Just One Kiss
Page 33
Patience grinned. “You’re not going to live with him before the wedding?”
Ava blushed, then ducked her head. “I wasn’t sure you’d approve.”
“Why would you think that, Mom? I’m pretty sure you know there’s some sneaking around going on upstairs.”
“I have suspected. But that’s different. I’m your mother.”
“You’re a beautiful, vital woman and if you want to move in with the man you love, I say go for it. Lillie won’t mind that her grandparents are living together.”
Ava hugged her. “I love you so much, Patience. You have always been the best part of my life.”
“I love you, too, Mom.” She drew back and grinned. “We can get you a fabulous dress at Paper Moon.”
Her mother shuddered. “That isn’t happening. I’m thinking of a pretty suit, not a wedding gown. Why don’t you and I take Lillie into San Francisco when school gets out? We’ll go for a couple of nights. Stay somewhere by the water and find dresses. Then we’ll have the ceremony right here in the backyard.”
“I love that idea.”
They picked up their wine and toasted again.
“To happy endings,” her mother said.
“To falling in love.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
PATIENCE SAT IN a booth at Jo’s Bar as the sodas and iced teas were passed around. She was still feeling the glow from the previous night’s announcement and was thrilled to be able to share the news with her friends.
Noelle sat by Felicia, with Isabel between them. Patience was next to Felicia.
“It’s all everyone is talking about,” Isabel said with a grin. “I already called your mom and invited her to come and try on gowns.”
“Did she hang up on you?” Patience asked, slipping her straw into her glass of diet soda.
“Nearly. She said she wasn’t interested in anything I had. I pretended to be crushed, which was fun.” Isabel shook her head. “The poor woman still thinks she’s getting away with only you and Lillie at the ceremony.”
“Totally delusional,” Patience agreed. She turned to Felicia and Noelle. “No way that will happen in this town. My mom grew up here. She knows everyone. I think a backyard wedding is a great idea. We can have the reception at Brew-haha, but as for keeping the guest list down to immediate family? No way.”
“Historically, a wedding is as much a contract as a celebration,” Felicia said. “The blending of families was seen as mutually beneficial. Did you know that the female fantasy of being carried off by a handsome stranger can be traced back to times of precivilization when women were stolen by neighboring tribes? The stolen woman provided fresh DNA, which ensured healthier children.”
Noelle sipped her tea. “I can’t wait to see you drunk.”
Felicia stared at her. “Why?”
“I’ll bet you edit about half of what you say. I want to hear the whole thing. You’re so fascinating.”
Felicia shifted, obviously uncomfortable with the compliment. “I know I can be professorial.”
“A little, but it’s fun.” Noelle looked at Patience. “Let me know if you need any help getting things ready for the wedding. I’m at a slow stage with my business. I have the lease signed, but there’s about three weeks’ worth of remodeling that has to be done. I’ve started ordering my inventory, but some items are going to take six weeks. So I have time to run errands or whatever.”
“Thanks,” Patience said. “I’ll let you know. First my mom has to face reality. If she’s getting married in town, she’s going to have a guest list pushing two hundred people. I can’t wait!”
“It’s just plain romantic,” Noelle said with a sigh. “Finding love later in life.”
“It gives us all hope.” Isabel sipped her drink. “So, Patience, was Justice different than what you remembered?”
“His basic character is the same. He’s still sweet and funny.”
Felicia frowned. “Justice?”
“I know there are other sides to him, but I don’t see them as much.”
“Unless these two are keeping secrets,” Isabel said, “you’re going to have to have a relationship for all of us. My marriage disaster isn’t anything I want to risk repeating.”
“I’m recovering from a broken engagement,” Noelle said.
They all looked at her.
“I’m sorry,” Felicia said. “I didn’t know.”
“I hadn’t said anything to anyone. It sounds so sad. A broken engagement. Like it got dropped on the floor or something.”
Felicia picked up her drink. “I can’t bond on this subject. I haven’t been in any kind of romantic relationship and my sexual encounters have all been extremely short. I’m considering the possibility that I have responsibility in that beyond the barrier of my intelligence.”
“That you’re avoiding men who might want more from you?” Patience asked.
“Yes, and that I’m not putting myself in the appropriate social situations. I say I want to fall in love and have a family, but until I moved here, I hadn’t done anything to facilitate that occurring.”
Isabel leaned into Felicia. “We’ve all been idiots. Don’t beat yourself up about it. You see what you’ve been doing and now you can correct the problem.”
