Forged by Desire
Page 23
And so, when she’d finally escaped, she hadn’t gone home.
Knowing how much her father would grieve hurt her, but at least he was still alive to grieve. Her sisters were happily married, each with several children of their own. Nothing could change that. They were safe.
But was Garrett safe?
The truth was becoming clearer in her mind, solidifying with each detail.
She couldn’t stay.
Could she?
Perry groaned, raking her hands through her still-wet hair. The silence of the room was deafening, and Garrett’s words kept echoing in her head. Demanding more from her than she could give.
She didn’t realize she was moving until she was through the door. Damn it, what had the duke asked of him? She needed to know.
Night had fallen with economical grace as she made her way to his rooms. Too many random thoughts swirled through her head, but what beat in her chest was the steady, dooming beat of an executioner’s drum.
Perry rapped at his door with her knuckles, bruising them in her haste.
“Come in,” Garrett called.
A shiver of breathlessness ran through her. Her hands were shaking but somehow she managed to open the door.
And there he was.
Shirtless.
“Garrett.” Perry stopped on the threshold as if she’d been hit, staring at the na**d expanse of his back.
He’d been shaving. Lather still decorated one cheek and he held the blade poised against his skin, his eyes locking on her in the mirror in surprise. Water dripped down his bare chest in the reflection, gleaming on the muscles. He’d discarded his shirt haphazardly over a chair, and his leather pants fit him snugly enough for a part of her to ache.
She’d seen him in a state of undress before. But she’d not expected it now, and the shock stole all of the words she’d been thinking of. Perry could only stare.
It took a moment for him to recover too. He cursed under his breath as his hand slipped and a bright line of red sprang up against the lather. Holding his cheek taut, he scraped the blade down his cheek, his attention returning to his task. “What do you want?”
You.
Slowly she shut the door. “May I speak with you?”
“Only if you have something interesting to say.” Another stroke of the blade. His cheek was bare now and he angled his chin to shave beneath his jaw, wielding the blade with a dexterity she couldn’t take her eyes off of. Her gaze slid over the faint red line on his cheek. Healing now, but she could scent the blood in the air. Hunger burned in her throat.
“Something along the lines of what we spoke of today. Secrets, for example,” he continued. Flicking the last bit of lather from his jaw, he put the blade down and dabbed his face with a small wet towel. His skin was slightly pink and smooth, gleaming in the gaslight. Again he caught her looking at him in the mirror. “Otherwise, I have work to do. I planned on seeing what I could find out about—That’s right. That’s between the Duke of Moncrieff and myself. I know how much you like secrets.”
“Garrett—”
He tossed the towel aside and turned toward her. Gaslight cast alluring shadows over his body. She’d seen it before. Felt each hard line of it in that alley. But the reality of it left her unable to tear her gaze away, her br**sts aching and her sex growing damp with need.
“Now that’s not fair,” Garrett murmured. “No touching. No kissing. No looking at me like that, Perry.” Slowly he crossed his arms over his chest. The muscle in his biceps rippled and she knew he’d done it deliberately. “Otherwise we’d have to stop pretending these are games, wouldn’t we? We’d have to deal with the fact that things have changed between us. No going back. No pretending otherwise.”
“You were the one avoiding me,” she blurted.
His eyes were hot flame. “So this is punishment?”
“No.” She looked up at all that leashed fury and hunger, all of it just for her. If she didn’t take this chance there’d never be another. “Kiss me.” It was the only thing that made sense right now. The only thing she wanted to think about.
A moment of shock widened his blue eyes. Then they narrowed. “Make up your bloody mind.”
I’m frightened and I need you… All of that got lost on her tongue as she stepped toward him. Then her hands were on his face and she was reaching for him—or maybe he was reaching for her. Perry didn’t know. She was fracturing inside, splintering into a thousand little pieces, and then one of his hands slid up the nape of her neck, cradling her scalp, and the other locked around her waist. Holding her together. Their mouths met and it was everything she’d ever hoped for.
Real.
