Goddess of Spring

Chapter 24

The women watched silently as the Lord of the Dead carried their Goddess into his palace. Though the God's face was grim, Persephone's arms were wrapped securely around his broad shoulders and her face was pressed into his neck. Relief passed through the spirits. She would be herself again. The God's love assured them of that. Like wind sloughing through wil ow branches they murmured softly to one another and departed the palace grounds.
"Eurydice!" Hades bel owed as he entered the palace. The spirit materialized instantly with Iapis at her side. "Draw the Goddess a bath. Make it very hot."
"Yes, Lord," she said and disappeared.
Iapis kept pace with Hades. "What can I do?"
"Go to Bacchus. Tel him I must have his most potent wine. Something to soothe the soul of a goddess." Hades said.
"I wil , Lord." Before Iapis disappeared he touched Persephone's head. "Be wel , Goddess," he whispered, and was gone.
Hades carried Persephone quickly to her chamber. Fragrant steam was already escaping from the bathing room and Hades entered the moist fog to find Eurydice hurrying around, pul ing thick towels from shelves and choosing soft, plump sponges.
There was a wel -cushioned chair near the mirrored wal . Reluctantly, Hades placed Persephone in it. Her arms slid lifelessly from around his shoulders and she sat very stil . Her eyes were closed. Hades knelt beside her.
"Persephone, you are home now," he said.
A tremor passed through her body.
"Beloved, can you hear me?"
She opened her eyes and looked at him.
"I can hear you." Her voice was flat and expressionless.
"Do you know where you are?" he asked.
"I'm at your palace."
"Yes," he smiled encouragement, ignoring the dead sound of her voice. Iapis materialized in the room. He held a crystal bottle of ruby-colored wine and a matching goblet. He poured the wine and an intoxicating scent drifted from the glass. It smel ed of grapes and meadows, of ripened wheat and summer nights under the full moon.
Iapis offered the goblet to Persephone. "Drink, Goddess. It wil revive you." She tried to hold the glass, but her hand was trembling so violently that she almost dropped it. Hades wrapped his hand around hers, guiding the wine to her lips. She drank deeply. The magic of the immortals' wine began warming her almost instantly. Soon, the trembling in her hands subsided so that she could drink without the God's help.
"Go, now," Eurydice said, taking charge. "The Goddess needs her privacy to bathe." Hades stood, but hesitated to leave the room.
"My Lord, I wil cal you when she is ready," Eurydice assured him. Stil Hades hesitated. "Persephone, I wil not be far away." The Goddess looked up. "You don't need to worry. I'm back now," she told him. Even though her voice was expressionless, Hades nodded and he and Iapis reluctantly left the room.
Hades paced in the hal way outside her chamber. How long did it take to bathe? Would the spirit never cal him? He wanted to thrust open the door and order Eurydice from the room. Then he would make Persephone listen to him. She had to hear his apology. He was a stupid, inexperienced, jealous fool. Hades sighed. She knew him. It shouldn't be difficult to get her to believe that he had blundered into such a terrible mistake.
The door opened and Eurydice stepped into the hal . She closed the door gently behind her.
"How is she?" Hades asked.
Eurydice looked up at the God, searching his face before she answered him. When she did she sounded much older than her years.
"She is sad, Lord."
Hades raked his hand through his hair. "I have caused this."
"Yes, you have," she said simply.
Hades nodded tightly and turned to the door. Eurydice's pale hand halted him.
"Be patient. Treat her carefully. It's hard for a woman to love again after she has been hurt." Iapis materialized beside Eurydice. He slid his arm around her and the little spirit leaned into him.
"It's hard for a woman to love again after she had been hurt, but it is possible, Lord," the daimon told his god.
Hades watched them walk slowly away. They fit wel together. He turned back to the door, took a deep breath and entered Persephone's chamber.
