Firstlife
Page 45
“Why don’t you take another nap?” he says. “I like listening to your one-sided conversations.”
He’s heard my sleep talking? Great! “What have I said?”
“Ten’s tears fall...”
“No. Ten tears fall. The number ten.”
“No. You clearly said Ten’s tears. Your name.”
I did? “Yeah, well, you leak liquid glitter when you’re injured.”
“Glitter? How dare you. My manliness is offended.”
“Your manliness will survive.”
He caresses my shoulder, almost as if he’s petting me. “A spirit doesn’t function like a body. While we have muscle and bone, we’re sustained only by Lifeblood, and when we lose it, we hemorrhage power.”
I try not to react to his touch...yeah, I try. “So, when you lose all your Lifeblood...”
“We experience Second-death.”
“So you can die, even inside the Shell.”
“Yes. I’ve lost many friends that way.”
The news...isn’t welcome. What happens afterward? Fusion, or the Rest?
Another air pocket causes us to lurch, and I go cold inside.
He attempts another distraction. “You should drop Sloan. She’ll always put her wants above your needs.”
“Someone else’s actions will never decide my own.” A facet of my free choice. One I embrace wholeheartedly.
The blue light flashes on his wrists, and he curses.
“A message?” I ask.
“Yes.”
“You aren’t going to respond?”
“No. It’s from Madame.”
“Madame...what?”
“Madame Arse Pain.” His teeth are clenched, his tone filled with disgust. “She’s my Leader.”
“Don’t like working for a woman, huh?”
“Don’t like her, period.”
“What’d she do—”
“Oh, no. I’m not airing my dirty past with her. You still have to deal with her.”
Ah. Madame Bennett.
The light flashes a second time, and he slaps his wrist. “She wants another progress report.”
Another. Just how many of our interactions has he shared with her? “Full disclosure. I’m walking away from you when we land.”
“Me? What’d I do?”
“What you know, Myriad knows and what Myriad knows, my parents know.”
“Your parents haven’t been told of your escape...yet.”
That’s something, at least. “Why the reprieve?”
“Prynne has only informed parents of the deceased, and I requested Myriad keep quiet about you. Your parents...annoy me. Your mother is hiding something, and your father is an adulterous prick.”
Shock and horror nearly choke me. “He’s cheating on my mom?”
Killian goes still. “You didn’t know?”
I shake my head as the plane hits another nasty air pocket, the nose dipping. My internal organs shrivel and for a moment, my mind spins round and round on a carnival ride.
He tightens his grip on my shoulders. “Turbulence is natural, lass. We aren’t going to crash.”
“Don’t use the C-word!”
His chuckle is as beautiful as the rest of him. “I think everyone in the realms heard you. But don’t worry. I’m the big strong manly man and I’ll keep my weak little girl safe.”
“Jerk,” I mutter, but I begin to relax against him. I won’t think about my dad’s infidelity and the mental hatchet job it must be doing on my mom.
Killian leans down, his mouth hovering over my ear. I think he’s going to kiss the lobe but he whispers, “Do us both a favor and sign with Myriad.”
My heart hammers as I lift my head. “Killian—”
Our gazes connect, the air between us heating, crackling. He presses his forehead against mine and cups my nape, his thumb stroking up, into my hair and down, under the collar of my shirt.
“I don’t just want you,” he says. “I want you.”
“I don’t understand the difference,” I tell him honestly. Even still, his admission makes me tingle.
“The first I can easily walk away from. The second...you make me feel—you make me feel.”
The words aren’t pretty, but they’re ragged. His tone isn’t sweet, but raw.
I’m nearly undone. Is he being for real? Or is this just another con to win me over?
The plane jiggles again, but at first, I don’t really care. Not anymore. When it continues, growing increasingly more violent, I freaking care. I freaking care a lot. The bin above us pops open and my backpack spills out as the nose of plane dips at a more acute angle. If not for our seat belts, we would have pitched forward.
This isn’t normal.
I’m nearing full-blown panic when the pilot steps from the cockpit, a bag slung over his shoulders. He moves swiftly, avoiding our gazes.
