Graduation Day
Page 22
Sunlight from a small window in the back provides the only illumination in the dim, musty room. It is enough light for me to decide to remain standing instead of taking a seat on the dusty floor. I check to make sure the transmitter I left here to block the tracking signals in our bracelets is still in place and then pace as I wait for Tomas to walk through the door. When he does, I drop my bag and run to him.
Wrapping my arms around his body, I lean my head against his chest, grateful to have him near. Tomas and I have known each other our whole lives. We have grown, worked, and survived The Testing together. Perhaps it shouldn’t surprise me still that we are joined now by love as well as friendship. I’m not sure what I would have done without Tomas beside me during the weeks after we left Five Lakes Colony. His faith in my abilities kept me strong. His strength and love helped me survive.
When his lips find mine, I throw myself into the kiss, knowing that when it ends I will have to tell him everything that has happened since we last saw each other. It has been less than two days but it feels like longer. For a moment, I allow myself the luxury of forgetting. I press myself against Tomas, feeling the warmth of his body seep into mine. His mouth becomes more insistent, and I meet it with a passion I didn’t know I possessed. We are both alive. We are together. With what is to come, I am not sure how long that will last.
The kisses grow in intensity until finally we step away from each other. My heart pounds. My breathing is shallow and quick. I long to kiss him again, but there will be time for that later. I hope. For now, too much has to be said.
As quickly as I can, I explain the events that transpired since I insisted he leave the rebel camp and return to the University without me. Raffe finding The Testing recordings. Michal’s giving them to Symon. Symon’s betrayal. Michal’s death. Tomas starts to ask questions but I keep talking. If I don’t, the emotions I’ve kept at bay over Michal’s death and the things I have now vowed to do will overwhelm me. I speak about contacting Zeen. The search for Damone. Enzo reporting Damone’s departure to Professor Holt. My trip to the city to find the president. The search of our residence.
“I’m glad your brother is safe, and he’s also right. You need to keep your head down and stay out of this from now on. Especially now that they appear to be searching for trouble here on campus.” Tomas takes my hand and squeezes it. “You’ve done all you can. The president can take it from here.”
I shake my head. “President Collindar can’t cancel the vote without losing the authority she still has left. She thinks she can postpone it for a week—which gives her time to implement a second plan to eliminate Dr. Barnes.”
“What plan is that?”
I lace my fingers through his, take a deep breath, and say, “Me.”
Tomas goes still. “I don’t understand. What does she think you can do that her own staff can’t?”
“She thinks I can kill Dr. Barnes and his top administrators.”
“That’s crazy. She can’t be serious.”
“It’s the same plan Ranetta’s rebel faction was supposed to execute,” I explain. “And it makes a terrible kind of sense. If Dr. Barnes and the other leaders are eliminated—”
“I’m not referring to the plan. I can understand why she’d believe that tactic is her only choice. What I don’t get is why she’s asking you to do it.”
“Symon was able to get Michal assigned to her office as a spy. There could be others who report back . . .” I pull my hand away and wrap my arms around myself. “I think she’s right. Asking me could be the only real chance of her plan succeeding.”
“Except that you aren’t a killer. Even when we were betrayed during The Testing, you refused to kill deliberately.” I start to protest but Tomas cuts me off. “If you really wanted to eliminate Will during the fourth test, you would have.”
But I did try. I can still feel the kick of the gun. My desperation as Tomas lay bleeding on the ground—a victim of Will’s desire to win at all costs. I wanted Will to pay for his betrayal. I failed then. This time I cannot.
“I know you want to end The Testing, Cia. I do too, but this is too much for the president to ask of you. This shouldn’t be your job.”
But it is.
Straightening my shoulders, I say, “I have been given an assignment by the president of the United Commonwealth, and I’m going to accept.” Fear wells up inside me, but alongside it is a determination as strong as steel. “I don’t want to hurt anyone, Tomas, but to end The Testing and save my brother and Daileen and everyone else, I will do this.”
“Are you sure?” I hear the unhappiness in his voice. Not long ago, he asked me to leave the University with him. When I refused, he chose to stay with me. But I know that’s still what he really wants. To flee. To go home. To pretend none of what we have seen and what we know is real. As much as I have planned to have him at my side during the weeks ahead, I love him. Because of that, I have to let him go.
“I am.” Two words from which there is no going back. I will do what I must. But Tomas doesn’t have to. “You don’t have to do this. You can leave.”