The Goddess was wearing a sheer silk chemise the color of candlelight. She was curled up on a chaise that sat in front of the wal of windows. Part of the velvet drapes had been pul ed back and Persephone seemed to be studying the night-cloaked gardens while sipping Bacchus' wine.
"Your gardens real y are very beautiful," she spoke without looking at him. He crossed the room and stood beside her chaise.
"Thank you. I am glad..." His words faded. He didn't want to make inconsequential conversation with her. Eurydice had warned him to be patient and careful, and he would. But he must also speak his heart to her. He sat beside her on the chaise.
"Please forgive me. I am a fool," he said.
She turned to face him.
"I knew you were going to leave me, so I wanted to break with you first. I thought it might save me pain. I thought I could go back to how it was before I loved you. I was wrong. I was selfish. I did not think of your feelings. Like an aging, solitary monster, I thought only of myself." Lina put up her hand to stop his words. "Don't say anymore. You're a god. You were simply acting like a god."
Hades clutched her hand. "No! I am not like the others. Everything I said to you in the forge was a lie. I was angry. I was hurt. It is hard for me to understand that you can be with me, and share yourself with Apol o, too. I..." he faltered. "It is I who am not accustomed to the way immortals choose and then discard their lovers."
"Hades, Apol o is not my lover."
The God studied her face. "I saw him take you into his arms." Lina blinked in surprise. "You were there?"
"I fol owed you. I heard Demeter remind you of the way immortals love, then I watched Apol o hold you."
"If you had watched a little longer you would have seen that that's al that happened. I don't want Apol o, Hades. If what Demeter had said to me hadn't upset me so badly, I would never have let him touch me at al ."
Hades wiped his hand across his brow. "You don't desire Apol o, too?"
"No."
He bowed his head. "Then the pain I caused you was truly for no reason. I do not know if you can forgive me, but please believe me when I say that I do love you, Persephone." She turned her face away from him. "You don't love me, Hades. You love what you think I am. You don't real y know me at al ."
"How can you say that to me?" He grasped her chin and forced her to look at him.
"You just love the Goddess, not the woman inside her soul."
"You are wrong, Persephone, but let me tel you what I love and then you may decide for yourself. I love your curiosity about everything. I love how you see my realm with new, wondering eyes. I love your sense of humor. I love your kindness and your honesty. I love your unbridled passion. I love the way you bespel animals. I love your loyalty. I especial y love your stubbornness, because it was your stubbornness that did not let an ancient god remain trapped within his own denial and loneliness." Tears fel from Persephone's eyes and Hades brushed them gently away. "Now you tel me, what is it that I love - the goddess or her soul?"
"But you don't know... you can't real y know," she said brokenly.
"I know that I feel your presence before I see you. Something has happened to me, and it has little to do with anything physical. For the first time in an eternity, I understand why soul mates cannot be separated, even after death. It is because their hearts beat in tandem. While I was waiting outside your door, I could feel your heart breaking within. Let me heal it, Persephone, and in the mending of your heart, I wil save myself."
"Is it possible that you real y do love my soul?" Lina whispered. Hades smiled at her as he felt the fear inside him begin to thaw. "Death is completely enamored with Spring. If that is possible, then anything is possible, beloved." She melted into his arms and their lips met. Hades meant for the kiss to be soft and reassuring, but Persephone opened her mouth and pressed herself against him, demanding more. His desire for her flared and he moaned her name as he crushed her barely clad body against his chest.
"Make love to me," she gasped. "I need to feel you inside me." He lifted her in his arms and carried her to the bed, but as he began to strip the clothes from his body, she stopped him.
"Let me," she said.
She sat on the edge of the bed and Hades stood in front of her, forcing his hands to remain at his sides while she undressed him. He was wearing a shorter version of his voluminous robes, and she slowly unwound the linen from his muscular body. She slid her hands down his chest; his skin felt hot and slick to her touch. At his abdomen she bent forward and replaced her teasing hands with her mouth. He sucked in his breath as her tongue feathered sensation over his skin. She couldn't get enough of him. She felt like she had been awakened from the dead, and she needed his passion and his love and his touch to keep her anchored there with him. She loosened his loincloth and slid it from his hips. Then she stroked his hardness in her cool hands, al the while moving her mouth slowly lower. When she swal owed him his body spasmed and swayed.
