Here Be Sexist Vampires
Page 5
She had her head tilted to the side as she returned my glare, but her expression was blank. I could guess why she was here. “Come to contest my decision?” I asked as I leant casually against the front of my bureau. “I thought you wouldn’t want to work for a sexist twat.”
“I earned a spot. And you know it. I suppose whipping you into place didn’t do anything for my chances seen as you obviously have an ego as swollen as a horse’s rigid dick.”
The laugh just burst out of me. “You’re powerful, I’ll give you that. But there’s a lot more to being in the legion than being agile and gifted.”
“Explain it to me.”
I sighed. “Some of the things that the recruits will be required to do...Let’s just say they’re not for the faint-hearted. There’s no space for compassion or even guilt.”
“So...because I’m a woman, I must be faint-hearted, compassionate and prone to guilt-trips?”
My smile widened a little. She couldn’t have any idea how much her attitude was making me want her right now.
“You know what, Commander Michaels” – there was no respect in the title, it was patronising, and I loved it – “I would have thought that today might have at least taught you one thing; women might just be able to handle things better than what you give them credit for. You held blood to my lips” – I’d wanted her to lick my finger badly – “and I didn’t even so much as twitch. You had me playing Tarzan in the forest with that giant ogre chasing me and I delivered on that task as well. Then you purposely left me ’til last for the third task so that I’d have to duel with you...and let’s not butter up the fact that I put you on your backside.”
“But those tasks are not nearly as bad as what tasks you get once you’re in the legion. Some will keep you up at night. Stick with you forever.”
Her eyes narrowed, she slowly slid off the desk with the smoothness of a snake and approached me in a predatory manner. With only a footstep between us, she spoke, “Well let me tell you something. I’ve done things in my time that would make the curly hairs in your pants go straight. Female or not, I reckon I’ve got bigger balls than you have.”
Her voice went even raspier when she was irritated and that just made me want her even more. I found myself wondering what it would be like to bury my fingers in that dark hair or claim her mouth. I didn’t bother masking my desire for her. I let my eyes wander to her full lips. I let the red tint to my irises be prominent. Then I watched her face as she noticed. She didn’t shrink away. Instead more defiance entered her expression as she shot me a ‘not a chance’ look. I strongly disagreed. A part of her wanted me, I could sense it.
“So, you want me to give you a trial-run in my squad?”
She tilted her head again. “No.”
The office doors then opened and in strode Antonio, his bodyguards and Pit Bulls flanking him. The dogs, to my complete shock, trotted over to Sam, sniffing and nuzzling her. Antonio didn’t seem surprised, which also shocked me.
“You have told him the news?” Antonio asked Sam.
“News?” I queried. Something told me that I wasn’t going to like this. Mostly it was her smug expression.
“You will both be working together.”
“We’ll both be what?”
“I’ve offered Miss Parker -”
“For the gazillionth time will you just call me Sam?” she stressed.
Antonio smiled at her indulgently, like a father. What the hell had been going on? “You’ve offered her...?” I prompted.
“The role of aiding you with training your squad to control their gifts.”
“Isn’t that great?” she said with fake enthusiasm.
Antonio looked as though he was stifling a chuckle. Great, the joke’s on me. “You made this decision without first speaking to me,” I said in a low voice, feeling overlooked.
He sighed. “Jared, you know that I hold you in the highest esteem. You know how valuable I consider you to be. You know that I trust in your capability -”
“But I’m apparently not capable enough.”
“I have my reasons for needing the squad properly prepared without delay. I will be holding a meeting tomorrow during which all will be explained to you, Sam and the other commanders. What I will assure you of now is that my employing Sam is not a reflection on you or my faith in you.”
“Yeah, right.” That’s when I walked out.
(Sam)
“Well that went well,” I said after Jared slammed the door shut behind him.
Antonio sighed. “After a little time alone with his thoughts he will be fine.”
“I certainly hope he isn’t.”
“In the meantime, please acquaint yourself with your personal assistant.”
“I have a personal assistant?”
“Fletcher has been Jared’s assistant for the past three years, and now he is also yours. A fellow Brit, too. Fletcher?”
In a blink Fletcher appeared, his hands clasped together and his eyes shining with enthusiasm. I realised that I had seen him at what looked like a reception desk outside the room. The feminine way with which he held himself and the fact that he was so colour coordinated to the extent that he sported designer glasses that had a navy frame to match his navy suit all told me one thing: Fletcher was homosexual. And so cute. He had the cutest baby face that looked almost perfectly circular and was framed by short, tight mahogany curls. The most adorable dimples decorated his naturally pouty lips. I just wanted to pinch his cheeks like a grandmother would do to a child.
