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Find You in the Dark

Page 23

   


“Melissa's parties aren't like that. Her parents are usually there somewhere. It's typically a bonfire in her back field with music and people just hanging out. It's a good time.” Clay still seemed a bit unsure but took me at my word. “Okay then, sounds good.” He said and gave his first real smile since I had brought the whole party thing up.
“Great!” I said a little too loudly and I winced at my overt display of enthusiasm. Clay reached over and squeezed my hand. I startled at the physical contact. He wasn't a touchy feely kind of guy, so I was taken aback by it. “You're so cute when you get excited.” He said, looking at me with something that could only be described as tenderness.
I know I stopped breathing. He thought I was cute? Our eyes held each others', not moving away. A moment began to build and Clay took in a sharp breath. His eyes dropped to my lips and I could have sworn he wanted to kiss me. My tongued darted out and wet my suddenly dry lips and I watched his eyes follow the movement.
The air crackled with the tension. Clayton's eyes burned with intensity. I felt like we were trapped in slow motion. His hand came up and lightly touched my face. I angled my cheek toward his palm and I closed my eyes. “Maggie.” He whispered, his breath on my face as he moved closer.
And my phone started buzzing in my pocket. Why did this always happen?! Clay immediately jumped back, putting space between us. He was suddenly focused on finishing his task of unloading the boxes on the floor. Crap! Someone had better be dying! I glanced at the screen on my phone and saw Rachel's name.
“What?” I barked after I answered. “Jeez. Who pissed in your cornflakes?” Rachel's testy voice asked on the other end. I took a steadying breath and tried to calm the frantic beat of my heart. I looked back over at Clay but he had turned away from me.
“Sorry, Rach. What do you need?” I mollified, trying to not sound as agitated as I felt. “I was just calling to see what time you wanted me to pick you up tonight.” She said, still sounding miffed by my earlier attitude. “You're not going with Daniel? I thought you guys were riding over together.” I asked, already fearing the answer. Daniel must have bailed on her, thus her prickliness. Confirming my thoughts, Rachel told me that he had called an hour ago and said he'd be taking Kylie to the party. Rachel sounded so dejected that I wanted to call Daniel and ream him out. I was sick of him doing this to her. Even if he was my other best friend, it didn't mean I had to sit by and watch him be so thoughtless all the time.
I didn't comment on Daniel's ass-itude, knowing that it wouldn't help Rachel feel better. “Hold on.” I told her, covering the mouth piece with my hand. “Hey, Clay.” I whispered. Clay turned around, not really meeting my eyes. His expression was cold. Great, he was totally regretting our little moment earlier. Whatever, I could play the I- don't- care game with the best of them.
“Do you want to ride with me and Rachel?” Clay shrugged. “I can just meet you guys there. Don't worry about me.” He said, turning back around, walls firmly in place. His nerves from earlier seemed to have taken a back seat to his need to stay away from me. I suppressed a sigh and returned to my conversation with Rachel. “Eight-thirty sound good to you?” I asked her, trying to sound more upbeat. The truth was I was bummed that Clay wouldn't be going to the party with me. Sure he said he'd meet us there, but it's not the same as actually arriving together.
“Sounds fab. I'll see you then.” And with that, Rachel hung up. I put my phone on the table and picked up my jacket. Jamming my arms through the sleeves I roughly zipped it up with an annoyed huff. Clay turned at the noise and looked surprised. “You leaving already?” He asked me. I met his eyes defiantly. I was hurt by his attitude after our near kiss minutes earlier. Maybe I was setting all my hopes on something that most certainly wouldn't happen. But it didn't stop the stop the sting. I just wanted to get out of there, put some space between me and this moody boy who I felt that I would never understand.
Clay's face softened, as if he were reading my thoughts. “Okay then.” He said quietly, taking a small step toward me. I held my ground, not moving toward or away from him. “Guess I'll see you tonight. You're not going to bail at the last minute are you?” I asked him, frustrated by the needy note to my voice. “No, I'll be there. Wild horses couldn't keep me away.” He said with his ironic smile. I didn't smile back, my feelings still hurt too much.
I turned away and walked toward the door. “See you then.” I called over my shoulder, refusing to show how badly I wanted that moment to happen. How much I wanted him to call me back, pull me in his arms, and kiss me senseless. When did I become this gooey romantic? When did I become freaking Rachel? I shuddered.
“Maggie.” He stopped me with the sound of my name on his lips. I didn't turn around and he made no move to come any closer. Every second that passed amped up the angst level to an unbearable degree. Did he realize how much I wanted him? Needed him with a passion that scared me? Or was he a dolt just like Daniel?
Clay cleared his throat. “I can't wait to see you tonight.” He said, almost strangling on his words. My cheeks flushed hot. I nodded again with my back to him, and left.
Dolt it was.
Once outside with the door firmly closed behind me, I sagged. I wasn't sure how long I could keep up this “friendship.” Not when I wanted so much more. I'd never experienced anything like the crazy feelings that Clayton stirred up inside of me and I didn't know what to do about it. There had been about thirty seconds there when I just knew he wanted the same thing I did before the window slammed shut.