Honor Student
Page 9
Last chance
I slipped it into my purse and shrugged my shoulders. I took a long sip from my glass as I felt an arm wrap around my waist. I nearly spilled it all over me as I spun around to see who it was.
“Long time, no see” Jeff said beaming from ear to ear.
“Hey!” I replied, giving him a half hug, carefully not to get too close.
“I was hoping tonight we would get the chance to dance.” He said shyly. I nodded but had no intention of dancing. Sober, I had two left feet at best. My purse vibrated and I glanced down at it, leaving it inside me bag.
I will f**king kill him if he puts his hand on you again.
“You know what? I would love to dance!” I said, grabbing Jeff’s hand and dragging him onto the floor. It was so crowded I had no choice but to be against him as I moved my hips to the music, trying desperately to look like I was enjoying myself. After a while, I almost forgot that I was doing it out of revenge and began to enjoy myself. Claire and Becka joined us with a couple of guys from school and we all laughed and danced together. I turned around, scanning the bar for William. He stood facing me, the pretty little blonde pressed up against him as he whispered in her ear. I felt my heart sink in to my stomach as I stood there, staring back at him. His eyes narrowed.
“Come on!” Becka yelled grabbing my arm. I turned my back to William giving it my best effort to look un-phased, but I was dying inside.
“Mr. Honor left!” Claire said to Becka and I struggled to listen in.
“Not like you had a chance with him anyway.” Becka shot back, flipping her hair. I glanced to the bar. Mr. Honor was nowhere in sight and the pretty blonde that was all over him was missing.
“I’m going to use the bathroom.” I shouted in Becka’s ear. I made my way through the crowd to the far side of the building. For as busy as the place was, the bathroom was virtually empty. I stood at the sink, staring at myself for a long moment. I knew coming out here was a bad decision. I made my way back out to the bar and ordered myself another drink. I sipped it as I watched all of my new friends dance and have a great time. They were oblivious to my absence.
I drank another, alone as stared at my cell phone. No new messages. I pulled up Becka’s number as I watched them.
My Aunt called. She wants to make amends.
I hit send and waited for her to reply.
You better call me tomorrow!
Her message flashed across my screen and I breathed a sigh of relief. She was too caught up in her fun to argue with me. I finished my drink and set the glass down on the bar before making my way outside. The night air was chilly and I cursed Becka under my breath for dressing me up like a living Barbie doll. I pulled up the internet on my phone and tried to search for a cab service. I could not get a strong enough signal so I held my phone in the air. After a moment, I gave up and walked towards the sidewalk in front of the club. A sleek black car pulled up beside me and my heart leapt in my throat as the window lowered. I stopped, waiting for him to say something, refusing to look his direction.
“Get the f**k in the car.” His voice was low and did not waiver. I swallowed hard, fighting back the anger that I had felt when I thought he had left with that other woman. “Don’t make me repeat myself.” I bit my lip and opened the door, never meeting his gaze. He pulled off fast into the traffic and I quickly wrapped the seatbelt around my waist. I hated him, but I knew everything that happened tonight was my fault. I crossed my arms over my chest and stared out into the night as everything flew by in a blur.
When we reached his place, he got out of the car, slamming his door and headed up the steps. I stood by the vehicle, wondering if I should leave. I knew things were going to get a lot worse before they got better, if they did get any better at all. I bit my lip and moved towards the stairs. As I made my way to the top, he stood by the door, his eyes burning into me. I looked at the floor as I slinked passed him.
Chapter Twenty
The floor was almost completely dark. The only light came from a few street lamps that shined through the oversized windows. He walked across the expansive floor and opened the door to the elevator. I bit my lip as I followed. I was terrified to find out what he was like on that floor when he was angry. His eyes narrowed as he waited for me. I bit my lip and walked in next to him, unable to run away. He never looked back at me. I wanted to reach out and touch him, but even on a good day, that was not the best idea.
As we made it to the next floor, I sobered up in the blink of an eye. The devices that lined the floor looked like a medieval torture chamber. He stepped inside the room, glancing at each device. “Come here.” He said sternly, but his voice was low. I stepped out of the elevator and walked slowly up beside him. He was silent for a moment.