“I’m not always successful at self-correcting.”
“None of us are,” Noelle told her. “But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t keep on trying.”
* * *
“DO YOU know what you’re doing?” Lillie asked.
Her tone was gentle and her gaze warm and affectionate, but Justice still felt the sting of her words.
“I’m trying,” he muttered, carefully combing her hair.
This wasn’t supposed to happen, he thought grimly. One of the staff had called in sick, so Ava had gone in to help at the store. Patience had phoned and promised she would be back in time to get Lillie ready, but she was—he glanced at the clock—twenty minutes late. Apparently the last day of school was a big deal for a ten-year-old, so Justice had stepped in to fill the breach, so to speak. Or in this case, try to figure out how to make a fancy braid look right.
“I can show you on a doll,” Lillie offered.
He sectioned the hair, as he’d been shown and tried to manipulate it the way he’d seen Patience do it a hundred times. Her fingers flew through the process. It had looked so easy.
“If you and Mom get married, you need to think about having a boy,” Lillie told him. “You’d like that and you wouldn’t have to worry about his hair.”
He dropped his hands and stared at her, at her pretty face, at the affection in her eyes. He heard the acceptance in her words. She’d taken him into her heart, much as he suspected her mother had.
“Lillie,” he began, not sure what to say.
She flung herself at him, hanging on tight. He hugged her back, barely aware of the twinge in his midsection.
“You’d be a good dad,” she whispered in his ear.
The front door flew open.
“I know, I know,” Patience said as she hurried inside. “I was watching the clock. Then I turned around and I was late. I ran the whole way.”
She was flushed and panting, proof of her point. She hurried toward them, then paused. “You look so grown-up. When did that happen?”
Lillie smoothed the front of her pink-and-white dress and smiled. “Mom, we can talk about me growing up later. I need to get to school.”
“Right. French braid.”
Patience took the comb from Justice and smoothed her daughter’s hair. Seconds later her fingers were moving in rapid sequence. More quickly than he could have thought possible, it was done and she’d tied a pink ribbon on the end.
Patience rose and headed for the stairs. “Wait right there. I have something for you.”
Lillie turned to Justice. “Do you know what it is?”
“I don’t.”
“Mom gives the best presents. Just wait until Christmas. You won’t believe what you find under the tree.”
Christmas. He’d never had much reason to acknowledge the holiday. He’d usually been working and often out of the country. He would guess that in Fool’s Gold the season was celebrated with gusto and festivals.
There would be snow, he thought. Traditions. It would be a time of memories and belonging. Did he want that? Could he let go of his past and be a part of something that lasted?
Patience raced down the stairs and handed her daughter a pale silver box. The fancy script said Jenel’s Gems in the corner.
Lillie’s eyes widened. “For me?”
Patience hugged her. “I’m so proud of you. You’re a good student. You’re interested and curious and you work hard. This isn’t all about your grades, though. This is because you’re a wonderful daughter and I love you so very much.”
Lillie’s eyes filled with tears. She held on to her mom and mumbled, “I love you, too.”
He watched them, both in the moment and separated from it. He’d never had anything like this, he thought. He was sure his mother had been tender with him when he was young, but by the time Justice was six, Bart didn’t allow any signs of affection. He didn’t want to “weaken the boy,” as he put it.
What his father had never seen was the power and strength in love.
Lillie straightened then she opened the box. Inside was a gold butterfly charm on a delicate chain. She gasped.
“Do you like it?” Patience asked. “I saw it and thought of you. Here, let me put it on you.”
Lillie turned.
Patience slipped the necklace over her daughter’s head, then fastened it. Lillie ran toward the downstairs bathroom.
“I want to see! I want to see!”
Patience smiled at him. “Her birthday’s in a couple of months and she doesn’t know it yet, but I’m going to let her pierce her ears. I already bought the butterfly posts for her.”
He touched her cheek. “You’re a good mom.”
“I hope so. Thanks for helping with all this. Her last day of school crept up on me. I’m totally not prepared.”
“You’ve had a few things going on.”
Lillie returned and threw her arms around both of them. “I love it, Mom. I really love it!”
“I’m glad.”
Justice squeezed her tightly before letting her go. They all stood.
“Okay,” Patience said. “Eleven-thirty. We’ll all be there.” She looked at him.
He nodded. “I’ll be there on time. I promise. We’ll take pictures.”
