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“And then you met me.” He gives a satisfied grin and I laugh.
“You seem to think quite highly of yourself.”
“I got the hottest tat artist in California sitting in my lap. She’s got the biggest heart and the most beautiful face, and hell, when she gets going, you should hear her sass. Guy like me with a girl like you, yeah, that’s worth a smile.”
For a single irrational moment, I am insanely jealous of his wife. She didn’t just have his smile; she had his heart, and if they hadn’t suffered a tragedy, she would have had it forever.
“You know why I like you?” I stroke his cheek, rough with a five o’clock shadow. “Aside from the fact that you’re hot, sexy, an amazing fighter, always there for me, understanding, and good in bed?”
He lifts an eyebrow. “I’m waitin’ to hear more.”
“You’re everything I ever wanted a man to be.”
Ray kisses my forehead and chuckles. “And here I thought it was just about the sex.”
Not anymore.
“He live around here?”
My brow creases in a frown when the rumble of Ray’s voice pulls me out of my thoughts. “Who?”
“The bastard who raped you.”
My heart quickens, and I will him not to be thinking what I’m pretty sure he is thinking. “He did, but then he disappeared. Tag tried to find him. He wanted to keep tabs on him just for my peace of mind, but even with all his resources, he couldn’t track him down. We figured he must have left the state.”
“Walking the streets like he has a right to be anywhere but jail?” His voice rises to a threatening growl.
“Ray…”
“Who is he? Gimme a name.”
Stomach churning, I push myself up to sitting and shake my head. “It’s finished, Ray. I made my choice and I’ve moved on. Don’t think I haven’t been through this already with Tag. I just want to live my life like it never happened.”
“But it did.” He cups my jaw in his broad hand and tilts my head back, forcing me to meet his gaze. “And you’re not living life like it never happened because you’ve locked part of yourself away.”
“Except with you,” I whisper. “Because you make me feel safe.”
A pained expression crosses his face. “You should feel safe every fucking day of your life. You and Tag should have justice. I got the resources to make that happen.”
Dread claws its way through my belly and I wrench myself away. “Justice isn’t going to change the past.”
“Maybe not. But it can give you a better future.”
My hand clenches into a fist against his chest. “Please, Ray. I didn’t tell you because it was a problem that needed to be fixed. I told you because I wanted you to understand why I am the way I am and why I do some of the things I do. I wanted to share my past with you but not to get you involved.”
“I am involved.” His voice tightens. “And you should know by now I’m not the kind of man to let something like this go. You’ll have justice, Sia. I promise you that.”
Chapter 17
You can’t protect me from everything
Tag is released from the hospital the next morning and decides to hide out at my apartment to avoid Mom chasing him down while he’s on sick leave. He watches TV beside me on the couch and grumbles about how he can never show his face at Redemption again. I pull out my sketch pad and start to draw.
“You doing up a stencil for someone’s tat?” He rests his feet on my glass coffee table, then lowers them when I raise an admonishing eyebrow.
“No. I just…wanted to draw.”
He nods at my dining room table, still set up with my easel and the half-finished painting from Ray’s visit. “Like you just wanted to paint?”
My cheeks burn and I shrug. “Yeah. Ray was here the other night and he opened my closet and everything fell out. He asked me to paint something for him.” My throat tightens with emotion. “It had been so long…and… Oh God, Tag, it felt so good.”
His face softens. “I’m happy for you, Sis. I missed your art. I mean, I see your tats on the guys at the gym, but it isn’t the same.”
Holding up the sketch pad, I flip through the pictures. “I started drawing too. Every spare minute.”
He looks at the pictures and laughs. “I see a common theme. Are they all of Ray fighting in the ring because he’s the one who opened the door?”
“I love watching him fight. He’s so confident in the ring. So utterly competent and in control. I used to watch him and wish I could feel like that.”
Tag’s smile broadens. “You ever want to learn to fight, just let me know. I’m your man. Starter class is called Get Fit or Die and even though you’re my sis, I’ll show you no mercy. Love that class. Love running the newbies into the ground.”
“So does that mean you’re going back to Redemption after all?”
Tag leans over and ruffles my hair. “If you’re gonna learn how to fight, I’m gonna be there.”
For a moment I feel like I’ve got my old Tag back. The lines are gone from his forehead and he hasn’t mentioned his case since he left the hospital. I lean into his shoulder and sigh. “I guess we’ve got a deal.”
* * *
Tuesday morning I walk into the studio with a happy smile only to discover our time in paradise is almost over.