“What are you thinking?” I asked, my voice barely a whisper. His lip curled into a smirk.
“I was thinking… I don’t know if I trust myself with you right now.” He glanced at me out of the corner of his eye. I understood immediately. He was worried he would hurt me, really hurt me. His revelation scared me but the thought of His hands touching my body sent an overpowering desire to be with him through my body. I bit my lip and stared up at him, waiting for his decision. He reached over and gently pulled my lip from my teeth, running his thumb along them. He turned his body towards mine and took a long slow breath.
“I trust you.” I whispered as his finger brushed gently along my mouth. He looked disgusted at my statement.
“You wouldn’t say that if you any idea what I thought of doing to you tonight.” He warned. I stepped forward slowly, gaging his reaction. His body tensed but he did not move away.
“Punish me.” I replied, trying to keep my voice from shaking. His eyes locked on to mine and for a moment he was not sure he had heard me correctly. “Punish me.” I repeated, biting my lip again. I reached out and slowly ran my hand down his chest. His muscles flexed under my fingers. He glanced down at my hand and then back to me.
“You remember the safe word?” he asked. I swallowed hard.
“Flower” I whispered. In an instant, my hands were in his. He squeezed my wrists tightly but I fought to hold back from whimpering. He dragged me across the dark floor, walking through the barbaric contraptions. I held my breath as he slowed, taking in each one.
Finally, we stopped in front of a large black device. It had a large incline on one side and two smaller on the other. I struggled to control my breathing, but my chest heaved under my fear.
“Bend over” he said, his face shown of disgust and he did not look me in the eye. I had no idea what this device was so I stood there, looking back helplessly at him. He pushed me forcefully over it, bending me at the waist. He quickly pulled my legs to each incline of the device and locked them into place with leather straps. He made his way to where my face was and I glanced up at him, as panic began to set in. He pulled my arms down and strapped them below my head. I was folded nearly in half.
“William, I’m sorry.” I said quietly. He walked back behind me, out of sight.
“Not nearly as sorry as you’re going to be.” He said angrily. Tears welled up in my eyes as I lay helpless. William pushed my skirt up to my waist and I could hear him begin to undress. The room fell silent for a moment and I thought that he might have changed his mind. I quickly realized differently as pain shot throughout my body. He pulled the belt back, slapping it hard against my bottom. I screamed out in agony but my voice caught in my throat, only a whimper escaping. I tensed my muscles as blow after blow came.
“Stop” I yelled as I finally found my voice but he did not relent. He struck me again and again as the tears poured from my eyes. “Please” I begged.
“Do you have any idea what I wanted to do to you at that club? Any idea what I wanted to do to that guy who had his hands all over you?” he asked in between violent lashings. “I’m sorry” I choked. I realized that in his own twisted way he did care about me. He was hurt. I had hurt him. “Please” I whimpered as a sob escaped my lips. I heard the belt fall to the floor and he quickly undid my leg restraints. He made his way around to the front of me and unbelted my wrists, tipping my chin up with his fingers. He wiped my swollen cheeks with his hand and quickly lifted me off the device. He carried me to the elevator and I buried my face in his neck, crying quietly.
“Why didn’t you use the safe word?” he asked, looking at me like a little boy who broke his favorite toy.
“I didn’t want to upset you.” I whispered into his neck. The smell of him was intoxicating. I closed my eyes and breathed in as much of him as possible. He took me to his stark white bathroom. He stood me just inside the door as he ran warm water into the tub. “What are you doing?” I asked as I pushed the hair back from my face. Mr. Honor’s eyes danced over my disheveled outfit.
“I thought a bath might make you feel better.” He said sadly and I recognized the look on his face. He felt pity for me. I stumbled forward, placing my hand on his chest.
“Please, don’t go” I tried to hold back the tears but one escaped my eye. William rubbed my cheek with the pad of his thumb. I pushed forward, locking my lips onto his. He reciprocated and my mouth grew hungrier for him. I slipped my tongue past his lips but he grabbed my shoulders and pulled me back from him.