“Yes you’re Grandness?” He was a Londoner too? Even better. I could tell just by looking at him that we were going to have such a laugh.
“Fletcher, I’d like you to meet Commander Sam Parker. You may have noticed a new bureau and leather desk chair being brought in here. Sam will be working with Jared, so I hope you will be just as valuable to her as you are to Jared.”
Nodding, Fletcher said, “That goes without saying, your Grandness.”
Antonio returned his focus to me. “Sebastian will ensure that your Sire is notified of your employment here. I’m sure he’ll be delighted about it.” Wearing a sly smile he and his entourage left the room.
Fletcher approached me and held out his hand, “’Ello Commander, I’m -”
“Let me stop you right there,” I said, smiling. “No Commander Parker – I beg you. Just call me Sam.”
“Oh my God, you’re a Cockney like me! D’ya know, I was the only Brit in The Hollow ’til now.”
“The Hollow?”
“That’s what we call the place, luv. Hmm, I suppose the teleportation process didn’t give you a great view. Come with me.”
It turned out that Fletcher had a feminine walk too. This Keja just got cuter and cuter. He led me up two flights of stairs to the roof of the building. “There,” he said, pointing down. “See?”
“My God.” The place was humungous. Like a holiday camp or something. Several buildings were scattered around, forming a rectangle shape around a man-made, white-sanded beach that had a bridge in the middle. It had a real relaxed Caribbean feel about it. “Where are we exactly?”
“A little island just south of St. Lucia, luv. You won’t find it on any map. The proper name for this exclusive community here is The Hollow. This here, as you know, is The Command Centre. It has ten offices; one for each Commander. You’re now the eleventh, but of course you share an office with Jared.”
“So there are ten squads in the legion?”
“Yes, with ten vamps in each one.” He gestured to the main mansion which was to our left. “That’s Antonio’s residence. The only other vamps who reside there are Sebastian, his consorts – the greedy git’s got about fourteen of them – and his Advisor. Oh and his personal guards, you might have noticed he’s got plenty of them. He mostly stays there. Then to the left of the mansion is the Guest House. We don’t get many guests as Antonio likes his privacy. Then there’re two Residence Halls for his general staff like the chefs and maids and maintenance people and what-have-ya. Then the row of buildings directly facing us are shops and cafes and restaurants and bars, oh and there’s a cinema and a bowling alley and even a nightclub.”
“You’re kidding?”
Fletcher grinned. “I’m glad I’m not. With all those bars and shops, this is my Graceland.”
“Is there a clothes shop? I’ve only got enough stuff to last me till tomorrow. Something tells me that my Sire will not nicely pass along my belongings,” I grumbled.
“Oh yeah, there’s nothing those stores don’t have. The idea behind Antonio’s design of The Hollow was so that he wouldn’t have to leave. As the Grand High Master, he has to worry about attempts on his life. If someone was to kill him then they would have the right to fight the Heir, which is Jared, for the position of the Grand High Master. So, Antonio built himself and his bloodline and his staff a nice little community. Or a world within a world, as he likes to call it.”
“So...anyone who works here can’t leave?”
“Oh don’t worry, luv, it’s not like a prison,” he giggled. “People can venture out if Antonio gives them permission. I’ve never met anyone who wants to leave. All staff gets full use of that lovely beach there and plenty of time off, and the pay’s good. Most important to them, they have the best vampiric protection they could possibly have. There’s no securer place to be.”
I gazed around me, astonished and in awe of Antonio’s little community. “What’re these buildings to our right?”
“Oh, that’s the Residence Hall for commanders and their consorts and personal assistants. Then you’ve got the Residence Hall for all the members of the legion, and another one for any humans. And that last building in the corner by the nightclub is the security lodge.” He twirled on the spot and then urged me to the opposite edge of the roof. “Last but not least, we have all this.”
The view overlooked the pool and gardens of Antonio’s mansion, the arena where the tryout had taken place, the small forest that I had not long ago been chased through, and also a beach. It was absolutely breathtaking with the azure blue sea and white sand. So inviting.
“Only Antonio, the commanders, and the legion have access to this beach,” Fletcher told me. “That’s why he has the man-made beach for the other vamps. So...what d’ya think?”
I smiled at him. “It’s alright, I suppose.”
He elbowed me gently. “Give over. It’s fabulous.”
