Just One Kiss
Page 10
He relaxed a little. “Okay.”
“I don’t want her to worry. You can’t tell her.”
“I have to tell her if something is going on in your life, Lillie.”
The girl sighed. “Can you tell my grandma instead?”
She was a good negotiator. “Sure. I’ll tell Ava if I find anything, and I’ll report to you.” Because if someone was bothering Lillie he wanted to make sure it stopped.
“Great.” She held out the money again. “Is this enough?”
“You don’t have to pay me. The first one is free.”
She smiled. “Thanks.” She put the money in her backpack and withdrew a piece of paper. “Here’s his name and where he lives and stuff. So you can find him.”
He took the information. “I’ll look into the situation and get back to you.” He wasn’t sure what was going on with Zack, but he would sure find out.
“Thank you for helping me. Mom’s busy with her new store. She’s really happy and I knew this would upset her. Grandma’s excited, too. So I didn’t know where else to go. Maybe it would be different if I had a dad.” She put her elbows on her thighs and rested her chin in her hands. “I mean, I have a dad, but I never see him.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I don’t remember him at all. He left like when I was born or something. He doesn’t see me.”
She spoke without emotion—because this was all she knew. He wondered what kind of man could walk away from his child, then told himself the question was stupid. Parents walked away from kids all the time. Or did worse. Look at his own father. Justice had lived the nightmare of parental abuse. Having Bart abandon him would have been a kindness.
“If you have questions about him, I’m sure you can talk to your mom,” he said.
“I know. Or Grandma. They tell me that. But what am I supposed to ask?” She straightened and stood. “Thanks for helping me.”
“You’re welcome. I’ll get back to you in a couple of days.”
She grinned. “Can we set up a secret meeting place, like we’re spies?”
“Sure.”
“I’d like that. But it’s okay if you just come to school, too. Mom says you’re busy with your business.”
She picked up her book and her backpack and walked to the main entrance to the hotel. Justice followed her to the door and watched her walk away. Then he took the stairs back to his room. He returned to his computer, but instead of seeing Felicia’s detailed spreadsheet, he saw the past. A much-younger Patience and how she’d smiled at him.
She’d only been about four years older than Lillie. A pretty girl who had grown into a beautiful woman.
He stood and crossed to the window, then stared out at his view of the mountains.
If things had been different, he thought, even though he knew it was a waste of time. Things couldn’t have been different. Not with who he was and how he’d been raised. Bart Hanson had liked living on the wrong side of the law, liked the risk and flirting with death. His sociopathic tendencies had kept everyone around him on edge.
Justice remembered his last night in Fool’s Gold all those years ago. How the phone call had come, warning them Bart had escaped from prison and been spotted in the area. Justice had been whisked away in a matter of seconds. Less than an hour later, a team had arrived to clean out the house. By morning it was as if they’d never been there at all.
He’d raged against being taken away. Had tried to bargain to be allowed to at least phone Patience and tell her what had happened. One of the marshals had explained if she knew, she was in danger. Justice had known that was true and had stopped asking.
After Bart had been captured, Justice was finally free. The murder conviction along with his other crimes had ensured that he would die behind bars. But he hadn’t gone quietly and his final screams as he was led away had been a vow that his son would die. That Bart would hunt him down and kill him.
Even now, long after his father’s death, Justice couldn’t shake the sense that Bart was still out there. Waiting. Watching. That if Justice went too far, got too close to being like everyone else, too close to being happy, his father would pounce and destroy it all.
He glanced down to the street below and saw Lillie walking along the sidewalk. She was joined by a couple of girls her age and they talked and laughed together.
He couldn’t risk it, he thought grimly. His father haunted him. There was no way to know that he could keep anyone he cared about safe. Especially if the enemy was him.
* * *
PATIENCE STOOD LOOKING at the floor in her newly leased space. She’d swept and cleaned in preparation for her meeting with her contractor. But before she handed over the deposit for the remodeling, she wanted to be sure. So she’d shown up, armed with a plan, a tape measure and masking tape.
So far she’d taped in the back and front counters, along with several tables and chairs. She walked back to the front door to confirm the flow, then wandered over to the empty area by the far window. What exactly was she going to put there? She had a cold case she was eyeing, or she could put in some kind of shelving and keep it for small meetings. Like for a book club. Ava kept suggesting a karaoke machine, but Patience wasn’t thrilled about that idea.
She pulled out her phone and took a picture of the taped outlines on the floor, then looked at the next hand-drawn design. Maybe if she moved the tables to the right of the door, she thought.