Killian releases me, saying to the man, “What are you doing?”
The pilot wrenches open the side door and I’m blasted by a cold punch of wind and a hard kick of shock. My hair slaps at my cheeks as he—
Jumps!
“Help! Help! Killian, Ten. He hit me!” Sloan’s screaming voice cuts through the brutal bellow of the airstream. “He’s gone!”
Yes. He’s gone. He, our only means of landing. The shock collides with panic, and my brain nearly shuts down. I focus on Killian. “What should we do?”
“Stay here.” He jerks at his seat belt, his expression grim. “And sign with Myriad. Verbalize your agreement to the terms I presented. Don’t risk your Everlife, Ten. Please. If I can’t land the plane...” He shakes his head, as if he’s unwilling to consider the possibility. “Please,” he repeats.
I remind myself I’m no longer a damsel in distress. I can think this through. What I can’t do? Base my decision on fear. Because, while I might be free to make my choice right now, I’ll never be free from the consequences of that choice. And I think I’d rather wind up in Many Ends than in Troika, warring with Killian, or in Myriad, warring with Archer and Clay.
“D-do you know how to fly a plane?” I shout over the squall.
He remains grim-faced. “As a Laborer, I’ve trained for all kinds of situations.”
I’ll take that as a no.
His buckle finally gives, but the plane has taken another dip and dive. He bangs into the wall that divides front from back. A wall he grips, pulling himself around the edge; a Herculean task considering the gale-force wind.
He disappears from sight and a few seconds later, Sloan peeks out from behind the wall. Foolish girl! She’s going to be sucked out!
I lean over and stretch out my arms. “Grab the hooks on the bracelets!”
As soon as she has a firm hold, I tug while she kicks at the wall. Midair, her body begins to edge toward the opened door. I yank with all my might, using a reservoir of strength I didn’t know I possessed.
She plows into Killian’s vacant seat. Shaking, she buckles up. She’s pale, her cheeks stained with dried tears.
Eyes haunted, she asks, “Do you think we’re going to die? Say no, and I’ll believe you. You never lie.”
I meet her gaze and remain silent.
He’s heard my sleep talking? Great! “What have I said?”
“Ten’s tears fall...”
“No. Ten tears fall. The number ten.”
“No. You clearly said Ten’s tears. Your name.”
I did? “Yeah, well, you leak liquid glitter when you’re injured.”
“Glitter? How dare you. My manliness is offended.”
“Your manliness will survive.”
He caresses my shoulder, almost as if he’s petting me. “A spirit doesn’t function like a body. While we have muscle and bone, we’re sustained only by Lifeblood, and when we lose it, we hemorrhage power.”
I try not to react to his touch...yeah, I try. “So, when you lose all your Lifeblood...”
“We experience Second-death.”
“So you can die, even inside the Shell.”
“Yes. I’ve lost many friends that way.”
The news...isn’t welcome. What happens afterward? Fusion, or the Rest?
Another air pocket causes us to lurch, and I go cold inside.
He attempts another distraction. “You should drop Sloan. She’ll always put her wants above your needs.”
“Someone else’s actions will never decide my own.” A facet of my free choice. One I embrace wholeheartedly.
The blue light flashes on his wrists, and he curses.
“A message?” I ask.
“Yes.”
“You aren’t going to respond?”
“No. It’s from Madame.”
“Madame...what?”
“Madame Arse Pain.” His teeth are clenched, his tone filled with disgust. “She’s my Leader.”
“Don’t like working for a woman, huh?”
“Don’t like her, period.”
“What’d she do—”
“Oh, no. I’m not airing my dirty past with her. You still have to deal with her.”
Ah. Madame Bennett.
The light flashes a second time, and he slaps his wrist. “She wants another progress report.”
Another. Just how many of our interactions has he shared with her? “Full disclosure. I’m walking away from you when we land.”
“Me? What’d I do?”
“What you know, Myriad knows and what Myriad knows, my parents know.”
“Your parents haven’t been told of your escape...yet.”
That’s something, at least. “Why the reprieve?”
