Fragile Eternity
Page 77
She felt her hope and his joy spread like a tempest through their court. Flowers blossomed everywhere they touched the earth. This was what theyd lacked: the promise of happiness.It can be enough. It has to be. Then, the world spun away, or maybe they were the ones spinning. She wasnt sure. Summer Girls twirled by, blurs of vibrant green against shades of copper and mahogany skin as their flowering vines slithered over their barely clad bodies, and for an unexpected moment, Aislinn didnt like how close they were to Keenan.
I have no right.
He pulled back only for a breath and whispered, Tell me when to let go.
Dont let me fall. She held tighter. Save me.
Youve never needed saving, Aislinn. Keenan, her friend, her king, held on to her as the Summer Court danced dizzily around them, like spirals radiating out from their combined sunlight. You still dont.
It feels like I do. She felt tears slipping down her cheeks; as they moved in ever-faster turns, she saw the violets spring from the soil where those tears splashed to the ground. I feel likeI feel like Im missing a part of me.
Would you feel that way if His words faded away.
If it were you who left me? Her voice was as soft as she could make it.
It was selfish to ask. Forgive
I would, she whispered. She closed her eyes against the tearsor maybe against the confusing emotions on his face. They matched the tumultuous feelings inside her. Even with her eyes closed, she knew that she was safe as she moved at impossible speeds through the crowd. Keenan had her in his arms, and he wouldnt let her fall.
If Id met him before SethShe hadnt, though.
Aislinn kept her face against his chest and told him, I want to be sorry that youre apart from Donia, but Im not.
Keenan didnt comment on bringing the subject up just then. Ive only truly loved a couple of times, Aislinn. I want to try loving you.
You shouldnt lo Her words froze on her lips.
That would be a lie, my Queen. His voice was gentle, even as he rebuked her. One hundred eighty days, Aislinn. Seths been gone for one hundred eighty days, and Ive watched you try to pretend it doesnt hurt for every one of them. Cant I try to make you happy?
For the court.
No, he corrected. For you and for me. I miss your smiles. I waited for centuries to find my queen. Can we try this? Now that hes
left me, she finished. She caught his gaze, let herself forget that there was anyone else around, and stood still. The faeries spun around them. It was just them in the center of a maelstrom. Yes. Make me forget everything but right now. Thats what the Summer Court isnot logic, not addiction, not war, not calm or cold. Make me warm. Make me not think. Make me anything but this.
He didnt answer; he just kissed her again. It was still like swallowing sunshine, and she didnt resist. Her own skin began to glow until any faeries not of their court wouldve had to turn their faces away.
There was earth under their feet, but she didnt feel it. She didnt feel anything but sunlight chasing away everything that hurt inside of her. They moved through the park, flowers blossoming at their feet. She could taste the sunlight like warm honey on Keenans lips.
Like every other revelry, she felt drunk on the dance and night. This time though, when morning came, her feet werent touching the ground. She was in Keenans arms, carried from the park and from their court to the side of the river where theyd been after the first faire. There was no picnic, no carefully planned seduction. It was just them along the riverbank.
When they had their monthly revels, they werent sensible, but they also werent vulnerable. Even War herself wouldnt cross them tonight.
Aislinn stayed in his arms when he sat down alongside the river. The cool water rolled over her feet and calves, like tiny electric pulses on her skin. It balanced the warm earth that they sank into as their combined sunlight turned soil into slick mud. And she shiveredas much from the rivers touch as from Keenans.
Some stray thought whispered that she was on the ground in a formal dress, but she was Summerfrivolity, impulsivity, warmth.Its what I am. With him now.
Tell me when to let go, Keenan reminded her again.
Dont let go, Aislinn insisted. Talk to me. Tell me what you feel. Tell me everything you dont want to admit.
He grinned. No.
Treat me like a faery queen then.
How so?
She sat up and knelt beside him.
He stayed where he was, resting on the muddy bank, watching her.
Aislinn thought about the day they stood in the street and hed let sunlight fall onto her like raindrops. Like so many other things since becoming Summer Queen, she understood now how to do that, but shed not been able to experiment before. Like this.
Every pleasure under the sun was hidden in the droplets of sunlight that fell from her skin to his. Faery magic was what she wanted to share with him. It was what she was now, and she didnt have to worry that she would hurt him as she would a mortal.
If Seth werent human
But if he hadnt been human, shed never have had his friendship or love. If shed still been human, she wouldnt have lost it either. But Keenan wasnt human, and neither was she.
Not now, not ever again.