“Patience?”
She turned toward the sound of her name and looked at the man standing in the open doorway to the store. With the sunlight behind him, she couldn’t see him clearly at first. As he moved inside, she saw the features of an older man. He had green eyes and nearly white hair.
Her first thought was that she’d never seen him before in her life. Only there was something about him. Something familiar. They must have met somewhere and...
Her body stiffened as her brain filled in the blanks. She instinctively took a step back.
“Hello, Patience.”
“Steve.”
He gave her a slight smile. “I wasn’t sure you’d recognize me. We only met that one time.”
“Right. Two weeks before the wedding. You took us out to dinner and promised you’d see us at the ceremony.”
Ned’s father had made other promises. He hadn’t kept those, either. Instead he’d disappeared. She’d been shocked, but Ned had shrugged it off. He wasn’t used to anything better from his father.
“Why are you here?” she asked, her voice cold and stiff.
“I wanted to talk to you.”
“I’m not loaning you money.”
Steve’s expression turned rueful. “I suppose I deserve that. I haven’t been a very good grandfather.”
He’d been just as bad as a father, she thought. When she’d met Ned, one of the things they’d had in common was they’d both been abandoned by their fathers. She hadn’t seen hers in years, while Steve had drifted in and out of Ned’s life. When they’d talked about what they’d been through, Patience thought they had learned the same lesson. That it was important to follow through. To commit.
Instead, Ned had learned how easy it was to walk away.
Maybe it wasn’t fair, but she blamed Steve for that lesson. On a personal level, she wasn’t sorry to have Ned gone and had no interest in having him back. But this wasn’t about her. Lillie was the one who suffered without her father.
He glanced around at the empty storefront. “I heard you’re opening a coffeehouse.”
“Something like that.”
“Congratulations. That’s very exciting.”
She crossed her arms over her chest and watched him. “That’s not why you’re here.”
“No, it’s not.”
He wore a white shirt tucked into jeans. Not the least bit threatening. Still, she couldn’t help thinking she could make a dash for the back door if she had to.
“I’m not the man I was,” he told her. “For years, I had lousy priorities. I lost my wife and my son because of that.”
“You didn’t lose your son,” she told him. “You walked away. There’s a difference.”
“You’re right. I take responsibility for what happened with Ned. I’ve tried to see him, but he has no interest in me.” His green eyes grew thoughtful. “I can’t blame him for that, but I do wish things had been different.”
She tensed. “You’re here because of Lillie.”
“I’d like a chance to get to know her.”
She wanted to tell him no. To scream at him to get out of here and never come back. Lillie didn’t need another male relative breaking her heart.
“I’m retired now,” he went on. “I have been for a few years. I took stock of my life and realized I’d focused on the wrong things.” He gave her a slight smile. “I went into therapy and figured out what I’d done wrong. I want to do better, be better, for my granddaughter.”
“Can you think of a single reason why I should trust you?”
Steve shook his head. “Not one.”
She could feel herself getting angry. She wanted to scream that nothing about this was fair. Instead, she spoke the truth.
“I blame you for Ned’s behavior. He did what you taught him. He walked away. Do you know he never sees Lillie? He signed away all rights to her so he wouldn’t have to pay child support. She’s a sweet, smart little girl and I’m the one who had to explain why she doesn’t have a daddy anymore. For now she accepts what I’ve told her, but what do you think is going to happen when she’s older? When she figures out that her father simply wasn’t interested in her? How much do you think that’s going to hurt?”
“I’m sorry.”
“Being sorry isn’t good enough. It’s bad enough that Ned left me, but he also abandoned my daughter and I’ll never forgive him for that. There is absolutely no reason for me to trust you with Lillie. Not ever.”
He held out his hands, palms up. “You’re right. There is no reason to trust me. But that doesn’t change the fact that I’m Lillie’s grandfather and I want to get to know her. I want to be a part of her life. I’m asking for a chance with her.”
“What’s the plan? Are you going to show up a few times, get her to like you, then disappear and break her heart?”
“No,” he said quietly. “I’ve moved nearby. I want to be close to the only family I have left. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to earn your trust.” He hesitated, as if he had more he wanted to say, then shook his head. “Please think about it,” he added.
Patience hated that an outright no wasn’t an option. While there was nothing he could say that would make her trust him, that wasn’t the point. If Steve wasn’t a complete jerk, then Lillie deserved to know her grandfather. She deserved to have more family, more people to care about her.