“Prynne has only informed parents of the deceased, and I requested Myriad keep quiet about you. Your parents...annoy me. Your mother is hiding something, and your father is an adulterous prick.”
Shock and horror nearly choke me. “He’s cheating on my mom?”
Killian goes still. “You didn’t know?”
I shake my head as the plane hits another nasty air pocket, the nose dipping. My internal organs shrivel and for a moment, my mind spins round and round on a carnival ride.
He tightens his grip on my shoulders. “Turbulence is natural, lass. We aren’t going to crash.”
“Don’t use the C-word!”
His chuckle is as beautiful as the rest of him. “I think everyone in the realms heard you. But don’t worry. I’m the big strong manly man and I’ll keep my weak little girl safe.”
“Jerk,” I mutter, but I begin to relax against him. I won’t think about my dad’s infidelity and the mental hatchet job it must be doing on my mom.
Killian leans down, his mouth hovering over my ear. I think he’s going to kiss the lobe but he whispers, “Do us both a favor and sign with Myriad.”
My heart hammers as I lift my head. “Killian—”
Our gazes connect, the air between us heating, crackling. He presses his forehead against mine and cups my nape, his thumb stroking up, into my hair and down, under the collar of my shirt.
“I don’t just want you,” he says. “I want you.”
“I don’t understand the difference,” I tell him honestly. Even still, his admission makes me tingle.
“The first I can easily walk away from. The second...you make me feel—you make me feel.”
The words aren’t pretty, but they’re ragged. His tone isn’t sweet, but raw.
I’m nearly undone. Is he being for real? Or is this just another con to win me over?
The plane jiggles again, but at first, I don’t really care. Not anymore. When it continues, growing increasingly more violent, I freaking care. I freaking care a lot. The bin above us pops open and my backpack spills out as the nose of plane dips at a more acute angle. If not for our seat belts, we would have pitched forward.
This isn’t normal.
I’m nearing full-blown panic when the pilot steps from the cockpit, a bag slung over his shoulders. He moves swiftly, avoiding our gazes.
Killian releases me, saying to the man, “What are you doing?”
The pilot wrenches open the side door and I’m blasted by a cold punch of wind and a hard kick of shock. My hair slaps at my cheeks as he—
Jumps!
“Help! Help! Killian, Ten. He hit me!” Sloan’s screaming voice cuts through the brutal bellow of the airstream. “He’s gone!”
Yes. He’s gone. He, our only means of landing. The shock collides with panic, and my brain nearly shuts down. I focus on Killian. “What should we do?”
“Stay here.” He jerks at his seat belt, his expression grim. “And sign with Myriad. Verbalize your agreement to the terms I presented. Don’t risk your Everlife, Ten. Please. If I can’t land the plane...” He shakes his head, as if he’s unwilling to consider the possibility. “Please,” he repeats.
I remind myself I’m no longer a damsel in distress. I can think this through. What I can’t do? Base my decision on fear. Because, while I might be free to make my choice right now, I’ll never be free from the consequences of that choice. And I think I’d rather wind up in Many Ends than in Troika, warring with Killian, or in Myriad, warring with Archer and Clay.
“D-do you know how to fly a plane?” I shout over the squall.
He remains grim-faced. “As a Laborer, I’ve trained for all kinds of situations.”
I’ll take that as a no.
His buckle finally gives, but the plane has taken another dip and dive. He bangs into the wall that divides front from back. A wall he grips, pulling himself around the edge; a Herculean task considering the gale-force wind.
He disappears from sight and a few seconds later, Sloan peeks out from behind the wall. Foolish girl! She’s going to be sucked out!
I lean over and stretch out my arms. “Grab the hooks on the bracelets!”
As soon as she has a firm hold, I tug while she kicks at the wall. Midair, her body begins to edge toward the opened door. I yank with all my might, using a reservoir of strength I didn’t know I possessed.
She plows into Killian’s vacant seat. Shaking, she buckles up. She’s pale, her cheeks stained with dried tears.
Eyes haunted, she asks, “Do you think we’re going to die? Say no, and I’ll believe you. You never lie.”
I meet her gaze and remain silent.