“Get washed up. You will feel better.” With that, he left the room. I began to cry to myself as I slowly pulled my ridiculous outfit off and tossed it on the cold floor. I dipped my toes in the water, which was perfectly warm. I slowly lowered myself down, the water stinging my sore bottom.
I thought about how my life had drastically changed after the last few days. I had been on a downward spiral, but after meeting Mr. Honor I felt like I had a reason to get up in the morning, a reason to show up to class. Here he was feeling as if he had ruined my life, but I felt like he had saved it. He had saved me. I was finally living.
I washed myself quickly and climbed out of the tub. I grabbed the oversize white towel that hung on the hook beside the sink and wrapped it loosely around my body. Wiping away the fog from the mirror, I stared at my reflection. I was pale, heavy dark circles under my eyes. I pulled open the drawer under the vanity and found an unopened toothbrush and tube of toothpaste. I brushed my teeth quickly and ran my fingers through my hair, trying my best to detangle it. When I looked as good as humanly possible, given the circumstances, I slipped the towel off, letting it fall to the floor. With a deep breath, I opened the bathroom door. I glanced around. Mr. Honor was nowhere in sight but I could hear his muffled voice coming from the other side of the room. I walked across the expansive space to his bedroom door. It was open and he was inside, his back to me with his phone at his ear. He was angry and I wondered if I should sneak back to the bathroom and grab the towel. My arm brushed against the door and it opened wider, creaking. Mr. Honor turned around and his eyes locked on to mine. I bit my lip nervously as I stood in front of him, forcing myself not to cover my body.
“Call me back if you hear anything. I have to go.” He said into the phone as his eyes narrowed, dancing over my body. He sat his phone on the dresser as he walked slowly towards me.
“Emma” he whispered quietly and I could not tell if he was upset. His moods changed so often it was hard to keep track of how he felt about me from moment to moment.
He stopped, inches from me, taking in the view.
“Are you mad at me?” I asked. He laughed at the idea.
“How could I ever be mad at you?” he looked genuinely hurt at the idea. He leaned down, kissing me softly on the fore head. I pressed my head harder against his lips and placed my hands softly on his muscular chest. “I’m mad at myself.” He confessed. “Get dressed. I need to take you home.” He turned to his dresser and pulled out a white t-shirt and an old pair of his dark wash jeans.
“But…you said it wasn’t safe for me there.” I took the clothing from him and held it over me.
“It’s not safe for you with me.” He had a pained expression on his face. I stepped towards him but he held up his hand for me to stop. Running his hands through his dark hair, he let out a deep sigh. “You can have the bed, I’ll take the couch.” He walked passed me and out into the main living space, not giving me the chance to object.
I slipped on the oversized white shirt and pulled opened his drawer to put the pants back in. Tucked between the other pairs was a small picture of a woman with long brown hair. I glanced behind me at the door to make sure Mr. Honor was still out in the main area. I flipped the picture over to see if there was a name on the back. In perfect cursive writing was the name Abby. I tucked it back into the drawer and slid in the extra pair of pants. I crawled into the bed and slipped under the covers. That night I dreamed about Mr. Honor with the mystery woman. I pictured him kissing her and holding her. I awoke suddenly, my heart pounding out of my chest, unable to catch my breath. Mr. Honor stood in the dark doorway, his face hard as stone.
“It was just a nightmare.” I reassured him, biting my lip. I could tell by the look on his face he knew I was dreaming about him. He turned and left the room without saying a word. I fell onto the pillow and drifted back off to sleep.
Chapter Twenty-One
Sun poured through the giant bay windows. I sat up, rubbing my eyes and stretching. The smell of coffee wafted through the air. I climbed out of the bed, realizing my bottom was still incredibly sore as I slid off the mattress. I tugged at the t-shirt as I walked out of the bedroom. Mr. Honor stood by the island wearing nothing but his boxer briefs. He ran his hand through his hair when he saw me. I looked down at the ground as I tucked my hair behind my ear.
“Coffee smells good.” I said, trying to sound upbeat. He grabbed the pot and poured a mug for me, and topped his cup off. I watched him over the brim of my mug as he rubbed his eyes. “Didn’t sleep?” I asked and he looked at me for a long moment.