Pressure builds in my chest. Tears pool behind my eyes. I feel one fall as I steel myself against the pain. “I might not succeed,” I say. “If I don’t, one of us should go back to Five Lakes and tell Magistrate Owens what’s happening here. Our families and friends need to be prepared for whatever comes. They need you.”
Wrapping my arms around his body, I lean my head against his chest, grateful to have him near. Tomas and I have known each other our whole lives. We have grown, worked, and survived The Testing together. Perhaps it shouldn’t surprise me still that we are joined now by love as well as friendship. I’m not sure what I would have done without Tomas beside me during the weeks after we left Five Lakes Colony. His faith in my abilities kept me strong. His strength and love helped me survive.
When his lips find mine, I throw myself into the kiss, knowing that when it ends I will have to tell him everything that has happened since we last saw each other. It has been less than two days but it feels like longer. For a moment, I allow myself the luxury of forgetting. I press myself against Tomas, feeling the warmth of his body seep into mine. His mouth becomes more insistent, and I meet it with a passion I didn’t know I possessed. We are both alive. We are together. With what is to come, I am not sure how long that will last.
The kisses grow in intensity until finally we step away from each other. My heart pounds. My breathing is shallow and quick. I long to kiss him again, but there will be time for that later. I hope. For now, too much has to be said.
As quickly as I can, I explain the events that transpired since I insisted he leave the rebel camp and return to the University without me. Raffe finding The Testing recordings. Michal’s giving them to Symon. Symon’s betrayal. Michal’s death. Tomas starts to ask questions but I keep talking. If I don’t, the emotions I’ve kept at bay over Michal’s death and the things I have now vowed to do will overwhelm me. I speak about contacting Zeen. The search for Damone. Enzo reporting Damone’s departure to Professor Holt. My trip to the city to find the president. The search of our residence.
“I’m glad your brother is safe, and he’s also right. You need to keep your head down and stay out of this from now on. Especially now that they appear to be searching for trouble here on campus.” Tomas takes my hand and squeezes it. “You’ve done all you can. The president can take it from here.”
I shake my head. “President Collindar can’t cancel the vote without losing the authority she still has left. She thinks she can postpone it for a week—which gives her time to implement a second plan to eliminate Dr. Barnes.”
“What plan is that?”
I lace my fingers through his, take a deep breath, and say, “Me.”
Tomas goes still. “I don’t understand. What does she think you can do that her own staff can’t?”
“She thinks I can kill Dr. Barnes and his top administrators.”
“That’s crazy. She can’t be serious.”
“It’s the same plan Ranetta’s rebel faction was supposed to execute,” I explain. “And it makes a terrible kind of sense. If Dr. Barnes and the other leaders are eliminated—”
“I’m not referring to the plan. I can understand why she’d believe that tactic is her only choice. What I don’t get is why she’s asking you to do it.”
“Symon was able to get Michal assigned to her office as a spy. There could be others who report back . . .” I pull my hand away and wrap my arms around myself. “I think she’s right. Asking me could be the only real chance of her plan succeeding.”
“Except that you aren’t a killer. Even when we were betrayed during The Testing, you refused to kill deliberately.” I start to protest but Tomas cuts me off. “If you really wanted to eliminate Will during the fourth test, you would have.”
But I did try. I can still feel the kick of the gun. My desperation as Tomas lay bleeding on the ground—a victim of Will’s desire to win at all costs. I wanted Will to pay for his betrayal. I failed then. This time I cannot.
“I know you want to end The Testing, Cia. I do too, but this is too much for the president to ask of you. This shouldn’t be your job.”
But it is.
Straightening my shoulders, I say, “I have been given an assignment by the president of the United Commonwealth, and I’m going to accept.” Fear wells up inside me, but alongside it is a determination as strong as steel. “I don’t want to hurt anyone, Tomas, but to end The Testing and save my brother and Daileen and everyone else, I will do this.”
“Are you sure?” I hear the unhappiness in his voice. Not long ago, he asked me to leave the University with him. When I refused, he chose to stay with me. But I know that’s still what he really wants. To flee. To go home. To pretend none of what we have seen and what we know is real. As much as I have planned to have him at my side during the weeks ahead, I love him. Because of that, I have to let him go.
“I am.” Two words from which there is no going back. I will do what I must. But Tomas doesn’t have to. “You don’t have to do this. You can leave.”
Pressure builds in my chest. Tears pool behind my eyes. I feel one fall as I steel myself against the pain. “I might not succeed,” I say. “If I don’t, one of us should go back to Five Lakes and tell Magistrate Owens what’s happening here. Our families and friends need to be prepared for whatever comes. They need you.”
