Finding You

Page 25

Oh shit.
Pressing my lips together, I dug deep and pulled out something my mother used to always tell me.
Your strength lies within you. It’s always there, Grace Hope. You just need to use it.
Turning to Noah, I smiled as I gave him a kiss. “You and me.” Noah’s eyes filled with tears as he nodded. Grayson and Emily walked out of the room as Noah took a few steps backward before turning and walking out the door.
Slowly taking in a deep breath, I walked over to the chair where Grayson had been sitting. Smiling at Lisa, I sat and waited for her to begin talking.
Closing her eyes, she began to talk. “I think I remember the moment I realized my son had fallen in love.”
My eyes stayed on her face as I watched her closely and whispered, “When?”
“It was his sophomore year of college. He had come home and told me he had finally felt it.”
Leaning closer, I asked, “Felt what?”
Lisa opened her eyes and turned to me. “Love. He had run into a beautiful girl with hazel eyes and light-brown hair. Said he knocked her down while walking out a door. The moment he touched her hand to help her up, he felt it.”
My heart slammed against my chest as I listened to Noah’s mother talk about the first time I’d ever met Noah.
Smiling, I took myself back to the first time I met Noah. “I felt it too when we touched. I’ll never forget the first time I saw his smile or I heard his voice. I never believed in love at first sight until I saw Noah’s eyes staring into mine.”
A tear rolled down her cheek as her eyes searched my face. “I don’t know what happened between you both Grace, but I knew my son was unhappy not only because of me, but because he thought he lost you.”
Looking away, I mumbled, “That was my fault. I . . . I let my own fears push him away.” Closing my eyes, I turned back to Lisa. “Noah came for me and something inside me has changed. I don’t really know how to explain it, but I know it’s so very real. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for him.”
“Good. Because he’s going to need you, Grace. When he found out my cancer was back and his father left, Noah snapped. He turned to alcohol and prescription drugs to numb the pain.”
Reaching for Lisa’s hand, I held it gently. “Lisa, Noah doesn’t drink anymore. You don’t have to worry about that.”
Closing her eyes, she slowly shook her head. “Grace, some day when you become a mother, you’re going to know things. Things you can’t really explain. A sixth sense maybe?”
Pulling back, I looked Lisa in the eyes. “Do you think something’s wrong?”
Her eyes pierced mine. “Yes. I’ve seen him take pills. He says they are for his anxiety, and sometimes he takes them to help him sleep.”
My mind quickly thought back to the last two days I’d been with Noah. I hadn’t seen him take any pills. “I’ve been with him the last few days, Lisa. I haven’t seen him take any pills.”
Lisa smiled weakly. “Grace, I know you’re meeting me for the first time and the circumstances are not as neither of us would have wanted. I also know I’m asking a lot of you, but I need you to promise me you won’t give up on him. No matter how hard it might get. Love isn’t always pretty.”
A shiver raced through my body as I stared at Lisa. It was almost as if she knew something no one else knew.
Swallowing hard, I whispered, “I promise you, I’ll never give up on him.” Wiping a tear from my face, I repeated my promise. “I’ll never give up on him, or us.”
Nodding her head, Lisa turned and stared straight up at the ceiling. “I’ve laid here countless hours and tried to picture what my children’s lives would be like once I’ve passed away.” My heart ached for Lisa as I watched her pained expression while she talked about her children’s future.
“Which one of them would have a child first? Would it be a boy or a girl? What will they do for a living? I worry about Noah. He was always a momma’s boy. So sensitive to everything.” A sob escaped Lisa’s lips as she looked away. Reaching my hand out, I gently gave her hand a squeeze.
“I’m so sorry, Grace. Here you are meeting me for the first time and I’m behaving in such a way.”
Your strength lies within you. It’s always there, Grace Hope. You just need to use it.
“Lisa, I wish like hell we had met under different circumstances. I wish we were all sitting in your beautiful home at your dining room table eating an amazing meal. I’d help you clean up the dishes, and we’d stand in the kitchen and talk about Noah and what he was like as a young boy. Then we’d move to the living room where Emily would pull out old pictures of Noah in middle school. There would be lots of stories being told and Noah would probably get mad at his sister at least two or three times for some silly story she shared.”