Not like one of the thousand dreams she’d had of this moment. This was real. Garrett was kissing her and she could feel how much he wanted her. How much she wanted him.
A kiss so long denied. A yearning so long held that she felt it quivering deep within her. His tongue met hers. Lashed over it. He was right; sometimes he wasn’t a gentleman. He was angry. She could feel it vibrating through the tense line of his shoulders. Perry dug her short nails into his back and he grabbed her wrists, forcing her back, back…
Her back hit the wall, but there was nowhere to go. Only him. Each hard inch pressed against her, his mouth devouring hers as he held her wrists pinned to the fine wallpaper.
And it wasn’t enough. It would never be enough. She bit him, teeth sinking into the flesh of his lower lip, hard enough to draw blood. The taste of it exploded on her tongue and then they were both tearing at each other, teeth and lips and tongues tangling in a sudden urge to drink the other in.
He slammed her back against the wall, one hand sliding under her arse. Perry locked her legs around his hips, feeling the hot grind of his erection right where she wanted it.
“Damn it,” he whispered, stealing a breath. His lips met hers on a groan that vibrated through his chest. “This is not—I’m not doing this. Not until you give me something, damn it—”
This was all she could give. The moment she’d seen him, she’d known she couldn’t stay. The Moncrieff had found her now and he wouldn’t back down. Nor would Garrett if he knew who she was. It hurt. That this could be the last night they had together. Perry kissed him, long and slow and hard, her hands sliding up to cup his cheeks. A quiver ran through his body and she rolled her hips, nudging against him, riding over the heated flesh digging into her hip. Yes. This. Now. One final good-bye.
Garrett sucked in a sharp breath. Then her hand was sliding down between them, the hard muscle of his stomach flinching beneath her exploring touch. Perry reached the edge of his waistband before he moved, capturing her wrist and shaking his head.
“No,” he gasped, his eyes glassy with desire—and something else. She saw shadows there, stealing through his irises, sweeping away the beautiful blue. Fierce need. “Perry, I have to be in control.” Another shudder went through him. “I need to be.”
Perry slid down his body as he stepped back, her boots hitting the floor. What was he doing? Her eyes flared wide. He couldn’t be saying no. Not to this. Not now.
But he caught her h*ps and then he was turning her, her hands hitting the wallpaper. Pressing her hard against it, until her forehead rested against the embossed green-and-gold print and her breath wet her lips.
“Fuck,” he whispered, pinning her there. “You come to me like this? After today?”
“I could go,” she threw back over her shoulder, her eyes meeting his for one strained moment.
“You would, wouldn’t you?” Something in his eyes darkened. “Too late for that, love.”
Garrett’s hands slid over her h*ps and tugged her belt open even as he pressed her against the wall. She was pinned by his weight, by the strength in his hard body. A delicious shiver went through her.
Fingers slid into her hair, knotting around it until he drew her head back. His other hand deftly dealt with the buttons on her trousers. Perry gasped.
“You don’t get to say no anymore.” He bit her neck, then suckled at the skin. The shock of it echoed through her, reminding her of other hungers. This wasn’t the first time a blue blood had taken her blood. And she’d liked it once, perhaps too much. The ache in her ni**les intensified.
“You don’t get to pretend this isn’t happening.” Fingers skating lower, over her hip. Down. Finding the slit in her drawers.
His fingers found her, hot and wet and wanting. They paused for a moment as if surprised at something, then whispered over her flesh with long, slow strokes that stole the breath from her lungs. Perry groaned, rotating her hips, wanting more.
“You don’t know how much I want to be inside you,” he whispered. One teasing fingertip delved into her, then out again, dancing over her sex. “Fucking my way into you. Nice and slow. Until you’re begging me for more.”
He was going slowly enough to kill her. Perry slid her hand over his with a gasp, pressed it harder. More. She wanted more.
One hand wrapped around her throat. Curling her back into his body, her head thrown back against his shoulder. Trapped there as he wrought delicious damage on her.
“Yes,” he whispered against her ear. “Right there?”