I slipped it into my purse and shrugged my shoulders. I took a long sip from my glass as I felt an arm wrap around my waist. I nearly spilled it all over me as I spun around to see who it was.
“Long time, no see” Jeff said beaming from ear to ear.
“Hey!” I replied, giving him a half hug, carefully not to get too close.
“I was hoping tonight we would get the chance to dance.” He said shyly. I nodded but had no intention of dancing. Sober, I had two left feet at best. My purse vibrated and I glanced down at it, leaving it inside me bag.
I will f**king kill him if he puts his hand on you again.
“You know what? I would love to dance!” I said, grabbing Jeff’s hand and dragging him onto the floor. It was so crowded I had no choice but to be against him as I moved my hips to the music, trying desperately to look like I was enjoying myself. After a while, I almost forgot that I was doing it out of revenge and began to enjoy myself. Claire and Becka joined us with a couple of guys from school and we all laughed and danced together. I turned around, scanning the bar for William. He stood facing me, the pretty little blonde pressed up against him as he whispered in her ear. I felt my heart sink in to my stomach as I stood there, staring back at him. His eyes narrowed.
“Come on!” Becka yelled grabbing my arm. I turned my back to William giving it my best effort to look un-phased, but I was dying inside.
“Mr. Honor left!” Claire said to Becka and I struggled to listen in.
“Not like you had a chance with him anyway.” Becka shot back, flipping her hair. I glanced to the bar. Mr. Honor was nowhere in sight and the pretty blonde that was all over him was missing.
“I’m going to use the bathroom.” I shouted in Becka’s ear. I made my way through the crowd to the far side of the building. For as busy as the place was, the bathroom was virtually empty. I stood at the sink, staring at myself for a long moment. I knew coming out here was a bad decision. I made my way back out to the bar and ordered myself another drink. I sipped it as I watched all of my new friends dance and have a great time. They were oblivious to my absence.
I drank another, alone as stared at my cell phone. No new messages. I pulled up Becka’s number as I watched them.
My Aunt called. She wants to make amends.
I hit send and waited for her to reply.
You better call me tomorrow!
Her message flashed across my screen and I breathed a sigh of relief. She was too caught up in her fun to argue with me. I finished my drink and set the glass down on the bar before making my way outside. The night air was chilly and I cursed Becka under my breath for dressing me up like a living Barbie doll. I pulled up the internet on my phone and tried to search for a cab service. I could not get a strong enough signal so I held my phone in the air. After a moment, I gave up and walked towards the sidewalk in front of the club. A sleek black car pulled up beside me and my heart leapt in my throat as the window lowered. I stopped, waiting for him to say something, refusing to look his direction.
“Get the f**k in the car.” His voice was low and did not waiver. I swallowed hard, fighting back the anger that I had felt when I thought he had left with that other woman. “Don’t make me repeat myself.” I bit my lip and opened the door, never meeting his gaze. He pulled off fast into the traffic and I quickly wrapped the seatbelt around my waist. I hated him, but I knew everything that happened tonight was my fault. I crossed my arms over my chest and stared out into the night as everything flew by in a blur.
When we reached his place, he got out of the car, slamming his door and headed up the steps. I stood by the vehicle, wondering if I should leave. I knew things were going to get a lot worse before they got better, if they did get any better at all. I bit my lip and moved towards the stairs. As I made my way to the top, he stood by the door, his eyes burning into me. I looked at the floor as I slinked passed him.
Chapter Twenty
The floor was almost completely dark. The only light came from a few street lamps that shined through the oversized windows. He walked across the expansive floor and opened the door to the elevator. I bit my lip as I followed. I was terrified to find out what he was like on that floor when he was angry. His eyes narrowed as he waited for me. I bit my lip and walked in next to him, unable to run away. He never looked back at me. I wanted to reach out and touch him, but even on a good day, that was not the best idea.
As we made it to the next floor, I sobered up in the blink of an eye. The devices that lined the floor looked like a medieval torture chamber. He stepped inside the room, glancing at each device. “Come here.” He said sternly, but his voice was low. I stepped out of the elevator and walked slowly up beside him. He was silent for a moment.
