Forever, Jack
Page 57
I swallowed as I slid over on the cool leather seats, careful not to tear the beads on my dress. “Whoa. Where did you get this? A bit fancy for the Lowcountry isn’t it?” I looked around the interior.
Jack laughed. “I wasn’t sure if I’d need room for your friends on the ride back.” He slid in next to me.
Sheriff Graves poked his head in. “I’ll ride up front with the driver … give you all some privacy on the way to the airport.”
“Wait, what? Airport?” I stared at Jack as the sheriff closed the door.
“Don’t be mad, okay?”
“I can promise you if you start any conversation with that phrase, it’s a racing certainty I will be. What the hell, Jack? Are you leaving already? I thought we were going to face this stuff together? It’s not fair you won’t be in Butler Cove if the Tom Price’s of the world start coming to harass us. They’ll only focus on me! Please don’t. And stop smiling. I’m serious as a damn heart attack right now.”
My heart pounded and my cheeks throbbed. But unlike what usually caused these crazy physical reactions in the presence of Jack, this time I was mad.
Jack’s smile broke free into a bellow of laughter.
Smacking his knee, I made to move across the vehicle to the bench seat.
He grabbed my wrist tightly.
“Let go,” I whined.
“No.” He laughed again. “Just let me explain.” He leaned forward and pressed a button. Then talked into the darkness. “Hey, can you drive around the island a few times? Our flight’s not scheduled for over an hour, and Keri Ann needs to get changed.”
“Sure thing,” came a voice. “Overtime?”
Jack smiled. “Of course.” He released the button then he turned on a dim sidelight so we could see each other better. At least, I assumed that’s why he did it. A John Legend song poured softly into the interior.
Smooth.
“Get changed?” I asked, belatedly recognizing a small duffel I’d bought for a camping trip to Hunting Island a few years back, sitting on the seat. “How did you get that?”
“Jazz might have been in on it …” He winced.
My mouth dropped open.
Wait. “Our flight?”
He nodded. “I wasn’t sure when the story was going to drop so I asked Jazz to help me in case you needed to get out of the spotlight at a moment’s notice.”
A fizz of nausea swirled low in my belly. “Where to? God, never mind. And what about them having to deal with it? Is this what you usually do? Of course it is. It’s how I met you. Is this what …” I swallowed. “I can’t just leave! Is this how we’ll have to be? How will I work, keep a job?”
Jack reached for my hand again, and I wrenched it free lurching away from him. “How will I go to school?” A strand of the dress caught and snapped, tiny jet beads poured down over my feet. “Shit.” I tried to grab the strand and stop them, making it worse. Tears pooled in my eyes.
“It’s okay, we’ll fix it.” Jack’s hand closed over mine where I held the dress. And he moved to the edge of the seat opposite me, spreading his knees and leaning forward.
“Okay,” he said gently. “Let go, I’ve got it.” His hands took over from mine and tied a small loop knot in the strand, stopping the flow of beads. Then he reached down to the floor between his feet and carefully picked them all up. I reached down to help. “I’ve got it,” he said again.
I watched him, looking at his bent head, his soft hair, his strong hands making sure he had every last one. I fought a battle with myself to reach out and touch him. I knew I was panicking again about being with him. I just couldn’t see what our relationship would look like.
“You can’t always swoop in and buy my art, you know.” I cleared my throat. “And if I can’t afford to go to school, or we lose the house, you can’t step in and save me. You know that, right?”
He sighed. “It’s just money, Keri Ann. Do you have any idea how much money I make? It’s meaningless unless I do something meaningful with it.”
“I can’t, I won’t owe you like that. We are not doing a repeat performance of that auction tonight, as fun as it was.”
“You have too much pride, you know that? And you wouldn’t be owing me. If you were my wife, for example, why would you owe me?”
The breath I was taking as he spoke stuttered and hiccupped in my chest. Shock flooded my system, making me lightheaded.
Jack continued picking up tiny beads. He transferred a handful into the inside breast pocket of his jacket.
I raised a trembling hand to my chest, putting my chin down. My flight response jumped to attention. We had to stop the car. He needed to take me home. My breathing picked up a panicked rate.