Perry bit her lip, trapping a moan. Her body spasmed as his finger rubbed over that one special spot. Again. And again. Destroying her. Tightening every nerve in her body until she was quivering. If he hadn’t been holding her up, she would have fallen.
Her short nails raked the embossed figures on the wallpaper. Please. Don’t stop. But his fingers were slowing, slowing, tracing teasing little circles that left her grinding against him, desperate for more.
“Everything has changed,” he whispered, his hot breath on her sensitive neck. Lips brushed against her skin, the graze of teeth. “Admit it, damn you. Everything changed. And you wanted it to. That’s why you wore that bloody dress at the opera. You wanted this.”
“Yes.” The plea burned over her lips. The only truth she could ever give him.
A muscled thigh slid between hers, spreading her legs. “You want me.”
Perry shook her head, quivering on the edge of ecstasy.
“Say it,” he hissed, one finger broaching the wet heat of her body. Then two. Filling her. Stretching her. He stopped moving, both fingers buried deep within her. Leaving her on the edge. Waiting.
“I want you,” she whispered. “Please…please don’t stop.”
“I don’t intend to.” His thumb caressed the center of all that feeling, and the edge crumpled beneath her feet.
One touch to fling her into the heart of all that sensation. One touch to break her. Perry cried out, pressing her trembling forehead against the wallpaper and leaning on it. Oh God… A sob caught on her breath. She barely felt him tugging her around, pressing her back against the wall. Perry looked up, her vision glazing.
Another long, slow, drugging kiss. Her shaking hands slid up over his shoulders tentatively. Muscle tensed beneath her touch and he drew back just enough to look at her. His eyes were black as night, the muscle in his jaw locked tight. “But I won’t let you lock me out. Not again. If you want this—want me—then you’re going to have to damned well tell me a few things.”
Her heart punched behind her ribs and he saw it on her face.
Garrett’s expression darkened, one finger pressing against her lips. “Either you talk to me, or things don’t go any further.” He caught her other hand and slid it lower. Over the thick bulge straining behind his pants. “You want this?” His h*ps thrust against her touch, rubbing the entire length of his c**k against her hand. The expression on his face lost its focus, just for a moment, then tightened again. “Then you have to let me in. I won’t settle for less.”
Garrett took her hand away. Wouldn’t let her reach for him. “No.”
Hands tugged at her pants. He was doing up her buttons. Sliding her belt back into place. One last tug to notch it tight. The ache between her thighs intensified. Unfulfilled.
Perry’s lips stung. She licked them, trying to work out what was going on. “Garrett?”
“Tomorrow,” he said firmly, drawing away from her. “I’ll give you tonight to think, but tomorrow we’re going to talk. I’m tired of all the secrets between us at the moment. Aren’t you?”
Perry’s heart curled into a small tight ball in her chest. There would be no tomorrow. Tonight was meant to be good-bye. She slid her hand over his jaw, stepping closer, but he turned away and her lips met the smooth skin of his cheek instead. A gentle rebuff. Don’t… Let me have this one night with you. Please.
But he was turning away, holding the door open for her. Like a gentleman. The idea of that almost brought a pained smile to her lips. After everything he’d just done to her, she knew he was no gentleman. Not underneath the smooth, cultured cravats and coats he wore. Like the clothes he wore, the cultured veneer was just that…a veneer.
Perry darted inside his guard and pressed her lips to his in a chaste, gentle kiss that lingered. She never wanted it to end, but then his hand was stroking her face, subtle signs of his body withdrawing from her.
“Remember that,” Perry whispered as she backed through his door.
She would.
***
The door closed and Garrett splayed his fingers wide against the timber, letting out the breath he’d been holding. The scent of her perfume lingered, a ghostly fragrance that haunted him. Reminding him of what they’d just done. Of how he’d forced himself to let her go.
And if the scent of her was difficult to forget, the throbbing of his c**k was just another reminder. He could have had her. Should have. He’d seen the look in her eyes as she left. Perry was gathering her wits together, and he preferred her off-balance. If he gave her too much time to think, he was afraid she’d only find some other excuse to shove between them.