Back at the office Fletcher handed me documents upon documents about the history of The Hollow and the legion. I made myself comfy on my leather chair, balancing my feet on the bureau, as I settled with the files while Fletcher was in the process of gathering as much available personal information as possible on the new squad members to create their own personal files. I was eager to read them and get a proper idea of who I would be coaching – a job that was in effect from tomorrow.
“Reading up on the history of the legion, huh,” said Jared, leaning against his bureau gazing at me. He was getting a good look at my legs, like he was trying to see through my pants. Self-conscious – not many people ever made me feel self-conscious – I was itching to drop my legs from the table. But then he would know that he had made me feel self-conscious, and he would get off on that.
Then a thought came to me: How had I not heard him or sensed him enter the room?
As if guessing my train of thought, he said, “I can teleport.”
“You have two gifts? How is that possible?”
“I have three, actually. My natural gift is electrokinesis, but Antonio has the power to pass on gifts. Twice he singled me out to receive two others as rewards.”
“So what’s the third?”
Telepathy, I heard in my head. It was like hearing him talk through a mobile phone.
“You can read thoughts?” I sounded horrified by the idea, which made him smile.
No, but I can communicate using my mind, he replied.
I was extremely relieved that he couldn’t read my thoughts; no way did I want him to know how gorgeous I thought he was, or that I was trying so hard to not ogle, or that I was hoping to get a good look at his backside the next time he turned around. “Good for you.” I tried to sound uninterested in him or his attempt at conversation and returned my attention to the documents.
“You could have said that with your mind, you know.”
“I thought you said you couldn’t read thoughts.”
“I can’t. But if you direct a thought at me, I’ll hear it.”
I looked up at him and smirked. I’d like to slice off your salami and shove it up your sexist arse.
His smile became a mischievous grin as he arched a brow. So you’ve been thinking about my salami?
I scowled at him and went back to the documents, but apparently he wasn’t finished teasing me yet.
Well, you’ve been thinking about my salami so I suppose I could think about you na**d, and then we’d be even.
“No, no, I do not want you thinking about me na**d.”
You really should’ve said something sooner.
I meant to scowl at him again but the intense red glow in his eyes froze me for a second. It was almost impossible not to get a kick out of someone as gorgeous as him wanting you, even if they were a sod. Recovering quickly, I asked, “So where’re our new recruits?”
“My new recruits are having a tour of The Hollow, and then they’ll get settled into their accommodation before dawn.”
“I earned a spot. And you know it. I suppose whipping you into place didn’t do anything for my chances seen as you obviously have an ego as swollen as a horse’s rigid dick.”
The laugh just burst out of me. “You’re powerful, I’ll give you that. But there’s a lot more to being in the legion than being agile and gifted.”
“Explain it to me.”
I sighed. “Some of the things that the recruits will be required to do...Let’s just say they’re not for the faint-hearted. There’s no space for compassion or even guilt.”
“So...because I’m a woman, I must be faint-hearted, compassionate and prone to guilt-trips?”
My smile widened a little. She couldn’t have any idea how much her attitude was making me want her right now.
“You know what, Commander Michaels” – there was no respect in the title, it was patronising, and I loved it – “I would have thought that today might have at least taught you one thing; women might just be able to handle things better than what you give them credit for. You held blood to my lips” – I’d wanted her to lick my finger badly – “and I didn’t even so much as twitch. You had me playing Tarzan in the forest with that giant ogre chasing me and I delivered on that task as well. Then you purposely left me ’til last for the third task so that I’d have to duel with you...and let’s not butter up the fact that I put you on your backside.”
“But those tasks are not nearly as bad as what tasks you get once you’re in the legion. Some will keep you up at night. Stick with you forever.”
Her eyes narrowed, she slowly slid off the desk with the smoothness of a snake and approached me in a predatory manner. With only a footstep between us, she spoke, “Well let me tell you something. I’ve done things in my time that would make the curly hairs in your pants go straight. Female or not, I reckon I’ve got bigger balls than you have.”
Her voice went even raspier when she was irritated and that just made me want her even more. I found myself wondering what it would be like to bury my fingers in that dark hair or claim her mouth. I didn’t bother masking my desire for her. I let my eyes wander to her full lips. I let the red tint to my irises be prominent. Then I watched her face as she noticed. She didn’t shrink away. Instead more defiance entered her expression as she shot me a ‘not a chance’ look. I strongly disagreed. A part of her wanted me, I could sense it.
“So, you want me to give you a trial-run in my squad?”
She tilted her head again. “No.”