Steve pulled a business card out of his shirt pocket. “Here’s my cell number. I’ll be around. You can limit my visits, supervise them or make me post a bond.” He gave her a quick smile. “Whatever it takes, Patience. I’m sorry for how my actions affected you. If I could change them, I would. Believe me.”
He handed her the card, then left. She shoved the card into her back pocket and did her best to forget about it. Having Lillie’s grandfather show up like that was one thing she didn’t want to have to deal with.
* * *
JUSTICE KNOCKED ON the house’s front door. A couple of minutes later, Ava opened it and smiled at him.
“Patience isn’t here,” she said by way of greeting. “She’s working at the salon this afternoon.”
“You’re the one I came to see.”
Ava laughed and invited him in. “I will take that comment in the spirit in which you meant it and not infer any other motive.”
Justice grinned. “Thank you.”
She led the way to the sofa. Today her steps weren’t as steady as they had been before and she was using a cane. The disease, he thought, wishing there was a way for her to get better.
When they were both seated, she turned to him. “How can I help?”
“Lillie came to see me.” He explained about Zack and how Lillie was uncomfortable around the boy. “She wants me to find out what’s going on and make it stop. She says she’s not being bullied, but I’m less sure. Under normal circumstances, I’d confront the guy myself. But he’s a ten-year-old kid.”
“I can see how that would make you uncomfortable,” Ava told him. “I didn’t know Lillie was concerned about anyone.”
“I think she came to me because I’m a professional. But this is out of my area of expertise.”
“I understand.” Ava thought for a second. “I’m going to call the school and arrange a meeting with the counselor and the teacher. Maybe we can get an answer that way. I’ll tell Patience, but ask her to let you and me handle this. That way if Lillie asks if she was there, you can say no.”
“I appreciate your help.”
Ava smiled. “You’ve always been very sweet to my girl. Even when you were much younger. I’m happy to help now.”
He wasn’t sure he would define his feelings as “sweet,” but that wasn’t a conversation he was going to have with Patience’s mother. He wasn’t sure he would even have it with Patience herself. He didn’t know what was happening between them. He knew what he wanted, but going there meant inviting danger. His need to protect Patience was more important than his desire for her. Which left him with something of a dilemma.
“I don’t want her to worry. You can’t tell her.”
“I have to tell her if something is going on in your life, Lillie.”
The girl sighed. “Can you tell my grandma instead?”
She was a good negotiator. “Sure. I’ll tell Ava if I find anything, and I’ll report to you.” Because if someone was bothering Lillie he wanted to make sure it stopped.
“Great.” She held out the money again. “Is this enough?”
“You don’t have to pay me. The first one is free.”
She smiled. “Thanks.” She put the money in her backpack and withdrew a piece of paper. “Here’s his name and where he lives and stuff. So you can find him.”
He took the information. “I’ll look into the situation and get back to you.” He wasn’t sure what was going on with Zack, but he would sure find out.
“Thank you for helping me. Mom’s busy with her new store. She’s really happy and I knew this would upset her. Grandma’s excited, too. So I didn’t know where else to go. Maybe it would be different if I had a dad.” She put her elbows on her thighs and rested her chin in her hands. “I mean, I have a dad, but I never see him.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I don’t remember him at all. He left like when I was born or something. He doesn’t see me.”
She spoke without emotion—because this was all she knew. He wondered what kind of man could walk away from his child, then told himself the question was stupid. Parents walked away from kids all the time. Or did worse. Look at his own father. Justice had lived the nightmare of parental abuse. Having Bart abandon him would have been a kindness.
“If you have questions about him, I’m sure you can talk to your mom,” he said.
“I know. Or Grandma. They tell me that. But what am I supposed to ask?” She straightened and stood. “Thanks for helping me.”
“You’re welcome. I’ll get back to you in a couple of days.”
She grinned. “Can we set up a secret meeting place, like we’re spies?”
“Sure.”
“I’d like that. But it’s okay if you just come to school, too. Mom says you’re busy with your business.”
She picked up her book and her backpack and walked to the main entrance to the hotel. Justice followed her to the door and watched her walk away. Then he took the stairs back to his room. He returned to his computer, but instead of seeing Felicia’s detailed spreadsheet, he saw the past. A much-younger Patience and how she’d smiled at him.
She’d only been about four years older than Lillie. A pretty girl who had grown into a beautiful woman.
He stood and crossed to the window, then stared out at his view of the mountains.