Knowing how much her father would grieve hurt her, but at least he was still alive to grieve. Her sisters were happily married, each with several children of their own. Nothing could change that. They were safe.
But was Garrett safe?
The truth was becoming clearer in her mind, solidifying with each detail.
She couldn’t stay.
Could she?
Perry groaned, raking her hands through her still-wet hair. The silence of the room was deafening, and Garrett’s words kept echoing in her head. Demanding more from her than she could give.
She didn’t realize she was moving until she was through the door. Damn it, what had the duke asked of him? She needed to know.
Night had fallen with economical grace as she made her way to his rooms. Too many random thoughts swirled through her head, but what beat in her chest was the steady, dooming beat of an executioner’s drum.
Perry rapped at his door with her knuckles, bruising them in her haste.
“Come in,” Garrett called.
A shiver of breathlessness ran through her. Her hands were shaking but somehow she managed to open the door.
And there he was.
Shirtless.
“Garrett.” Perry stopped on the threshold as if she’d been hit, staring at the na**d expanse of his back.
He’d been shaving. Lather still decorated one cheek and he held the blade poised against his skin, his eyes locking on her in the mirror in surprise. Water dripped down his bare chest in the reflection, gleaming on the muscles. He’d discarded his shirt haphazardly over a chair, and his leather pants fit him snugly enough for a part of her to ache.
She’d seen him in a state of undress before. But she’d not expected it now, and the shock stole all of the words she’d been thinking of. Perry could only stare.
It took a moment for him to recover too. He cursed under his breath as his hand slipped and a bright line of red sprang up against the lather. Holding his cheek taut, he scraped the blade down his cheek, his attention returning to his task. “What do you want?”
You.
Slowly she shut the door. “May I speak with you?”
“Only if you have something interesting to say.” Another stroke of the blade. His cheek was bare now and he angled his chin to shave beneath his jaw, wielding the blade with a dexterity she couldn’t take her eyes off of. Her gaze slid over the faint red line on his cheek. Healing now, but she could scent the blood in the air. Hunger burned in her throat.
“Something along the lines of what we spoke of today. Secrets, for example,” he continued. Flicking the last bit of lather from his jaw, he put the blade down and dabbed his face with a small wet towel. His skin was slightly pink and smooth, gleaming in the gaslight. Again he caught her looking at him in the mirror. “Otherwise, I have work to do. I planned on seeing what I could find out about—That’s right. That’s between the Duke of Moncrieff and myself. I know how much you like secrets.”
“Garrett—”
He tossed the towel aside and turned toward her. Gaslight cast alluring shadows over his body. She’d seen it before. Felt each hard line of it in that alley. But the reality of it left her unable to tear her gaze away, her br**sts aching and her sex growing damp with need.
“Now that’s not fair,” Garrett murmured. “No touching. No kissing. No looking at me like that, Perry.” Slowly he crossed his arms over his chest. The muscle in his biceps rippled and she knew he’d done it deliberately. “Otherwise we’d have to stop pretending these are games, wouldn’t we? We’d have to deal with the fact that things have changed between us. No going back. No pretending otherwise.”
“You were the one avoiding me,” she blurted.
His eyes were hot flame. “So this is punishment?”
“No.” She looked up at all that leashed fury and hunger, all of it just for her. If she didn’t take this chance there’d never be another. “Kiss me.” It was the only thing that made sense right now. The only thing she wanted to think about.
A moment of shock widened his blue eyes. Then they narrowed. “Make up your bloody mind.”
I’m frightened and I need you… All of that got lost on her tongue as she stepped toward him. Then her hands were on his face and she was reaching for him—or maybe he was reaching for her. Perry didn’t know. She was fracturing inside, splintering into a thousand little pieces, and then one of his hands slid up the nape of her neck, cradling her scalp, and the other locked around her waist. Holding her together. Their mouths met and it was everything she’d ever hoped for.
Real.
Not like one of the thousand dreams she’d had of this moment. This was real. Garrett was kissing her and she could feel how much he wanted her. How much she wanted him.