The office doors then opened and in strode Antonio, his bodyguards and Pit Bulls flanking him. The dogs, to my complete shock, trotted over to Sam, sniffing and nuzzling her. Antonio didn’t seem surprised, which also shocked me.
“You have told him the news?” Antonio asked Sam.
“News?” I queried. Something told me that I wasn’t going to like this. Mostly it was her smug expression.
“You will both be working together.”
“We’ll both be what?”
“I’ve offered Miss Parker -”
“For the gazillionth time will you just call me Sam?” she stressed.
Antonio smiled at her indulgently, like a father. What the hell had been going on? “You’ve offered her...?” I prompted.
“The role of aiding you with training your squad to control their gifts.”
“Isn’t that great?” she said with fake enthusiasm.
Antonio looked as though he was stifling a chuckle. Great, the joke’s on me. “You made this decision without first speaking to me,” I said in a low voice, feeling overlooked.
He sighed. “Jared, you know that I hold you in the highest esteem. You know how valuable I consider you to be. You know that I trust in your capability -”
“But I’m apparently not capable enough.”
“I have my reasons for needing the squad properly prepared without delay. I will be holding a meeting tomorrow during which all will be explained to you, Sam and the other commanders. What I will assure you of now is that my employing Sam is not a reflection on you or my faith in you.”
“Yeah, right.” That’s when I walked out.
(Sam)
“Well that went well,” I said after Jared slammed the door shut behind him.
Antonio sighed. “After a little time alone with his thoughts he will be fine.”
“I certainly hope he isn’t.”
“In the meantime, please acquaint yourself with your personal assistant.”
“I have a personal assistant?”
“Fletcher has been Jared’s assistant for the past three years, and now he is also yours. A fellow Brit, too. Fletcher?”
In a blink Fletcher appeared, his hands clasped together and his eyes shining with enthusiasm. I realised that I had seen him at what looked like a reception desk outside the room. The feminine way with which he held himself and the fact that he was so colour coordinated to the extent that he sported designer glasses that had a navy frame to match his navy suit all told me one thing: Fletcher was homosexual. And so cute. He had the cutest baby face that looked almost perfectly circular and was framed by short, tight mahogany curls. The most adorable dimples decorated his naturally pouty lips. I just wanted to pinch his cheeks like a grandmother would do to a child.
“Yes you’re Grandness?” He was a Londoner too? Even better. I could tell just by looking at him that we were going to have such a laugh.
“Fletcher, I’d like you to meet Commander Sam Parker. You may have noticed a new bureau and leather desk chair being brought in here. Sam will be working with Jared, so I hope you will be just as valuable to her as you are to Jared.”
Nodding, Fletcher said, “That goes without saying, your Grandness.”
Antonio returned his focus to me. “Sebastian will ensure that your Sire is notified of your employment here. I’m sure he’ll be delighted about it.” Wearing a sly smile he and his entourage left the room.
Fletcher approached me and held out his hand, “’Ello Commander, I’m -”
“Let me stop you right there,” I said, smiling. “No Commander Parker – I beg you. Just call me Sam.”
“Oh my God, you’re a Cockney like me! D’ya know, I was the only Brit in The Hollow ’til now.”
“The Hollow?”
“That’s what we call the place, luv. Hmm, I suppose the teleportation process didn’t give you a great view. Come with me.”
It turned out that Fletcher had a feminine walk too. This Keja just got cuter and cuter. He led me up two flights of stairs to the roof of the building. “There,” he said, pointing down. “See?”
“My God.” The place was humungous. Like a holiday camp or something. Several buildings were scattered around, forming a rectangle shape around a man-made, white-sanded beach that had a bridge in the middle. It had a real relaxed Caribbean feel about it. “Where are we exactly?”
“A little island just south of St. Lucia, luv. You won’t find it on any map. The proper name for this exclusive community here is The Hollow. This here, as you know, is The Command Centre. It has ten offices; one for each Commander. You’re now the eleventh, but of course you share an office with Jared.”
“So there are ten squads in the legion?”
“Yes, with ten vamps in each one.” He gestured to the main mansion which was to our left. “That’s Antonio’s residence. The only other vamps who reside there are Sebastian, his consorts – the greedy git’s got about fourteen of them – and his Advisor. Oh and his personal guards, you might have noticed he’s got plenty of them. He mostly stays there. Then to the left of the mansion is the Guest House. We don’t get many guests as Antonio likes his privacy. Then there’re two Residence Halls for his general staff like the chefs and maids and maintenance people and what-have-ya. Then the row of buildings directly facing us are shops and cafes and restaurants and bars, oh and there’s a cinema and a bowling alley and even a nightclub.”