“What are you thinking?” I asked, my voice barely a whisper. His lip curled into a smirk.
“I was thinking… I don’t know if I trust myself with you right now.” He glanced at me out of the corner of his eye. I understood immediately. He was worried he would hurt me, really hurt me. His revelation scared me but the thought of His hands touching my body sent an overpowering desire to be with him through my body. I bit my lip and stared up at him, waiting for his decision. He reached over and gently pulled my lip from my teeth, running his thumb along them. He turned his body towards mine and took a long slow breath.
“I trust you.” I whispered as his finger brushed gently along my mouth. He looked disgusted at my statement.
“You wouldn’t say that if you any idea what I thought of doing to you tonight.” He warned. I stepped forward slowly, gaging his reaction. His body tensed but he did not move away.
“Punish me.” I replied, trying to keep my voice from shaking. His eyes locked on to mine and for a moment he was not sure he had heard me correctly. “Punish me.” I repeated, biting my lip again. I reached out and slowly ran my hand down his chest. His muscles flexed under my fingers. He glanced down at my hand and then back to me.
“You remember the safe word?” he asked. I swallowed hard.
“Flower” I whispered. In an instant, my hands were in his. He squeezed my wrists tightly but I fought to hold back from whimpering. He dragged me across the dark floor, walking through the barbaric contraptions. I held my breath as he slowed, taking in each one.
Finally, we stopped in front of a large black device. It had a large incline on one side and two smaller on the other. I struggled to control my breathing, but my chest heaved under my fear.
“Bend over” he said, his face shown of disgust and he did not look me in the eye. I had no idea what this device was so I stood there, looking back helplessly at him. He pushed me forcefully over it, bending me at the waist. He quickly pulled my legs to each incline of the device and locked them into place with leather straps. He made his way to where my face was and I glanced up at him, as panic began to set in. He pulled my arms down and strapped them below my head. I was folded nearly in half.
“William, I’m sorry.” I said quietly. He walked back behind me, out of sight.
“Not nearly as sorry as you’re going to be.” He said angrily. Tears welled up in my eyes as I lay helpless. William pushed my skirt up to my waist and I could hear him begin to undress. The room fell silent for a moment and I thought that he might have changed his mind. I quickly realized differently as pain shot throughout my body. He pulled the belt back, slapping it hard against my bottom. I screamed out in agony but my voice caught in my throat, only a whimper escaping. I tensed my muscles as blow after blow came.
“Stop” I yelled as I finally found my voice but he did not relent. He struck me again and again as the tears poured from my eyes. “Please” I begged.
“Do you have any idea what I wanted to do to you at that club? Any idea what I wanted to do to that guy who had his hands all over you?” he asked in between violent lashings. “I’m sorry” I choked. I realized that in his own twisted way he did care about me. He was hurt. I had hurt him. “Please” I whimpered as a sob escaped my lips. I heard the belt fall to the floor and he quickly undid my leg restraints. He made his way around to the front of me and unbelted my wrists, tipping my chin up with his fingers. He wiped my swollen cheeks with his hand and quickly lifted me off the device. He carried me to the elevator and I buried my face in his neck, crying quietly.
“Why didn’t you use the safe word?” he asked, looking at me like a little boy who broke his favorite toy.
“I didn’t want to upset you.” I whispered into his neck. The smell of him was intoxicating. I closed my eyes and breathed in as much of him as possible. He took me to his stark white bathroom. He stood me just inside the door as he ran warm water into the tub. “What are you doing?” I asked as I pushed the hair back from my face. Mr. Honor’s eyes danced over my disheveled outfit.
“I thought a bath might make you feel better.” He said sadly and I recognized the look on his face. He felt pity for me. I stumbled forward, placing my hand on his chest.
“Please, don’t go” I tried to hold back the tears but one escaped my eye. William rubbed my cheek with the pad of his thumb. I pushed forward, locking my lips onto his. He reciprocated and my mouth grew hungrier for him. I slipped my tongue past his lips but he grabbed my shoulders and pulled me back from him.
