Force of Temptation
Page 96
“Jesse, he’s practically dead! Go to Harley! Check she’s okay!”
Harley.
The name penetrated his red haze, tickling at the last memory he had of his mate. She’d been hurt. His pack mate was right. He needed to see her. The wolf withdrew, even though he was still shaking with rage.
Panting and bleeding, Jesse stood with a wince. He distantly noted that the second guard was dead, having met the same fate as Hector and the first guard, but Jesse was only interested in Harley.
He did as Zander suggested and hurried to where the little cat lay, surrounded by some of their pack. He shoved his way through the wolves. And froze, heart skipping a beat. He felt the blood leave his face. Her body was twisted at an angle that was far from fucking natural. And she wasn’t moving.
She. Was. Not. Moving.
His stomach heaved and the breath left his lungs. His wolf . . . well, he went apeshit again. And Jesse thought he might just do the same.
“She’s not dead, Jesse,” said Roni. “Don’t fucking lose it on me. She’s in bad shape and she needs to hear your voice right now.”
Swallowing hard, Jesse knelt beside his mate. Her brown eyes looked at him, tired and glassy. He couldn’t speak. Hell, he couldn’t think. Fear was choking him and twisting his insides, ripping into him more painfully than the polar bear’s claws and Hector’s fangs.
Jesse reached out to touch her but then fisted his hand, worried his touch wouldn’t be gentle enough. Her breathing was shallow. Too shallow. Each time she inhaled, something in her chest rattled. He wanted to hold her, but he was scared to move her in case he caused her any more pain than she was already in.
“Jesse, talk to her; keep her here,” said Marcus.
Clearing his dry throat, Jesse forced out his words. “Baby . . . mother of fuck. We need Ally.” He glanced around, frantic, but he couldn’t see her. He noticed Cain trying to carefully remove the explosive vest from a shaking Willow while Shaya tried to keep both little girls calm. Their tears and fear only fueled the fire in Jesse’s gut. Anxious, his wolf paced and snarled and raked his claws. “We need Ally,” he repeated.
“I know,” began Roni, “but she got hurt really bad too and now she’s unconscious again.”
Shit. He scrubbed a hand down his face. “Well, where’s Taryn?”
It was Bracken who responded. “Trying to heal Ally, which is proving difficult because not only is Taryn hurt as well, but she’s healed so many injuries tonight she’s pretty weak. She’s barely conscious herself.”
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Jesse stroked one of the cat’s soft paws. Her eyes closed. His heart jumped. “Stay with me, Harley,” he said, panicked. “Okay? Stay with me.”
Nothing. If anything, her breathing turned weaker. His gut twisted in terror.
“That’s it, talk to her,” Roni encouraged him.
Jesse swallowed hard. “One of the healers will come, Harley.” His voice came out coarse with emotion. “Any second now, they’ll come.” They had to come. Someone had to do something because he couldn’t fucking lose her. “You just have to hang on for a minute, all right? Just hang on for me.” Fuck, he needed to hear her voice. Needed to look into her eyes. “Shift back, Harley.”
“I don’t think she has the energy, Jesse,” said Roni. “It’s better if she doesn’t waste what energy she has left trying to shift.”
“Feed her your own energy,” said Marcus.
“I can’t,” Jesse rasped, throat constricting. “There’s no bond.” Unless either of the healers came to help, Harley was going to die right there in front of him. He knew it; he could feel her slipping away. Could hear her heart stuttering and her breathing becoming even slower. She was leaving him. Dying. And there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it.
Not a damn thing.
“Cain’s struggling with the vests,” said Bracken. “I don’t know if he can really help.”
Which meant they could all be dead in moments anyway. But it was Harley’s life that was important to him. And he was losing her. He’d never felt as utterly powerless as he did in that very moment. Never felt so fucking useless. He was her mate, dammit; he should be able to help her. But he couldn’t.
The metallic taste of fear soured his mouth. The insidious emotion had his own heart racing so badly, he thought the damn organ would explode in his chest. But there was no shock, he thought with a frown. Not even a small element of surprise. An all-consuming, soul-deep agony, yes. A haunting, gut-wrenching fear, yes. But no shock.
A part of him had been expecting this to happen, he then understood. Part of him had been waiting for his mate to be taken from him, just like it had happened once before. And so, he realized bitterly, he’d unconsciously held a small part of himself back from Harley.
God, he was such a fucking idiot. He’d thought he was completely open to her, thought he’d given her all of him. But no, he’d held back this one little piece out of blind terror that he’d have to go through the sheer agony of losing her—an agony he’d felt as a kid and hadn’t ever wanted to experience again. But in protecting himself emotionally, he’d left her physically vulnerable. And now she was dying. Fading away right in front of him.
“Harley, I’m so fucking sorry, baby, I didn’t know I was doing it,” he swore, voice breaking. “I swear to God, I didn’t know.” Her eyes slowly opened but just as quickly closed again. His wolf howled, shaking with rage and pain.