"Your mouth is like a silken trap that has captured me," he moaned. He thought his knees might buckle.
She drew back and met his eyes. "Do you want to be free?"
He lifted her into his arms and held her tightly against his body. "Never," he breathed into her hair.
"Never, beloved."
She led him to her bed. While she stroked him he explored her body. The chemise was so thin that it felt like she had been wrapped in mist. He found her nipple, teasing and suckling it through the transparent material. He remembered the touches that brought her pleasure, and he did not need her to guide his hand. She responded to him as if they had been lovers for centuries. Suddenly she sat up and pulled the chemise from her body. When he moved to take her back into his arms, she stopped him.
"What is it, beloved?"
"I want you to do something for me."
"Anything," he said.
"I want you to make love to me with your eyes closed. Pretend you cannot see my body." She peered into his face as if she were searching for an answer written there. "Can you make love to me without looking at me?"
He smiled and closed his eyes. Blind, he opened his arms to her and she fel into his embrace. Surrounded by her scent and touch, Hades existed in a world of Persephone's sensations. Without seeing her, he had to pay more attention to her smal sounds and fol ow the flow of her hips and the movement of her body. When her breathing quickened and his name sighed from her lips he did not need to see her flushed face to know he was bringing her pleasure. In his soul he felt her need and Hades responded with caress after caress. And then he fil ed her body and they rocked together in an ancient rhythm that needed no sight or sound - only feelings. Later she nestled against him, her head resting on his shoulder. He didn't know it yet, but he had helped her to make her decision, and now that she had made it, she felt at peace. Whatever happened next, she would survive it. Nothing could ever be as terrible as the black nothingness of Tartarus. With Hades' help, she had found her way free of that ultimate nightmare, and now she must be free of al the lies remaining in her life. She wasn't wil ing to hide the truth from him any longer. Demeter's anger be damned, she would tel him. He deserved to know everything. He loved her soul.
"Hades, I have to tel you something."
The God smiled. "May I keep my eyes open?"
Lina laughed softly. "Yes."
She sat up so that she was facing him, the silk sheet wrapped around her naked body. Hades grabbed a few pil ows from the disheveled bed, and propped himself comfortably against the padded headboard. He raised his dark eyebrows questioningly.
"I didn't mean to go to Tartarus. It was an accident. I was too upset to realize where I was until it was too late."
Hades frowned. Just the thought of how close she had been to losing her soul made his stomach tighten. "I know, beloved. You don't have to explain it to me. It was my fault. If I hadn't hurt you - "
"Sssh..." Lina leaned forward and pressed a finger against his lips. "Let me finish." The God looked uncomfortable, but he remained silent.
"Tartarus was," she shivered, "horrible. It cal ed to me. It knew things about me - every bad thing I've ever done, or even ever thought about doing. Every mistake I've made. It caused me to lose myself. I could feel it capturing my soul. There was nothing I could do." She took his hand and laced her fingers with his. "Then I heard you. You cal ed me back. Me, Hades. The real me - the soul inside the body."
"I had to get you back. I love you," he said.
"And I love you, too. But you need to know more than that. I am not who you think I am. I am not
- "
" Enough, Persephone!" Demeter's voice cut through Lina's words. "Your time here is finished. You must return."
Appal ed, Hades shot from Persephone's bed. Giving no thought to his nakedness, he faced the Goddess who had materialized in the middle of his beloved's chamber.
"What do you mean by this intrusion, Demeter?" he chal enged. "This is not your realm. You have no right to trespass here."
"You dal y with my daughter, Lord of the Underworld, and I have come to reclaim her. I am her mother. That is al the right I need."