If things had been different, he thought, even though he knew it was a waste of time. Things couldn’t have been different. Not with who he was and how he’d been raised. Bart Hanson had liked living on the wrong side of the law, liked the risk and flirting with death. His sociopathic tendencies had kept everyone around him on edge.
Justice remembered his last night in Fool’s Gold all those years ago. How the phone call had come, warning them Bart had escaped from prison and been spotted in the area. Justice had been whisked away in a matter of seconds. Less than an hour later, a team had arrived to clean out the house. By morning it was as if they’d never been there at all.
He’d raged against being taken away. Had tried to bargain to be allowed to at least phone Patience and tell her what had happened. One of the marshals had explained if she knew, she was in danger. Justice had known that was true and had stopped asking.
After Bart had been captured, Justice was finally free. The murder conviction along with his other crimes had ensured that he would die behind bars. But he hadn’t gone quietly and his final screams as he was led away had been a vow that his son would die. That Bart would hunt him down and kill him.
Even now, long after his father’s death, Justice couldn’t shake the sense that Bart was still out there. Waiting. Watching. That if Justice went too far, got too close to being like everyone else, too close to being happy, his father would pounce and destroy it all.
He glanced down to the street below and saw Lillie walking along the sidewalk. She was joined by a couple of girls her age and they talked and laughed together.
He couldn’t risk it, he thought grimly. His father haunted him. There was no way to know that he could keep anyone he cared about safe. Especially if the enemy was him.
* * *
PATIENCE STOOD LOOKING at the floor in her newly leased space. She’d swept and cleaned in preparation for her meeting with her contractor. But before she handed over the deposit for the remodeling, she wanted to be sure. So she’d shown up, armed with a plan, a tape measure and masking tape.
So far she’d taped in the back and front counters, along with several tables and chairs. She walked back to the front door to confirm the flow, then wandered over to the empty area by the far window. What exactly was she going to put there? She had a cold case she was eyeing, or she could put in some kind of shelving and keep it for small meetings. Like for a book club. Ava kept suggesting a karaoke machine, but Patience wasn’t thrilled about that idea.
She pulled out her phone and took a picture of the taped outlines on the floor, then looked at the next hand-drawn design. Maybe if she moved the tables to the right of the door, she thought.
“Patience?”
She turned toward the sound of her name and looked at the man standing in the open doorway to the store. With the sunlight behind him, she couldn’t see him clearly at first. As he moved inside, she saw the features of an older man. He had green eyes and nearly white hair.
Her first thought was that she’d never seen him before in her life. Only there was something about him. Something familiar. They must have met somewhere and...
Her body stiffened as her brain filled in the blanks. She instinctively took a step back.
“Hello, Patience.”
“Steve.”
He gave her a slight smile. “I wasn’t sure you’d recognize me. We only met that one time.”
“Right. Two weeks before the wedding. You took us out to dinner and promised you’d see us at the ceremony.”
Ned’s father had made other promises. He hadn’t kept those, either. Instead he’d disappeared. She’d been shocked, but Ned had shrugged it off. He wasn’t used to anything better from his father.
“Why are you here?” she asked, her voice cold and stiff.
“I wanted to talk to you.”
“I’m not loaning you money.”
Steve’s expression turned rueful. “I suppose I deserve that. I haven’t been a very good grandfather.”
He’d been just as bad as a father, she thought. When she’d met Ned, one of the things they’d had in common was they’d both been abandoned by their fathers. She hadn’t seen hers in years, while Steve had drifted in and out of Ned’s life. When they’d talked about what they’d been through, Patience thought they had learned the same lesson. That it was important to follow through. To commit.
Instead, Ned had learned how easy it was to walk away.
Maybe it wasn’t fair, but she blamed Steve for that lesson. On a personal level, she wasn’t sorry to have Ned gone and had no interest in having him back. But this wasn’t about her. Lillie was the one who suffered without her father.
He glanced around at the empty storefront. “I heard you’re opening a coffeehouse.”
“Something like that.”
“Congratulations. That’s very exciting.”
She crossed her arms over her chest and watched him. “That’s not why you’re here.”
“No, it’s not.”
He wore a white shirt tucked into jeans. Not the least bit threatening. Still, she couldn’t help thinking she could make a dash for the back door if she had to.
“I’m not the man I was,” he told her. “For years, I had lousy priorities. I lost my wife and my son because of that.”
“You didn’t lose your son,” she told him. “You walked away. There’s a difference.”