Then I felt his hand snake into the hair at my nape tilting my face up to look at him. “Just breathe, Keri Ann. It’s going to be okay. We’re going to figure it out. Take it one step at a time. But right now, until we know what the reaction to this story will be, we should go somewhere.” He brushed his thumb over my bottom lip then dropped his hands down. “And maybe it will be nothing. And maybe I just want to be alone with you.”
I stared into his deep, dark green eyes, my vision blurry. I needed to get back the feeling of calm I’d had earlier, when I felt such trust in him. I did trust him. I didn’t want to leave him. But God, be his wife? I blew out a slow shuddering breath. We’d need to talk about that. A lot. Way, way in the future.
He watched me, waiting for my reaction. He seemed to know he just freaked the hell out of me. And after an evening like the one we’d had, he couldn’t blame me. But God, I wanted this man. I wanted him to look at me the way he did, forever.
Giving in finally to the urge to touch him, I reached forward, sliding my hands through his hair.
He stilled, closing his eyes.
Then he exhaled slowly and reached for my calves, lightly running a hand over my skin. His fingers worked the small buckle of my silver sandals at each ankle, and then slipped each heel off my feet.
Moving up my calves, he gathered my beaded dress up past my knees. “Kneel down,” he murmured, leaning back and creating space between us. His eyes were dark, somewhat unsure. “Let me help you get your dress off.”
I did as he asked, kneeling between his dark suit-clad thighs, feeling the vibration of the car beneath me. He gingerly lifted the delicate beaded dress over my head leaving me in just the champagne-tone shift beneath and carefully laid the dress out on the long bench next to him.
My tears spilled over even while I smiled.
Jack’s concerned face furrowed further. “Shit. I’ve got whiplash. Are you happy or sad right now? Please help me out here.”
“God, both. I don’t know.” I laughed. “The things you do, the way you make me feel, it’s incredible. You set my worries and fears alight until I feel they’ll burn me alive. Then I find them floating away like sky lanterns. You asked me if I could be proud to be with you. It was never that I’m not proud of you. If anything it’s the other way around, most of the time I don’t understand why you want to be with me.” I hiccupped.
“How can you not know?” He looked at me earnestly. “That’s like asking why we breathe air. Because it’s the way we were made. I’m telling you, that’s how it is for me. The way I feel about you was never a decision. It just was. I was made to love you. I never fell, I was already there. From the very first moment.”
Jack laughed. “I wasn’t sure if I’d need room for your friends on the ride back.” He slid in next to me.
Sheriff Graves poked his head in. “I’ll ride up front with the driver … give you all some privacy on the way to the airport.”
“Wait, what? Airport?” I stared at Jack as the sheriff closed the door.
“Don’t be mad, okay?”
“I can promise you if you start any conversation with that phrase, it’s a racing certainty I will be. What the hell, Jack? Are you leaving already? I thought we were going to face this stuff together? It’s not fair you won’t be in Butler Cove if the Tom Price’s of the world start coming to harass us. They’ll only focus on me! Please don’t. And stop smiling. I’m serious as a damn heart attack right now.”
My heart pounded and my cheeks throbbed. But unlike what usually caused these crazy physical reactions in the presence of Jack, this time I was mad.
Jack’s smile broke free into a bellow of laughter.
Smacking his knee, I made to move across the vehicle to the bench seat.
He grabbed my wrist tightly.
“Let go,” I whined.
“No.” He laughed again. “Just let me explain.” He leaned forward and pressed a button. Then talked into the darkness. “Hey, can you drive around the island a few times? Our flight’s not scheduled for over an hour, and Keri Ann needs to get changed.”
“Sure thing,” came a voice. “Overtime?”
Jack smiled. “Of course.” He released the button then he turned on a dim sidelight so we could see each other better. At least, I assumed that’s why he did it. A John Legend song poured softly into the interior.
Smooth.
“Get changed?” I asked, belatedly recognizing a small duffel I’d bought for a camping trip to Hunting Island a few years back, sitting on the seat. “How did you get that?”
“Jazz might have been in on it …” He winced.
My mouth dropped open.
Wait. “Our flight?”
He nodded. “I wasn’t sure when the story was going to drop so I asked Jazz to help me in case you needed to get out of the spotlight at a moment’s notice.”
A fizz of nausea swirled low in my belly. “Where to? God, never mind. And what about them having to deal with it? Is this what you usually do? Of course it is. It’s how I met you. Is this what …” I swallowed. “I can’t just leave! Is this how we’ll have to be? How will I work, keep a job?”