“You’re kidding?”
Fletcher grinned. “I’m glad I’m not. With all those bars and shops, this is my Graceland.”
“Is there a clothes shop? I’ve only got enough stuff to last me till tomorrow. Something tells me that my Sire will not nicely pass along my belongings,” I grumbled.
“Oh yeah, there’s nothing those stores don’t have. The idea behind Antonio’s design of The Hollow was so that he wouldn’t have to leave. As the Grand High Master, he has to worry about attempts on his life. If someone was to kill him then they would have the right to fight the Heir, which is Jared, for the position of the Grand High Master. So, Antonio built himself and his bloodline and his staff a nice little community. Or a world within a world, as he likes to call it.”
“So...anyone who works here can’t leave?”
“Oh don’t worry, luv, it’s not like a prison,” he giggled. “People can venture out if Antonio gives them permission. I’ve never met anyone who wants to leave. All staff gets full use of that lovely beach there and plenty of time off, and the pay’s good. Most important to them, they have the best vampiric protection they could possibly have. There’s no securer place to be.”
I gazed around me, astonished and in awe of Antonio’s little community. “What’re these buildings to our right?”
“Oh, that’s the Residence Hall for commanders and their consorts and personal assistants. Then you’ve got the Residence Hall for all the members of the legion, and another one for any humans. And that last building in the corner by the nightclub is the security lodge.” He twirled on the spot and then urged me to the opposite edge of the roof. “Last but not least, we have all this.”
The view overlooked the pool and gardens of Antonio’s mansion, the arena where the tryout had taken place, the small forest that I had not long ago been chased through, and also a beach. It was absolutely breathtaking with the azure blue sea and white sand. So inviting.
“Only Antonio, the commanders, and the legion have access to this beach,” Fletcher told me. “That’s why he has the man-made beach for the other vamps. So...what d’ya think?”
I smiled at him. “It’s alright, I suppose.”
He elbowed me gently. “Give over. It’s fabulous.”
Back at the office Fletcher handed me documents upon documents about the history of The Hollow and the legion. I made myself comfy on my leather chair, balancing my feet on the bureau, as I settled with the files while Fletcher was in the process of gathering as much available personal information as possible on the new squad members to create their own personal files. I was eager to read them and get a proper idea of who I would be coaching – a job that was in effect from tomorrow.
“Reading up on the history of the legion, huh,” said Jared, leaning against his bureau gazing at me. He was getting a good look at my legs, like he was trying to see through my pants. Self-conscious – not many people ever made me feel self-conscious – I was itching to drop my legs from the table. But then he would know that he had made me feel self-conscious, and he would get off on that.
Then a thought came to me: How had I not heard him or sensed him enter the room?
As if guessing my train of thought, he said, “I can teleport.”
“You have two gifts? How is that possible?”
“I have three, actually. My natural gift is electrokinesis, but Antonio has the power to pass on gifts. Twice he singled me out to receive two others as rewards.”
“So what’s the third?”
Telepathy, I heard in my head. It was like hearing him talk through a mobile phone.
“You can read thoughts?” I sounded horrified by the idea, which made him smile.
No, but I can communicate using my mind, he replied.
I was extremely relieved that he couldn’t read my thoughts; no way did I want him to know how gorgeous I thought he was, or that I was trying so hard to not ogle, or that I was hoping to get a good look at his backside the next time he turned around. “Good for you.” I tried to sound uninterested in him or his attempt at conversation and returned my attention to the documents.
“You could have said that with your mind, you know.”
“I thought you said you couldn’t read thoughts.”
“I can’t. But if you direct a thought at me, I’ll hear it.”
I looked up at him and smirked. I’d like to slice off your salami and shove it up your sexist arse.
His smile became a mischievous grin as he arched a brow. So you’ve been thinking about my salami?
I scowled at him and went back to the documents, but apparently he wasn’t finished teasing me yet.
Well, you’ve been thinking about my salami so I suppose I could think about you na**d, and then we’d be even.
“No, no, I do not want you thinking about me na**d.”
You really should’ve said something sooner.
I meant to scowl at him again but the intense red glow in his eyes froze me for a second. It was almost impossible not to get a kick out of someone as gorgeous as him wanting you, even if they were a sod. Recovering quickly, I asked, “So where’re our new recruits?”
“My new recruits are having a tour of The Hollow, and then they’ll get settled into their accommodation before dawn.”