“You’re right. I take responsibility for what happened with Ned. I’ve tried to see him, but he has no interest in me.” His green eyes grew thoughtful. “I can’t blame him for that, but I do wish things had been different.”
She tensed. “You’re here because of Lillie.”
“I’d like a chance to get to know her.”
She wanted to tell him no. To scream at him to get out of here and never come back. Lillie didn’t need another male relative breaking her heart.
“I’m retired now,” he went on. “I have been for a few years. I took stock of my life and realized I’d focused on the wrong things.” He gave her a slight smile. “I went into therapy and figured out what I’d done wrong. I want to do better, be better, for my granddaughter.”
“Can you think of a single reason why I should trust you?”
Steve shook his head. “Not one.”
She could feel herself getting angry. She wanted to scream that nothing about this was fair. Instead, she spoke the truth.
“I blame you for Ned’s behavior. He did what you taught him. He walked away. Do you know he never sees Lillie? He signed away all rights to her so he wouldn’t have to pay child support. She’s a sweet, smart little girl and I’m the one who had to explain why she doesn’t have a daddy anymore. For now she accepts what I’ve told her, but what do you think is going to happen when she’s older? When she figures out that her father simply wasn’t interested in her? How much do you think that’s going to hurt?”
“I’m sorry.”
“Being sorry isn’t good enough. It’s bad enough that Ned left me, but he also abandoned my daughter and I’ll never forgive him for that. There is absolutely no reason for me to trust you with Lillie. Not ever.”
He held out his hands, palms up. “You’re right. There is no reason to trust me. But that doesn’t change the fact that I’m Lillie’s grandfather and I want to get to know her. I want to be a part of her life. I’m asking for a chance with her.”
“What’s the plan? Are you going to show up a few times, get her to like you, then disappear and break her heart?”
“No,” he said quietly. “I’ve moved nearby. I want to be close to the only family I have left. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to earn your trust.” He hesitated, as if he had more he wanted to say, then shook his head. “Please think about it,” he added.
Patience hated that an outright no wasn’t an option. While there was nothing he could say that would make her trust him, that wasn’t the point. If Steve wasn’t a complete jerk, then Lillie deserved to know her grandfather. She deserved to have more family, more people to care about her.
Steve pulled a business card out of his shirt pocket. “Here’s my cell number. I’ll be around. You can limit my visits, supervise them or make me post a bond.” He gave her a quick smile. “Whatever it takes, Patience. I’m sorry for how my actions affected you. If I could change them, I would. Believe me.”
He handed her the card, then left. She shoved the card into her back pocket and did her best to forget about it. Having Lillie’s grandfather show up like that was one thing she didn’t want to have to deal with.
* * *
JUSTICE KNOCKED ON the house’s front door. A couple of minutes later, Ava opened it and smiled at him.
“Patience isn’t here,” she said by way of greeting. “She’s working at the salon this afternoon.”
“You’re the one I came to see.”
Ava laughed and invited him in. “I will take that comment in the spirit in which you meant it and not infer any other motive.”
Justice grinned. “Thank you.”
She led the way to the sofa. Today her steps weren’t as steady as they had been before and she was using a cane. The disease, he thought, wishing there was a way for her to get better.
When they were both seated, she turned to him. “How can I help?”
“Lillie came to see me.” He explained about Zack and how Lillie was uncomfortable around the boy. “She wants me to find out what’s going on and make it stop. She says she’s not being bullied, but I’m less sure. Under normal circumstances, I’d confront the guy myself. But he’s a ten-year-old kid.”
“I can see how that would make you uncomfortable,” Ava told him. “I didn’t know Lillie was concerned about anyone.”
“I think she came to me because I’m a professional. But this is out of my area of expertise.”
“I understand.” Ava thought for a second. “I’m going to call the school and arrange a meeting with the counselor and the teacher. Maybe we can get an answer that way. I’ll tell Patience, but ask her to let you and me handle this. That way if Lillie asks if she was there, you can say no.”
“I appreciate your help.”
Ava smiled. “You’ve always been very sweet to my girl. Even when you were much younger. I’m happy to help now.”
He wasn’t sure he would define his feelings as “sweet,” but that wasn’t a conversation he was going to have with Patience’s mother. He wasn’t sure he would even have it with Patience herself. He didn’t know what was happening between them. He knew what he wanted, but going there meant inviting danger. His need to protect Patience was more important than his desire for her. Which left him with something of a dilemma.