A kiss so long denied. A yearning so long held that she felt it quivering deep within her. His tongue met hers. Lashed over it. He was right; sometimes he wasn’t a gentleman. He was angry. She could feel it vibrating through the tense line of his shoulders. Perry dug her short nails into his back and he grabbed her wrists, forcing her back, back…
Her back hit the wall, but there was nowhere to go. Only him. Each hard inch pressed against her, his mouth devouring hers as he held her wrists pinned to the fine wallpaper.
And it wasn’t enough. It would never be enough. She bit him, teeth sinking into the flesh of his lower lip, hard enough to draw blood. The taste of it exploded on her tongue and then they were both tearing at each other, teeth and lips and tongues tangling in a sudden urge to drink the other in.
He slammed her back against the wall, one hand sliding under her arse. Perry locked her legs around his hips, feeling the hot grind of his erection right where she wanted it.
“Damn it,” he whispered, stealing a breath. His lips met hers on a groan that vibrated through his chest. “This is not—I’m not doing this. Not until you give me something, damn it—”
This was all she could give. The moment she’d seen him, she’d known she couldn’t stay. The Moncrieff had found her now and he wouldn’t back down. Nor would Garrett if he knew who she was. It hurt. That this could be the last night they had together. Perry kissed him, long and slow and hard, her hands sliding up to cup his cheeks. A quiver ran through his body and she rolled her hips, nudging against him, riding over the heated flesh digging into her hip. Yes. This. Now. One final good-bye.
Garrett sucked in a sharp breath. Then her hand was sliding down between them, the hard muscle of his stomach flinching beneath her exploring touch. Perry reached the edge of his waistband before he moved, capturing her wrist and shaking his head.
“No,” he gasped, his eyes glassy with desire—and something else. She saw shadows there, stealing through his irises, sweeping away the beautiful blue. Fierce need. “Perry, I have to be in control.” Another shudder went through him. “I need to be.”
Perry slid down his body as he stepped back, her boots hitting the floor. What was he doing? Her eyes flared wide. He couldn’t be saying no. Not to this. Not now.
But he caught her h*ps and then he was turning her, her hands hitting the wallpaper. Pressing her hard against it, until her forehead rested against the embossed green-and-gold print and her breath wet her lips.
“Fuck,” he whispered, pinning her there. “You come to me like this? After today?”
“I could go,” she threw back over her shoulder, her eyes meeting his for one strained moment.
“You would, wouldn’t you?” Something in his eyes darkened. “Too late for that, love.”
Garrett’s hands slid over her h*ps and tugged her belt open even as he pressed her against the wall. She was pinned by his weight, by the strength in his hard body. A delicious shiver went through her.
Fingers slid into her hair, knotting around it until he drew her head back. His other hand deftly dealt with the buttons on her trousers. Perry gasped.
“You don’t get to say no anymore.” He bit her neck, then suckled at the skin. The shock of it echoed through her, reminding her of other hungers. This wasn’t the first time a blue blood had taken her blood. And she’d liked it once, perhaps too much. The ache in her ni**les intensified.
“You don’t get to pretend this isn’t happening.” Fingers skating lower, over her hip. Down. Finding the slit in her drawers.
His fingers found her, hot and wet and wanting. They paused for a moment as if surprised at something, then whispered over her flesh with long, slow strokes that stole the breath from her lungs. Perry groaned, rotating her hips, wanting more.
“You don’t know how much I want to be inside you,” he whispered. One teasing fingertip delved into her, then out again, dancing over her sex. “Fucking my way into you. Nice and slow. Until you’re begging me for more.”
He was going slowly enough to kill her. Perry slid her hand over his with a gasp, pressed it harder. More. She wanted more.
One hand wrapped around her throat. Curling her back into his body, her head thrown back against his shoulder. Trapped there as he wrought delicious damage on her.
“Yes,” he whispered against her ear. “Right there?”