Harley.
The name penetrated his red haze, tickling at the last memory he had of his mate. She’d been hurt. His pack mate was right. He needed to see her. The wolf withdrew, even though he was still shaking with rage.
Panting and bleeding, Jesse stood with a wince. He distantly noted that the second guard was dead, having met the same fate as Hector and the first guard, but Jesse was only interested in Harley.
He did as Zander suggested and hurried to where the little cat lay, surrounded by some of their pack. He shoved his way through the wolves. And froze, heart skipping a beat. He felt the blood leave his face. Her body was twisted at an angle that was far from fucking natural. And she wasn’t moving.
She. Was. Not. Moving.
His stomach heaved and the breath left his lungs. His wolf . . . well, he went apeshit again. And Jesse thought he might just do the same.
“She’s not dead, Jesse,” said Roni. “Don’t fucking lose it on me. She’s in bad shape and she needs to hear your voice right now.”
Swallowing hard, Jesse knelt beside his mate. Her brown eyes looked at him, tired and glassy. He couldn’t speak. Hell, he couldn’t think. Fear was choking him and twisting his insides, ripping into him more painfully than the polar bear’s claws and Hector’s fangs.
Jesse reached out to touch her but then fisted his hand, worried his touch wouldn’t be gentle enough. Her breathing was shallow. Too shallow. Each time she inhaled, something in her chest rattled. He wanted to hold her, but he was scared to move her in case he caused her any more pain than she was already in.
“Jesse, talk to her; keep her here,” said Marcus.
Clearing his dry throat, Jesse forced out his words. “Baby . . . mother of fuck. We need Ally.” He glanced around, frantic, but he couldn’t see her. He noticed Cain trying to carefully remove the explosive vest from a shaking Willow while Shaya tried to keep both little girls calm. Their tears and fear only fueled the fire in Jesse’s gut. Anxious, his wolf paced and snarled and raked his claws. “We need Ally,” he repeated.
“I know,” began Roni, “but she got hurt really bad too and now she’s unconscious again.”
Shit. He scrubbed a hand down his face. “Well, where’s Taryn?”
It was Bracken who responded. “Trying to heal Ally, which is proving difficult because not only is Taryn hurt as well, but she’s healed so many injuries tonight she’s pretty weak. She’s barely conscious herself.”
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Jesse stroked one of the cat’s soft paws. Her eyes closed. His heart jumped. “Stay with me, Harley,” he said, panicked. “Okay? Stay with me.”
Nothing. If anything, her breathing turned weaker. His gut twisted in terror.
“That’s it, talk to her,” Roni encouraged him.
Jesse swallowed hard. “One of the healers will come, Harley.” His voice came out coarse with emotion. “Any second now, they’ll come.” They had to come. Someone had to do something because he couldn’t fucking lose her. “You just have to hang on for a minute, all right? Just hang on for me.” Fuck, he needed to hear her voice. Needed to look into her eyes. “Shift back, Harley.”
“I don’t think she has the energy, Jesse,” said Roni. “It’s better if she doesn’t waste what energy she has left trying to shift.”
“Feed her your own energy,” said Marcus.
“I can’t,” Jesse rasped, throat constricting. “There’s no bond.” Unless either of the healers came to help, Harley was going to die right there in front of him. He knew it; he could feel her slipping away. Could hear her heart stuttering and her breathing becoming even slower. She was leaving him. Dying. And there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it.
Not a damn thing.
“Cain’s struggling with the vests,” said Bracken. “I don’t know if he can really help.”
Which meant they could all be dead in moments anyway. But it was Harley’s life that was important to him. And he was losing her. He’d never felt as utterly powerless as he did in that very moment. Never felt so fucking useless. He was her mate, dammit; he should be able to help her. But he couldn’t.
The metallic taste of fear soured his mouth. The insidious emotion had his own heart racing so badly, he thought the damn organ would explode in his chest. But there was no shock, he thought with a frown. Not even a small element of surprise. An all-consuming, soul-deep agony, yes. A haunting, gut-wrenching fear, yes. But no shock.
A part of him had been expecting this to happen, he then understood. Part of him had been waiting for his mate to be taken from him, just like it had happened once before. And so, he realized bitterly, he’d unconsciously held a small part of himself back from Harley.
God, he was such a fucking idiot. He’d thought he was completely open to her, thought he’d given her all of him. But no, he’d held back this one little piece out of blind terror that he’d have to go through the sheer agony of losing her—an agony he’d felt as a kid and hadn’t ever wanted to experience again. But in protecting himself emotionally, he’d left her physically vulnerable. And now she was dying. Fading away right in front of him.
“Harley, I’m so fucking sorry, baby, I didn’t know I was doing it,” he swore, voice breaking. “I swear to God, I didn’t know.” Her eyes slowly opened but just as quickly closed again. His wolf howled, shaking with rage and pain.
