Finding Faith

Page 21

With my attention back on the auburn head, I couldn’t miss the fact that he kept looking over and smiling at Faith. She’d smile back, but the smiles never reached her eyes. She wasn’t into him. She couldn’t be into him. I mean, he was a short, redheaded boy with freckles and a mouth full of metal. Then again, I’m sure that didn’t matter since her dad was letting her out of her cell as long as she was with him.
After five secret looks between the two, I couldn’t take it anymore. It pissed me off every time it happened. I stood up and slipped out the back of the church. I leaned up against the brick and wished I had a smoke. I’d pretty much quit, but I’d give my left nut for bowl packed with some sticky green cush.
I leaned my head back against the brick and took in some fresh air. I wanted to be away from the church, the pastor, and all the craziness. I only had a few days left of community service, so I skipped. It was the only day I left without getting my paper signed. I was exhausted and I just wanted to go home and spend some time with my mom before the band came over to practice.
That afternoon, Uncle Lester stopped by for his money and hooked me up with his new stock. Even though I wanted to, I didn’t sample it. The whole drug scene felt different to me—it felt wrong. I was considering giving it up altogether and getting a real job—something with benefits and drug tests, something with health insurance for my mom.
Reynolds gave me the okay on the powder and then bought half of it from me on the spot. I spent the rest of the night singing my ass off and goofing off with the boys. Amanda, Kevin’s most recent girl and also Faith’s friend, came with Kevin and watched from my couch. I thought about quizzing her on all things Faith but decided against looking like a total pussy boy.
The following Wednesday, I got to spend time with Faith. We got stuck in the back room, putting together posters for some car washing event the church was having. The church was big on raising money. Faith explained to me how the money was used to improve the church, but all I could think about was how sweet her mouth looked when she talked.
I watched across the table as she drew pretty angel wings on her words and dotted her I’s with hearts. Chicks were always doing senseless shit like that, but when Faith did it, it was cute. She didn’t do things to impress others—she did them because she wanted to go the extra step, because she enjoyed doing her best.
Every now and again, her hair would fall into her face and she’d push it back. She never wore it up. As much as I loved her hair, I’d love to push it back and look at her face clearly just once. I bet Stephen the perfect church boy got to see her face.
“So you never told me how the date went,” I said as I picked up a black marker and started to write.
She looked up from her poster and a soft-pink blush covered her cheeks when she smiled. It left my stomach feeling funny. I didn’t like it. Actually, I hated it.
“It was fun. We went to a movie,” she said as she nervously tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.
She was so cute when she did that.
“That’s it?”
“What do you mean that’s it? What else were we supposed to do?” she asked, confused.
She really had no idea how the whole dating thing worked. Of course maybe I was the one that had it all wrong. Had that been me, we would’ve made out for at least an hour, followed by some hardcore sex, and then I would’ve taken her home as late as possible, if I even took her home at all.
I bet pretty boy took her home early and I bet he didn’t even try to kiss her.
“Did he kiss you?”
I wasn’t sure where the question came from. I wasn’t one to blurt things out, but I’d thought about it so much since that day in the kitchen when she told me she had a date and I needed to know.
Her eyes widened with my question and the blush on her cheeks went from pink to red. Still, she didn’t answer.
“Well, did he? I bet he didn’t. He doesn’t look like that type.”
Her brows pinched a little and I thought maybe I’d made her angry, but then she spoke.
“No. He did.”
Just like that my day when from okay to shitty. I envisioned myself ripping Stephens’s braces from his teeth and forcing them down his throat. The little rat-nosed bastard wasn’t good enough to breathe the same air as Faith, much less put his nasty fucking mouth on her.
“Oh.” I cleared my throat.
It was the stupidest thing to say, but I felt like I was choking and it was the only sound I could get past the imaginary blockage in my throat. Plus, it was better than what I’d been thinking. I was pretty sure if Faith knew I wanted to beat the living shit out of Stephen her opinion of me wouldn’t be good. Not that her opinion of me was any good to start off with.