bit. “Thanks for letting me sit with you. I'll see you later.” He gave me a half smile and then turned around and left.
“What the f**k was that?” Daniel asked after Clay had left. I was still watching him make his way through the cafeteria, his shoulders slumped over and his head down. I had no idea how to answer Daniel's question. Because I don't know what that was.
“Maybe he's just shy.” Rachel volunteered. Daniel snorted. “Or a whack job. He has that whole school shooter thing going on, you know?” Okay, that made me lose it. “You don't even know him, Daniel! So stop being so god damn judgmental! Maybe he was acting strange because you were being an ass! Did you ever think about that?” My voice was loud and I had to struggle to calm myself down.
Daniel looked at me like I had grown a second head. I never yelled at him. Ever. “What is your problem, Mags?” He asked me. “Ugg!” I gathered up my trash. “My problem is that Clay is my friend. And you are my friend. So you need to start learning to get along with him. And maybe next time engage in a little conversation. Show people you have more than the social skills of a f**king first grader!”
“Maggie! Chill out!” Rachel urged, trying to smooth over the situation that had started to escalate. I just shook my head and got up to leave. Forgetting that I was really sore, I groaned as I moved too quickly.
Rachel was on her feet and moved to stop me from leaving. “We're sorry okay? We didn't mean to make him feel uncomfortable. The whole thing just threw us all right?” She was using the placating tone she usually reserved for Daniel.
What was my problem? Why was I so upset with them? It wasn't like me to fly off the handle like that. I needed to get myself in check.
Sighing, I gave Rachel a quick hug. “I know. Thanks. But I better go catch up with Clay, make sure he's cool.” I gave my friends a smile and took off out of the cafeteria.
Looking down the hallway, I saw Clay at the other end. “Clay!” I called out, moving quickly toward him. He didn't turn around. Did he not hear me, or was he ignoring me?
I caught up with him and grabbed his arm to stop him from walking. I felt his muscles tense under my arm. I moved so that I was standing in front of him. His jaw was clenched and he wouldn't look at me. “Why did you leave so quickly?” I asked him. He shrugged (I was starting to really hate it when he did that-). “Didn't really want to hang out with people who didn't want to hang out with me.” He said coldly as he stepped around me to move down the hallway.
“Hold on a sec, Clay. You're being ridiculous.” I let out an incredulous laugh. Okay, so maybe my friends were less than welcoming at first. But I thought his reaction to the whole thing was a bit over the top.
The look Clay leveled at me froze my blood. Clearly, he didn't think he was being ridiculous. Without saying another word, he left me standing alone in the hallway. This time, I didn't go after him. There was only so much rejection a gal can take.
I stomped back to my locker, throwing the door open so that it bounced off the metal behind it. “Seeing as you're in a seriously shitty mood, I'm assuming lover boy was still an ass when you chased him down like a love sick puppy?” Daniel snarked, leaning on the locker beside me.
I yanked my books for the afternoon from the top shelf and glared at my friend. “What is your problem with him anyway, Daniel? It's not like you to be such a dick to someone you don't even know.” I couldn't help the hurt that bled through my voice. I tried to stay indignant and self-righteous but I could hear the vulnerability in my words.
Daniel softened immediately and put a hand on my shoulder, squeezing slightly. “Sorry, Mags. I know you want to be friends with this dude. But there's just something about him that rubs me the wrong way. But I'll put on the happy face, just for you.” I smiled at him and leaned in to give him a hug. Daniel patted my back awkwardly, unaccustomed to such a show of affection from me.
He pulled back and looked at me, a strange look on his face. “What?” I asked him, frowning. Daniel only shook his head. “You really like this guy? I mean really?” He seemed to be in a state of disbelief. Why was that such a strange concept for Daniel to get?
“Yeah, Danny. I really, really like him.” I couldn't help my dreamy tone and I tried to ignore the eye roll Daniel gave me. “Why? He has the personality of a rock. I don't get it.” Daniel seemed genuinely perplexed. And I guess I didn't blame him. It wasn't as though he had seen the Clay that I did. The Clay that made me forget everyone and everything else.
“No he doesn't. He's a lot of fun. I can talk to him about stuff that I can't talk about with anyone else. He has this crazy spontaneous side that makes everything we do so fun. He's cute and smart and...” Daniel held up his hand.