Lillie beamed. “There’s not a ceremony or anything. It’s not like next year when I graduate. But there will be cookies.”
Patience bent down and kissed her daughter’s cheek. Lillie moved to Justice, her body language expectant.
It took him a second to realize what she wanted—the same kiss on the cheek. He bent forward and lightly touched his mouth to her smooth skin. When he straightened, she danced away.
“Bye. See you at eleven-thirty.”
“Bye,” Patience called after her. When the door closed, she turned to Justice. “Okay, I have to get back to the store. You know where the school is and everything?”
He nodded.
She kissed him on the mouth, and then she was gone, too.
He was left standing alone, apparently the only one aware of what had just happened.
* * *
“YOU’RE NOT listening,” Felicia said.
With any other woman, the words would be a complaint, but with Felicia it was simply a statement of fact.
“I know you find the topic of the business interesting,” she continued. “So your inattention must have another source.” She raised her eyebrows. “Patience?”
They were at the dining table of the small, furnished town house Felicia had rented. Papers were spread in front of him, but he hadn’t read any of them.
“Patience,” he agreed.
“It wasn’t a significant guess for me. She’s been on your mind a lot lately.”
“It’s not just her. It’s Lillie, too. And Ava, although less her. She’ll be moving out to live with Steve.” He rose and walked to the window, then turned back. “I can’t sleep anymore. I can’t stop thinking about them. Lillie’s going to be eleven. I don’t know anything about eleven-year-old girls. But she hugged me and wanted me to kiss her on the cheek.”
“She loves you. You’re a natural father figure. Did you think she wouldn’t bond with you?”
“I didn’t think about it one way or the other. I was focused on Patience. I like Lillie. I’d do anything for her. But what if I hurt her? I could hurt them both.” He felt his hands curl into fists and had to consciously relax his fingers.
“How can I know I’m good enough? How can I be sure he’s gone?” He shook his head. “I know my father is dead. You don’t have to remind me. That’s not what I mean.”
She stood and crossed to him. “I know what you mean. You’re afraid that who he was is a result of biology and that you’ve inherited his, for lack of a better word, evilness.”
“I can’t risk it.”
She pressed her palm against his chest, over his heart. “You love them.”
He closed his eyes, then opened them again. “I don’t want to put them in danger.”
“Love can’t do that.”
Ava blushed, then ducked her head. “I wasn’t sure you’d approve.”
“Why would you think that, Mom? I’m pretty sure you know there’s some sneaking around going on upstairs.”
“I have suspected. But that’s different. I’m your mother.”
“You’re a beautiful, vital woman and if you want to move in with the man you love, I say go for it. Lillie won’t mind that her grandparents are living together.”
Ava hugged her. “I love you so much, Patience. You have always been the best part of my life.”
“I love you, too, Mom.” She drew back and grinned. “We can get you a fabulous dress at Paper Moon.”
Her mother shuddered. “That isn’t happening. I’m thinking of a pretty suit, not a wedding gown. Why don’t you and I take Lillie into San Francisco when school gets out? We’ll go for a couple of nights. Stay somewhere by the water and find dresses. Then we’ll have the ceremony right here in the backyard.”
“I love that idea.”
They picked up their wine and toasted again.
“To happy endings,” her mother said.
“To falling in love.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
PATIENCE SAT IN a booth at Jo’s Bar as the sodas and iced teas were passed around. She was still feeling the glow from the previous night’s announcement and was thrilled to be able to share the news with her friends.
Noelle sat by Felicia, with Isabel between them. Patience was next to Felicia.
“It’s all everyone is talking about,” Isabel said with a grin. “I already called your mom and invited her to come and try on gowns.”
“Did she hang up on you?” Patience asked, slipping her straw into her glass of diet soda.
“Nearly. She said she wasn’t interested in anything I had. I pretended to be crushed, which was fun.” Isabel shook her head. “The poor woman still thinks she’s getting away with only you and Lillie at the ceremony.”
“Totally delusional,” Patience agreed. She turned to Felicia and Noelle. “No way that will happen in this town. My mom grew up here. She knows everyone. I think a backyard wedding is a great idea. We can have the reception at Brew-haha, but as for keeping the guest list down to immediate family? No way.”
“Historically, a wedding is as much a contract as a celebration,” Felicia said. “The blending of families was seen as mutually beneficial. Did you know that the female fantasy of being carried off by a handsome stranger can be traced back to times of precivilization when women were stolen by neighboring tribes? The stolen woman provided fresh DNA, which ensured healthier children.”