"You are not my mother." Lina enunciated the words carefully so that there could be no mistaking what she was saying. She stood next to Hades, clutching the sheet to her breasts. Demeter sighed. "Let us not play these childish games, Daughter. Your adventure has ended. It is time you return to your own reality."
"I know I can't stay, but I won't leave without tel ing him the truth. He deserves to know. He loves me."
"You are being a young fool," Demeter said.
"As you know very wel , I am not young. And let me tel you once and for al , I am not a fool, either." She faced Hades and looked into his eyes. "I'm not real y Persephone. My name is Carolina Francesca Santoro, but most people cal me Lina. I am a forty-three-year-old mortal woman who owns a bakery in a place cal ed Tulsa, Oklahoma. Demeter exchanged my soul with her daughter's." She glanced at
Demeter and her mouth twisted into a sardonic smile before she looked back at the God. "She said she would help me out with a problem I was having, and in exchange I needed to do a little job for her in the Underworld."
The God's eyes widened.
"Remember when you overheard her reminding me how immortals love? She wasn't reminding me, she was explaining it to me because I'm a mortal. The whole thing was new to me."
"You are not the Goddess of Spring?"
"No, I am definitely not the Goddess of Spring," Lina said. She was so relieved to final y be tel ing the truth, that she didn't notice that Hades' face had gone expressionless.
"So it has al been a lie," Hades said.
"I wanted to tel you, but I gave my word to Demeter that I would keep my real identity a secret." Lina tried to touch his arm, but Hades flinched away from her.
"The things you said to me... what we did together. It was al pretense?"
"No!" Lina felt her stomach knot as she watched Hades withdraw into himself. She reached out to him, but again he moved away from her. "I meant everything I said, everything I did. It's just this body that is a lie. Everything else has been real. I love you; that is real."
"How can love be based on a lie?" he said coldly.
"Please don't do this," she pleaded with him, trying to reach the man inside the God. "Don't let us part like this. We can't be together. I have to return to my own world, but let's not make hurtful words what we remember when we're apart."
"Do not beg for his love like a common mortal, Carolina," Demeter's voice interrupted Lina. "There is enough Goddess within you that you should have more pride."
Lina spun to face her. "You caused this! He does love me, he just feels betrayed because of your insistence on maintaining a lie. I don't blame him - how could he feel any other way right now?" Demeter raised on arched eyebrow. "You believe he loves you, Carolina Francesca Santoro? Then let us test your belief in this immortal's love."
With a flick of her wrist, Demeter showered Lina in golden sparks. Lina felt her body tremble and she was suddenly horribly dizzy. She closed her eyes, fighting against nausea. Then there was an odd settling feeling, like she had just stepped back into a comfortable pair of jeans. Before she opened her eyes she knew what she would see.
Across the room, the ful -length mirror - the mirror she had preened in just that morning -
reflected a new image. Lina's body was her own again. Gone was the lean young body of the Goddess. Lina's curves were fuller, and she was older and decidedly not perfect.
"You are a mortal." The God sounded strangled.
Lina shifted her gaze from the mirror to Hades. He was staring at her, his face a mask of shock and disbelief.
"Yes, I am a mortal," she said. Squaring her shoulders she dropped the sheet, exposing al of herself to him. "And I am also the woman who loves you."
Hades averted his face, and refused to look at her. "How could you have lied al this time?"
"And what good would the truth have done?" Demeter broke in indignantly. "You would have shunned her as you do now." Her tone turned sarcastic. "At least you final y possessed the body of a goddess, Lord of the Dead. The irony is that you have a mortal to thank for it. No true goddess would have you."
Hades clenched his jaw. While Demeter had been speaking his face had become very pale. When his eyes met Lina's she saw only anger and rejection reflected in their darkness.
"Leave my realm," he commanded in a voice that raised the hair on Lina's arms.
"Come, Carolina. Your time here is finished." Demeter moved to Lina's side and covered her with her cloak. Without another word, the Palace of Hades faded from around them.