She caught Keenans gaze and gave him the words hed given her: I want to try loving you.Make me love you, Keenan. Youve convinced so many others. Convince me. Seduce me so I dont have to hurt anymore.
She leaned toward him, but Keenan stopped her. He shook his head.
Thishe gestured between themisnt love. Its something else.
I have no right.
He pulled back only for a breath and whispered, Tell me when to let go.
Dont let me fall. She held tighter. Save me.
Youve never needed saving, Aislinn. Keenan, her friend, her king, held on to her as the Summer Court danced dizzily around them, like spirals radiating out from their combined sunlight. You still dont.
It feels like I do. She felt tears slipping down her cheeks; as they moved in ever-faster turns, she saw the violets spring from the soil where those tears splashed to the ground. I feel likeI feel like Im missing a part of me.
Would you feel that way if His words faded away.
If it were you who left me? Her voice was as soft as she could make it.
It was selfish to ask. Forgive
I would, she whispered. She closed her eyes against the tearsor maybe against the confusing emotions on his face. They matched the tumultuous feelings inside her. Even with her eyes closed, she knew that she was safe as she moved at impossible speeds through the crowd. Keenan had her in his arms, and he wouldnt let her fall.
If Id met him before SethShe hadnt, though.
Aislinn kept her face against his chest and told him, I want to be sorry that youre apart from Donia, but Im not.
Keenan didnt comment on bringing the subject up just then. Ive only truly loved a couple of times, Aislinn. I want to try loving you.
You shouldnt lo Her words froze on her lips.
That would be a lie, my Queen. His voice was gentle, even as he rebuked her. One hundred eighty days, Aislinn. Seths been gone for one hundred eighty days, and Ive watched you try to pretend it doesnt hurt for every one of them. Cant I try to make you happy?
For the court.
No, he corrected. For you and for me. I miss your smiles. I waited for centuries to find my queen. Can we try this? Now that hes
left me, she finished. She caught his gaze, let herself forget that there was anyone else around, and stood still. The faeries spun around them. It was just them in the center of a maelstrom. Yes. Make me forget everything but right now. Thats what the Summer Court isnot logic, not addiction, not war, not calm or cold. Make me warm. Make me not think. Make me anything but this.
He didnt answer; he just kissed her again. It was still like swallowing sunshine, and she didnt resist. Her own skin began to glow until any faeries not of their court wouldve had to turn their faces away.
There was earth under their feet, but she didnt feel it. She didnt feel anything but sunlight chasing away everything that hurt inside of her. They moved through the park, flowers blossoming at their feet. She could taste the sunlight like warm honey on Keenans lips.
Like every other revelry, she felt drunk on the dance and night. This time though, when morning came, her feet werent touching the ground. She was in Keenans arms, carried from the park and from their court to the side of the river where theyd been after the first faire. There was no picnic, no carefully planned seduction. It was just them along the riverbank.
When they had their monthly revels, they werent sensible, but they also werent vulnerable. Even War herself wouldnt cross them tonight.
Aislinn stayed in his arms when he sat down alongside the river. The cool water rolled over her feet and calves, like tiny electric pulses on her skin. It balanced the warm earth that they sank into as their combined sunlight turned soil into slick mud. And she shiveredas much from the rivers touch as from Keenans.
Some stray thought whispered that she was on the ground in a formal dress, but she was Summerfrivolity, impulsivity, warmth.Its what I am. With him now.
Tell me when to let go, Keenan reminded her again.
Dont let go, Aislinn insisted. Talk to me. Tell me what you feel. Tell me everything you dont want to admit.
He grinned. No.
Treat me like a faery queen then.
How so?
She sat up and knelt beside him.
He stayed where he was, resting on the muddy bank, watching her.
Aislinn thought about the day they stood in the street and hed let sunlight fall onto her like raindrops. Like so many other things since becoming Summer Queen, she understood now how to do that, but shed not been able to experiment before. Like this.
Every pleasure under the sun was hidden in the droplets of sunlight that fell from her skin to his. Faery magic was what she wanted to share with him. It was what she was now, and she didnt have to worry that she would hurt him as she would a mortal.
If Seth werent human
But if he hadnt been human, shed never have had his friendship or love. If shed still been human, she wouldnt have lost it either. But Keenan wasnt human, and neither was she.
Not now, not ever again.
She caught Keenans gaze and gave him the words hed given her: I want to try loving you.Make me love you, Keenan. Youve convinced so many others. Convince me. Seduce me so I dont have to hurt anymore.
She leaned toward him, but Keenan stopped her. He shook his head.
Thishe gestured between themisnt love. Its something else.