Noelle sipped her tea. “I can’t wait to see you drunk.”
Felicia stared at her. “Why?”
“I’ll bet you edit about half of what you say. I want to hear the whole thing. You’re so fascinating.”
Felicia shifted, obviously uncomfortable with the compliment. “I know I can be professorial.”
“A little, but it’s fun.” Noelle looked at Patience. “Let me know if you need any help getting things ready for the wedding. I’m at a slow stage with my business. I have the lease signed, but there’s about three weeks’ worth of remodeling that has to be done. I’ve started ordering my inventory, but some items are going to take six weeks. So I have time to run errands or whatever.”
“Thanks,” Patience said. “I’ll let you know. First my mom has to face reality. If she’s getting married in town, she’s going to have a guest list pushing two hundred people. I can’t wait!”
“It’s just plain romantic,” Noelle said with a sigh. “Finding love later in life.”
“It gives us all hope.” Isabel sipped her drink. “So, Patience, was Justice different than what you remembered?”
“His basic character is the same. He’s still sweet and funny.”
Felicia frowned. “Justice?”
“I know there are other sides to him, but I don’t see them as much.”
“Unless these two are keeping secrets,” Isabel said, “you’re going to have to have a relationship for all of us. My marriage disaster isn’t anything I want to risk repeating.”
“I’m recovering from a broken engagement,” Noelle said.
They all looked at her.
“I’m sorry,” Felicia said. “I didn’t know.”
“I hadn’t said anything to anyone. It sounds so sad. A broken engagement. Like it got dropped on the floor or something.”
Felicia picked up her drink. “I can’t bond on this subject. I haven’t been in any kind of romantic relationship and my sexual encounters have all been extremely short. I’m considering the possibility that I have responsibility in that beyond the barrier of my intelligence.”
“That you’re avoiding men who might want more from you?” Patience asked.
“Yes, and that I’m not putting myself in the appropriate social situations. I say I want to fall in love and have a family, but until I moved here, I hadn’t done anything to facilitate that occurring.”
Isabel leaned into Felicia. “We’ve all been idiots. Don’t beat yourself up about it. You see what you’ve been doing and now you can correct the problem.”
“I’m not always successful at self-correcting.”
“None of us are,” Noelle told her. “But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t keep on trying.”
* * *
“DO YOU know what you’re doing?” Lillie asked.
Her tone was gentle and her gaze warm and affectionate, but Justice still felt the sting of her words.
“I’m trying,” he muttered, carefully combing her hair.
This wasn’t supposed to happen, he thought grimly. One of the staff had called in sick, so Ava had gone in to help at the store. Patience had phoned and promised she would be back in time to get Lillie ready, but she was—he glanced at the clock—twenty minutes late. Apparently the last day of school was a big deal for a ten-year-old, so Justice had stepped in to fill the breach, so to speak. Or in this case, try to figure out how to make a fancy braid look right.
“I can show you on a doll,” Lillie offered.
He sectioned the hair, as he’d been shown and tried to manipulate it the way he’d seen Patience do it a hundred times. Her fingers flew through the process. It had looked so easy.
“If you and Mom get married, you need to think about having a boy,” Lillie told him. “You’d like that and you wouldn’t have to worry about his hair.”
He dropped his hands and stared at her, at her pretty face, at the affection in her eyes. He heard the acceptance in her words. She’d taken him into her heart, much as he suspected her mother had.
“Lillie,” he began, not sure what to say.
She flung herself at him, hanging on tight. He hugged her back, barely aware of the twinge in his midsection.
“You’d be a good dad,” she whispered in his ear.
The front door flew open.
“I know, I know,” Patience said as she hurried inside. “I was watching the clock. Then I turned around and I was late. I ran the whole way.”
She was flushed and panting, proof of her point. She hurried toward them, then paused. “You look so grown-up. When did that happen?”
Lillie smoothed the front of her pink-and-white dress and smiled. “Mom, we can talk about me growing up later. I need to get to school.”
“Right. French braid.”
Patience took the comb from Justice and smoothed her daughter’s hair. Seconds later her fingers were moving in rapid sequence. More quickly than he could have thought possible, it was done and she’d tied a pink ribbon on the end.
Patience rose and headed for the stairs. “Wait right there. I have something for you.”
Lillie turned to Justice. “Do you know what it is?”
“I don’t.”