Perry bit her lip, trapping a moan. Her body spasmed as his finger rubbed over that one special spot. Again. And again. Destroying her. Tightening every nerve in her body until she was quivering. If he hadn’t been holding her up, she would have fallen.
Her short nails raked the embossed figures on the wallpaper. Please. Don’t stop. But his fingers were slowing, slowing, tracing teasing little circles that left her grinding against him, desperate for more.
“Everything has changed,” he whispered, his hot breath on her sensitive neck. Lips brushed against her skin, the graze of teeth. “Admit it, damn you. Everything changed. And you wanted it to. That’s why you wore that bloody dress at the opera. You wanted this.”
“Yes.” The plea burned over her lips. The only truth she could ever give him.
A muscled thigh slid between hers, spreading her legs. “You want me.”
Perry shook her head, quivering on the edge of ecstasy.
“Say it,” he hissed, one finger broaching the wet heat of her body. Then two. Filling her. Stretching her. He stopped moving, both fingers buried deep within her. Leaving her on the edge. Waiting.
“I want you,” she whispered. “Please…please don’t stop.”
“I don’t intend to.” His thumb caressed the center of all that feeling, and the edge crumpled beneath her feet.
One touch to fling her into the heart of all that sensation. One touch to break her. Perry cried out, pressing her trembling forehead against the wallpaper and leaning on it. Oh God… A sob caught on her breath. She barely felt him tugging her around, pressing her back against the wall. Perry looked up, her vision glazing.
Another long, slow, drugging kiss. Her shaking hands slid up over his shoulders tentatively. Muscle tensed beneath her touch and he drew back just enough to look at her. His eyes were black as night, the muscle in his jaw locked tight. “But I won’t let you lock me out. Not again. If you want this—want me—then you’re going to have to damned well tell me a few things.”
Her heart punched behind her ribs and he saw it on her face.
Garrett’s expression darkened, one finger pressing against her lips. “Either you talk to me, or things don’t go any further.” He caught her other hand and slid it lower. Over the thick bulge straining behind his pants. “You want this?” His h*ps thrust against her touch, rubbing the entire length of his c**k against her hand. The expression on his face lost its focus, just for a moment, then tightened again. “Then you have to let me in. I won’t settle for less.”
Garrett took her hand away. Wouldn’t let her reach for him. “No.”
Hands tugged at her pants. He was doing up her buttons. Sliding her belt back into place. One last tug to notch it tight. The ache between her thighs intensified. Unfulfilled.
Perry’s lips stung. She licked them, trying to work out what was going on. “Garrett?”
“Tomorrow,” he said firmly, drawing away from her. “I’ll give you tonight to think, but tomorrow we’re going to talk. I’m tired of all the secrets between us at the moment. Aren’t you?”
Perry’s heart curled into a small tight ball in her chest. There would be no tomorrow. Tonight was meant to be good-bye. She slid her hand over his jaw, stepping closer, but he turned away and her lips met the smooth skin of his cheek instead. A gentle rebuff. Don’t… Let me have this one night with you. Please.
But he was turning away, holding the door open for her. Like a gentleman. The idea of that almost brought a pained smile to her lips. After everything he’d just done to her, she knew he was no gentleman. Not underneath the smooth, cultured cravats and coats he wore. Like the clothes he wore, the cultured veneer was just that…a veneer.
Perry darted inside his guard and pressed her lips to his in a chaste, gentle kiss that lingered. She never wanted it to end, but then his hand was stroking her face, subtle signs of his body withdrawing from her.
“Remember that,” Perry whispered as she backed through his door.
She would.
***
The door closed and Garrett splayed his fingers wide against the timber, letting out the breath he’d been holding. The scent of her perfume lingered, a ghostly fragrance that haunted him. Reminding him of what they’d just done. Of how he’d forced himself to let her go.
And if the scent of her was difficult to forget, the throbbing of his c**k was just another reminder. He could have had her. Should have. He’d seen the look in her eyes as she left. Perry was gathering her wits together, and he preferred her off-balance. If he gave her too much time to think, he was afraid she’d only find some other excuse to shove between them.