Jack reached for my hand again, and I wrenched it free lurching away from him. “How will I go to school?” A strand of the dress caught and snapped, tiny jet beads poured down over my feet. “Shit.” I tried to grab the strand and stop them, making it worse. Tears pooled in my eyes.
“It’s okay, we’ll fix it.” Jack’s hand closed over mine where I held the dress. And he moved to the edge of the seat opposite me, spreading his knees and leaning forward.
“Okay,” he said gently. “Let go, I’ve got it.” His hands took over from mine and tied a small loop knot in the strand, stopping the flow of beads. Then he reached down to the floor between his feet and carefully picked them all up. I reached down to help. “I’ve got it,” he said again.
I watched him, looking at his bent head, his soft hair, his strong hands making sure he had every last one. I fought a battle with myself to reach out and touch him. I knew I was panicking again about being with him. I just couldn’t see what our relationship would look like.
“You can’t always swoop in and buy my art, you know.” I cleared my throat. “And if I can’t afford to go to school, or we lose the house, you can’t step in and save me. You know that, right?”
He sighed. “It’s just money, Keri Ann. Do you have any idea how much money I make? It’s meaningless unless I do something meaningful with it.”
“I can’t, I won’t owe you like that. We are not doing a repeat performance of that auction tonight, as fun as it was.”
“You have too much pride, you know that? And you wouldn’t be owing me. If you were my wife, for example, why would you owe me?”
The breath I was taking as he spoke stuttered and hiccupped in my chest. Shock flooded my system, making me lightheaded.
Jack continued picking up tiny beads. He transferred a handful into the inside breast pocket of his jacket.
I raised a trembling hand to my chest, putting my chin down. My flight response jumped to attention. We had to stop the car. He needed to take me home. My breathing picked up a panicked rate.
Then I felt his hand snake into the hair at my nape tilting my face up to look at him. “Just breathe, Keri Ann. It’s going to be okay. We’re going to figure it out. Take it one step at a time. But right now, until we know what the reaction to this story will be, we should go somewhere.” He brushed his thumb over my bottom lip then dropped his hands down. “And maybe it will be nothing. And maybe I just want to be alone with you.”
I stared into his deep, dark green eyes, my vision blurry. I needed to get back the feeling of calm I’d had earlier, when I felt such trust in him. I did trust him. I didn’t want to leave him. But God, be his wife? I blew out a slow shuddering breath. We’d need to talk about that. A lot. Way, way in the future.
He watched me, waiting for my reaction. He seemed to know he just freaked the hell out of me. And after an evening like the one we’d had, he couldn’t blame me. But God, I wanted this man. I wanted him to look at me the way he did, forever.
Giving in finally to the urge to touch him, I reached forward, sliding my hands through his hair.
He stilled, closing his eyes.
Then he exhaled slowly and reached for my calves, lightly running a hand over my skin. His fingers worked the small buckle of my silver sandals at each ankle, and then slipped each heel off my feet.
Moving up my calves, he gathered my beaded dress up past my knees. “Kneel down,” he murmured, leaning back and creating space between us. His eyes were dark, somewhat unsure. “Let me help you get your dress off.”
I did as he asked, kneeling between his dark suit-clad thighs, feeling the vibration of the car beneath me. He gingerly lifted the delicate beaded dress over my head leaving me in just the champagne-tone shift beneath and carefully laid the dress out on the long bench next to him.
My tears spilled over even while I smiled.
Jack’s concerned face furrowed further. “Shit. I’ve got whiplash. Are you happy or sad right now? Please help me out here.”
“God, both. I don’t know.” I laughed. “The things you do, the way you make me feel, it’s incredible. You set my worries and fears alight until I feel they’ll burn me alive. Then I find them floating away like sky lanterns. You asked me if I could be proud to be with you. It was never that I’m not proud of you. If anything it’s the other way around, most of the time I don’t understand why you want to be with me.” I hiccupped.
“How can you not know?” He looked at me earnestly. “That’s like asking why we breathe air. Because it’s the way we were made. I’m telling you, that’s how it is for me. The way I feel about you was never a decision. It just was. I was made to love you. I never fell, I was already there. From the very first moment.”