“Mom gives the best presents. Just wait until Christmas. You won’t believe what you find under the tree.”
Christmas. He’d never had much reason to acknowledge the holiday. He’d usually been working and often out of the country. He would guess that in Fool’s Gold the season was celebrated with gusto and festivals.
There would be snow, he thought. Traditions. It would be a time of memories and belonging. Did he want that? Could he let go of his past and be a part of something that lasted?
Patience raced down the stairs and handed her daughter a pale silver box. The fancy script said Jenel’s Gems in the corner.
Lillie’s eyes widened. “For me?”
Patience hugged her. “I’m so proud of you. You’re a good student. You’re interested and curious and you work hard. This isn’t all about your grades, though. This is because you’re a wonderful daughter and I love you so very much.”
Lillie’s eyes filled with tears. She held on to her mom and mumbled, “I love you, too.”
He watched them, both in the moment and separated from it. He’d never had anything like this, he thought. He was sure his mother had been tender with him when he was young, but by the time Justice was six, Bart didn’t allow any signs of affection. He didn’t want to “weaken the boy,” as he put it.
What his father had never seen was the power and strength in love.
Lillie straightened then she opened the box. Inside was a gold butterfly charm on a delicate chain. She gasped.
“Do you like it?” Patience asked. “I saw it and thought of you. Here, let me put it on you.”
Lillie turned.
Patience slipped the necklace over her daughter’s head, then fastened it. Lillie ran toward the downstairs bathroom.
“I want to see! I want to see!”
Patience smiled at him. “Her birthday’s in a couple of months and she doesn’t know it yet, but I’m going to let her pierce her ears. I already bought the butterfly posts for her.”
He touched her cheek. “You’re a good mom.”
“I hope so. Thanks for helping with all this. Her last day of school crept up on me. I’m totally not prepared.”
“You’ve had a few things going on.”
Lillie returned and threw her arms around both of them. “I love it, Mom. I really love it!”
“I’m glad.”
Justice squeezed her tightly before letting her go. They all stood.
“Okay,” Patience said. “Eleven-thirty. We’ll all be there.” She looked at him.
He nodded. “I’ll be there on time. I promise. We’ll take pictures.”
Lillie beamed. “There’s not a ceremony or anything. It’s not like next year when I graduate. But there will be cookies.”
Patience bent down and kissed her daughter’s cheek. Lillie moved to Justice, her body language expectant.
It took him a second to realize what she wanted—the same kiss on the cheek. He bent forward and lightly touched his mouth to her smooth skin. When he straightened, she danced away.
“Bye. See you at eleven-thirty.”
“Bye,” Patience called after her. When the door closed, she turned to Justice. “Okay, I have to get back to the store. You know where the school is and everything?”
He nodded.
She kissed him on the mouth, and then she was gone, too.
He was left standing alone, apparently the only one aware of what had just happened.
* * *
“YOU’RE NOT listening,” Felicia said.
With any other woman, the words would be a complaint, but with Felicia it was simply a statement of fact.
“I know you find the topic of the business interesting,” she continued. “So your inattention must have another source.” She raised her eyebrows. “Patience?”
They were at the dining table of the small, furnished town house Felicia had rented. Papers were spread in front of him, but he hadn’t read any of them.
“Patience,” he agreed.
“It wasn’t a significant guess for me. She’s been on your mind a lot lately.”
“It’s not just her. It’s Lillie, too. And Ava, although less her. She’ll be moving out to live with Steve.” He rose and walked to the window, then turned back. “I can’t sleep anymore. I can’t stop thinking about them. Lillie’s going to be eleven. I don’t know anything about eleven-year-old girls. But she hugged me and wanted me to kiss her on the cheek.”
“She loves you. You’re a natural father figure. Did you think she wouldn’t bond with you?”
“I didn’t think about it one way or the other. I was focused on Patience. I like Lillie. I’d do anything for her. But what if I hurt her? I could hurt them both.” He felt his hands curl into fists and had to consciously relax his fingers.
“How can I know I’m good enough? How can I be sure he’s gone?” He shook his head. “I know my father is dead. You don’t have to remind me. That’s not what I mean.”
She stood and crossed to him. “I know what you mean. You’re afraid that who he was is a result of biology and that you’ve inherited his, for lack of a better word, evilness.”
“I can’t risk it.”
She pressed her palm against his chest, over his heart. “You love them.”
He closed his eyes, then opened them again. “I don’t want to put them in danger.”
“Love can’t do that.”