“Get washed up. You will feel better.” With that, he left the room. I began to cry to myself as I slowly pulled my ridiculous outfit off and tossed it on the cold floor. I dipped my toes in the water, which was perfectly warm. I slowly lowered myself down, the water stinging my sore bottom.
I thought about how my life had drastically changed after the last few days. I had been on a downward spiral, but after meeting Mr. Honor I felt like I had a reason to get up in the morning, a reason to show up to class. Here he was feeling as if he had ruined my life, but I felt like he had saved it. He had saved me. I was finally living.
I washed myself quickly and climbed out of the tub. I grabbed the oversize white towel that hung on the hook beside the sink and wrapped it loosely around my body. Wiping away the fog from the mirror, I stared at my reflection. I was pale, heavy dark circles under my eyes. I pulled open the drawer under the vanity and found an unopened toothbrush and tube of toothpaste. I brushed my teeth quickly and ran my fingers through my hair, trying my best to detangle it. When I looked as good as humanly possible, given the circumstances, I slipped the towel off, letting it fall to the floor. With a deep breath, I opened the bathroom door. I glanced around. Mr. Honor was nowhere in sight but I could hear his muffled voice coming from the other side of the room. I walked across the expansive space to his bedroom door. It was open and he was inside, his back to me with his phone at his ear. He was angry and I wondered if I should sneak back to the bathroom and grab the towel. My arm brushed against the door and it opened wider, creaking. Mr. Honor turned around and his eyes locked on to mine. I bit my lip nervously as I stood in front of him, forcing myself not to cover my body.
“Call me back if you hear anything. I have to go.” He said into the phone as his eyes narrowed, dancing over my body. He sat his phone on the dresser as he walked slowly towards me.
“Emma” he whispered quietly and I could not tell if he was upset. His moods changed so often it was hard to keep track of how he felt about me from moment to moment.
He stopped, inches from me, taking in the view.
“Are you mad at me?” I asked. He laughed at the idea.
“How could I ever be mad at you?” he looked genuinely hurt at the idea. He leaned down, kissing me softly on the fore head. I pressed my head harder against his lips and placed my hands softly on his muscular chest. “I’m mad at myself.” He confessed. “Get dressed. I need to take you home.” He turned to his dresser and pulled out a white t-shirt and an old pair of his dark wash jeans.
“But…you said it wasn’t safe for me there.” I took the clothing from him and held it over me.
“It’s not safe for you with me.” He had a pained expression on his face. I stepped towards him but he held up his hand for me to stop. Running his hands through his dark hair, he let out a deep sigh. “You can have the bed, I’ll take the couch.” He walked passed me and out into the main living space, not giving me the chance to object.
I slipped on the oversized white shirt and pulled opened his drawer to put the pants back in. Tucked between the other pairs was a small picture of a woman with long brown hair. I glanced behind me at the door to make sure Mr. Honor was still out in the main area. I flipped the picture over to see if there was a name on the back. In perfect cursive writing was the name Abby. I tucked it back into the drawer and slid in the extra pair of pants. I crawled into the bed and slipped under the covers. That night I dreamed about Mr. Honor with the mystery woman. I pictured him kissing her and holding her. I awoke suddenly, my heart pounding out of my chest, unable to catch my breath. Mr. Honor stood in the dark doorway, his face hard as stone.
“It was just a nightmare.” I reassured him, biting my lip. I could tell by the look on his face he knew I was dreaming about him. He turned and left the room without saying a word. I fell onto the pillow and drifted back off to sleep.
Chapter Twenty-One
Sun poured through the giant bay windows. I sat up, rubbing my eyes and stretching. The smell of coffee wafted through the air. I climbed out of the bed, realizing my bottom was still incredibly sore as I slid off the mattress. I tugged at the t-shirt as I walked out of the bedroom. Mr. Honor stood by the island wearing nothing but his boxer briefs. He ran his hand through his hair when he saw me. I looked down at the ground as I tucked my hair behind my ear.
“Coffee smells good.” I said, trying to sound upbeat. He grabbed the pot and poured a mug for me, and topped his cup off. I watched him over the brim of my mug as he rubbed his eyes. “Didn’t sleep?” I asked and he looked at me for a long moment.
